Lifestyle
L.A. Affairs: He was a perfect gentleman. Homeowner. Father. Film producer … and ex-con?
If you had asked me to go on a date with someone who was barely out of prison, my answer would be an immediate no. I am not someone with Bonnie and Clyde syndrome, and I have never initiated anything with a known ex-con. My dad used to make fun of me for being someone who sticks to rules — almost to a fault. I hated when he double parked or ignored posted signs.
Then I met Mr. Hollywood on a dating app.
As I get older, using dating apps puts me in a smaller and smaller mating pool. Most men my age or younger date younger or are married and looking for something on the side. I’m a health food-eating meditator who is rather arty. I have not made a fortune yet, and I want to find a partner, not a paramour.
I’m not everyone’s style. Men no longer look at me as a woman to mold. They just see that I don’t drink, don’t smoke and have aged out of being a pinup.
I was intrigued by Mr. Hollywood. He was cute. He had a nice profile that depicted a clean-cut, slightly geeky guy. He was more computer tech than Miami drug dealer. His profile showed that he relished the outdoors, was a fit runner, enjoyed films and had homes in two states. His kids liked him, and he looked kind.
When he sent a rose my way, I thought, why not meet him? We texted, then talked, so I was fairly sure he was not catfishing me — that’s so common now on dating apps. He immediately asked me to dinner. That was different. Almost no one did that. Coffee, sure. A walk, maybe. Committing to an early evening out felt good. It had been a long time since anyone had asked. I said yes.
Then he sent me something to read.
“See if you still want to meet me after you read this,” he said. I was a tad reticent to click a link. Potential scammers on LinkedIn have sent me private messages with URLs to jobs that may or may not have been real. (I generally delete them instead of finding out.) So why would I trust a link from a random guy I’d interacted with only on my phone?
Instead, I searched his name and the headline of the article and easily found what I was looking for. He had been in prison for selling drugs. He had been in prison for selling drugs. The article definitely sided with Mr. Hollywood and his business partner. It said, in so many words, they had been wrongly accused of being “kingpins” and did not deserve their 20-year sentences. Well, I thought, this won’t be a boring dinner. I’d like to hear his story.
He set the date for the first night he’d be back in L.A., and I gave him a few restaurant ideas. He picked one close to me in Santa Monica. That was nice. I could walk there.
I learned that he found out he was autistic in middle age but always thought he was neurodivergent, even if that term was not yet in the zeitgeist. I found him to be charming. He pulled my chair out for me and was the right amount of interested. He was the perfect gentleman, along with having a Hollywood producer cool. Producing movies was his passion; selling drugs allegedly made him a lot of money to pursue it.
He loved his dinner. The conversation flowed. He sneaked in “I’m not a good person” so innocuously that the old me would have overlooked it. Current me heard it like a Rebound ringtone.
Prior to dinner, I would have thought that sentence was his wounded self, which needed love and attention to heal. I was raised by a sweet henpecked father, who would have said something disparaging about himself to get me to help him with his computer or read tiny print. I used to rush in, taking on the helper role because it offered warmth and a modicum of love. That pattern never worked in relationships and was exactly what I wasn’t looking for.
But the sentence went by fast, and he seemed genuinely interested in perhaps working together. He even said during dinner something like, “I’m feeling like we’ve got a collaborating-on-work vibe more than romance going here.”
I agreed. But then, he said that he was feeling a lot of attraction for me. It was nice to hear. The flattery was quickly flattened. He divulged that he could be going back to prison soon. He had another court date coming up.
As the date ended, he made sure I would be OK getting home on my own and asked me to send him a specific script I’d written, which doubled as the “Yes, I did get home safely” text. I later looked up more information to see what I might have missed about him. Other than a couple of giant red flags, our dinner was a fun date — something I haven’t had in far too long. Instead of being disappointed, I felt more hopeful about dating in general.
I sent him the script, and he responded he’d read it soon. I followed up a couple of weeks later, and he said he was woefully behind. Unlike men I had gone out with, the ones who strung me along knowing we were not couple material, he simply never contacted me again.
I didn’t feel rejected. I felt like he gently slipped away after a nice dinner. His approach wasn’t criminal. It was closer to heroic. I hope he finds a Bonnie to his Clyde and lives a long and happy life.
The author has written live-action scripts and animation. She lives in Los Angeles.
L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.
Lifestyle
Hailey Bieber Poses For Sexy Selfies In New Luscious Lip Thirst Traps
Hailey Bieber
These Luscious Lips Don’t Lie … I’m Freaking Hot!!!
Published
Hailey Bieber is feeling herself … because she whipped out her camera and took a bunch of stunning selfies, and now she’s sharing them with the world.
Check out this new thirst traps from the model and makeup mogul … Hailey’s got a face made for the front camera … and those lips can do all the talking!
Hailey posted four photos on Instagram of her face and upper body in a cute, red & black, polka dot top and captioned the post, “clean the front camera. xx.”
Justin Bieber‘s wife is all glammed up for the impromptu photo shoot and is looking her best.
Hailey sold her skincare brand, Rhode, last year for a cool $1 BILLION … and her skin’s looking great here.
Lifestyle
‘Hoppers’ is delightfully unhinged and a dam good time
A young environmental activist becomes a beaver and integrates into a forest community in Pixar’s Hoppers.
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Disney/Pixar
We’re long past the days when the Pixar brand was a reliable indicator of quality, when every other year or so would bring a new masterwork on the level of The Incredibles, Ratatouille and WALL-E. In recent years, the Disney-owned animation studio has succumbed to sequelitis; I didn’t much care for Inside Out 2 or the Toy Story spinoff Lightyear, and even ostensible originals like Soul and Elemental have felt like high-concept disappointments.
So it’s a relief as well as a pleasure to recommend Pixar’s wildly entertaining new movie, Hoppers, without reservation. Directed by Daniel Chong from a script by Jesse Andrews, this eco-themed sci-fi farce may not be vintage or all-time-great Pixar. But its unhinged comic delirium is by far the liveliest thing to emerge from the company in years.
The movie stars Piper Curda as the voice of Mabel Tanaka, a plucky 19-year-old college misfit and environmental activist who lives in the woodsy suburban town of Beaverton. Mabel is more of an animal lover than a people person. She inherited a love of nature from her late grandmother, and she wants nothing more than to protect her favorite place, a forest glade.
The town’s popular mayor, Jerry — amusingly voiced by Jon Hamm — is trying to ram a highway through the area. But to Mabel’s alarm, the busy beavers who made the glade a haven for local wildlife have inexplicably vanished, and they seem to have taken all the other forest critters with them.
While investigating this disturbing situation, Mabel stumbles on a high-tech experiment that’s being conducted by her biology professor, Dr. Sam, voiced by Kathy Najimy. Dr. Sam calls the program Hoppers, because it allows a single human mind to enter, or “hop,” into the body of a robot animal, which can then pass itself off as an actual animal and communicate with real creatures in the wild.
Against Dr. Sam’s wishes, Mabel hops into the robot beaver and makes her way deep into the forest, where she hopes to convince a real beaver to return to the glade — and bring all the other animals back with it.
What Mabel discovers in the forest, though, is not at all what she expected. She encounters a community that includes birds, bunnies, racoons, a very grumpy bear and, of course, other beavers, including the friendly, somewhat naïve beaver king, George, endearingly voiced by Bobby Moynihan. (The movie takes the idea of the animal kingdom quite literally; the enormous vocal ensemble includes the late Isiah Whitlock Jr. as a royal goose, and Meryl Streep as the most imperious monarch butterfly imaginable.)
Mabel Tanaka (voiced by Piper Curda) is a plucky 19-year-old college misfit and environmental activist.
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Disney/Pixar
George has no idea that Mabel isn’t a real beaver, and he quickly takes a liking to her, even though her efforts to learn why the animals left the glade have a way of getting her and everyone into hot water.
None of this may sound too odd, especially coming just a few months after Zootopia 2. But Hoppers is just getting started; the movie gets funnier, stranger, and more surreal as it goes along. The mind-bending, body-swapping premise has obvious shades of Avatar, which Andrews’ script knowingly shouts out early on.
There are also references to classic horror films like The Birds and Jaws, and for good reason. Hoppers asks the question: What would happen if animals were fully aware of what humans have done to the planet — and suddenly in a position to do something about it? In the final stretch, the film almost becomes a body-snatcher movie, with a level of creepiness that may scare the youngest in the audience, though my 9-year-old laughed far more than she screamed.
I laughed a lot, too; Hoppers is full of funny throwaway lines and oddball non-sequiturs that I expect I’ll hear a hundred more times when it finally makes its way into our streaming rotation. The movie occasionally flirts with darkness, but even Pixar’s daring can only go so far, and its environmental advocacy ultimately lands on an unobjectionable message about how humans and animals can coexist.
That may sound conventional, but it’s borne out beautifully by Mabel and George’s unlikely friendship, which happily continues even after Mabel is no longer a beaver. There’s something fitting about that: for Pixar, Hoppers is nothing short of a return to form.

Lifestyle
How to have the best Sunday in L.A., according to Jordan Chiles
Jordan Chiles is always in motion.
The decorated gymnast and two-time Olympian recently competed in the latest season of “Dancing With the Stars,” finishing in third place alongside her partner Ezra Sosa. She’s an ambassador for brands including Nike and Hero Cosmetics. In August, she launched a mentorship program called SHERO Athlete Collective for young athletes.
And in the midst of all of that, she’s finishing up her senior year at UCLA.
In Sunday Funday, L.A. people give us a play-by-play of their ideal Sunday around town. Find ideas and inspiration on where to go, what to eat and how to enjoy life on the weekends.
“I’m happy, but I’m also sad,” the 24-year-old says about her final year as a Bruin, adding, “It’s pretty cool to know that my dream school has become my legacy.”
Chiles is also in the thick of a legal battle to reclaim the bronze medal she won, then was stripped of, at the 2024 Paris Olympics. In January, the Swiss Federal Supreme Court granted her an appeal to reexamine the matter. “I’m going to stand for what is right,” she says. “I am doing the things to make sure no other athlete has to go through what I had to go through.”
With the Olympics arriving in Los Angeles in 2028, the question of whether Chiles will participate is top of mind for many fans. Her response?
“Right now, it’s just me and my college career,” she says, flashing a bright smile. “I think right now just being able to be a part of UCLA for my last season and then seeing from there on, from April until the next year, we’ll see what happens.”
Chiles trains every day except Wednesdays and Saturdays, but on her perfect Sunday, she’d skip the gym to hang out with her dogs, take a trip to the mall and binge-watch her favorite shows.
9 a.m.: Gospel music to start the day
I feel like waking up at 9 a.m. is the perfect time because it gives you enough time in the day to do whatever, but also you didn’t wake up too early. The first thing I’d probably do aside from washing my face and brushing my teeth, is put on gospel music or listen to anything that can put my mind at ease. If I don’t have practice, then that’s typically what I’m doing, cleaning my house and starting to rejuvenate my body differently. I’d take my dogs out. I have an Aussie doodle, a teacup poodle and a maltipoo. Their names are Versace, Chanel and Dolce Gabbana. Very bougie dogs.
9:30 a.m.: Breakfast with a side of “Chicago Fire”
I’d cook for myself. I like typical scrambled eggs, bacon, avocado toast and sometimes a bagel. To get in some fruit, I’d drink some apple juice to make it feel like, “OK, this was a great, healthy breakfast.” Then I’d most likely sit on my couch and start binge-watching something. This is where lazy Jordan comes in. Like I got up, I did this, I ate, so now it’s time to relax. I’ve recently been watching all of the Chicago [shows] like “Chicago Fire,” “Chicago PD” and “Chicago Med.” I also recently started rewatching “Pretty Little Liars.”
12:30 p.m. Shop for athleisure and other goodies
This is typically when Jordan feels like she needs to go shopping. I’d put my dogs up and go to the mall. I deserve to go shop. I deserve to go splurge. I like going to the Topanga mall. I really, really like Jamba Juice and there’s one in the Topanga mall. I used to know the secret menu by heart before they started putting it on the actual menu. My go-to is the White Gummi smoothie.
I love streetwear, so if there’s sneaker stores around, I’d check that out. I sometimes end up in an Apple Store, don’t ask me how or why. It just always ends up like that. If I need to get athleisure wear, I always go to Nike. You can never have too many Nike Pros. If I need to get my eyebrows threaded or my nails done, I can do everything at the mall while I’m shopping.
4 p.m.: Time for homework
I’m heading back home so I can beat traffic and let my dogs out. I’d probably sit on my couch, scrolling on Pinterest, trying to figure out what I’m going to eat. Then I’d start doing my homework. Since I am still in college, I’d start whatever I need to do for that week. I try to stay as organized as best as I can because it is hard being a businesswoman and still being a college student. I’d probably do homework for about 2 ½ hours.
7 p.m.: Domino’s pizza and more binge-watching
I’d turn whatever show I’m watching back on, then I’d either cook or sometimes I’ll order in. It honestly depends on what Sunday it is. If it’s football Sunday, you know I have the wings and the typical Sunday vibes. But if it’s not, I might make tacos or Alfredo, or order off Uber Eats. I know this is probably crazy but I really, really, really, really love Domino’s. I am a pizza person. My Domino’s order is a small pepperoni, pineapple, olives and sausage slice … hand tossed, cheesed up, and then I will get a side of garlic knots and a side of buffalo wings with ranch.
If it’s not Domino’s, then I either will do Shake Shack or Wendy’s. I know it’s probably crazy and you’re like “Jordan, you’re an athlete,” but sometimes a girl just has to go in that direction. I like teriyaki food and hibachi places, so I’d either order from a place called Blazed N Glazed or Teriyaki Madness, or this place on campus called Hibachi Papi.
9 p.m. Video games before bed
I have an Xbox and a PlayStation, so sometimes I will go into my game room and just literally sit in my chair and play “Call of Duty” or “Halo.” Other than that, I have no night rituals. I will just make sure my dogs are fed. I always pray before I go to bed and my skincare is legit all Medicube, but I always make sure to do a face mask every other day before I go to bed.
10:30 p.m.: Prepare for an early practice
Since I probably have to wake up the next morning for an early practice, I feel like 10:30 p.m. is a good time to go to sleep. Unless I’m doing something with my friends and we don’t get back until like 11:30 p.m., but other than that, I’m in my bed or at least on my couch just relaxing.
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