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The funniest, weirdest and most niche bumper stickers seen around L.A.

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The funniest, weirdest and most niche bumper stickers seen around L.A.

Here in auto-saturated Los Angeles, the bumper sticker has always been a healthy form of self-expression. But in recent years, they’ve become far weirder than your average tourist-trap souvenir or presidential endorsement.

“This new wave of stickers,” writes Times contributor Renée Reizman, “is more concerned with cracking self-deprecating jokes or aligning with a niche fandom. There’s a bumper sticker for everybody. You can profess your love for John Cage, neon art or frogs. You can declare your other car is a poem, ask drivers not to stress out your dog or claim to be a silly goose.”

Artists, small-business owners and residents are creating highly specific bumper stickers to serve their social circles and earn some laughs. In my neck of the woods, I’ve clocked “ON A QUIET NIGHT YOU CAN HEAR MY BUICK RUST!” “DREAMS HAPPEN,” and my personal favorite, “I’D RATHER BE SLOWLY CONSUMED BY MOSS.” Alone, these stickers might make you smile, contemplate or drop your jaw. Together, they’re a mosaic of Angelenos’ collective conscious.

To celebrate the colorful little decals that keep Angelenos rubbernecking on the road, we asked locals and visitors to share their favorite bumper stickers. Here’s what they submitted.

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THICC DADS WHO VAPE FOR CHRIST

Where did you see it? “Glendale Boulevard in Atwater Village.”
What’d you like about it? “Made me stop and laugh.”

— Robert Grenader, Los Feliz

2PMFaun

Where did you see it? “101 Northbound near Melrose.”
What’d you like about it? “[It was] on a Honda Prelude. The composer Claude Debussy wrote a famous piece called “Prelude to the Afternoon of a Faun. So … Prelude 2PMFaun. Definitely a classical musician driving that one.”

— Lee Bridges, Laurel Canyon

Ben Elder's submission.

Ben Elder’s submission.

(Ben Elder)

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YOUR HONOR STUDENT IS MERELY A PAWN IN MY POMERANIAN’S PLOT FOR WORLD DOMINATION

Where did you see it? “Foothill Boulevard, between Pennsylvania and Lowell [in] La Crescenta”
What’d you like about it? “Touché, all you obnoxious parents.”

— Ben Elder, La Crescenta

who needs poetry

Where did you see it? “North Westdale… On Barry, just south of Sardis (near a Whole Foods)”
What’d you like about it? “[It was] in plain black, on white, without punctuation. It is poetry!

— Dave Kopplin, West L.A.

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MY KARMA RAN OVER YOUR DOGMA

What’d you like about it? “It says so much in so little text.”

— Russ Charvonia, Ventura

David Morrow's submission.

David Morrow’s submission.

(David Morrow)

MY SON WAS INMATE OF THE MONTH AT JACKSON COUNTY JAIL

Where did you see it? “In Lone Pine. The driver said he was from L.A.”

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— David Morrow, Bend, Ore.

Make Orwell Fiction Again

Where did you see it? “On the 5, just south of Magic Mountain.”
What’d you like about it? “Made me laugh … and continue to worry. It appeals to the literate.”

— Theo Moreno, Cambria

Katie Purtill's submission.

Katie Purtill’s submission.

(Katie Purtill)

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KEEP TOBIAS BLUE

Where did you see it? “Jefferson and Lincoln [in] Playa Vista.”
What’d you like about it? “A niche spoof on a classic California bumper sticker.”

— Katie Purtill, Playa del Rey

I ❤️ DYING AND AGING

Where did you see it? “It was parked in a red zone in front of Maury’s Bagels in Silver Lake.”
What’d you like about it? “I think we can all relate to this a little bit. I also wonder what would happen to sales of Ozempic if we embraced this idea more fully.”

— Ted Walker, Silver Lake

Roger Pugliese's submission.

Roger Pugliese’s submission.

(Roger Pugliese)

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DON’T CHANGE TOPANGA LET TOPANGA CHANGE YOU

Where did you see it? “In Topanga.”
What’d you like about it? “First, the bumper sticker was thought of by the Topanga Assn. for a Scenic Community. This organization has been around since 1963. It was established to fight off overdevelopment in the Santa Monica Mountains, specifically in Topanga. We all in Topanga realize Topanga needs to be enjoyed by everyone. People move here because they see something that enriches their soul. We wanted to get the message out and remind all why they came here and [to] not bring with them the very thing they were trying to get away from. We want folks to breath deep and love Topanga for what it offers and not change it to suit a more urban environment.”

— Roger Pugliese, Topanga

Alexis Evanoff's bumper sticker reads "Surely not everybody was kung fu fighting"

Alexis Evanoff’s submission.

(Alexis Evanoff)

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SURELY NOT EVERYBODY WAS KUNG FU FIGHTING

Where did you see it? “I was in the Valley, about to make a left onto Ventura Boulevard. I go to school at CSUN, so I have the privilege of escaping the Westside regularly.”
What’d you like about it? “The song immediately came to my mind when I read it, and I laughed out loud in my car so loud, like a huge dork, and it was fantastic.”

— Alexis Evanoff, West L.A.

bestie, let me merge

Where did you see it? “Palmdale near Antelope Valley Mall”
What’d you like about it? “[It was] in a Lisa Frank type of font in soft pastel colors. I laughed out loud when I read it. The sweet tone is so passive-aggressive.”

— Polly Drown, Palmdale

I BRACHIATE FOR GIBBONS

Where did you see it? “West L.A. in heavy traffic.”
What’d you like about it? “Cleverness. You see so many stickers saying I Brake For Squirrels, or Garage Sales or whatever. Brachiation is using your arms to swing through the tree branches, like gibbons and spider monkeys.”

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— Karen Hohenstein, West Hills

John Grimshaw's submission.

John Grimshaw’s submission.

(John Grimshaw)

Rugby Players Eat Their Dead

Where did you see it? “Seen at Foothill Ranch Library, Orange County.”
What’d you like about it? “Based on real events. College rugby team’s plane crashed in snowy Andes in 1972. Survivors had little food … they did have the dead bodies of family and friends. Of 45 people aboard, just 16 survived subfreezing nights until rescue 72 days later.”

— John Grimshaw, Lake Forest

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Kumail Nanjiani opens up on his regrets, critical failures and embracing fear : Wild Card with Rachel Martin

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Kumail Nanjiani opens up on his regrets, critical failures and embracing fear : Wild Card with Rachel Martin

A note from Wild Card host Rachel Martin: Here’s my theory about Kumail Nanjiani: He is not a person who is afraid of his feelings. I think he’s the opposite of that kind of person.

Kumail has made his emotional life part of his comedy – whether it’s his deep and abiding love for his wife (as told in the hit movie, “The Big Sick”), his obsession with his cat or the anxiety that grips him in the middle of the night – Kumail’s brand of comedy is often about how we feel our way through living.

His new standup special is on Hulu and it’s called “Night Thoughts.”

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Kylie Jenner Shows Off Figure in Backless Feather Dress

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Kylie Jenner Shows Off Figure in Backless Feather Dress

Kylie Jenner
Ultimate Showgirl with Backless, Curve Hugging Gown
… At Kylie Cosmetics Holiday Party!

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‘Harry Potter’ fans are flying to Broadway to see the original Draco Malfoy

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‘Harry Potter’ fans are flying to Broadway to see the original Draco Malfoy

Tom Felton, left, who played Harry Potter’s nemesis Draco Malfoy in eight films, is now playing him live on stage.

Matthew Murphy/Harry Potter and the Cursed Child


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Matthew Murphy/Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

Almost eight years after Harry Potter and the Cursed Child opened, it has become the highest grossing show on Broadway. Why? Tom Felton, who played Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter’s nemesis at Hogwarts in the eight films, is now playing him onstage.

After every performance, crowds gather at the stage door to get autographs, selfies or just a close-up glimpse of Felton.

Anna Chan flew to New York from San Francisco to see him in the show. “I grew up watching the movies and reading the books as a kid,” she said, “so just seeing him reprising his role as Draco Malfoy is really exciting and just heartwarming to see. It’s kinda like a full circle moment for him.”

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Felton feels the audience’s warmth. “I’m somewhat of a bookmark in their youth on the films,” he said. “To see them as excited as I am to be doing that again on the stage was… well, it’s overwhelming and it still is every night.”

Now 38, Felton spent much of his childhood, adolescence and young adulthood getting his hair bleached blond and sneering as the bully Draco Malfoy in the films. For 10 years, he worked with some of the finest actors of British stage and screen, including Dame Maggie Smith, Alan Rickman and Gary Oldman. Felton — and all the other young cast members — learned by example.

“You know, Alan Rickman making teas for the grips,” recalled Felton, “and Jason Isaacs telling anecdotes, Helena Bonham Carter sort of just being playful. I think that’s something that made the early Potter films very special — the adults around us did not take themselves too seriously. And so that allowed us to be playful.”

Tom Felton, right, with John Skelley as Harry Potter in Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, now on Broadway.

Tom Felton, right, with John Skelley as Harry Potter in Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, now on Broadway.

Matthew Murphy/Harry Potter and the Cursed Child


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Matthew Murphy/Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

Post-Potter, Felton has written a memoir and has appeared in films and on London’s West End. When he was given the opportunity to play an adult Draco Malfoy on Broadway for six months, he jumped.

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“I do understand the character somewhat,” he said, “although Draco now is a dad.” In the play, Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy’s sons become friends and get into a mess of trouble.

In the first act, he and the older Harry have a wizard’s duel and Felton said that, during rehearsal, he added a familiar line from the films that wasn’t in the script.

“When Harry and Draco first decide, ‘Come on, let’s have a scrap, let’s have a battle,’ I think it just came up voluntarily. I said, ‘Scared Potter?’ Felton recalled, laughing. “And then it was sort of looked over and then someone came back to me a few days later and said, ‘We’ve got it in, your line suggestion.’”

The audience gets to see Malfoy and Potter fly through the air and electrical arcs come out of their wands live onstage. “Every night you can hear or feel, rather, at least half the audience go back to their childhood or older memories,” Felton said. “The first time that they saw Draco and Harry duel. And because this one’s live and in front of your face, it’s just only more exciting, I think.”

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Felton said he’s proud to be part of the Harry Potter World, on film and on Broadway. He’ll be appearing in Harry Potter and the Cursed Child through May 10.

Jennifer Vanasco edited this story for broadcast and digital. Chloee Weiner mixed the audio.

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