My wife and I were sitting in our living room, engaging in the Mobius strip of Netflix scrolling. We had survived the eight months of winter and relished the 23 hours of spring. The weather alert on our computer advised that the night was to be clear with a full moon.

“Hey, Jane. Let’s take a romantic walk. It’s supposed to be lovely tonight.”

“Let me just grab my coat.”

“Jane, it’s June.”

“Right. I’ll grab a scarf, too.”

We stepped outside, and to our surprise, it was completely overcast. I guess the weather forecast was wrong. But then I heard the ominous, spine-tingling humming.

“Jane, run for it!”  But I was too late. The cloud of mosquitoes had already latched onto her and was airlifting her back to Half Moon Lake. 

As anyone who lives here knows, we have an overabundance of blood-sucking vermin in Wisconsin. In fact, Eau Claire would be an ideal place for a medieval barber to practice medicine. I imagine it would go something like this:

Barber: What seems to be the problem?

Peasant: It’s my son. He’s got a touch of the Black Death.

Barber:  Well, that’s going around. What your son needs is a good blood letting.

Peasant:  That makes sense. Should I bring him to your office?

Barber: No need. Just have him take a hike at Lowes Creek Park near sunset. Here’s your bill. You owe me two chickens and a dead cat.

Peasant: Dead cat? Why do you need a dead cat?

Barber: I can’t tell you. I’m not allowed to reveal the secrets of the pharmaceutical industry.

It makes me wonder why I still live in Eau Claire. Recently, my wife and I flew out to California to visit our friends, Lew and Mary Ann. They didn’t have any mosquitoes. They had clouds of Monarch butterflies. Butterflies! I was wandering under their lemon trees while they and my wife lounged on the deck, unbothered by any biting insects. As I joined them on their deck, I started to strip down.

Lew: Um, what are you doing?

Me: I walked through some tall grass, so you know the routine.

Lew: No. No, I do not.

Jane: I have to look for bullseyes.

Lew: Bullseyes on his back?

Jane: Yes.

Lew: Little paranoid, aren’t you?

Me: Not where ticks are concerned.

Lew: Oh, we don’t have ticks.

Me: You … don’t have ticks? So, no Lyme’s Disease?

Lew: Lyme’s disease? Is that something you get from drinking too many margaritas?

I found their ignorance of blood-borne pathogens wonderfully refreshing. I looked at all of the pluses for living in California: no winters, close to the Pacific Ocean, and fewer chances of dying from a lingering illness. I had to move to California!

Me: I want to be your new neighbor. How much is a house here?

Lew: Our house is worth $1.3 million.

Me: $1.3 million? But, but, your house is SMALLER than our house in Wisconsin! 

Lew: That’s the going rate.

We flew back to Wisconsin with a greater appreciation for our hometown after all. Jane and I sat on the back patio of our house that was one-eighth the price of a house in California. A mosquito landed on my tricep and plunged his proboscis into my soft tissue. I smiled at her benevolently and said, “God bless you, my little housing market deflator.” SMACK. “Rest in peace.”

A Minnesota man who once fought for the Islamic State group in Syria after becoming radicalized expressed remorse and wept in open court Thursday as he was sentenced to 10 years in federal prison.

Abelhamid Al-Madioum, 27, cooperated with federal authorities ahead of Thursday’s hearing, which prosecutors factored into their recommendation for a lower sentence than the statutory maximum of 20 years.

KENTUCKY MAN JOINS ISIS, PLANNED ON SHOOTING PLANES, MARTYRDOM, DOJ SAYS

U.S. District Judge Ann Montgomery said among the cases she has presided over in her 40 years on the bench, Al-Madioum’s was “extraordinary.” She cited his confounding path from a loving Minnesota home to one of the world’s most notorious terror organizations and his subsequent collaboration with the government he betrayed.

When Al-Madioum rose to speak before being sentenced, he thanked the U.S. government for giving him another chance. He then turned to address his parents and two young sons, who were rescued from a Syrian orphanage and brought to America with the help of federal authorities.

“I know I put you through so much, and I did with the belief that it was my religious duty,” Al-Madioum said while fighting back tears. “That’s no excuse. My first duty should have been to you.”

Al-Madioum, a naturalized U.S. citizen, was among several Minnesotans suspected of leaving the U.S. to join the Islamic State group, along with thousands of fighters from other countries worldwide. Roughly three dozen people are known to have left Minnesota to join militant groups in Somalia or Syria. In 2016, nine Minnesota men were sentenced on federal charges of conspiring to join IS.

But Al-Madioum is one of the relatively few Americans who have been brought back to the U.S. who actually fought for the group. According to a defense sentencing memo, he’s one of 11 adults as of 2023 to be formally repatriated to the U.S. from the conflict in Syria and Iraq to face charges for terrorist-related crimes and alleged affiliations with IS. Others received sentences ranging from four years to life plus 70 years.

Prosecutors had asked for a 12-year sentence, arguing that Al-Madioum’s suffering did not make his crimes any less serious. Assistant U.S. Attorney Andrew Winter said Al-Madioum self-radicalized online and helped IS, also known as ISIS, carry out its goals.

“Young men just like him all over the world … allowed ISIS to flourish,” Winter said.

Manvir Atwal, Al-Madioum’s attorney requested a seven-year sentence. She said Al-Madioum was taken in as an impressionable teenager by a well-oiled propaganda machine. He rejected extremist ideology years ago and had helped the government in other terrorism cases, which prosecutors confirmed.

Montgomery opted for a 10-year sentence, weighing sentencing guidelines with Al-Madioum’s cooperation and letters on his behalf, including one from an unnamed former U.S. ambassador. He has already served over five years and might get credit for that time, Atwal said.

Al-Madioum grew up in the Minneapolis suburb of St. Louis Park in a loving and nonreligious family, the defense memo said. He joined IS because he wanted to help Muslims he believed were being slaughtered by Syrian President Bashar Assad’s regime in that country’s civil war. IS recruiters persuaded him “to test his faith and become a real Muslim.”

Al-Madioum was 18 in 2014 when IS recruited him. The college student slipped away from his family on a visit to their native Morocco in 2015. Making his way to Syria, he became a soldier for IS until he was maimed in an explosion in Iraq. His leg was shattered and his arm had to be amputated. Unable to fight, he used his computer skills to serve the group.

While still a member of IS, he married and had children with two women.

He had thought his second wife and their daughter had died. But in court Thursday, Al-Madioum said he had heard there is a chance she and their daughter might still be alive. That possibility remains under investigation, Atwal said.

Al-Madioum’s first wife died in his arms after she was shot in front of him by either rebel forces or an IS fighter in 2019, the defense said. Al-Madioum said in court that he dug a trench and buried her.

The day after that shooting, he walked with his sons and surrendered to the Kurdish-led Syrian Democratic Forces, which held him under conditions the defense described as “heinous” for 18 months until the FBI returned him to the U.S.

He pleaded guilty in 2021 to providing material support to a designated terrorist organization. His sons were eventually found in a Syrian orphanage, the culmination of what he and Montgomery described as a unique effort from U.S. diplomats and other officials.

Al-Madioum’s parents were awarded custody of his sons after they arrived in America. Sitting in the court’s gallery Thursday, his sons, ages 7 and 9, sat on their grandparents’ laps and smiled at their father as he turned to face them.

At least two of the victims were children, officials said. Authorities initially said they believed as many as 10 people had gunshot wounds from the shooting in Rochester Hills, but that number was lowered later on after they checked with area hospitals.

Oakland County Sheriff Mike Bouchard said a suspect was contained in a home nearby, and law enforcement had it surrounded. Rochester said via Facebook that the person took their own life.

Bouchard provided the information about the 8-year-old who was in critical condition during a nighttime news conference, where he also said that two of the boy’s relatives, including a 4-year-old, had also been shot.

He added that the first deputies who arrived at the scene immediately began providing first aid including tourniquets.

Officers also were able to quickly come up with a likely address, and a car matching the suspect’s vehicle was at the residence.

The shooting happened just after 5 p.m. at a city park featuring a recreation area with a non-slip surface where people can turn on sprays and fountains of water to play in. Bouchard said it the shooting appeared to be random, with the shooter driving up to the park, walking to the splash pad and firing as many as 28 times, stopping multiple times to reload.

A handgun and three empty magazines were recovered, the sheriff said.

Police cordoned off the scene of the shooting with tape, and dozens of yellow evidence markers lay on on the ground among colorful folding chairs.

In a social media post, authorities said there was still an active crime scene and asked people to avoid the area. Bouchard said it was safe for those sheltering in the park to head home.

Police heard the 911 call reporting the shooting as it came in, Bouchard said, because the agency uses a service that simultaneously sends emergency calls to first responders. An officer was at the scene within two minutes, he said.

Rochester Hills is about 15 miles south of Oxford, where in 2021 a 15-year-old fatally shot four high school students.

Saturday’s shooting came at the end of the first full week of summer vacation for students attending Rochester Community schools.

Bouchard called it “a gut punch” for the county.

“We’ve gone through so many tragedies,” the sheriff said. “You know, we’re not even fully comprehending what happened at Oxford. And, you know, now we have another complete tragedy that we’re dealing with.”

Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer said on the social platform X that she was heartbroken to learn of the shooting and was in touch with local officials.