Looking back 39 years to October of 1985, I finally completed my studies for the certified financial planner certification and was itching to share my knowledge with others. Having just completed almost three years of coursework where I was often the only female in the room, I decided to learn more about why there were not more women in finance. This revealed a myriad of other issues that to this day continue to plague women preparing for retirement. I set off to teach classes at the local library and start writing a finance column for this newspaper to empower others to be financially prepared for an unknown future.

Fast forward to the present day, and I come across a recent UBS study that states 85% of high-net-worth women across every generation still tend to leave long-term financial decisions to their male counterparts.¹ This includes women running businesses, households and managing daily finances for themselves and their families, often spanning three generations.

Early in my career, I studied the different investment styles by gender, which helped me significantly when working with couples who were not always on the same page. I was able to give them permission to think about money differently, because it often means different things depending on if you are the rainmaker or the caretaker. Being on a career track myself, as well as a wife and mother and, yes, daughter, I too was juggling three generations along with both my and my husband’s businesses. I get it: There is not enough time in the day, and you must prioritize.

Gender differences proved fascinating in learning about the hunter-gatherer versus the nurturer. Even though we don’t live in caves anymore and women and men equally have successful careers, those nurturing or hunting instincts never go away. Therefore (and what I love about my husband), men always seem willing to run faster, work harder and do whatever it takes to succeed, in my opinion. This hunter mentality is often mirrored in the male’s investment style. This may include switching out of investments prematurely if they are not performing or always looking for another advantage. Women are more likely to want a plan and be loyal to it for long periods of time before making changes. Both types of investing have their pros and cons.

The female’s nurturing character and the juggling act often left her career or her self-needs last on the priority list. This can equate to lower Social Security due to an erratic work life or time off to stay at home with children or parents — or even following the hunter-gatherer around the globe for his career.

Women and their family members need to know that pensions and Social Security may be lower than those of their male counterparts, and investments may be more conservative. Women also tend to live longer, therefore needing more money. Married women with families may have had less of an opportunity to fund a 401(k) plan, especially if they worked part-time for a while or earned lower wages. It is important to plan well considering these circumstances.

It is crucial to meet with an adviser and start your retirement plan if any of this information sounds familiar for you or someone you know. Education is key, and taking action is now a priority to prepare for the future.

1 “Women Put Financial Security at Risk by Deferring Long-Term Financial Decisions to Spouses,” March 2019. UBS.

Patricia Kummer is a managing director for Mariner Wealth Advisors.

Related

Wealth isn’t about what you can see, but what you can’t. While it’s easy to assume that someone driving a luxury car or wearing designer clothes is financially successful, according to experts, wealth often lies in what isn’t visible — savings, investments and financial security.

GOBankingRates spoke with Dennis Shirshikov, head of growth at GoSummer and professor of finance at City University of New York, as well as Mafe Aclado, finance expert and general manager of Coupon Snake, to discuss why you can’t judge wealth by appearance.

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High-Spending Habits Can Mask Financial Instability

“I’ve seen clients who lived very modestly but had substantial retirement accounts, real estate investments and portfolios,” said Shirshikov.

On the flip side, he said there are individuals who appear wealthy but are actually over-leveraged.

“These are the clients who may have an expensive lifestyle but rely heavily on credit and are often just one financial setback away from a crisis.”

Many of the Wealthiest People Practice ‘Stealth Wealth’

One of the more interesting aspects of working with affluent clients, according to Shirshikov, is discovering how many of them actively downplay their wealth.

“They drive regular cars, live in modest homes and avoid flashy purchases,” he said.

This concept, known as “stealth wealth,” is about avoiding the trappings of luxury and focusing instead on long-term financial goals.

“A prime example is a client who made millions through real estate investments but maintained a frugal lifestyle to ensure they could continue building generational wealth. For them, financial success was about freedom and security, not outward appearances.”

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Financial Success Often Comes From Discipline, Not Appearance

Experts emphasize that real wealth is built through financial discipline — consistently saving, investing and living within your means.

“I’ve noticed that some of the wealthiest individuals I’ve worked with never focused on appearing rich; they were focused on the long game,” Shirshikov said. “One client, who retired early with significant assets, told me they always resisted the pressure to ‘keep up with the Joneses.’”

His advice to younger generations? “Focus on making your money work for you, not on looking like you have more than you do.”

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Aclado has observed the same. “The No. 1 reason why you can’t judge wealth by appearance is the fact that when it comes to how to spend their money, people have different priorities. While some may be more interested in keeping up with the Joneses, staying in touch with the latest fashion trend and owning the latest cars, others may have more ambitious desires.”

And for these groups of individuals with intense financial ambitions, she said lifestyle inflation is one of the things they consciously guard against.

“Not because they cannot afford more comfort or luxuries, but because they would rather plant their money in investments that would yield more profits in the future.”

The Wealthy Play the Long Game

According to Aclado, these individuals are also more likely to play the long game; that is, they choose to become strategically patient when it comes to spending and managing their money.

“And they focus on long-term goals like building generational wealth and prioritizing financial sustainability as opposed to seeking instant gratification,” Aclado said.

Living Frugally Isn’t an Attractive Option for Many

“There is also the fact that some people — especially when in their 20s — honestly believe that they still have enough time, and can therefore afford to be financially indulgent,” Aclado said.

She explained that with social media influence, fast fashion and today’s intense spending culture, people’s outward appearance can’t really be trusted as a sign that they are financially successful.

“Because today, living frugally isn’t exactly an attractive option, even when its benefits are clearly visible.”

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This article originally appeared on GOBankingRates.com: I’m a Financial Planner: Here’s Why You Can’t Judge Wealth by Appearance