Health
Grieving during Mother’s Day: 5 tips for navigating the first holiday after losing a mom
Mother’s Day is a celebration for most. Yet for those who have lost their moms, it can be a difficult day marked by grief and isolation.
“The first year after any loss can be awful, but the holidays stand out in particular,” noted Rebecca Feinglos, a certified grief support specialist in North Carolina and founder of Grieve Leave, an online community to support grievers.
“Your first Mother’s Day after the death of your mom can make her absence feel even more real. It’s a stark reminder of the permanence of the loss.”
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For those who had a close bond with their mother, Feinglos said the absence can feel like a “gaping hole” in their everyday lives.
“And for those whose relationships with their mothers were less than ideal, Mother’s Day can bring up a whole different set of emotions,” she said.
For those who have lost their mothers, Mother’s Day can be a difficult day to manage. A certified grief support specialist (not pictured) shares insights and help for coping. (iStock)
“There may be a mix of grief for the relationship they never had, along with anger or resentment over past hurts.”
“The key is to be intentional about how you want to spend the day.”
It doesn’t help that Mother’s Day is a highly publicized holiday with such an emphasis on the mother-child relationship, Feinglos said.
“Everywhere you turn, there are advertisements, social media posts and conversations centered around celebrating mothers,” she said.
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“For those who have recently lost their mom, this constant barrage of Mother’s Day messaging can feel like salt in the wound, regardless of the circumstances of their relationship.”
“For those who have recently lost their mom, [the] constant barrage of Mother’s Day messaging can feel like salt in the wound, regardless of the circumstances of their relationship,” an expert said. (iStock)
For those who are approaching their first Mother’s Day after losing a mom, Feinglos offered five tips for navigating the difficult emotions.
1. Make a plan
“Trust me, you don’t want to wake up on your first motherless Mother’s Day with no idea of how to spend the day,” Feinglos said.
“That’s a recipe for a major grief spiral and for potentially doom-scrolling other people’s ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ posts.”
The expert recommends thinking in advance about what you might want your day to look like — and then planning for it.
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“It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. Maybe it’s watching your mom’s favorite movies on Netflix, ordering her favorite takeout, or going for a hike on a trail you used to walk together,” she said.
“The key is to be intentional about how you want to spend the day.”
“The first year after any loss can be awful, but the holidays stand out in particular,” a grief expert noted. (iStock)
If you do decide to venture out, Feinglos said, it’s important to be prepared for Mother’s Day-focused events, including restaurant menu specials.
“If that feels like too much to handle, consider having an at-home dinner plan instead,” she suggested.
2. Reach out to others
Grief can be isolating, Feinglos said, and it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one in the world who has ever felt this way.
“But when you’re open and willing to ask for help, you might be surprised by how much better you’ll feel just saying that you’re having a tough time,” she said.
“Your first Mother’s Day after the death of your mom can make her absence feel even more real.”
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or just need someone to talk to, Feinglos said to take the initiative in reaching out, rather than waiting for someone to contact you.
“Pick up the phone, send a text or even just post on social media about how you’re feeling,” she suggested.
Those who are grieving should reach out to family and friends for support, an expert advised. (iStock)
“I have a feeling that your community will be ready and willing to offer their support.”
3. Let people support you
Those who are grieving may be afraid that they’re a burden on friends and loved ones, Feinglos noted.
“But here’s the thing: The people who care about you want to be there for you,” she said.
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“So, when your best friend offers to come over on Mother’s Day and hang out, or your sibling suggests a family Zoom call, say yes. Letting others show up for you can make the day feel a little less overwhelming.”
4. Create a ritual to make space for your grief
One of the most meaningful things you can do on Mother’s Day, according to Feinglos, is to “intentionally create a ritual that makes space for your grief.”
Journaling or writing a letter to your late mother is one way to process your feelings on Mother’s Day. (iStock)
“That could mean writing your late mother a letter and burning it or casting it into a body of water, visiting a place that was special to both of you, listening to her favorite music — or doing something that reflects her values and passions,” she said.
The idea is to do something intentional that helps you feel connected to your mom, even though she’s not physically there, the expert said.
“By creating space for your grief, you’re giving yourself permission to feel all the complicated emotions that come with loss.”
“Your relationship with your person can continue even when they’ve died,” Feinglos said.
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“By creating space for your grief, you’re giving yourself permission to feel all the complicated emotions that come with loss.”
5. Know that there are different shades of grief
Grief doesn’t follow any rules or timelines, Feinglos said — and it can look completely different from one person to the next, especially because every bond is unique.
“There’s no one ‘normal’ way grief plays out,” she said.
“For some, it might hit like a tsunami of tears, especially on gut-punch days like Mother’s Day.”
It’s important not to suppress or ignore feelings of grief on Mother’s Day, a mental health expert said. (iStock)
“Maybe you vacillate between being present one moment and feeling utterly numb the next, laughing through tears one day and feeling bitter anger the next.”
On a day like Mother’s Day, Feinglos said, you might find that your thoughts loop back to your loved one regularly, or you could tend to avoid anything that could stir up memories.
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Whatever way your grief manifests, Feinglos emphasized the importance of not trying to suppress or ignore it.
“At its core, grief underscores one truth: You’re alive, you’re human, and you’re going through a loss,” an expert said. (iStock)
“When we disregard our grief, it can pop back up in ways that are really inconvenient, or even scary — like lashing out at loved ones, feeling hopeless or [engaging in] risky behaviors,” she told Fox News Digital.
“Give yourself the space and time to relearn what your life is like now with this loss in mind,” she continued.
“At its core, grief underscores one truth: You’re alive, you’re human, and you’re going through a loss.”
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Fitness influencer and trainer Mark Langowski, known on social media as @bodybymark, hosted a pushup and plank competition in New York City this week, where he urged the public to get up and get moving.
On his platform of nearly two million Instagram followers, Langowski asks fit people to share their workout routines. He was able to meet more in-shape New Yorkers at his Washington Square Park meet-up, in partnership with Oikos yogurt on May 12.
A male and a female winner who achieved the most pushups or held a plank the longest were gifted $500 each.
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Besides the cash prize, the inspiration was to get more people moving, Langowski shared during an interview with Fox News Digital.
Fitness influencer and trainer Mark Langowski, known on social media as @bodybymark, hosted a pushup and plank competition in New York City this week, where he urged the public to get up and get moving. (Kelly McGreal/Fox News Digital)
“[It’s] a way to encourage strength and overall fitness in New York City and all around the country,” he said.
“We got together and we’re doing a plank competition, pushup competition. We had a guy just do 111 pushups. We’re just getting people moving.”
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Langowski said the attributes of a great competitor include strength, humility and confidence.
“The people who … did the most, they didn’t say they were going to do the most,” he said. “And there were other people who said they could do 150, and they did 70.”
Having a bit of humility helps make a good competitor, the trainer added.
@BodybyMark films the pushup competition’s male winner during a meet-up in Washington Square Park in New York City on May 12, 2026. (Kelly McGreal/Fox News Digital)
Pushups and planks mark a “good general baseline” for measuring fitness level, according to Langowski. Some other basics include pull-ups, squats and endurance challenges, like running a mile — the kind of basics included in an elementary school fitness assessment.
For those who haven’t yet mastered these basics but want to get in better shape, Langowski shared some advice on how to get started.
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“Get with a trainer or someone who knows how to progress you,” he advised. “A lot of people are like, ‘I can’t do a pushup, so I’m never going to do one.’ That’s not the way.”
Langowski recommends starting with pushups on your knees or against a wall, then gradually progressing to standard pushups by moving onto your toes and lowering yourself fully to the ground before pushing back up.
The trainer recommends starting with pushups on your knees or against a wall, then gradually progressing to standard pushups by moving onto your toes and lowering yourself fully to the ground before pushing back up. (Milan Markovic/iStock)
“You’ll be surprised after you do that for a couple weeks, a couple months, a couple years – you’re going to be able to do a lot,” he said. “Nobody was born being able to do 111 pushups. They put in the work and they started somewhere.”
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The trainer noted that in addition to practicing, it’s just as important to give the body rest and to support muscle growth with proper protein intake and an overall healthy diet.
But perhaps the most crucial step toward getting in shape, according to Langowski, is having the motivation to get started
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“I know that’s easy for me to say – I’ve been in fitness and been relatively fit most of my life,” he said. “And I know a lot of people are sitting on the couch and they either feel sorry for themselves or they’re going through a tough time … You’ve just got to get out there.”
The trainer noted that in addition to practicing, it’s just as important to give the body rest and to support muscle growth with proper protein intake and an overall healthy diet. (iStock)
The trainer suggested starting with a simple walk — even just around the block — with no gym equipment required.
“You don’t need an expensive gym membership to get in good shape,” he said. “Most of the people that I stop on the street, they don’t have a gym membership at all. They do it in their living room.”
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“And that’s where you can do the exercises I mentioned – the squats, the lunges, the pushups,” Langowski went on.
“So, I would encourage people just to start, but also to get some friends or get a trainer, someone to support you and do it safely.”
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Researchers have shed fresh light on how a simple, centuries-old Chinese practice could be almost as effective as some medications in lowering blood pressure.
Baduanjin is a form of exercise that’s been widely practiced in China for at least 800 years. It involves a series of eight slow movements, gentle breathing and meditation — and typically takes only about 10 minutes to complete.
In a clinical trial, researchers studied 216 adults age 40 and older with Stage 1 hypertension. Over the course of a year, participants performed either baduanjin, self-directed exercise or brisk walking.
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Researchers found that participants who practiced baduanjin five times per week experienced lower blood pressure within three months.
The results were “comparable to reductions seen with some first-line medications,” they wrote in their report published by the American College of Cardiology.
High blood pressure, if left untreated, can lead to heart attack and stroke. Now, researchers have shed new light on how a simple, centuries-old Chinese practice could be almost as effective as some medications in lowering blood pressure. (andreswd/Getty Images)
Baduanjin also showed “comparable results and safety profile to brisk walking at one year,” the researchers further reported.
“Given its simplicity, safety and ease at which one can maintain long-term adherence, baduanjin can be implemented as an effective, accessible and scalable lifestyle intervention for individuals trying to reduce their [blood pressure],” said the senior author of the study, Jing Li, M.D., Ph.D.
Dr. Matthew Saybolt, medical director of the Hackensack Meridian Jersey Shore University Medical Center’s Structural Heart Disease Program, said he was surprised by an aspect of the study’s results.
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“I was biased and expected that higher intensity exercise like brisk walking would have resulted in greater improvement in blood pressure than baduanjin, but the effects were the same,” Saybolt told Fox News Digital. (He was not affiliated with the study.)
Dr. Antony Chu, clinical assistant professor at Brown University’s Warren Alpert School of Medicine, was born and raised in the U.S. to immigrant parents — his mother is from Hong Kong and his father is from Taiwan.
Practitioners of baduanjin, such as those in this class, incorporate slow movements with mindful breathing. (Xinhua News Agency/Getty Images)
Having spent a lot of summers in Asia, Chu told Fox News he experienced “the best of both worlds” concerning Eastern and Western medicine, including exposure to the benefits of baduanjin.
“[These researchers] are taking a lot of things that have been commonplace for many, many centuries or millennia and then just applying mathematical modeling and statistical analysis to sort of give [them] some credibility,” Chu said.
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“Western medicine is reactionary,” Chu also said.
He compared the philosophies to a house on fire: Eastern medicine practitioners are more invested in preventing the fire, whereas Western medicine is more focused on “all those things that it would need to do to try to put that fire out,” he said, sharing his opinion.
A new study shows how people with high blood pressure can reduce it without medicine. (FG Trade/Getty Images)
Left untreated, high blood pressure has dangers that are “too numerous to count,” Saybolt said. The risks include increased risks of stroke, heart attack, atrial fibrillation and congestive heart failure.
Baduanjin, Chu said, is effective at reducing blood pressure, which he likened to “the water pressure and the pipes of your house,” by calming the nervous system and reducing stress.
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“People are totally stressed out,” Chu said. “And stress reduction is huge.”
Saybolt said the study offers hope for people with hypertension — “and that hope doesn’t immediately have to include pharmaceuticals.”
Baduanjin is easily incorporated into most lifestyles and can be done without equipment almost anywhere and at any time. (Getty Images)
Saybolt added that he’s always advocated for lifestyle modifications, including healthy diet and exercise, “as key therapies for treatment of diseases and to improve longevity.”
With the baduanjin data, Saybold said he is now “more optimistic than ever,” as “we have evidence that a very low impact exercise with mindfulness can yield a benefit.”
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Chu said that translating overwhelming medical guidelines is a big part of his job.
“It’s not to just tell somebody, ‘Hey, your blood pressure’s too high, pick a pill,” he said.
Baduanjin has been a preventative health practice the Chinese have been incorporating into their routines for centuries. (Xinhua News Agency/Getty Images)
“Lifestyle changes” can be daunting for many people, he added.
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“They always make it sound like you have to live for seven years in Tibet on a mountain somewhere, and it’s really not that.”
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His simple translation for the baduanjin study is this: “Close the door in your office and just say, ‘I can’t be bothered for 10 minutes,’ and just focus on breathing slowly and moving your arms or legs around.”
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