Connect with us

Lifestyle

The First (and Last) Time She Didn’t Come Home

Published

on

The First (and Last) Time She Didn’t Come Home

The final time my mom and I traveled collectively was on a school go to to those mountains the summer season earlier than she died. We had pushed the Blue Ridge Parkway and eaten at a restaurant the place marijuana wafted via the air. Barefoot in a stream with bouquets of rhododendron in bloom round us and smooth-worn stones beneath our ft, my mom advised me her soul was the happiest it had been in a protracted whereas.

Now, by my entrance door, wineberries kind a thicket behind a hobbled apple tree. My youngest baby and I pluck the crimson thimbles on summer season mornings. Lavender blooms sideways, reaching out for the solar from beneath a patch of crimson raspberries that develop rampant together with a smattering of purple-budded weeds, day lilies, black-eyed Susans, bee balm, lamb’s ear, irises. Within the winter, when the bushes are naked, you may see an expanse of mountain ridge to the south.

My mom would have cherished this life. She would have cherished my husband and our attractive feral kids. I want she would have stayed, seen this place, the way in which it appears to be like when issues get a bit simpler.

Once we first moved right here six years in the past, I ripped out a rosebush with light-pink blooms like my mom’s. I wished extra space for tomatoes, I advised my husband. Actually, although, I wished to exile the each day reminder of my mom. That primal guilt remained, chilly and punishing, waking me at evening to ruminate.

I do know firsthand the influence that unchecked grief and nervousness can have on a household. As soon as it turned clear that mine was affecting not solely me, however the individuals I like most, I sought the sort of therapy I imagine would have additionally helped my mom.

Advertisement

Remedy meant revisiting the scenes main as much as my mom’s dying till they didn’t damage as a lot, and cultivating compassion for the teenage woman experiencing them. The guilt won’t ever go away completely. I’m not “healed.” However I’ve discovered the right way to regard myself with an increasing number of tenderness, like a mom would.

Continue Reading
Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Lifestyle

If you're on the fence(-ing), here's why we love the Olympics : Pop Culture Happy Hour

Published

on

If you're on the fence(-ing), here's why we love the Olympics : Pop Culture Happy Hour

Simone Biles celebrates during the Women’s Gymnastics Team Final medal ceremony at the 2024 Paris Olympics.

Naomi Baker/Getty Images


hide caption

toggle caption

Advertisement

Naomi Baker/Getty Images


Simone Biles celebrates during the Women’s Gymnastics Team Final medal ceremony at the 2024 Paris Olympics.

Naomi Baker/Getty Images

There is nothing better for the summer doldrums than a blast of Olympic glory. For a couple of weeks this summer, athletes are showing us how they flip, run, swim, climb, and paddle and even breakdance to prove they are the best in the world. We’re checking in with the 2024 Olympics, including wins for gymnast Simone Biles, swimmer Katie Ledecky, and sprinter Noah Lyles.

Subscribe to Pop Culture Happy Hour Plus at plus.npr.org/happyhour

Advertisement
Continue Reading

Lifestyle

Elle King Faced 'High Level of Pain' During Dolly Parton Drunken Tribute

Published

on

Elle King Faced 'High Level of Pain' During Dolly Parton Drunken Tribute

Advertisement

Advertisement

Continue Reading

Lifestyle

'Women in Blue' fight sexism — and a serial killer — in this Mexican drama

Published

on

'Women in Blue' fight sexism — and a serial killer — in this Mexican drama

Bárbara Mori plays María in Women in Blue.

Apple TV+


hide caption

toggle caption

Advertisement

Apple TV+

Over the years, TV has offered up an entire precinct worth of women cops — from Angie Dickinson’s spicy Pepper Anderson in the ‘70s hit Police Woman, to Helen Mirren’s flinty Jane Tennison in the great ’90s series Prime Suspect, to Mariska Hargitay’s driven Olivia Benson, who will doubtless still be solving sex crimes on Law & Order: SVU long after the oceans have swallowed New York City. We’ve watched so many women with badges that it’s easy to forget there was a time when most men believed there shouldn’t be any.

That belief is the starting point of a new Mexican-made TV series, Women in Blue which is streaming on AppleTV+. Set in the hyper-conservative Mexico of 1971, this lively 10-part drama focuses on four vastly different women who go to work for the police and discover that it’s easier to capture a serial killer than to deal with the assorted misogynies of the men around them.

As the story begins, Mexico City is being terrorized by a woman-killing maniac known as the Undresser, for the way he leaves his victims. To distract from the force’s failure to catch this killer, the police chief cooks up a publicity stunt. He announces that he’s opening up the police department to women, an idea he feels sure will get scads of upbeat coverage.

Advertisement

We follow four new recruits. Foremost among them is María, who once dreamed of being a detective but wound up an elegant bourgeois mother with a husband you know is cheating the instant you see him. There’s her sister Valentina, a revved-up feminist who hates the government. There’s Ángeles, a loner who does most of the actual crime solving. And finally there’s Gabina, a born cop whose policeman father slaps her face for joining the force against his wishes.

These four shine in training, but when it comes time to do the job — dressed in blue mini-skirts! — they’re treated as a joke. Sent out to patrol a park, they’re given not weapons but a bag with coins — to call the cops if they uncover a crime. Naturally, they do uncover one — they find the Undresser’s latest victim. And even though they’re ordered not to, they throw themselves into tracking down the killer.

Early on, I got a bit bored watching the relentless sexism faced by our heroines. I don’t doubt its realism, but nothing is more tiresome than having to watch people be bigoted in stupid ways that the world has passed by. This is 2024, and hearing some macho detective snarl that women can’t be cops made me fear that Women in Blue might be one of those shows that simply flatters its audience by letting us feel more enlightened than the people from an earlier era.

Happily, the show grows more interesting, with each of the quartet facing a different form of misogyny, even within their own families. And like them, we discover some startling wrinkles in Mexican law back then — like Article 169 of the country’s civil code. It held that a Mexican woman could be forced to quit a job if it affects the “integrity” of her family — and the person who got to decide on this was her husband. It’s since been repealed.

Although there are original works about the shocking level of femicide in Mexico — most famously Roberto Bolaño’s great novel 2666 — Women in Blue’s crime plot is pretty generic. It resorts to such tired standbys as the cultivated serial killer who gives them brainy tips from his prison cell and the murderer deciding to target the women in blue who are investigating him.

Advertisement

The show’s real strength lies in showing how each of the heroines is transformed by joining the force, be it Ángeles breaking free of her emotional isolation or the idealistic Gabina discovering the brutal, corrupt truth about policing in Mexico. The story’s feminist angle is clearest in María, who, with her nice house, fancy clothes and George Clooney-looking husband, is the one who would seem to have it made. She’s the one who must decide whether she’ll sacrifice comfort to work in a police department whose men don’t want women in it.

By the end of Women in Blue, its heroines — and its audience — come face to face with a radical truth: What drives the Undresser to kill women is grounded in the ingrained patriarchal values that ordinary women lived with every single day.

Continue Reading

Trending