Lifestyle
L.A. Affairs: I was on a date with my husband when I spotted a guy who was just my type
The light was low at the Echo as Elliot Moss started playing his new single. The distortion kicked in, and my jaw dropped. It was a departure for someone I typically describe as an electronic music singer-songwriter. I was there on a date with my husband. We loved the new sound.
I was holding my husband’s hand when I looked to my right and saw a guy who caught my attention.
He was so focused on the stage that he never noticed me. He was at the show by himself, and I desperately wanted to start a conversation. I’m polyamorous; my husband and I date and have relationships with others, so a conversation wouldn’t have been out of the question. Despite several attempts, I couldn’t even catch his eye. After a few more songs, I realized that I had to take a risk and give him my number. The regret of wondering what if would have been too strong.
As a courtesy, I asked my husband if I could slip someone my number. He looked around and instantly identified the recipient. After six years of polyamory, he knew my types. This recipient was my tall, nerdy, earnest type. I couldn’t take my eyes off him.
The bar sold popcorn, so I asked for a bag and fetched a pen out of my purse. On a torn piece of paper I wrote, “You have great taste in music. I’m not single, but I’m available,” and I left my number. Despite trying to catch his eye all night, I was suddenly nervous, my heart pounding out of my chest. I’d only ever given one person my number, and it led to a rather mediocre date.
As I approached him, I suddenly wanted to hide. Earlier I had tried to catch his eye, but now I couldn’t stand to feel the weight of his gaze. I tapped his shoulder, gave him the folded note and immediately ran to the restroom. At 42, I felt like a nervous teenager. There was just one song left. I didn’t see him as I walked out.
An hour later, he texted. “Thanks for your kind note. That was quick, I couldn’t really catch a vibe.” We started to chat. I shared my dating profile, but he wasn’t on the apps. He was curious but just getting out of a relationship. Not single, not available.
Soon, his status changed: single, but still not available, working through a breakup. We kept in touch. I wasn’t in a rush. All the texting only added to the feeling of being a teenager, the anticipation building.
As we started talking about a first date, I admitted to already planning multiple dates with him in my head. The Museum of Jurassic Technology in Culver City was the perfect place for me to gauge just how weird someone was. Or maybe one of my favorite L.A. dates: the Broad followed by Angels Flight to dinner at Grand Central Market. I also had a surprise date option: something he would have to trust me on — no hints. He chose the surprise date. I beamed at my phone; he was also adventurous.
I told him to buy a bottle of Pinot Grigio that we might not drink. “I need to ask a Virgo question: Will you have glasses for us?”
“It doesn’t matter if I have glasses.”
“If we drink it, it does matter!”
I asked him to trust me.
I picked him up at 5:30 p.m. Having talked about our shared feminist identities before the date, I opened the car door for him. He blushed, realizing how nice it felt. He had brought two bottles, so we could choose. I did not bring glasses.
I pointed my Prius toward Echo Park. When I started driving into the neighborhood, his curiosity piqued; he’d never been up the hill before.
We parked and found “Phantasma Gloria” by Randlett King Lawrence, an artist who uses the sun and vessels filled with water as his medium, turning his entire yard into an object lesson of how our perception of reality is subject to change with a simple shift of perspective. Randy warmly welcomed us, generously offering to share the bottle of Pinot Grigio with us using his own glasses.
Following dinner at Bacetti, we planned two more dates for that week. I also invited him to a polyamorous meetup I was hosting in downtown L.A. He accepted. My heart fluttered; he already wanted to be a part of my life. He already wanted to meet my people. He felt as strongly about me as I felt about him.
The second date felt as easy as the first.
When I wrote to confirm our third date, he canceled.
When I wrote to confirm the meetup, he declined.
It stung. It felt like it was over even more quickly than it began. Polyamory is not a relationship orientation or style that is best for everyone. He was curious, but maybe it wasn’t right for him. Or maybe I wasn’t right for him.
The night of our canceled date, the Annenberg Community Beach House was having an ambient electronic concert. Underwater speakers were placed in the heated pool. I paid $10, slipped into the water, closed my eyes and floated on my back listening to Colloboh play. As the sun dipped farther down the horizon, I walked upstairs and meditated to a sound bath.
In that moment, enveloped in sound, I tried to let go of my attachment to the relationship that was not meant to be — to let those other imagined dates sit unscheduled. As the crystal bowls sang over the waves of the Pacific, I realized that perhaps the most important dates to plan were the ones that I planned for myself.
The author works in higher education and lives with her family in Pasadena. She hasn’t given up on finding love again and again and again. She’s on Instagram: @valinda.weeee
L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.
Lifestyle
‘American Classic’ is a hidden gem that gets even better as it goes
Kevin Kline plays actor Richard Bean, and Laura Linney is his sister-in-law Kristen, in American Classic.
David Giesbrecht/MGM+
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David Giesbrecht/MGM+
American Classic is a hidden gem, in more ways than one. It’s hidden because it’s on MGM+, a stand-alone streaming service that, let’s face it, most people don’t have. But MGM+ is available without subscription for a seven-day free trial, on its website or through Prime Video and Roku. And you should find and watch American Classic, because it’s an absolutely charming and wonderful TV jewel.
Charming, in the way it brings small towns and ordinary people to life, as in Northern Exposure. Wonderful, in the way it reflects the joys of local theater productions, as in Slings & Arrows, and the American Playhouse production of Kurt Vonnegut’s Who Am I This Time?
The creators of American Classic are Michael Hoffman and Bob Martin. Martin co-wrote and co-created Slings & Arrows, so that comparison comes easily. And back in the early 1980s, Who Am I This Time? was about people who transformed onstage from ordinary citizens into extraordinary performers. It’s a conceit that works only if you have brilliant actors to bring it to life convincingly. That American Playhouse production had two young actors — Christopher Walken and Susan Sarandon — so yes, it worked. And American Classic, with its mix of veteran and young actors, does, too.

American Classic begins with Kevin Kline, as Shakespearean actor Richard Bean, confronting a New York Times drama critic about his negative opening-night review of Richard’s King Lear. The next day, Richard’s agent, played by Tony Shalhoub, calls Richard in to tell him his tantrum was captured by cellphone and went viral, and that he has to lay low for a while.
Richard returns home to the small town of Millersburg, Pa., where his parents ran a local theater. Almost everyone we meet is a treasure. His father, who has bouts of dementia, is played by Len Cariou, who starred on Broadway in Sweeney Todd. Richard’s brother, Jon, is played by Jon Tenney of The Closer, and his wife, Kristen, is played by the great Laura Linney, from Ozark and John Adams.
Things get even more complicated because the old theater is now a dinner theater, filling its schedule with performances by touring regional companies. Its survival is at risk, so Richard decides to save the theater by mounting a new production of Thornton Wilder’s Our Town, casting the local small-town residents to play … local small-town residents.
Miranda, Richard’s college-bound niece, continues the family theatrical tradition — and Nell Verlaque, the young actress who plays her, has a breakout role here. She’s terrific — funny, touching, totally natural. And when she takes the stage as Emily in Our Town, she’s heart-wrenching. Playwright Wilder is served magnificently here — and so is William Shakespeare, whose works and words Kline tackles in more than one inspirational scene in this series.
I don’t want to reveal too much about the conflicts, and surprises, in American Classic, but please trust me: The more episodes you watch, the better it gets. The characters evolve, and go in unexpected directions and pairings. Kline’s Richard starts out thinking about only himself, but ends up just the opposite. And if, as Shakespeare wrote, the play’s the thing, the thing here is, the plays we see, and the soliloquies we hear, are spellbinding.
And there’s plenty of fun to be had outside the classics in American Classic. The table reads are the most delightful since the ones in Only Murders in the Building. The dinner-table arguments are the most explosive since the ones in The Bear. Some scenes are take-your-breath-away dramatic. Others are infectiously silly, as when Richard works with a cast member forced upon him by the angel of this new Our Town production.
Take the effort to find, and watch, American Classic. It’ll remind you why, when it’s this good, it’s easy to love the theater. And television.


Lifestyle
The L.A. coffee shop is for wearing Dries Van Noten head to toe
The ritual of meeting up and hanging out at a coffee shop in L.A. is a showcase of style filled with a subtle site-specific tension. Don’t you see it? Comfort battles formality fighting to break free. Hiding out chafes against being perceived. In the end, we make ourselves at home at all costs — and pull a look while doing it.
It’s the morning after a night out. Two friends meet up at Chainsaw in Melrose Hill, the cafe with the flan lattes, crispy arepas and sorbet-colored wall everybody and their mom has been talking about.
Miraculously, the line of people that usually snakes down Melrose yearning for a slice of chef Karla Subero Pittol’s passion lime fruit icebox pie is nonexistent today. Thank God, because the party was sick last night — the DJ mixed Nelly Furtado’s “Promiscuous” into Peaches’ “F— the Pain Away” and the walls were sweating — so making it to the cafe’s front door alone is like wading through viscous, knee-high water. Senses dull and blunt in that special way where it feels like your brain is wearing a weighted vest. The sun, an oppressor. Caffeine needed via IV drip.
The mood: “Don’t look at me,” as they look around furtively, still waking up. “But wait, do. I’m wearing the new Dries Van Noten from head to toe.”
Daniel, left, wears Dries Van Noten mac, henley, pants, oxford shoes, necklace and socks. Sirena wears Dries Van Noten blouse, micro shorts, sneakers, shell charm necklace, cuff and bag and Los Angeles Apparel socks.
If a fit is fire and no one is around to see it, does it make a sound? A certain kind of L.A. coffee shop is (blessedly) one of the few everyday runways we have, followed up by the Los Feliz post office and the Alvarado Car Wash in Echo Park. We come to a coffee shop like Chainsaw for strawberry matchas the color of emeralds and rubies and crackling papas fritas that come with a tamarind barbecue sauce so good it may as well be categorized as a Schedule 1. But we stay for something else.
There is a game we play at the L.A. coffee shop. We’re all in on it — the deniers especially. It can best be summed up by that mood: “Don’t look at me. But wait, do.” Do. Do. Do. Do. We go to a coffee shop to see each other, to be seen. And we pretend we’re not doing it. How cute. Yes, I’m peering at you from behind my hoodie and my sunglasses but the hoodie is a niche L.A. brand and the glasses are vintage designer. I wore them just for you. One time I was sitting at what is to me amazing and to some an insufferable coffee shop in the Arts District where a regular was wearing a headpiece made entirely of plastic sunglasses that covered every inch of his face — at least a foot long in all directions — jangling with every movement he made. Respect, I thought.
Dries Van Noten’s spring/summer 2026 collection feels so right in a place like this. The women’s show, titled “Wavelength,” is about “balancing hard and soft, stiff and fluid, casual and refined, simple and complex,” writes designer Julian Klausner in the show notes. While for the men’s show, titled “A Perfect Day,” Klausner contextualizes: “A man in love, on a stroll at the beach at dawn, after a party. Shirt unbuttoned, sleeves rolled up, the silhouette takes on a new life. I asked myself: What is formal? What is casual? How do these feel?” What is formal or casual? How do you balance hard and soft? The L.A. coffee shop is a container for this spectrum. A dynamic that works because of the tension. A master class in this beautiful dance. There is no more fitting place to wear the SS26 Dries beige tuxedo jacket with heather gray capri sweats and pink satin boxing boots, no better audience for the floor-length striped sheer gown worn with satin sneakers — because even though no one will bat an eye, you trust that your contribution has been clocked and appreciated.
Daniel wears Dries Van Noten coat, shorts, sneakers and socks. Sirena wears Dries Van Noten jacket, micro shorts and sneakers.
Back at Chainsaw the friends drink their iced lattes, they eat their beautiful chocolate milk tres leches in a coupe. They’re revived — buzzing, even; at the glorious point in the caffeinated beverage where everything is beautiful, nothing hurts and at least one of them feels like a creative genius. The longer they stay, the more their style reveals itself. Before they were flexing in a secret way. Now they’re just flexing. Looking back at you looking at them, the contract understood. Doing it for the show. Wait, when did they change? How long have they been here? It doesn’t matter. They have all day. Time ceases to exist in a place like this.
Daniel wears Dries Van Noten tuxedo coat, pants, scarf, sneakers and necklace and Hanes tank top. Sirena wears Dries Van Noten jacket, micro shorts, sneakers and socks.
Creative direction Julissa James
Photography and video direction Alejandra Washington
Styling Keyla Marquez
Hair and makeup Jaime Diaz
Cinematographer Joshua D. Pankiw
1st AC Ruben Plascencia
Gaffer Luis Angel Herrera
Production Mere Studios
Styling assistant Ronben
Production assistant Benjamin Turner
Models Sirena Warren, Daniel Aguilera
Location Chainsaw
Special thanks Kevin Silva and Miguel Maldonado from Next Management
Lifestyle
Nature needs a little help in the inventive Pixar movie ‘Hoppers’ : Pop Culture Happy Hour
Piper Curda as Mabel in Hoppers.
Disney
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In Disney and Pixar’s delightful new film Hoppers, a young woman (Piper Curda) learns a beloved glade is under threat from the town’s slimy mayor (Jon Hamm). But luckily, she discovers that her college professor has developed technology that can let her live as one of the critters she loves – by allowing her mind to “hop” into an animatronic beaver. And it just might just allow her to help save the glade from serious risk of destruction.
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