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Vietnam War veteran from New Jersey returns diary to family of fallen Vietnamese soldier

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Vietnam War veteran from New Jersey returns diary to family of fallen Vietnamese soldier


BERGENFIELD, N.J. — A local Vietnam veteran recently found himself back in Vietnam to return something he found on the battlefield almost six decades ago.

The item belonged to a North Vietnamese solider, and the sincere search for its owner was reported in a local New Jersey paper, which eventually made news over 8,500 miles away.

Vietnam War veteran Peter Mathews says “that besides having children and being married, that it had to be one of the best days I’ve had, to return the book.”

It took him 56 years and 87 days to return a small book he found on a hill during the Vietnam War — an eye-catching diary left behind after a bloody battle in Dak To, its pages filled with colorful illustrations, music and poetry.

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It was 1967 in South Vietnam. Mathews remembers the hill where he found it, adding it was there that one of their helicopters was shot down.

Mathews, then a sergeant with the 1st Calvary Division, landed on Hill 724 after the bloody battle. His division was ordered to count bodies and look for war documents from the enemy.

He found the diary, wrapped in plastic, in an abandoned backpack. In a split-second decision, he decided to keep it.

When asked why, Mathews says, “I recognized the beauty of it. The handwriting was amazing. And I just thought it was something to really cherish.”

He stuffed it in his pocket, adding, “I was also a little bit scared that if somebody else would see it, they told me to turn it in, to be honest.”

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With only weeks left to serve, his sole focus was survival and getting back home, but his homecoming to New Jersey posed new challenges. Originally from the Netherlands, he was drafted with only a Green Card and was told he had to wait for his U.S. citizenship.

“I got very mad about that, to put it mildly, so I put, I had a couple of medals, I put my uniform, I put everything in a box,” Mathews says.

Out of sight, out of mind. He adds, “I had hangover from Vietnam. I was drinking a lot. After that, I was actually homeless for about six weeks. Shortly after that, I met my wife, Christine.”

Support groups and resources for Vietnam veterans:

They raised children and decades passed. The 100-page diary remained mostly hidden away — its owner unknown, its writings untranslated.

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Until he spotted something familiar at a client’s home — it was a typical Vietnamese hat. Mathews asked the man if he knew someone who could translate the diary, then the writing came to life.

“This is a poem that he wrote, and it tells you about his devotion to Ho Chi Minh, how he adored him, how he loved the Communist Party, how he hated American soldiers, of course,” Mathews reads.

Another poem read, “It’s a beautiful country. Mountains, birds, singing, waiting for spring but sleeping with a gun.”

A few translations offered a few insights, but he still had no idea who it belonged to. It turned out, the answer was there all along. They discovered a page with the owner’s name and address, and those of his family as well.

“I knew I was gonna give it back to them, whatever it had to take. I was determined,” Mathews said, adding he chokes up at the emotion of the day.

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A story of his search appeared in a local online article, which eventually got the attention of the Vietnamese government. Within days, the soldier’s family learned of the news.

Mathews remembers, “I got a call. It was about 3 o’clock in the morning to turn on my iPhone, and I could watch them for the first time, they were shown pictures of the book.”

Mathews’ and his wife were on a plane to Vietnam within a month. News of the diary’s return made headlines. Dozens of journalists waited at the airport. The attention caught Mathews by surprise, as did the warm welcome from the surviving sisters and nephew.

Mathews recalls the moment he actually handed the diary over to the owner’s family, “like I handed over a cinder block,” adding, “It felt light once I gave it to her.”

The owner of the diary was Cao Van Tuat, just 21 years old. His body was never recovered. His family was left with nothing to remember him, not even a picture.

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Mathews’ gift of the diary gave them something more than a memory to hold on to, but still, he said it was hard to let go. He made copies of the pages that fill a binder, and he still looks at them from time to time.

He read another entry about a girlfriend, “how he loved her and how he mentioned he was going to ask for hand when he returned.” He says that girlfriend is now 80 years old, but she never married.

Mathews also reflects on the beauty of diary, saying, “How on Earth can a person be a soldier fighting a war in the terrain like that with limited resources and create still, take time out to create something this fascinating and beautiful?”

He says this experience changed him.

“My children are happy because they have read and heard about things they didn’t know anything about because of me not talking about it,” Mathews said.

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Mathews still has dreams about the war and memories he hasn’t yet shared, but there are also new memories of his return visit, holding hands with the sister of a soldier once considered the enemy. Time changes perception, and perhaps time, for both families, to heal old wounds of war.

But he says after all of this, he has found some peace, saying, “It’s a fairytale ending after all these years.”



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New Jersey

Live N.J. power outage tracker: Strong thunderstorms, fierce winds cut power to thousands of homes

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Live N.J. power outage tracker: Strong thunderstorms, fierce winds cut power to thousands of homes


Strong thunderstorms that have pelted parts of New Jersey with heavy rain and strong winds have knocked out power to thousands of homes and businesses across the state, with forecasters calling for a threat of additional thunderstorms popping up through late Sunday night.

NJ.com’s Power Outage Tracker, which monitors outage numbers from utility companies in the region, showed about 12,000 homes and businesses in New Jersey without power as of 6 p.m. Sunday.

Forecasters from the National Weather Service had predicted a cold front would move across New Jersey on Sunday, interacting with hot and humid air, which could trigger intense thunderstorms with damaging winds as strong as 60 mph.

Eighteen of the state’s 21 counties are under a severe thunderstorm watch until 7 p.m. Sunday, and three counties — Atlantic, Cape May and Cumberland — are under a severe thunderstorm watch through 11 p.m. Sunday. Several thunderstorm warnings and flash flood warnings have also been posted.

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Forecasters say they can’t rule out the possibility of an isolated tornado forming during the intense thunderstorms because of the high humidity and wind shear in the atmosphere.

On Wednesday night, New Jersey was rocked by strong thunderstorms that toppled trees and snapped power lines in numerous towns and cities, knocking out power to more than 100,000 homes and businesses across the state.

Those storms turned out to be deadly, with a large tree falling on a 30-year-old man in East Orange, killing him, according to local police.

Latest power outage numbers

Note: If you are unable to see the outage numbers on your device, click here.

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Thank you for relying on us to provide the local news you can trust. Please consider supporting NJ.com with a voluntary subscription.

Len Melisurgo may be reached at LMelisurgo@njadvancemedia.com or on X at @LensReality.





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After poor debate performance, Biden appeals to donors at N.J. Gov. Murphy's home

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After poor debate performance, Biden appeals to donors at N.J. Gov. Murphy's home


In the aftermath of that debate, Biden flashed more vigor in speeches in North Carolina and New York on Friday, saying he believes with “all my heart and soul” that he can do the job of the presidency.

The Biden campaign said it has raised more than $27 million on Thursday and Friday, including $3 million at a New York City fundraiser focused on the LGBTQ+ community.

Jill Biden told supporters Friday that he said to her after the debate, “You know, Jill, I don’t know what happened. I didn’t feel that great.” The first lady then said she responded to him, “Look, Joe, we are not going to let 90 minutes define the four years that you’ve been president.”

The Democratic president still needs to allay the fears stirred by the debate as it seeped into the public conscience with clips and memes spreading on the internet and public pressure for him to bow out of the race.

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Democratic donors across New York, Southern California and Silicon Valley privately expressed deep concerns about the viability of Biden’s campaign in the wake of his debate performance.

In a series of text message chains and private conversations, they discussed the short list of possible replacements, a group that included Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer, California Gov. Gavin Newsom and Vice President Kamala Harris.

But on Friday, there was no formal push to pressure Biden to step aside and some suspected there never would be given the logistical challenges associated with replacing the presumptive nominee just four months before Election Day.

Some donors noted they were going to pause their personal giving. They said receipts from Biden’s weekend fundraiser would almost certainly be strong because the tickets were sold and paid for before the debate.

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New Jersey woman was warned about 'strange' ex-boyfriend before murder, dad says

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New Jersey woman was warned about 'strange' ex-boyfriend before murder, dad says


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When Stephanie Parze’s father learned his daughter was missing, he immediately had one suspect in mind — her ex-boyfriend.

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“I didn’t like this person from the day I met him,” Ed Parze told Fox News Digital. “There wasn’t ever any eye contact with this guy. He was in and out. I even said to my daughter, ‘I’m not liking this. You’ve got to be careful with him.’ He was strange. I had a gut feeling from day one. … I just said, ‘It’s him.’”

The case of the New Jersey-based makeup artist is being explored in Investigation Discovery’s (ID) true-crime series, “Deadly Influence.” It delves into the underbelly of social media, exploring the dark reality of toxic online communities.

NEW YORK TEEN’S MURDER PHOTOS WENT VIRAL, PROMPTING MOM TO HELP CHANGE LAW: ‘CAN’T LET THAT PICTURE BE ONLINE’

Stephanie Parze was a social media influencer and makeup artist based in New Jersey. (Investigation Discovery)

“I’m speaking out because we need to get the awareness out so that this doesn’t happen to anybody else,”  Ed said. “It also keeps Stephanie alive.”

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Ed described his daughter as a 4-foot-11 “firecracker” who had a passion for artistry. She quickly developed a following on social media.

“I didn’t realize that she had an influence on social media like she did until after the incident,” Ed admitted. “I knew she was doing things on social media and putting some art out there. She would always send me stuff, and I thought it was amazing. But I didn’t realize how fast it took for her to build a following.”

A close-up of Ed Parze speaking a camera crew.

Ed Parze, the father of Stephanie Parze, spoke out in the ID true-crime series “Deadly Influence.” (Investigation Discovery)

It was on an online dating site where Parze met John Ozbilgen, a stockbroker from New Jersey who worked on Staten Island, said Ed. The pair interacted on social media before hitting it off in person.

“It was very quick,” Ed recalled.

But the union was tumultuous. According to the series, Parze accused Ozbilgen of assault. She wanted to end the relationship.

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A screenshot of a selfie taken by Stephanie Parze for her Instagram.

According to the series, Stephanie Parze met John Ozbilgen on a dating site. (Investigation Discovery)

Ed said he initially tried to warn his daughter about getting involved with Ozbilgen, 29.

“She would say, ‘Give him a chance, he’s shy. Once you get to know him, you’ll like him,’” said Ed. “What do you say to that? You have my 25-year-old independent, strong daughter. She knows what she’s doing. You would hope that you’re proven wrong. But I still had that gut feeling. And then my gut feeling was right.”

Parze was last seen Oct. 30, 2019. She left her parents’ home after a night out with relatives. She then drove back to her late grandmother’s nearby home but then failed to show up for a nanny job the next day. Her car and phone were discovered at the property, but there was no sign of forced entry.

A screenshot of Stephanie Parzes Instagram where shes displaying her blue hair.

According to the series, Stephanie Parze was killed Oct. 31, 2019. (Investigation Discovery)

“Stephanie only lived about six minutes from here,” said Ed. “She always called and texted whenever she got home. But when 25 minutes went by, and we didn’t hear anything, we immediately knew something was wrong.”

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Parze’s mother called her daughter frantically but got no answer. Ed had hoped that his daughter, likely tired from the evening’s festivities, put her phone on silent and went to bed. But still, he felt uneasy.

“If you blew her phone up, she would call you immediately,” said Ed. “We went to bed that night not knowing what happened. The next morning, we still didn’t get that phone call. We then went over to the house. … We couldn’t find her at all. Nobody had seen her. And that started the search.”

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Volunteers holding hands with a banner that reads bring Steph home

The Parze family holds a rally at Freehold Township High School to keep the “Bring Steph Home” effort going. Several volunteers stepped in to search for her. (Imagn)

Parze’s family organized a search party to find the influencer. More than 100 volunteers, many of them online followers, stepped in to help.

“I used to go on Facebook every night and just start putting posts out there,” said Ed. “More and more people came forward wanting to help. It pulled at my heartstrings. … I didn’t realize how far these posts had reached out to people. … Many people just recognized Stephanie from her face and being online all the time.”

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Ozbilgen was eyed by investigators as a person of interest. According to the series, they discovered he sent Parze 10 angry, unanswered text messages the night before she vanished. 

John Ozbilgen in a jumpsuit with handcuffs.

John Ozbilgen, the ex-boyfriend of Stephanie Parze, arrives at State Superior Court in Freehold Nov. 19, 2019.  (Thomas P. Costello/Asbury Park Press/Imagn)

On Nov. 8, 2019, Ozbilgen was arrested and charged with one count of third-degree endangering the welfare of a child — possession of child pornography, the Monmouth County Prosecutors Office said in a statement. Images were found on his phone as authorities investigated Parze’s disappearance. He remained in custody until Nov. 19, when he was released.

On Nov. 22, 2019, Ozbilgen died by suicide. While he was never charged in Parze’s disappearance, he left behind a note indicating he was responsible for killing her.

Ed said he received an anonymous phone call that day. All he heard was, “He’s dead. He hung himself.” The mysterious caller hung up.

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A missing sign for Stephanie Parze

Ed Parze said he “went nuts” after learning John Ozbilgen, a person of interest in the disappearance of his daughter Stephanie Parze, died by suicide. (Imagn)

“I went nuts,” said Ed. “I lost myself. I was punching walls. I was throwing stuff. I was screaming. I was going crazy because, in my mind, he’s the only one who knows where she is. I got in my car. I went to his house, which was only about three minutes away. 

“I was met there by a detective who took me out of there. … But I put up a fight. I said, ‘I gotta know. Is this true? Is there anything left behind? Are there any notes? … Somebody has to know something.’ [The detective] said, ‘Yes, it’s true. He’s gone. He did hang himself, but we can’t tell you anything else.’”

A tribute to Stephanie Parze outside her familys home.

A tribute to Stephanie Parze outside her family’s home.  (Imagn)

“There were two notes,” Ed said. “But nobody still didn’t know where she was. We were going to continue the search until we found her.”

In the note to his parents, Ozbilgen “said he had enough and that he could not do life in prison” and that what his parents would hear in the news “was true except for the charges of child pornography,” said Monmouth County Prosecutor Christopher Gramiccioni. Ozbilgen also wrote that he had “dug himself a deep hole” and that “this was the only choice.”

An aerial shot of Old Bridge in New Jersey

Investigators near the site in Old Bridge, where the body of Stephanie Parze was found. (Imagn)

In January 2020, human remains were discovered in Old Bridge by two teenagers walking south along Route 9. Authorities confirmed it was Stephanie. Due to the state of decomposition, authorities were unable to determine how Parze was killed, according to reports.

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Ed’s work wasn’t over even after Stephanie was laid to rest. On his daughter’s birthday that year, he founded The Stephanie Nicole Parze Foundation. It aims to “provide education, intervention and support to families and individuals dealing with domestic violence, sexual abuse and missing loved ones.”

CALIFORNIA MOM WHO FAKED KIDNAPPING ACTS LIKE HOAX ‘NEVER EXISTED’ AS ‘BLINDSIDED’ HUSBAND BREAKS SILENCE

Stephanie Parzes casket being carried by several men.

Stephanie Parze’s casket is carried from St. Rose of Lima Catholic Church in Freehold Jan. 31, 2020. (Imagn)

“We want to save lives and prevent this from happening to other people,” said Ed. “We’ve gone from six members to 128. Right now, we cover the whole state of New Jersey. … We have about 13 different programs that we offer to the public … from self-defense classes to alarm systems. We’re trying to get legislation passed for Stephanie’s Law, which would establish a publicly accessible domestic violence registry.”

A side-view of Ed Parze sitting in front of a camera crew.

Ed Parze founded The Stephanie Nicole Parze Foundation to keep his late daughter’s legacy alive. (Investigation Discovery)

Today, Ed hopes Parze’s story will encourage other parents to be as vigilant as possible with their children.

“I always tell students, ‘Love is blind,’” said Ed. “It’s an old cliché, but there’s truth to it. You don’t know what’s happening to you because you’re blind to it. You don’t realize you’re being manipulated. You don’t realize that the person’s controlling you, and they’re isolating you from your friends and family. But your friends will see it. Your siblings will see it. Your parents will know it.

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A screenshot from Stephanie Parzes Instagram displaying her makeup skills.

“Love is blind,” Stephanie Parze’s father Ed told Fox News Digital. (Investigation Discovery)

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“If you’re going through something, don’t hide from your loved ones,” said Ed. “Tell somebody what’s going on in your life, especially if you break up with someone. Make sure you tell somebody that you’ve broken up with somebody because you don’t know what’s in the other person’s head at that point. The most dangerous part is during the breakup. That’s when people are the most vulnerable. That’s when most of the murders happen.”

“Deadly Influence” airs July 1 at 9 p.m. The Associated Press contributed to this report.





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