Connect with us

Washington

Advice | Miss Manners: I keep stumbling into proposals

Published

2 years ago

on

Advice | Miss Manners: I keep stumbling into proposals


Dear Miss Manners: Twice, now, I have become an accidental intruder on a couple’s proposal during my regular walking excursions (after work and on weekends).

The first occurred on the campus of the university where I am employed, near a pad-mounted transformer and busy roundabout. I was willing to chalk my unfortunate presence up to his poor choice of venue. The second, however, occurred in a public park near an admittedly picturesque waterfall. On both occasions, I elected to politely avert my eyes and move along as hurriedly as possible without becoming a distraction, and to minimize any chances of accidental photobombing.

As this happenstance teeters dangerously on the edge of becoming a pattern, though, I thought it prudent to request a professional opinion: When such an intimate moment is made a public spectacle, what is the mannerly course of action for passersby? Was I correct in my choice to look away and swiftly move on? Should I instead stop and wait for them to finish before proceeding, or return in the direction from which I came?

Or, God forbid, am I obligated to offer my congratulations (or, I suppose, condolences, as the case may be) to these total strangers? Any thoughts are appreciated.

Advertisement

Some thoughts might be: Why are they making a public spectacle of themselves? Wouldn’t such an important intimate moment be best savored in private between the two of them? Doesn’t photographing the moment inspire them to perform roles instead of reacting naturally? Do they believe that video will not provoke ridicule in any future children they might have?

Oh, well. Miss Manners realizes how difficult it would be nowadays to convince people that real life is more rewarding than a dramatized version.

So, yes — as much as you can, keep out of the way and out of photo range. And while a cheery “Congratulations!” would be fine if you feel so inclined, it is not obligatory. You have not been hired as an extra in these public dramas.

Dear Miss Manners: My husband is an excellent cook and usually prepares and serves most, or all, of the meal when we invite people over for dinner. I participate in a variety of ways, including finding recipes, making suggestions about the menu, and doing some chopping or stirring, depending on what we are making. I also tidy up the house beforehand and set the table.

Surprisingly (to me), when guests leave, they often thank my husband for the dinner but not me, as though I am not one of the hosts. I think that it would be more appropriate for guests to thank both of us. Also, I wonder if it would make a difference if the genders were reversed.

Advertisement

While you presumably do not want to hear your guests saying, “Thank you so much for tidying up,” Miss Manners agrees that they are remiss. Whatever you do or do not do, you are the hostess. But while there may be a gender factor here, there is also, nowadays, an unfortunate preoccupation with food as the most important element of a social event. So your guests may be thinking of this as a meal out, rather than a convivial evening.

New Miss Manners columns are posted Monday through Saturday on washingtonpost.com/advice. You can send questions to Miss Manners at her website, missmanners.com. You can also follow her @RealMissManners.



Source link

Related Topics:
Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Washington

Inside Woodlawn Cemetery’s mission to preserve history

Published

16 hours ago

on

June 24, 2026

By

Inside Woodlawn Cemetery’s mission to preserve history


The iron gate to Woodlawn Cemetery is almost always locked shut, but Toni White-Richardson was more than happy to let News4 inside.

As president of the Woodlawn Cemetery Perpetual Care Association, she was excited to talk about what makes this resting place so special.

“It is major D.C. history, first. Then it’s also major Black history, second,” White-Richardson said.

More than 30,000 people, mostly African Americans, are buried among the 22 acres of Woodlawn Cemetery, which opened in Southeast D.C. in 1895. And like so many cemeteries that date back to the 1800s, particularly African American cemeteries, this one has fallen into disrepair, is overgrown and has headstones tumbled over, like those of Wilhelmina and her husband James, and Eliza Spencer, a mother who died in 1887.

Advertisement

“Let me do a very upfront disclaimer,” White-Richardson said. “We have no idea where these stones go. And when we looked at the grid, it became even clear as mud, it became less clear as to where these stones should really go. Unfortunately, when we look back, we can tell there was a plan, but we could see we never got totally completed. Even back then, there are no markers saying this is Section H or this is Section G or this is 102 and this is, none of that.”

One of the most notable Washingtonians laid to rest here is John Mercer Langston, Virginia’s first Black congressman.

“Langston University came one year because they had a grand reunion in D.C., and we arranged for them to come to see […] John Mercer Langston, the university that was named after this man,” White-Richardson said.

And Blance Bruce, the first Black U.S. senator to serve a full term and register of the treasury, is also buried in the cemetery.

“He’s the signature on our dollar bill, you know, back in the late 1800s,” White-Richardson said. “So, oh, it’s history. It’s capital letters. No getting around it.”

Woodlawn is also the resting place of several of the original founders of two of the country’s most prominent Black sororities, Alpha Kappa Alpha and Delta Sigma Theta. Both organizations volunteer to help with clean ups.

The Perpetual Care Association recently received a grant from the D.C. Office of Planning to help with upkeep of the grounds and preserving the history here.

“These are important individuals who’ve made contributions to the District a century ago, but today still their history and their stories reverberate and really influence the trajectory of our city,” said Anita Cozart, director of the D.C. Office of Planning.

Advertisement

The cemetery tucked away off Benning Road is only open to the public five days a year, but groups can request tours anytime. The next chance to visit Woodlawn when it will be open to the public is Labor Day.

They’re always looking for volunteers and donors to help with the upkeep of this sacred ground.



Source link

Advertisement
Continue Reading

Washington

Parsing Trump’s claims about Washington’s reflecting pool

Published

1 day ago

on

June 24, 2026

By

Parsing Trump’s claims about Washington’s reflecting pool


US President Donald Trump wanted to mark the US’s 250th birthday with a renovated Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool on the National Mall.

The makeover, including a new coat of “American Flag blue,” cost taxpayers $16 million (€14.1 million).

But the water is covered in green algae. The blue paint is already peeling. Trump has blamed vandals, while his critics question the project’s transparency and cost.

DW’s Brent Goff and Washington correspondent Janelle Dumalaon unpack the whole fiasco.

Advertisement



Source link

Continue Reading

Washington

Social media reacts to former BYU star AJ Dybantsa going No. 1 in 2026 NBA draft

Published

2 days ago

on

June 23, 2026

By

Social media reacts to former BYU star AJ Dybantsa going No. 1 in 2026 NBA draft


Former BYU basketball star AJ Dybantsa fulfilled his dream of going No. 1 overall in the 2026 NBA draft.

The Washington Wizards selected Dybantsa with the first pick.

Immediately after the pick, reactions poured in on social media about the Wizards drafting Dybantsa.

Social media reactions to the Washington Wizards selecting BYU star AJ Dybantsa

Mitch Harper is a BYU Insider for KSL and hosts the Cougar Tracks Podcast daily on KSL Sports YouTube and KSL NewsRadio (SUBSCRIBE). Harper also co-hosts Cougar Sports Saturday (12–3 p.m.) on KSL NewsRadio.

Follow Mitch’s coverage of BYU athletics in the Big 12 Conference on X (formerly Twitter) and Instagram: @Mitch_Harper.

Want more coverage of BYU sports? Take us with you wherever you go.

Download the new and improved KSL Sports app from Utah’s sports leader. Allows you to stream live radio and video, keeping you up to date on all your favorite teams.

Advertisement





Source link

Continue Reading
Advertisement

Trending