Lifestyle
Inside L.A.'s invite-only mom group that’s better than Google
At first, Cathlene Pineda was reluctant to join the Atwater Village Moms’ Facebook group.
The jazz pianist and composer doesn’t particularly like Facebook, and she’s wary of online communities. But she acquiesced because, as she put it, “Some other moms were like, ‘You have to be part of this group.’”
After joining in 2021, she realized it had benefits. When she needed a trustworthy mechanic, the Atwater Moms told her who to call. When she was ready to sleep train her baby, they recommended books like “The Happy Sleeper” and “The No-Cry Sleep Solution.” When she went to Vegas, they told her to stay at the Cosmopolitan.
Then, a few months into her membership, she was diagnosed with late-stage breast cancer. She had a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old at home and couldn’t imagine how she would get through the long, involved treatment her doctors prescribed. Not sure what else to do, she turned to the Atwater Moms for help.
“I was expecting what I usually got, which is a few responses,” she said. Instead, more than 90 women commented on her post. They shared lists of specialists and free resources, including how to sign up for meal services and get a one-time cash grant. But for Pineda, their validation helped the most.
“Some of the women who commented had gone through this when their kids were the same age as my children and they said, ‘You can do this,’” she said. “I didn’t even really need the advice. I just needed to feel real.”
Founded in 2011 as a way for new mothers in Atwater Village to meet each other, the Atwater Village Mom’s Group has evolved over time to become a crowdsourcing powerhouse with more than 6,000 members scattered across L.A. and around the world. One member in a recent post called it the best advice group on the Internet. Another described it in an interview as “Yelp times 100.”
“Obviously I still Google things, but before I do, I ask myself: ‘Can I ask Atwater Village Moms?’” said Swati Kapila, an actress and mother of a 2-year-old. “People jokingly call it Moogle all the time — Mom Google. It’s mama mutual aid.”
If you have questions about summer camps, the going rate for nannies, the best local preschools or where to go for date night — the Atwater Moms have answers. They’ve helped one another find gifts for their partners, swapped recommendations for the best birthday party parks and compared experiences with pediatricians, dentists and kid barbers. At the same time, they’ve supported each other through life’s biggest challenges, many of which extend far beyond birthing and caring for a child.
Daryl Dickerson, a mother of two who teaches gardening at a charter school, bought a car from a mom in the group. It was the first step in her divorce. When Sharon Sognalian’s apartment rental fell through, the legal staffer and mother of a 12-year-old moved into another member’s back house.
Tanya Reyes, a mother of three who teaches at a school for pregnant and parenting teens in Echo Park, said members of Atwater Moms have donated strollers, car seats and used clothes to her students. Any time she posts her Amazon wishlist to the group, packages soon appear at the school.
“This community has allowed me to serve my community of students,” she said. “It’s moms supporting moms.”
“People jokingly call it Moogle all the time — Mom Google. It’s mama mutual aid.”
— Swati Kapila, Atwater Village Moms member
Reyes has received other types of support from the group as well. When she recently posted about the challenges of getting her “neurospicy” kid out of the house each morning, she got 87 responses. Like Pineda, she said her fellow moms’ solidarity was even more valuable than their advice. “It’s nice to know I’m not crazy, this is really happening.”
Brandi Jordan, a parenting specialist who has worked as a doula for celebrities like Julia Stiles, Mandy Moore and Megan Fox, never expected this kind of communal support when she started Atwater Village Moms back in 2011, soon after Facebook first introduced its groups feature. At the time she was running a boutique called the Cradle Company that catered to Atwater’s moms and babies. Her oldest son, now 16, was just 3.
She and another mom, Leonora Pitts, started the group to connect with other women with babies in the area and to coordinate occasional meet-ups at the park. She’d heard of similar groups on the Westside but didn’t think they would be her vibe. “I’m not trying to figure out how to get my baby’s eyebrows waxed,” she said. “But good on you if that’s your thing.”
Initially Jordan and her co-founder aimed for 25 women to join Atwater Village Moms, but word spread and interest soared. Then they thought the group might top out at 200, but it quickly surpassed that number too. The criteria for joining then were the same as they are now: You must be a parent, identify as female or nonbinary and — though you’re not required to live in Atwater Village, or even L.A. — you must be invited by another member to join. (A discussion about whether men can join the group is ongoing, but for now they remain excluded.)
“This community has allowed me to serve my community of students. It’s moms supporting moms.”
— Tanya Reyes, Atwater Village Moms
Jordan doesn’t have demographic data on the group, but she said that, historically, members tend to be white and affluent and live on the Eastside. But in recent years, there’s been a shift. “We’ve had more women of color joining,” said Jordan, who is Black. “As people have seen it is a safe space, they are sharing with more women of color.”
Atwater Village Moms has gone through different phases over the years. In the early days, discussions centered around places to go with small kids and member meet-ups. As time went on, it grew into a general resource for any question about L.A. and beyond. The posts became more political after the 2016 election and again after what Jordan describes as “the George Floyd era,” when the moms in the group began more openly discussing race.
“It was difficult, but as a group we didn’t give up,” she said. “We have this idea that this place is not safe — it’s brave. We’re going to make mistakes, we’re going to get over it, we’re going to talk about it and we’re going to hear different sides. And we started making rules to support that.”
Before joining, the group members have to agree to a set of rules that includes respecting everyone’s privacy (no screenshotting posts), refraining from hate speech or bullying and abstaining from deleting a post because it’s drawing unwanted comments (this is grounds for removal).
“Anything that affects women and mothers, you can talk about in the group and we don’t limit that conversation,” Jordan said. “But we also tell people you have to understand that people are going to voice opposite opinions and you have to be OK with that.”
Lauren Amaro, a professor of communication at Pepperdine University who has studied online mom groups (and who recently found a general practitioner on a moms Facebook group in Camarillo), said it’s rare for a group the size of Atwater Moms to be seen in such a positive light by its members. These communities can devolve into mom-shaming that is especially painful for new parents.
“The fact that women are willing to trust other women on the internet is both a beautiful and necessary thing and sometimes, depending on the topic and context, unwise,” she said. “There is a really wide range of how these mom groups function.”
Careful moderation, along with clear, consistent rules, can help groups like Atwater Moms thrive, she said.
Liza Sacilioc, a communications specialist who has been a member of the group for more than a decade, said Jordan is a skilled moderator. “Brandi does a really good job seeing people and setting the ground rules without it feeling like a slap on the hand,” she said. “We’re a very respectful group.”
“We have this idea that this place is not safe — it’s brave. We’re going to make mistakes, we’re going to get over it, we’re going to talk about it and we’re going to hear different sides.”
— Brandi Jordan, co-founder and moderator of Atwater Village Moms
Three years after she joined Atwater Moms, Pineda is grateful for all she’s gained as a member. A self-described introvert, she said it wasn’t like her to post about her cancer diagnosis to a group of 6,000 people. But somehow, doing it on Atwater Village Moms felt safe.
“For me to share that, I had to feel that they would respond appropriately and helpfully, and in so many Facebook groups that’s not the case,” she said. “Looking back at some of those comments, they were like: ‘I have no advice, I’m just sending you love and holding you close in my heart.’ That’s it. Everyone was so respectful.”
And today, with her cancer in remission, she often finds herself responding to other women’s questions, whether they’re about cancer, child-rearing or just life in general.
“You want to help someone if you can,” she said. “It takes five minutes to say, ‘This worked for me, I don’t know if it will work for you.’ And also: You’re doing a great job.’”
Lifestyle
‘Disclosure Day’ star Josh O’Connor received a ‘genius’ late-night text from Spielberg
In Disclosure Day, Josh O’Connor plays a cybersecurity expert who has proof that aliens are among us.
Niko Tavernise/Universal Pictures
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Niko Tavernise/Universal Pictures
Actor Josh O’Connor says one of the best bits of acting advice he ever received came in the midst of filming Disclosure Day, the latest summer blockbuster from director Steven Spielberg.
In the film, O’Connor plays a cybersecurity expert who gets hold of the government’s proof that aliens are among us and decides the rest of the world has a right to see the evidence. O’Connor wasn’t sure how vulnerable to make the character. Then he received a late-night text from Spielberg, saying: “The door is on the latch, just push.”
“And it unlocked the whole scene for me,” O’Connor says. “It’s like the emotions, just push the door, let it out. And I was like, ‘It’s genius. It’s beautiful. It’s poetical.’”
The next day on set, O’Connor thanked Spielberg for the feedback, and the director admitted that the message had been a misfire: It was an instructional text, meant for his wife as he was headed to bed. “But he killed two birds with one stone, and he doesn’t mind me telling the story. He likes the story, so it’s OK,” O’Connor says.

O’Connor previously starred in the British film God’s Own Country and he won an Emmy Award for his portrayal of Prince Charles in The Crown. Disclosure Day is his first foray into the world of big-budget blockbusters — but he says the experience wasn’t so different from some of the smaller projects he’s worked on.
“The actual day-to-day making of a movie, the collaborative nature of making a movie is pretty much exactly the same. … How do we portray this story in the best possible way?” he says. “[Spielberg] kind of keeps his set small. It feels like a sacred space for performance.”
Interview highlights
On his practice of making a scrapbook for every character he plays
The scrapbook thing comes right back from when I … made God’s Own Country, so it was a good like 12, maybe 12 years ago now. … You could call it a scrapbook or a kind of character Bible, a kind of a manual for how to access this character’s memory. So if you’re struggling with a scene, trying to get into the psychology of this fictional character, it’s like, well, let’s look at the scrapbook. …
I’ve used it for pretty much every character I’ve played since, but the form of this one [for Disclosure Day] was slightly different because we were shooting here in New York and I had an apartment in Manhattan … [with] this huge wall and I just started sketching images. I had this idea that Daniel had a sort of memory somewhere lodged in the kind of recesses of his mind of visions he’d had when he was a child and so these charcoal drawings became a kind of obsession … kind of inspired by the character in Close Encounters — you know, someone who uses art to understand their mind. … I did a lot of that and I put them up on the wall. And then I invited [co-star] Eve Hewson over for dinner to meet her and to chat about the film. And she walked in and she looked so mortified by this quite alarming wall, which looked like a crime scene. And so … I sort of very quickly took that down.
On his portrayal of Prince Charles in the Netflix series The Crown
At the beginning, I had a phone call from my agent saying that they’d like to meet you to play Prince Charles in The Crown, and my initial reaction was no, thank you. … I believe in a more equal society and the construct of a monarchy makes that very difficult. … [Also] I didn’t have an interest in the royal family, didn’t necessarily read much about them. …

But [the series creator] Peter Morgan said this thing to me, which really helped and unlocked a lot for me. He said … “Here is a character who is waiting for his mother to die in order for his life to take meaning.” And that was kind of enough for me to get my teeth into, and then from there it was about constantly coloring everything he does with the same sort of textures that you or I might feel around family, which is: How do you get the respect and the acclaim of your parents? How do we please our parents?
On working on a farm in order to prepare for his role in the 2017 film God’s Own Country
I moved up to Yorkshire in the North of England and I worked on … the farm that we were gonna shoot on. … I had this period where I was just there [and] there were no film cameras, nothing. There was no crew. I was there living and working with John, the farmer. And then at some point, the film crew turn up and I’m no longer his farm hand. I’m an actor. I have a job to do. But that didn’t stop John. … He was like, “Look at these annoying film guys who’ve just taken away my farmhand.” And so there’ll be days where I’d be filming, shooting a scene and then they’d call “Cut,” and John would be sort of waiting at the barn door, kind of a little hacked off that he’d lost his guy, and he was like, “Get back to work.” And so then I’d, you know, birth a lamb and then wash my hands and do another take.
On the grief he feels when a project wraps up
Even when I was a kid doing like school plays, I’d finish the play and my mom would always be like, “You know, he’ll be sick, he will get ill.” And I did, I’d always get ill. Pretty much, without fail, every job I’ve done in my career, I get sick at the end. And I think there is a grief that happens. You have to fall in love with this character, and you have to combine a bit of yourself and a bit of this fiction, and then you live as that character for two, three months, sometimes six months. And then it ends.
Lauren Krenzel and Nico Gonzalez Wisler produced and edited this interview for broadcast. Bridget Bentz and Beth Novey adapted it for the web.
Lifestyle
A new L.A. Times feature: Now you can save our expert recs for your next adventure
Whether you’re looking for the best restaurants L.A. has to offer, a fun and affordable way to spend your day or a new adventure in one of our city’s iconic neighborhoods, the Los Angeles Times has you covered.
You can now make our guides your own by saving individual recommendations for later — mixing and matching from food to fun and everything in between — with the confidence that your choices are backed by L.A. Times experts.
Saving is simple. Visit any of our local guides, find something that interests you and look for the “Save” button. From there, you can choose a category in which to save your item, such as Food & Drink or Things to Do.
Not an L.A. Times subscriber? Don’t worry. You can register for a free account to get saving on many of our guides. Once you’ve saved a few items, check out your personalized save dashboard at latimes.com/saved/guides. You can also find it in the site account dropdown menu.
Call it a wish list, bucket list or checklist — the dashboard is all yours. Revisit your saves, remove ones you don’t want and even see your items on a personal map.
We hope this makes it easier to explore L.A. and beyond.
Lifestyle
What makes a song a ‘millennial song’ : It’s Been a Minute
What is the defining ‘millennial’ anthem?
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Mat Hayward/Scott Gries/Randall Michelson/Prince Williams/Getty Images
What song best defines the millennial generation?
On this episode from our friends at All Songs Considered, NPR Music editors Hazel Cills and Sheldon Pearce join host Robin Hilton to weigh the options and attempt to pick the one song that best captures the Millennial experience, from the dizzying highs of the dot-com boom, when anything seemed possible, to the post-9-11 bust, the “hope and change” of the Obama years, and prolonged period of generational disillusionment.
Want more on the culture of pop music?
The D-List pop star purgatory
Bad Bunny redefined what “America” means
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Additional support for this episode came from Corey Antonio Rose. It was edited by Neena Pathak. Our Executive Producer is Barton Girdwood. Our VP of Programming is Yolanda Sangweni.
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