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Emergency room nurse, lost to suicide, called US health care system her ‘abuser’ in haunting letter

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Emergency room nurse, lost to suicide, called US health care system her ‘abuser’ in haunting letter

This story discusses suicide. If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, please contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 or 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Tristin Kate Smith, a 28-year-old Ohio nurse, wrote a scathing letter to her “abuser” five months ahead of her August 2023 suicide.

The letter has since gone viral among nurses across the country — many of whom share Smith’s disillusionment with the U.S. health care system.

“I so desperately want to continue to help people, but I cannot stay in this abusive relationship,” wrote Smith, who worked as an emergency room nurse in Dayton, Ohio.

SUICIDE WARNING SIGNS ARE MISSED BY MOST AMERICANS, NEW SURVEY FINDS: IT’S ‘ALARMING’

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Her father, Ron Smith, discovered the letter, titled “A Letter to My Abuser,” on the nurse’s laptop two months after her death.

In October, it was published as a letter to the editor in The Oakwood Register, a local paper in Ohio, in an effort to raise awareness of how some nurses feel the system they serve is failing them.

“We cannot continue to expect health care workers to suffer in silence when they are at risk for a tragic yet preventable cause of death,” a New York psychiatrist told Fox News Digital. (iStock)

Smith, the youngest of six children in her family, battled depression but reportedly never sought professional help.

“Those in the health care field may avoid talking about their mental health struggles for fear of jeopardizing their licensure and negatively impacting their ability to continue serving in their current roles,” Dr. Lama Bazzi, a psychiatrist in private practice in New York City, told Fox News Digital in comments about the case and its wider ramifications.

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“It is vital to the survival of the health care field for workers to feel safe asking for help — and for help to be readily available to meet their needs before their mental health struggles rise to the level of suicidality,” she added.

“We cannot continue to expect health care workers to suffer in silence when they are at risk for a tragic yet preventable cause of death.”

‘Regret-filled hindsight’

In his own letter in The Oakwood Register, Smith’s father wrote that he now has “regret-filled hindsight” for not seeing the signs that his daughter was not OK.

She showered her “beloved” dog Calypso with “more dog enrichment toys and contraptions than a single pet store sells,” her father wrote.

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Nurse burnout man

Nurses were 18% more likely to die from suicide than those in the general population between 2007 and 2018, according to a 2021 report that included data from the CDC and the National Violent Death Reporting System. (iStock)

Smith had also posted affirmations and mantras throughout her home.

“She tried so hard to stay alive, but none of it was enough to stop the darkness,” her father said in the letter.

Shortages and safety concerns

“We — nurses and doctors — entered our professions with the noblest of ambitions: to help others who are hurting,” Dr. Mikkael Sekeres, a wellness expert and chief of the division of hematology of Sylvester Cancer Center at the University of Miami, told Fox News Digital.

NURSING ‘BURNOUT’: NURSES WORRY SHORTAGE WILL WORSEN IF MEASURES AREN’T TAKEN

“It’s difficult to do that when you hurt more than your patients do,” he went on. “When this happens, people leave medicine, or worse.”

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In her letter, Smith stated that a shortage of nurses made her feel overwhelmed. 

“Each day, you ask me to do more with less,” she wrote.

Stressed medical student

“Women are particularly vulnerable — differences in stress in workload, burnout and difficulty with work-life balance may all be implicated,” a psychiatrist said. (iStock)

In a statement to Fox News Digital, the American Nurses Association (ANA), headquartered in Maryland, said that the “negative emotions, mental health challenges and burnout” nurses are facing are “symptomatic of a broken health care system that far too often fails to provide nurses with continuous support and to address chronic work environment challenges.”

Recently, over 75,000 unionized Kaiser Permanente employees across six states — many of whom were front-line support staff — staged the largest walkout of health care workers in U.S. history over concerns of staff shortages.

Nurses were 18% more likely to die from suicide than those in the general population between 2007 and 2018.

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“National data about the state of nurses’ mental health and well-being indicates that they are suffering mental anguish or toxic emotions, and combating stigma as a health care professional seeking help,” the ANA added.

Smith’s letter also referenced that many nurses feel that hospital administrators are taking advantage of them.

Overwhelmed nurse

“National data about the state of nurses’ mental health and well-being indicates that they are suffering mental anguish or toxic emotions, and combating stigma as a health care professional seeking help,” according to the American Nurses Association. (iStock)

“You are a narcissist,” she wrote. “You use and exploit us to line your pockets, using the common citizen’s money for overpriced health care.”

She called for more workplace safety and for nurses to not receive blame for being assaulted on the job.

SUICIDE AND GENETICS: STUDY IDENTIFIES 12 DNA VARIATIONS THAT COULD INCREASE THE RISK

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“I remember the first time I heard about nurses getting hit,” she wrote.

“I remember that you asked them what they’d done — or didn’t do — to prevent it from happening.”

Suicide statistics

A recent report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) found that the number of health care practitioners experiencing workplace harassment, such as threats, bullying or verbal abuse from patients and coworkers, doubled between 2018 and 2022, leading to more anxiety, depression and burnout.

SUICIDE RATES REACH ALL-TIME HIGH IN US, PER CDC DATA: ‘SILENT PUBLIC HEALTH CRISIS’

“Studies show that health care workers are at a higher risk for suicide than the workers in other fields,” Bazzi told Fox News Digital.

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“Women are particularly vulnerable — differences in stress in workload, burnout and difficulty with work-life balance may all be implicated.”

nurse on strike pumps fist

Nurses shout slogans during a nursing strike outside Mount Sinai Hospital on Tuesday, Jan. 10, 2023, in New York. (AP Photo/Andres Kudacki)

Nurses were 18% more likely to die from suicide than the general population between 2007 and 2018, according to a 2021 report that included data from the CDC and the National Violent Death Reporting System.

Female nurses were 70% more likely to die by suicide than female physicians, and twice as likely to die by suicide compared to the general population.

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“I would make the case that most health care workers feel the system is broken,” Sekeres told Fox News Digital.

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“Some still have the energy to take it on, and to create solutions to problems their patients face by being innovative with workarounds to systemic problems, while others have given up and feel helpless to be advocates for their patients,” he added.

“I would make the case that most health care workers feel the system is broken.”

“It’s this learned helplessness that I believe is the greatest contributor to burnout in health care.”

The ANA is calling for action.

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“It’s time to listen to nurses and make them a priority,” the organization said. 

“Without this action, we will lose more bright lives like nurse Tristin Kate Smith and many others.”

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Insulin Prices Dropped. But Some Poor Patients Are Paying More.

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Insulin Prices Dropped. But Some Poor Patients Are Paying More.

Maricruz Salgado was bringing her diabetes under control. Thanks to a federal program that allowed health clinics that serve poor people to buy drugs at steeply discounted prices, she was able to pay less than $75 for all five of her diabetes medications every three months.

But in July, the cost of three of those drugs soared. Ms. Salgado, who does not have health insurance, suddenly faced costs of hundreds of dollars per month. She could not afford it.

Her doctor switched her to cheaper medicines. Within days of taking one of them, she experienced dizzy spells so severe that she said could barely keep up with her hectic daily schedule as a phlebotomist and an in-home caregiver. By the time she returned to the doctor in September, her blood sugar levels had ticked up.

“We were in a good place,” said Dr. Wesley Gibbert, who treats Ms. Salgado at Erie Family Health Centers, a network of clinics in Chicago that serves patients regardless of their ability to pay. “And then all the medicines had to change.”

The price hikes at the clinic happened for a reason that is symptomatic of the tangled web of federal policies that regulate drug pricing. In 2024, drug makers lowered the sticker price of dozens of common medications, which allowed them to avoid massive penalties imposed by the American Rescue Plan, the Covid relief package passed three years earlier. But that change backfired for low-income people like Ms. Salgado.

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The decision to make these medications more affordable for large swaths of patients has quietly created another problem: a severe financial hit to the clinics that are tasked by the federal government with caring for the country’s poorest people. These nonprofit clinics operate in every state and serve nearly 32.5 million people, or about 10 percent of the country’s population.

“It’s the law of unintended consequences,” said Beth Powell, the director of pharmacy at The Centers, which operates five community health clinics in the Cleveland area. Ms. Powell said that while many consumers benefited from the companies’ decision to lower prices, “for our folks, that is not the case.”

More than 1,000 community health clinics around the country rely on a decades-old federal program that requires drug companies to offer them deep discounts.

Under the 340B program, as it is called, companies typically sell their brand-name drugs to clinics at a discount, at 23 percent or more off the list price. The same discount scheme applies to state Medicaid plans. But if a company raises a drug’s list price above the rate of inflation, a penalty kicks in, forcing it to offer even deeper discounts to the clinics.

For years, that meant that every time a company raised a drug’s list price above inflation, community clinics paid less for it. Many drugs, including insulin, essentially became free.

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But the American Rescue Plan made a major change that hit drug companies with even larger penalties for raising prices. In January 2024, companies that continued to raise a drug’s price would have to pay state Medicaid plans every time those drugs were used, potentially costing the industry billions of dollars.

“That was a bridge too far” for the companies, said Antonio Ciaccia, a drug-pricing researcher who advises state governments and employers.

Manufacturers lowered the price of at least 77 drugs in 2023 and 2024, according to an analysis by a nonprofit that Mr. Ciaccia leads. The list includes widely used asthma drugs like Advair and Symbicort, as well as diabetes treatments like Victoza, which Ms. Salgado used before the change.

Once the pharmaceutical companies lowered their list prices, the inflation penalties evaporated. That meant community clinics had to start paying the usual discounts of 23 percent or more off the list price — far more than the pennies they used to pay.

“Unfortunately, the complexities of the U.S. health care system can reduce access and affordability for many,” Jamie Bennett, a spokeswoman for Novo Nordisk, which makes Victoza, said in a statement. “Even when we lower our prices, too often people don’t receive the savings — this is a problem.” She said the company also has patient assistance programs to make its products more affordable.

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David Bowman, a spokesman for the Health Resources and Services Administration, which oversees the 340B discounts, did not respond to questions about how community health clinics were affected by the lowered drug prices. He said that other recent policies, including directing Medicare to negotiate the price of drugs, had lowered drug costs for low-income patients.

Because of a six-month lag in the way that 340B discounts work, clinics were hit by the change last July. Some clinics began calling patients before their prescriptions expired, offering to switch them to less expensive medicines even though they sometimes had more serious side effects. Others decided to cover the higher out-of-pocket costs, which required dipping into already scarce reserves.

Ms. Salgado said a nurse from Erie called over the summer to tell her about the pricing changes. Until then, she had paid about $15 for a three-month supply of Victoza, which is injected daily to keep blood sugar down. After July, the cost rose to more than $300.

After a few weeks, Ms. Salgado adjusted to the replacement, Byetta, and her dizziness subsided. But the drug must be injected twice a day instead of once. And Ms. Salgado must now use a special pharmacy 20 minutes from her house to qualify for the federal discount on the two insulin drugs she was switched to, the result of increasingly strict rules that companies are imposing on health clinics.

Ms. Salgado, who is 39, said she is determined to avoid the fate of her mother, who died of diabetes complications at 54. But keeping up with frequent pharmacy visits and medication changes is tough. “Sometimes it does get to a point where it’s like, I just don’t want to do this anymore,” she said.

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The changes are also making it harder for community clinics to offer other services.

Under the 340B program, clinics buy the discounted drugs on behalf of their patients. When those patients have insurance, the clinics can then bill insurers for the regular, higher price, pocketing the difference. But now that spread — the difference between how much they pay for the drug and what insurance will cover — has dwindled. That has left clinics with less money to spend on services that are not otherwise covered by government grants or insurance, such as helping patients find housing.

At Valley View Health Center, a network of clinics that serves patients in rural Washington, the 340B money once financed a mental health program that employed eight therapists. In September, the clinic halted the program, laying off the therapists.

“It was such an abrupt change for us that it has definitely affected our ability to care for our patients the way that we needed to,” said Gaelon Spradley, the clinic’s chief executive.

Some patients who have seen costs go up have qualified for patient-assistance programs offered by drug makers. That was the case for Lorena Sarmiento, another patient at Erie Health who uses Lantus, an insulin pen. Last fall, after the 340B discount changed, she was quoted $490 at her pharmacy — the retail price for a box of insulin pens. Erie Health sent her to another pharmacy, which helped her sign up for a manufacturer’s coupon that lowered her cost to $35 per month.

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Doctors and pharmacists at several health clinics said such drug-company assistance programs can be hit or miss. Sometimes they last for a limited time or require that a patient reapply regularly. Patients often have to be legal residents of the United States or have a fixed address.

“It’s a lengthy process, and it’s a lot of hoop-jumping,” said Michael Lin, the chief of pharmacy operations at Family Health Centers in Louisville, Kentucky.

Ms. Sarmiento and her husband, Luis, spend about $500 per month on her medical needs, including special food, medications and a glucose monitor. They are no longer facing the highest insulin price, but their costs are still 10 times what they were just a few months ago, when they spent about $10 on three months’ worth of insulin.

Mr. Sarmiento said he tries not to complain. “You always have to look on the good side,” he said. “But lately, that’s been hard.”

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Nutritionists react to the red food dye ban: 'Took far too long'

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Nutritionists react to the red food dye ban: 'Took far too long'

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The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) announced a ban this week on red dye No. 3, or erythrosine, from foods and oral medications due to a potential cancer risk.

Food manufacturers have until Jan. 2027 to remove the dye (Red 3) from their products, and drug manufacturers have until Jan. 2028, the Associated Press reported.

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The dye was removed from cosmetics nearly 35 years ago for the same cancer-related concerns.

FDA BANS RED FOOD DYE DUE TO POTENTIAL CANCER RISK

Following the Wednesday announcement of the new ban, nutritionists and other health experts applauded the removal of the additives from America’s food supply.

Los Angeles-based registered dietitian nutritionist Ilana Muhlstein shared excitement about the FDA “finally” banning the synthetic dye that has been in candy, cereals and strawberry-flavored drinks for “far too long.”

Red 3 can be found in a variety of food products, most commonly candies and colorful sweets. (iStock)

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“What is wild is that this decision comes over three decades after the same dye was banned in cosmetics like lipstick because there was enough evidence linking it to cancer in animals,” she told Fox News Digital.

CALIFORNIA PROPOSES BILL TO BAN SOME FOOD PRODUCTS WHILE NUTRITIONISTS FRET ABOUT ‘GROSS’ INGREDIENTS

“For years, consumer advocacy groups and researchers have pushed for this change, citing not only cancer risks but also potential links to hyperactivity and ADHD in kids.”

Certified holistic nutritionist and The Power of Food Education founder Robin DeCicco, based in New York, commented that “it’s about time” Red 3 was banned.

Woman eating candy

A certified holistic nutritionist (not pictured) warned that red dye No. 3 appears in some products that “you’d never expect.” (iStock)

“It never made sense to me why the dye was taken out of lipsticks and blushes 30 years ago but has been allowed to be in our food supply,” she reiterated to Fox News Digital. “There has been evidence of the dye causing cancer in rats for decades.”

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“Our kids deserved better, and it’s frustrating that it took this long for action to be taken.”

While the ban is an “obvious win for public health,” she still feels “frustrated” that it took so long, she said.

“The FDA became aware of the risks in the 1980s, and other countries, like those in the EU, banned red dye No. 3 years ago,” she noted. “Yet big food manufacturers lobbied hard to delay this decision because these artificial dyes are cheap, convenient and profitable.”

strawberry milk

Red dye No. 3 is often used in strawberry flavoring, according to experts. (iStock)

The dye was commonly used in products that are primarily marketed to children, she noted, such as colorful lollipops, candies and breakfast cereals.

“Our kids deserved better, and it’s frustrating that it took this long for action to be taken,” Muhlstein added.

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‘Stay informed’

The ban is a “step forward,” but Muhlstein said it’s also a reminder to “stay informed about what we’re feeding our families.”

Red dye No. 3 is included in other products that aren’t so obvious, including some pre-packaged vegan meats, fruit cups, mini muffin snacks, mashed potatoes, yellow rice and sugar-free water flavors, according to experts.

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DeCicco encouraged consumers to always read the ingredient label and to look for natural replacements for these products.

Kid eating sugary cereal

The dye was commonly used in products that are primarily marketed to children, such as colorful lollipops, candies and breakfast cereals. (iStock)

“It’s not about deprivation or restriction – I always say it’s about eating foods with high-quality ingredients,” she said. “The ingredients matter more than anything else, and they’re out there.”

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“I have worked with many families with kids who have ADHD, and removing sugar and artificial food dyes and additives can in some cases lessen symptoms (as one part of treatment),” DeCicco added.

Colorful food without carcinogens

While nutritionists recommend that consumers stay away from foods that contain red dye or erythrosine on the label, there are healthier, natural alternatives to keep food fun.

pink cupcakes in a tray

Using alternatives for red dye like pomegranate juice or fruit powder can keep food fun, according to nutritionists. (iStock)

Muhlstein recommended adding 1 to 2 tablespoons of pomegranate juice to a baking recipe, such as vanilla cake, to give the batter a natural red hue.

She also suggested mixing crushed-up, freeze-dried strawberries into white frosting or whipped cream.

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“Beetroot powder, hibiscus powder and even mashed raspberries are great alternatives, too,” she added.

Fox News Digital’s Melissa Rudy contributed reporting. 

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Mom’s Gripes About Sister-in-Law Put Daughter in a Bind

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Mom’s Gripes About Sister-in-Law Put Daughter in a Bind

My mother is hypercritical of my brother’s wife, to the point that she blames my sister-in-law for my brother’s “failings” (not getting a better job, not taking better care of his health, etc.). It has gotten worse now that there are grandchildren. My mother constantly criticizes how my sister-in-law is raising the kids, who are lovely and adore their grandparents.

Although my mother will occasionally raise criticisms with my sister-in-law and brother, I am mostly her audience.

I have a great relationship with my sister-in-law, and when my mother goes off on one of her rants, I defend her. I tell my mother how lucky she is to have such wonderful grandchildren, and point out that my brother is an adult who makes his own decisions. This just leads to an argument between my mother and me.

When I finally told my mother how much it hurts me to hear her say these things about my sister-in-law, she said that she needed to air her frustrations with someone. I want to be there for my mother, but I don’t like being put in this position. How do I navigate this?

From the Therapist: The short answer to your question is that you can navigate this by no longer engaging in these conversations. But I imagine you already know this. What you might be less aware of is that you aren’t being “put in this position” of supportive daughter, protective sister-in-law and unwilling confidante. You’ve chosen it, and it’s worth examining why you’ve signed up for a job you don’t want — and what makes it hard to resign.

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Usually when we find ourselves repeatedly engaging in uncomfortable family patterns, it’s because they echo familiar roles from our childhood. It sounds as if you’re struggling with enmeshment, a relationship pattern in which boundaries between family members become blurred or are nonexistent.

Think of enmeshment as being like two trees that have grown so close together that their branches have become intertwined. While this might look like closeness, it actually prevents either tree from growing in a healthy way. In your case, your mother’s emotions and grievances have become so entangled with your own emotional life that it’s hard to distinguish where her feelings end and yours begin.

You mention wanting to “be there” for your mom even though these conversations hurt you. Many adult children who struggle to say no to their parents grew up serving as their parents’ emotional support system, or absorbing their parents’ feelings, even at the expense of their own. When you told your mother how much her venting hurt you, she responded not by acknowledging your feelings, but by asserting her need to “air her frustrations.” Her response reveals something important: She sees you as a vessel for her emotional overflow rather than as someone with valid feelings of your own. And yet, despite your hurt, you’re still more concerned about her feelings than yours.

You’re asking how to navigate this situation, but I think the deeper question is: How can you begin to value your own emotional needs?

You can start by reframing what it means to make a reasonable request, which is essentially what setting a boundary is. A boundary isn’t about pushing someone away. Instead, it’s about making a bid for connection. It’s saying:I want to feel good being close to you, but when you do X, it makes me want to avoid you. Help me come closer.”

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Establishing a boundary consists of three steps:

  • State the issue and the desire to come closer (what will make this possible): “Mom, I love you and want to support you, but these conversations about my sister-in-law put me in an impossible position and make me want to avoid talking with you, which I know isn’t what either of us wants. I’m happy to talk about other things together, but in order to keep our relationship strong, I need this topic to be off limits.”

  • Set the boundary (what you will do): “If you’re struggling with their choices, I’m happy to support you in finding a therapist who can help you work through these feelings. But if you bring up these frustrations with me, I’m going to end the conversation and we can talk another time about other things.”

  • Hold the boundary (do what you say): A boundary isn’t about what the other person will or won’t do. A boundary is a contract with yourself. If you say you’ll end the conversation when your mom brings up your sister-in-law, you need to hold that boundary every single time. If you end the conversation only 90 percent of the time, then why would the other person honor your request when 10 percent of the time, you can’t honor it yourself? Honoring your request might sound like: “Mom, I’m going to end the conversation now because I’m not comfortable talking about my sister-in-law. I love you, and we’ll talk later.”

If you start to feel guilty, remember that just because someone sends you guilt doesn’t mean you have to accept delivery. Remind yourself that when you become your mother’s outlet for criticism of your sister-in-law, you’re participating in a cycle that strains loyalties and causes you personal distress. And keep in mind that being a good daughter means setting boundaries that encourage our parents to grow, rather than enabling patterns that harm our family relationships.

Want to Ask the Therapist? If you have a question, email askthetherapist@nytimes.com. By submitting a query, you agree to our reader submission terms. This column is not a substitute for professional medical advice.

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