Lifestyle
Buscaba padre para mi hijo (no tenía que ser mi pareja)
Cuando se marchó, puse manos a la obra; entrevisté a parteras, busqué en web artículos de bebé e intentaba explicarle al ser que llevaba en mi vientre por qué lloraba tanto: “Lo siento, bebé. Estoy bien. Solo me siento triste”.
Entonces, semanas después, sin previo aviso, me llegó un mensaje de texto: “Cometí un horrible error”.
A esas alturas, reconocí que el error no había sido solo suyo.
Cuando el amor y un bebé coincidieron para mí, seguía creyendo que podía separar ambas cosas y seguir intacta. No fue sino hasta que Rex y yo sufrimos que pude ver que la realidad inofensiva que imaginé nunca había existido entre nosotros. Se había evaporado en el momento en que me saludó al last del camino de terracería, y mi cuerpo respondió con calidez.
El budismo se basa en la revelación de que el sufrimiento es causado por el deseo, lo que a primera vista puede hacer que tanto el sufrimiento como el deseo suenen inequívocamente negativos. No obstante, la belleza del sufrimiento es que ofrece la oportunidad de tener una relación curiosa y tierna con el deseo, de escucharlo en lugar de intentar erradicarlo. A menudo, lo que escucho bajo el ruido superficial de mi deseo no es problemático, solo humano: la vulnerabilidad de tener una vida enredada con otros.
En ausencia de Rex, recordé que atender a un amante o a un hijo es un trabajo sucio, en el sentido más sano. No nos enamoramos ni tenemos un bebé para que se afirmen nuestros puntos de vista y preferencias. Lo hacemos, al menos un poco, para suavizar nuestro singular y solitario management sobre la realidad e invitar a lo inesperado, lo indeseable y lo inexplicable.
Eso —llámese desorden, o riqueza, o vida a manos llenas— es lo hermoso y pure de ser un animal con apetitos más allá de nuestra comprensión. Ser fiel, en el sentido más profundo, a un amante o a un bebé es decir sí a lo extraño y memorable antes de saber que lo quieres o lo aceptas.
Rex llegó a esa conclusión a su manera. Me dijo que, desde que se fue de California, había estado escuchando varios pódcast sobre la paternidad y mirando la foto que me tomó el día que se fue. También había estado llorando. Y quería volver.
Lifestyle
Street Style Trend of the Week: Clashing Prints
Jeffrey Bernick, 41, in his numerous patterns and prints, was impossible to ignore as he was walking on Fifth Avenue in the Flatiron district of Manhattan on a Saturday in December.
Mr. Bernick, a costumer for TV shows and films, said he was on his way to Trader Joe’s and had just been browsing the selection of clothes and accessories at the nearby Filson store. He described the outfit he was wearing as cozy and having an “upstate vibe.”
“I spend most of my days surrounded by tons of clothing and lots of creatives that all have their personal style,” Mr. Bernick said. “I feel I take inspiration from them and vice versa. We get to play all day and put things together that you may not have thought would work, but look amazing onscreen.”
Lifestyle
Chris Brown Hits Warner Bros. Discovery With $500 Million Defamation Suit
Chris Brown is suing the producers behind Investigation Discovery’s “Chris Brown: A History of Violence” docuseries … alleging the project was full of straight up lies.
In new court documents obtained by TMZ … the singer accuses Warner Bros. Discovery, Ample, and other individuals behind the series of promoting and publishing defamatory claims against him — even after allegedly being provided with “proof” that their narrative was false.
Not only does Brown state the Jane Doe at the center of the docuseries has been repeatedly discredited, but he highlights he has never been found guilty “of any sex related crime” … slamming the docuseries for labeling him “a serial rapist and a sexual abuser.”
He claims they based the docuseries largely on a lawsuit Jane Doe brought against him … adding she later withdrew the suit because it was full of lies.
Brown says the producers and the Jane Doe chose to disregard fact in order to defame him and his reputation … which he says he’s spent over a decade repairing.
The singer claims he’s taken accountability for his “past mistakes” – including the physical assault on ex-girlfriend Rihanna – and has grown from them … and slams ‘A History of Violence’ producers for pushing an old narrative in the name of fame and fortune.
Brown says he’s been directly impacted by this docuseries … as it’s taken a toll on his reputation, career, and business opportunities. So, he’s seeking $500 million in damages … which he partly plans to donate to victims of sexual abuse if awarded.
We’ve reached out to Ample and Warner Bros. Discovery for comment … so far, no word back.
Lifestyle
Fresh Off ‘Severance,’ John Turturro Tries Male Modeling
When John Turturro saw that the setting for Zegna’s runway show here was a grassy knoll, he wondered if he’d fallen into an Italian wormhole and landed back on the set of “Severance.”
“That was my first thought,” Mr. Turturro said backstage after the show, still bristling with energy from having just completed his first ever turn as a runway model.
See, Zegna’s verdant stage looked a lot like a set from Season 2 of “Severance,” which had its premiere on Friday. It’s not quite a spoiler to discuss this, as the nubby green landscape is visible in the season’s trailer. Still, Mr. Turturro, 67, the journeyman American actor who plays one of the metaphysically split Lumon Industries employees on the show, was not keen to reveal any more about where the show was heading.
So we left it at that. But, Mr. Turturro was happy to discuss his modeling cameo for 115-year-old Zegna. (For what it’s worth, the setting was designed to evoke the grassland where sheep graze: Zegna used the collection to introduce Vellus Aureum designs, which it boasts are made from the finest wool in the world. Grass, sheep, wool. Got it.)
“That was my virginal walk,” said Mr. Turturro, still dressed in the plunging V-neck sweater and swishy pleated trousers he sported on the runway. He had shed the va-va-voom tweed coat, and it was lying nearby.
A “Severance” outfit this was not. That show’s corporate cogs trudge about in blue suits and uninspired no-iron shirts — clothes that make them appear inoffensive to the point of being invisible.
In contrast, this masterful Zegna collection, designed by Alessandro Sartori, Zegna’s longstanding artistic director, demanded close inspection and a good bit of attention. Plaids were scaled up as if peered at through a microscope. And a corduroy suit, a men’s wear archetype about as old as Zegna itself, slouched like a nubbly bathrobe.
Peer closer: Yes, that was two button-up shirts trickily stacked on top of each other. (It may have been lost on Mr. Sartori, an Italian, but to American eyes, this is a layering move that calls to mind one person: Steve Bannon.) And the button on that sport coat was planted lower than usual. And yes, its lapels were beefier than the average, making the models, many of them gray-bearded and a good generation beyond the models you normally see in Milan, look like 1970s casino magnates you wouldn’t want to cross.
As Mr. Turturro walked his rookie walk — his coat easing back at the shoulders, his hands stuffed in his pockets, a slight smirk conveying that he was in command and unbothered — it was evident just how Zegna had won over the Davos set and the self-assured Hollywood types.
“You would feel that at my age you don’t get new experiences,” Mr. Turturro said after the show. “This was a new experience for me.” Certainly he was a long way from Lumon Industries.
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