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Your kids may need help making friends after the big pandemic pause. Here’s how

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Your kids may need help making friends after the big pandemic pause. Here’s how

At first, there was bodily isolation, a transparent and apparent hindrance to constructing or sustaining connection. Then we moved on to navigating every particular person household’s Covid-19 insurance policies. Positive, our youngsters need to hang around. However are the dad and mom and caregivers on the identical web page with masking, open home windows and runny-nose monitoring? This was arduous sufficient to find out with outdated mates, not to mention with a household we might simply met.

Issues loosened, many dad and mom and caregivers let their guards down a bit, however by then the children have been rusty. Perhaps they’d mates, however from the dad and mom’ and caregivers’ perspective, one thing was lacking: an intimacy or dependency they recalled from their childhood friendships. Or possibly your children went via the varsity yr with out reporting a lot in the way in which of something about mates, new or outdated. Typically, this lack of connection did not even appear to trouble them.

Odds are that each one of our youngsters may use just a little assist rebuilding social ties as they enter this college yr. Listed here are some methods to strategy this newest problem.

The problem: Dad and mom and caregivers, we can assist our youngsters make new mates, and deepen friendships with present mates with out embarrassing them on the playground or in group texts. Helicopter parenting will not be mandatory.

Why it is necessary: Friendships are an important a part of childhood, specialists say. Not just for the self-evident causes that connecting with others feels good, but additionally as a result of they create necessary developmental alternatives that result in increased functioning in school and in life.

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“For younger folks, lots of how they’re constructing their id is thru their friends,” mentioned Karen VanAusdal, senior director of follow at CASEL, the Collaborative for Educational, Social and Emotional Studying. “Friendships are the locations the place we get to check out new concepts, follow new social expertise, department out of our consolation zone, and share our emotions.” As necessary as household bonds are, mates present a essential social outlet exterior the household, the place youngsters can have extra space to determine who they’re, she mentioned.

Listed here are a number of expert-approved methods to strategy it.

Begin at first

“Children have to follow small issues, like introducing themselves. Issues so simple as “Hey, my title is … What’s your title? Do you need to play with me?” VanAusdal mentioned. “Assist them with dialog starters, speak about apologizing and sharing, and have them follow with their household first.”

Final week, our 5-year-old — who tends to battle in new social conditions — had his first kindergarten playdate. As we have been getting ready him for assembly his new classmates the evening earlier than, I put this recommendation to work. Sadly, we had by no means explicitly taught him introduce himself earlier than.

He did not precisely ace it the subsequent day — in line with his studies, he forgot to share his title, or ask children their names — however that script in his head made him really feel extra comfy going as much as new children and asking them in the event that they wished to play.

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Mannequin curiosity

“I feel dad and mom can assist their children develop deeper friendships by asking their children questions on their mates,” mentioned Maurice J. Elias, professor of psychology at Rutgers College in New Jersey and coauthor of “Emotionally Clever Parenting.” “One of many causes friendships aren’t as deep, is as a result of lots of instances children are simply targeted on themselves.”

In case your children are like mine, they will not know the reply to half of the questions you ask them about their mates, new and outdated. However I’ve seen that our asking these questions frequently has made our kids excited to share any new particulars they study their mates with us. (Apart from the instances after they let me know there are secrets and techniques concerned, which is an indication of curiosity, too.)

Set bedtime back to prepare your child for kindergarten, study says

Modeling curiosity can happen in fictional realms as nicely. “Learn books or watch films collectively, after which speak about how the character is feeling. It’s a actually nice approach to have a dialog about emotions,” Kamenetz mentioned. In my expertise, children may not put the teachings they took from “Trolls World Tour” and their classroom dynamic collectively instantly, however these insights are inclined to seep out over time, and in significant methods.

You may as well speak about your individual life, which is not as thrilling as a film or TV present however has the added worth of being actual. “Share examples of how friendship is necessary for you, so younger folks start to grasp the worth of sustaining friendships over time,” VanAusdal mentioned.

Be open about potential mates

We dad and mom and caregivers, whether or not we notice it or not, are inclined to have concepts about who is an appropriate buddy for our kids, and who is not. Kamenetz suggests we broaden our concepts about what sort of mates our youngsters may make, and the place these mates may come from. “Some children are going to do higher with children which can be youthful, and a few may do higher with children who’re older. Be supportive of that, too.”

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Preach inclusivity. Be proactive about ensuring your children know that everybody belongs, and everyone seems to be potential buddy materials. “We are able to all consider methods of be higher allies and work on being extra inclusive of youngsters in our class who’re neurodivergent, or who come from completely different races or religions (than our household),” Kamenetz mentioned.

One bonus about discussing inclusivity in our home is that it has made our youngsters really feel extra comfy about their variations — whether or not it is a quirky pastime, or the truth that we’re Jewish. By envisioning a world that’s an inclusive place, they see themselves as belonging too, and enter social conditions just a little extra sure-footed.

Restrict playdate screentime

This one is an evergreen, however strive, if you happen to can, to encourage analog play.

“Friendships can get caught within the stage of parallel play for too lengthy, due to digital gadgets,” Elias mentioned. Parallel play, which is frequent in very younger youngsters, is when youngsters are taking part in subsequent to one another, however not participating with one another. This sort of play makes it arduous to attach via dialog, which is the bread and butter of lasting relationships, he mentioned.

For youths who may want a small dose of digital time to assist really feel comfy socializing once more, Elias suggests attempting to get them to play a recreation that’s collaborative. “Ensure there may be interplay and dialog, and they’re working collectively on one thing,” he mentioned.

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Take it gradual

Whether or not they have clinically recognized anxiousness dysfunction or they’re neurodiverse or just a little further delicate to the social stresses of the pandemic, there are some children who will want extra hand-holding or help than others in terms of repairing friendships and friend-making. An important factor is to take it gradual, specialists say.

28 fun backyard games for kids of all ages (CNN Underscored)

The entire above steerage might take longer, or occur in matches and begins or small doses, and that is OK. Getting the varsity concerned can assist, too. Kamentez mentioned she has heard of some colleges doing lunch bunches — small teams of youngsters who eat lunch with a instructor in a classroom, or some other place distant from the possibly overwhelming cafeteria.

“My youthful daughter was expressing angst about birthday events,” Kamentez mentioned. “However I knew it was not useful to only say to her ‘Hey, why do not you need to go to a celebration! They’re enjoyable,’ and as an alternative inform her that we simply should go for 5 minutes, after which we are able to go away.”

The primary time, they adopted that plan. However every consecutive time they stayed longer and longer, and her daughter had an increasing number of enjoyable — all on the tempo that labored for her.

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As Democrats Reel, Two Front-Runners Emerge in a Leadership Battle

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As Democrats Reel, Two Front-Runners Emerge in a Leadership Battle

Days before Republicans take full control of Washington, the Democratic National Committee is mired in an intramural fight that is less about how the party found itself locked out of power than about disputes over donor influence, personality conflicts and past slights and jealousies.

The two candidates who have emerged as front-runners to become D.N.C. chair, Ken Martin of Minnesota and Ben Wikler of Wisconsin, are both middle-aged white men from the upper Midwest and chair of their state parties whose politics are well within the Democratic mainstream.

Yet, as is common during internal Democratic squabbles, fault lines in the race have formed not over ideological differences but over arguments about party mechanics.

Mr. Martin, 51, is campaigning on a platform of returning power and resources to state parties, while his supporters are attacking Mr. Wikler, 43, as a tool of major donors and Democratic consultants in Washington.

Mr. Wikler’s supporters include a host of D.N.C. officials who have been perturbed at Mr. Martin for creating a group of state party chairs that has competed within the national committee for influence. They say that the Wisconsinite, who turned his state party into a fund-raising juggernaut, is the more dynamic figure who managed to turn state elections, like a 2023 Supreme Court contest, into national causes.

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At the same time, Democrats who are not directly involved in the D.N.C. race described the field to succeed the departing chair, Jaime Harrison, as uninspiring. Among the party’s top leaders, only Senator Chuck Schumer of New York, the majority leader, has weighed in on the race (for Mr. Wikler). Some Democrats see the D.N.C. contenders’ arguments about relationships with donors and their regular promises of more money for state parties as papering over a broader discussion of why Vice President Kamala Harris lost the election.

“Had Kamala or Biden made a call and said, ‘Look, we want to rally around X, Y and Z,’ I may have taken an interest in someone,” said Donna Brazile, a veteran D.N.C. member who has served in the past as interim party chair. “Other than giving state parties more resources, which is as old as the Republic itself, I haven’t heard anything new.”

Aides to President Biden and Ms. Harris declined to say whether either of them would back a candidate for party chair.

The post of D.N.C. chair is often described as one of the worst jobs in American politics — especially when Democrats do not hold the White House. Whoever wins the vote on Feb. 1 will be responsible for helping lead a party grappling with why it lost again to Donald J. Trump while keeping peace among a constellation of interest groups, donors, congressional committees, ambitious governors and state parties.

And when the 2028 presidential primary race begins in earnest, the D.N.C. chair will set the rules for the contest (including which state goes first and who qualifies for debates) and presumably try to remain neutral about whom Democrats choose as their nominee.

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Mr. Martin now has endorsements from “well over 100” of the 448 members of the D.N.C., according to Justin Buoen, a campaign adviser. He entered the race in November claiming support from 83 members. Another candidate, former Gov. Martin O’Malley of Maryland, has the backing of “more than 60” D.N.C. members, according to a spokesman, Chris Taylor. And James Skoufis, a New York state senator, said he was “the first choice” of 23 D.N.C. members.

Mr. Wikler’s team has not revealed his whip count.

None of the candidates have released a list of members supporting them, and if multiple contenders remain in the race, it appears unlikely that anyone will receive the majority required to win the election on the first ballot — leaving candidates jockeying to be a second choice should voters recalibrate their options.

Four other candidates have also qualified for four party-sanctioned candidate forums scheduled for this month, as well as for the Feb. 1 ballot. They are Nate Snyder, a former Homeland Security official in the Biden and Obama administrations; Marianne Williamson, the perennial presidential candidate; Quintessa Hathaway, who lost an Arkansas congressional race in 2022; and Jason Paul, a Massachusetts lawyer who self-published a book titled “Trench Warfare Politics in the Tinder Era.”

Jeff Weaver, who was a senior aide to Mr. Sanders’s 2016 and 2020 presidential bids and to Representative Dean Phillips’s long-shot 2024 primary challenge to Mr. Biden, has argued to allies that Mr. Wikler is too tied to the party’s major donors.

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Mr. Weaver has pointed in particular to the billionaire Reid Hoffman, whom he blames for Mr. Wikler’s attempt to keep Mr. Phillips off the Democratic presidential primary ballot last year in Wisconsin. The state’s Supreme Court subsequently ordered that Mr. Phillips’s name appear on the primary ballot, though he ended his campaign before Wisconsin voted.

“In my view, one of the most important roles of the new D.N.C. chair is to ensure we have a fair and open process in the 2028 Democratic primaries,” Mr. Weaver said. “We need to make sure we have someone at the D.N.C. who is a guardian of the fair process.”

Mr. Hoffman, who over the years has contributed millions of dollars to the Democratic Party of Wisconsin, is supporting Mr. Wikler, according to a person briefed on the billionaire’s deliberations.

Mr. Wikler’s other backers argue that he can help unite the party.

“The best thing about him, in my view, is he is a completely honest broker between the ideological factors in the party,” said Matt Bennett, a founder of Third Way, a centrist think tank that has backed Mr. Wikler and has a long relationship with Mr. Hoffman. “That has got to be the ideology of the D.N.C. chair: Get to 50 percent plus one, and then once you’re in office, go with God.”

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And yet still others look at both Mr. Wikler and Mr. Martin and see party leaders who underperformed in 2024. Ms. Harris lost Wisconsin to Mr. Trump, and in solidly Democratic Minnesota, the party lost control of the Legislature because one Democrat elected to the State House was found not to be a resident of his district.

The D.N.C. chair occupies a high-profile position but answers to a very small electorate. The D.N.C. members who will vote on the post are party insiders elected from their states, ex officio members based on other offices they hold and at-large members appointed over the years by national chairs.

There is little utility to advertising or appearing on cable television: Several D.N.C. members pointed out that Mr. Wikler probably swayed more votes by appearing last month on a radio show in Fargo, N.D., that was hosted by one of North Dakota’s D.N.C. members than he did by going on “The Daily Show” with Jon Stewart.

Yet some of the candidates’ messaging has not gone over well. Mr. Skoufis, an admitted long-shot candidate who has attacked the party and its strategies, sent holiday postcards to members. “Wishing you lots of cheer this holiday season” the front of the card read, and on the back: “Unless you’re a political consultant who’s been ripping off the D.N.C. Nothing but coal for them!”

Among those who received the postcards were D.N.C. members who have at times been on the party’s payroll and who were not amused.

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Other attempts by supporters to sway the party vote have been discouraged. Some donors who organized efforts to call D.N.C. members on behalf of either Mr. Martin or Mr. Wikler were asked to stop for fear the work would backfire, according to a person briefed on the conversations.

“Nobody is really addressing the elephant in the room, which is we need to have a knock-down, drag-out fight about what the future is going to look like,” said Mr. Snyder, one of the long-shot candidates. “I haven’t met anybody with overbearing enthusiasm for the process or a particular candidate, Ben or Ken.”

Theodore Schleifer contributed reporting.

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Europe is not a business backwater

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Europe is not a business backwater

This article is an on-site version of Free Lunch newsletter. Premium subscribers can sign up here to get the newsletter delivered every Thursday and Sunday. Standard subscribers can upgrade to Premium here, or explore all FT newsletters

Welcome to the first Free Lunch on Sunday. I’m Tej Parikh, the FT’s economics editorial writer, occasional columnist and Alphaville blogger.

Economists, investors and journalists all like to develop neat explanations to help make sense of the global economy. In this newsletter I will test them by presenting alternate narratives. Why? Well, it’s fun — and because it wards off confirmation bias.

Let’s begin with Europe’s unloved equities. We’ve read ad nauseam about how booming American stocks are leaving their transatlantic counterparts in the dust, while European industry faces several headwinds. It leaves an image of Europe as a corporate has-been. Are the continent’s companies really that bad? Here are some counterpoints:

The case for European stocks

America’s S&P 500 is in the midst of an artificial intelligence-led boom. The “Magnificent Seven” tech stocks make up around one-third of the index, and their market capitalisation surpasses the entire value of the French, British and German bourses combined. Tech accounts for around just 8 per cent of the Stoxx Europe 600. AI euphoria has mostly passed the continent by.

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But here’s something for perspective. Take Nvidia out of the S&P 500 and its total returns underperform the eurozone’s stock benchmark since this bull market began in late 2022.

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There are a few interpretations of this datapoint. First, the S&P 500’s bull run mostly reflects a bet on AI (particularly Nvidia). Second, despite less tech exposure and a slow-growing economy, eurozone stocks have actually performed quite well. (The “S&P 499” still includes the six remaining “Magnificents”).

Charles Schwab’s chief global investment strategist, Jeffrey Kleintop, who flagged the above chart, also points out that the eurozone’s forward price-to-earnings ratio trades at a historic discount to the S&P 500, creating scope for European valuations to rise further.

Either way, European equities clearly have an underlying appeal. Where is it coming from? Goldman Sachs calls the continent’s dominant listed companies “the Granolas”. The acronym covers a diverse group of international companies spanning the pharmaceutical, consumer and health sectors. Together, they account for about one-fifth of the Stoxx 600.

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Their performance against the Magnificent Seven has only recently diverged. The S&P 500 — which has around 70 per cent revenue exposure to the US — got a jolt following the election of Donald Trump.

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They are no corporate pushovers. Novo Nordisk produces the in-demand Wegovy weight loss drug. LVMH is unrivalled among luxury brands. ASML is a global specialist in chip design. Nestlé is an international food staple.

They didn’t end 2024 well. Novo Nordisk’s latest obesity drug had “disappointing” test results, LVMH is suffering from weak Chinese demand and tough macroeconomic conditions are eating into Nestlé’s bottom line. Still, they are established, broad businesses with global exposure, low volatility and strong earnings — and some are now undervalued.

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But Europe is more than the Granolas. Other companies are competitive across sectors, including in tech: Glencore, Siemens Energy, Airbus, Adidas, and Zeiss to name a few.

Small listed European businesses also tend to outperform their American counterparts. About 40 per cent of US small caps have negative earnings, compared with just over 10 per cent in Europe. The winner-takes-all dynamic may be stronger in the US, where tech behemoths suck capital and talent away from smaller companies. (This shouldn’t detract from genuine scaling challenges in Europe.)

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European corporates also rely more on relationship-based, illiquid funding, unlike in the US, where listed equity dominates. That may encourage longer-term corporate governance in Europe, but also highlights the challenges of comparing US and European stock performance (the liquid equity flows aren’t in the same league).

Regarding the Trump tariff threat, it’s not all disaster for European companies either. Stoxx 600 groups derive only 40 per cent of their revenues from the continent. (For measure, Frankfurt’s Dax rose close to 20 per cent last year, outperforming European peers, despite Germany’s lacklustre economy.) A stronger dollar would also boost the earnings of European companies with sizeable US sales.

In sum, the stellar returns of the US stock market do not mean that European companies are no good. Rather, investors are willing to pay a premium to get exposure to AI (and Trump 2.0) — one that is looking harder to justify.

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Other than the value proposition, there are catalysts that may lure more investors to European stocks: disappointing AI results, lower interest rates in Europe, Trump risks and further stimulus attempts in China.

And, even if its listed companies make a lot of their money outside Europe, there is a domestic upside, too.

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First, the European economy has arguably shown agility and resilience in the face of unprecedented shocks, for instance by pivoting away from cheap Russian energy. Total manufacturing production is largely unchanged since the beginning of Trump’s first term (pharma and computer equipment have picked up the slack from car production). So-called peripheral European economies are also performing better.

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Then there’s the longer-term domestic earnings and financing outlook. Though France and Germany face political instability, the rising urgency among policymakers to address the bloc’s subdued productivity growth is at least leading to a more encouraging discourse on reforms. There is growing consensus on the need for a true capital markets union to drive scale, deregulation to support innovation, a more pragmatic approach to free trade and China, a debt brake rethink in Germany, investment in digitalisation and lower energy costs. Mario Draghi’s report on European competitiveness has added momentum.

America’s financial, innovative and tech advantage is unquestionable. And whether Europe can actually execute important reforms is another matter. Yet the comparative surge of US stocks — given access to vast liquidity, tech expertise and exposure to AI — hides strengths in Europe’s listed businesses that I, at least, had under-appreciated. The continent has diverse, resilient and international companies with established use cases (while AI is still looking for one). That’s a solid platform for investors to exploit — and for policymakers to build on.

What do you think? Message me at freelunch@ft.com or on X @tejparikh90.

Food for thought

Age is a vital demographic statistic. But what if we are thinking about it wrongly? A fascinating working paper finds that chronological age is an unreliable proxy for physiological functioning, given vast differences in how ageing unfolds across people. The authors reckon our linear view of ageing could limit the ability of our economies to fully harness the benefits of rising longevity.

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Video New Orleans terror attack suspect made videos before the deadly rampage: Sources

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Video New Orleans terror attack suspect made videos before the deadly rampage: Sources

New Orleans terror attack suspect made videos before the deadly rampage: Sources

Sources tell ABC News that around 1 a.m. on New Year’s Day, suspect Shamsud-Din Jabbar made multiple videos in the rented pickup truck before the deadly terror attack in New Orleans.

January 5, 2025

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