Lifestyle
Hey Babe, Let’s Meet for Steak, Crayons and … Jazz?
“Backgammon is the cruelest game — so much of it is based on luck,” said Joe Urso, who was one tournament away from earning his grandmaster title, but down a few points in his match on a recent Wednesday night last month.
Mr. Urso, 41, and several other backgammon enthusiasts were meeting for the Clinton Hill Backgammon Club’s weekly game at Funny Bar, a new jazz-bar-restaurant on the Lower East Side of Manhattan. The backgammon club typically convenes in the restaurant’s conversation pit, in the center of the space that once housed a mechanical bull.
Before Funny Bar, the Essex Street venue lived several lives. It was once a Western-themed barbecue joint, then a hip-hop brunch spot. And for 40-years, it housed Schmulka Bernstein’s, New York City’s first kosher Chinese restaurant. The current owners, Tom Moore and Billy Jones, have worked some relics from these disparate incarnations into Funny Bar’s design. But they made sure the new version had no distinguishable theme.
“A lot of restaurants and clubs in New York present these very complete ideas to the customer,” said Mr. Moore, 30, whose parents met working in Chicago’s hotel industry. In the past couple of years, the rise of the overly designed clubstaurant has homogenized Lower Manhattan’s nightlife aesthetics: wood treated to look patinated, shelves packed with tchotchkes and vintage photos framed to imply a storied, local status that has yet to be earned.
The cavernous 2,800-square-foot interior of Funny Bar, designed by Safwat Riad, reflects a cheeky, Lynchian sensibility, with kitschy glass bricks, a slick grand piano and just-between-us lighting. The dining room’s walls are lined with purposely empty shelves. Crayons and paper tablecloths add a playful vibe to the massive, low-slung leather booths. Servers with face tattoos wear spotless, buttoned-up uniforms, adding to the sense of dissonance and mischief. The overall effect may make diners feel like children who stole their parents credit cards and went out for martinis.
“There are a lot of couples mindlessly doodling each other, but I really like when there are businessmen eating together and they start using the crayons to do math on the tables,” said Ava Schwartz, Funny Bar’s director, who, alongside Mr. Moore, can be spotted most nights greeting regulars and running steak frites. Funny Bar goes through about 600 crayons a week.
The owners did not bother with a drink menu. “We’re not really going for special,” said Funny Bar’s head chef, Raphael Wolf. The restaurant’s menu is appropriately simple and crowd-pleasing: salad, steak frites and a brownie sundae. Usually, there’s an off-menu vegetable dish. Of the decision to offer only steak, Mr. Moore said he did not want diners to feel bloated or like their breath smelled; he wanted to keep the night sexy. “And nothing is sexier than steak,” he added.
Mr. Moore and Mr. Jones opened the more popular Nightclub 101 just a few blocks away, but they have been reluctant to over-publicize Funny Bar, preferring to let it find patrons slowly. The location — tucked away on the side of Essex Street that most New Yorkers avoid — makes it that much more “if you know, you know.” The bar does not promote scheduled musical performances, and it has fewer than 3,000 Instagram followers.
Despite being coy about seeking attention, Funny Bar has found an eclectic fan base. On any given night, the crowd includes young fashion hounds, baby stockbrokers, middle-aged couples on dates and musicians like King Princess and the Dare, who are connected to Mr. Moore and Mr. Jones through their third venue, Baby’s All Right in Brooklyn.
Over the course of a typical night, tables and parties tend to merge, with guests eventually spilling into the conversation pit, mirroring the bustle and spontaneity of live jazz — the only music you’ll ever hear in Funny Bar. (So much is its commitment to the genre, that it was even worked into the restaurant’s phone number: 212-516-JAZZ.)
Some patrons have compared the social swirl of Funny Bar to that of the bars portrayed in the first season of Sex and the City — a comparison that proves itself every time someone writes their phone number down in crayon, tears it from its sheet and hands it off to a cute stranger.
Mario Kart World’s golden shell disperses coins to all who follow it.
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Nintendo announced that it sold more than 3.5 million Switch 2 consoles less than a week after its June 5 release. That feat makes it the fastest-selling Nintendo game system of all time. Most online retailers have run out of the console, and resellers have tagged on hundreds of dollars to the $449 MSRP on websites like eBay.
The Switch 2 will likely remain a hot item through the holiday sales season — but don’t despair. Stores get restocked periodically. Even if their websites appear empty, brick-and-mortar locations frequently have consoles reserved for in-person customers. And if you’ve logged more than 50 hours of playtime on a Nintendo account, you can line up online for an invitation to buy a Switch 2 directly from the company.
But even if you can get a Switch 2, should you buy one? Does it justify the steep cost? Are its launch games really worth it? After playtesting the console at press events and over the course of a bleary week, I’ve got answers.
The Switch 2, displayed in tabletop mode with its Joy-Cons detached.
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Nintendo’s new era
The Switch 2 improves on the first generation in (almost) every way. Nintendo has exhaustively described how, but I’ll break down the highlights.
The Switch 2 has a bigger screen and bigger Joy-Cons (though, remarkably, it’s still as skinny as the original Switch). It narrows the performance gap with its console competitors. It’s no PlayStation 5, but it is more powerful than a PS4 — and fits between your hands.
It’s also, blessedly, backwards-compatible. The vast majority of the old Switch catalog works seamlessly, though a few have special Switch 2 upgrades. For $10 (free for Nintendo Switch Online subscribers), Tears of the Kingdom plays smoothly on a Switch 2, while it could really struggle on the original Switch. The extra power is also ushering in games that were out of reach for Nintendo users, including Cyberpunk 2077 and Elden Ring.
Nintendo Switch 2 Joy-Cons being used conventionally and as a mouse.
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While I adore all fancy controllers (the new Pro Controller’s great, by the way), it’s the updated Joy-Cons that impress me the most. They magnetize onto the sides of the console with a satisfying snap and stay firmly attached no matter how bumpy my train commutes have gotten. At a button-press, they’ll slip off and can be used like computer mice on nearly any surface. Believe me — I’ve tested it on cushions, pants, books, tables and even my wife’s pregnant belly! I await a killer app for this gimmicky feature, but it’s been useful for strategy games like Civilization 7.
Original Switch controllers still work with the Switch 2 — but the comparison isn’t flattering. Returning to the older Joy-Cons for some 4-player Mario Party was painful, between the smaller buttons to the inconsistent wireless pairing. But those Joy-Cons are admittedly well-used. Time will only tell if the new models will largely avoid the notorious “stick drift” that plagued the original Joy-Cons.
The console isn’t perfect. The straps for the detached Joy-Cons make them more stable to use as mice, but they also make the shoulder buttons slightly harder to press since they raise the edges around them. Much-touted “Game Chat” features let you easily talk to friends, but you can’t use the video-conferencing features unless you shrink the gameplay screen. Speaking of screens, while the Switch 2 boasts vivid colors, HD resolution and a high refresh rate, it’s not quite as luminous as the OLED Switch screen I’m coming from. Finally, the paltry internal memory can’t hold many modern games — you’ll need an expensive microSD express card to download more.
Gripes aside, I’m loving the Switch 2 and now gravitate to it more than my cherished Steam Deck. I don’t think every Nintendo fan will need to upgrade until more exclusive games arrive, but if you can afford it now and know that you’ll want one eventually, it’s easy to recommend. Especially if you’re eager to sling shells, crush mushrooms, and vroom to victory.
Mario Kart World
The original Switch launched with Breath of the Wild, one of the most influential games of all time. Mario Kart World doesn’t break as much ground, but it’s got more in common with that trailblazer than I initially thought.
Wario and Waluigi form a motorcycle duo in Mario Kart World’s “Free Roam” mode.
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When I previewed the game in April, I described it as baby’s first Forza Horizon: an open-world racing game that would undoubtedly brim with noisome side activities. It’s actually got a far lighter touch. The game strings dozens of possible races across an interconnected landscape for hectic Grand Prix events and 24-person Knockout rounds. Yet you can also freely roam across the titular world and discover its many delights — which, like Breath of the Wild, aren’t advertised on the map.
Granted, blue-coin dashes and time trials rarely made me squawk with surprise like the shrines and secrets of a Zelda game. But these challenges perfectly fit in-between competitive bouts. Unfortunately, the mode works best when playing alone. Online friends can roam with you, but you can’t unlock costumes and achievements while playing with them.
When it comes to actual racing, World feels like Mario Kart 8 with wider roads and glitzy new power-ups. It’s hard to improve on 8’s formula, which embraces the greatest hits from decades of series history. But by expanding the space between the races, Mario Kart World feels innovative enough to earn the $80 asking price.
Miniscule people explore a gargantuan console in Nintendo Switch 2 Welcome Tour.
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Nintendo Switch 2 Welcome Tour
The other Nintendo launch title, conversely, feels like homework — and I don’t exactly mean that as an insult. Welcome Tour synthesizes Nintendo’s recent forays into theme park and museum design into an exhaustive survey of Switch 2 hardware.
Imagine you’re an ant, crawling along the Switch 2’s surface, hungrily grubbing up morsels. That’s the Welcome Tour experience. Your tiny avatar hunts for hidden stamps needed to progress through a massive console and its peripherals. You’ll also endure demonstrations and occasionally entertaining minigames meant to show off the Switch 2. As tech demos go, it falls short of the heights set by Astro’s Playroom. But as an interactive exhibition piece, it’s oddly compelling.
A sampling of the occasionally whimsical answers to one of Nintendo Switch 2 Welcome Tour’s many quizzes.
Nintendo/James Mastromarino
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I made it my mission to ace all of Welcome Tour’s quizzes, which the game doles out after you’ve read facts about the Switch 2. Complete with satisfying bloop sounds and jokey answers, these multiple-choice tests target technical manual enjoyers and How It’s Made watchers (a population that overlaps considerably with gaming console reviewers!). Poindexters like me will feel welcome in Welcome Tour. Everyone else may as well save the $10.
Brooklyn Beckham
Wifey’s Ink-redible Words …
Getting Me Through the Family Drama!!!
Published
Brooklyn Beckham’s loyalty is crystal clear — ’cause he’s showing off an elaborate tat that’s practically screaming how his wife Nicola Peltz is helping him navigate their messy family rift.
Not long after fans caught him hiding his “mama’s boy” tattoo, Brooklyn shamelessly plugged the ink on his upper back, just below his neck. And it’s not just any design … it’s an encouraging note from Nicola herself, written to him before their April 2022 wedding.
The note reads, “My forever boy. Read this anytime you feel anxious. I want you to know how deeply loved you are. You have the kindest heart I’ve ever met and hope I never go a day without your love.”
The note also added a little reminder on how they’ll get through it all if he just breathes slow and trusts — and it was signed off with “your future wifey.”
TMZ.com
Looks like Brooklyn and Nicola are doing a lot of deep breathing to power through the family drama. Sources tell TMZ there’s been zero progress in fixing their rocky relationship with the rest of the Beckham clan.
We broke the story … Brooklyn and his brother Romeo have not been speaking for months ever since Romeo started dating Kim Turnbull — Brooklyn’s ex, who he didn’t trust her intentions with his bro.
Even though Romeo’s recently split from Kim, it looks like the damage is done. Guess this family drama’s too inked in to fix now!
An Arrow to Amsterdam
Traveling Berlin solo, I download a dating app to find someone in the famously queer city. Waiting at a cafe, I text: “all black, striped bag, blond head.” Maren embraces me with ease. We talk for hours, but I’m so aware of our age gap that I never make a move. As I travel through Europe, her texts keep coming — sweet, intimate, funny. Finally, she sends a map with arrows pointing back to Berlin. I send an arrow pointing to Amsterdam, my final stop before returning to California. Two beautiful Dutch days have led to two deeply romantic years. — Abigail Severance
Visions of My Father
Rounding the snack aisle at Trader Joe’s, I see them examining scones: a woman around my age, mid-50s, and her father, in his 80s. Stooped yet still tall, with surfer-blond hair, he resembles my dad, gone a quarter of a century. It’s only through others that I can imagine what he’d be like now. “Those cranberry orange scones are the best,” I say. They thank me for the tip. Later in the parking lot, I watch as she gently guides him into the car. I let my tears fall, grateful for a glimpse of another daughter’s love. — Joelle Fraser
A Reorganized Life
After months of dating, Elena offered to help me move into a new Italian apartment. I warned her about my book collection: 12 boxes of tomes accumulated over years of grad school. She arrived early with her own moving gloves. While I struggled with furniture, she methodically labeled each box by author and era. After unpacking in my new place, I discovered she’d reorganized my entire library by philosophical movement, creating a system more elegant than anything I’d managed in years. I realized then that I wasn’t just moving apartments; I was moving toward a better, restructured life with her. — Luciano Magaldi Sardella
From Five to Forever
I was drawn to her pencil case before I was drawn to her. Looking at the metal tin with its rainbow collection of gel pens, I thought, “I need access.” That’s how, at age 5, Jia became my best friend. Our relationship has ebbed and flowed over the years. We’ve exchanged “best” for “oldest” while holding on fiercely to “friend.” Now we’re long distance. She’s back home in Adelaide, Australia, still getting invited to underground raves while I’m in New Jersey, getting rowdy at my book club. We’re not opposites, but counterweights, keeping each other steady for almost 30 years. — Olga Grudinina
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