Connect with us

Lifestyle

A Relationship That Moved Like a Rolling Stone

Published

on

A Relationship That Moved Like a Rolling Stone

In Could 2022, Kevin Patrick Gleeson upended his life. He was within the strategy of dissolving his marriage together with his second spouse, had retired, left Woodside, Queens, the place he had lived for almost all of his life, and relocated to Macon, Ga. He had no concept that love would uproot him as soon as extra a couple of months later.

“I hit each single museum, each mountaineering path and each Native American burial floor,” Mr. Gleeson stated. “I walked plenty of trails, praying for somebody identical to Lisa.”

Whereas Mr. Gleeson, 63, had by no means tried on-line courting, by September he logged onto SilverSingles, a courting web site for individuals over 50, and was instantly drawn to the profile of Lisa Anne Felix Smartt. It was a photograph of her hugging a pillow that caught his eye. She “simply seemed so cute,” he stated.

Ms. Smartt was practically 250 miles away, in Asheville, N.C., after they began corresponding, however inside every week, her grownup daughter who lived in Berkeley, Calif., contracted Covid and was struggling acute signs. This, together with the truth that her mom, ceramics artist Susan Duhan Felix, had been in poor health and was in palliative care, introduced Ms. Smartt again to town from which she hailed.

Ms. Smartt’s 28-year-old daughter now has lengthy Covid and has been recognized with myalgic encephalomyelitis/power fatigue syndrome, which causes her to expertise signs like excessive exhaustion and impaired mobility. Ms. Smartt grew to become the full-time caregiver to her daughter, who’s now bedridden, squeezing in visits to her mom when she might.

Advertisement

It was not precisely the optimum time for a brand new relationship, as Ms. Smartt was “exhausted and depressed,” she stated, “and at occasions paralyzed in grief on the situation of the 2 ladies I liked most.”

Her correspondence with Mr. Gleeson grew to become a beautiful distraction. After they broached the subject of spirituality, Mr. Gleeson wrote, “My life is a dwelling prayer.”

“Holy smokes,” Ms. Smartt, additionally 63, thought to herself, utilizing a saltier phrase than “smokes.” “I’m completed.”

Mr. Gleeson, who has been in restoration from medicine and alcohol for practically 38 years, stated that whereas he was raised Catholic, he doesn’t ascribe to anyone perception system. Fairly, he lives his life “as an motion of gratitude.”

“As a part of my restoration, I’ve sat with inmates in jail and with individuals in psychiatric hospitals,” he stated. “I don’t do formal prayers, however I reside a lifetime of gratitude and repair.”

Advertisement

The son of two Irish immigrants, Mr. Gleeson labored for the New York Police Division as an administrative graphic artist for nearly 18 years, the place he designed their graphics.

He additionally performs guitar in quite a lot of Rolling Stones tribute bands, taking part in the a part of Keith Richards. With the band Sticky Fingers, he has toured Europe and different nations quite a few occasions. Divorced twice, he has two grownup sons and not too long ago grew to become a grandfather.

Ms. Smartt’s Jewish mother and father had been New York transplants to Northern California, and born in the identical Queens hospital as Mr. Gleeson. She graduated from the College of California, Berkeley after which earned a grasp’s diploma in instructional psychology from San Francisco State College.

As somebody who survived childhood trauma and skilled dependancy, Ms. Smartt developed an curiosity in near-death experiences; she is the writer of “Phrases on the Threshold”; “Cante Bardo: A Tune Between Lives”; and “Veil: Poems from Throughout the Threshold.”

“We began corresponding on a profound, mental stage about our previous, current and future, and our ideas, beliefs and fears,” Ms. Smartt stated.

Advertisement

Additionally they shared about their earlier marriages. Ms. Smartt had her grownup daughter together with her first husband; she and her second husband divorced in January 2020.

Ms. Smartt and Mr. Gleeson’s e mail correspondence quickly totaled greater than 100 pages.

“Kevin has a lot soul, and stored telling me that he didn’t see himself as brilliant, as he didn’t have as a lot training as me,” Ms. Smartt stated. “However he was writing me this unimaginable poetry and was so considerate.”

On the evening of their first Zoom name, Mr. Gleeson serenaded Ms. Smartt with the Rolling Stones’ “Wild Horses” and Sheryl Crow’s “If It Makes You Comfortable.”

A brand new piano pupil, Ms. Smartt instructed him she had been writing a music, they usually started engaged on it collectively.

Advertisement

Quickly, Mr. Gleeson learn “Cante Bardo,” Ms. Smartt’s e-book a few flamenco singer.

“I fell in love with it,” he stated. “Lisa’s writing actually spoke to me.”

(Apparently, Ms. Smartt’s mom fell in love together with her father, poet Morton Felix, by studying his poetry; she was afraid of assembly him in particular person as she feared it’d spoil it. They had been married for 54 years earlier than he died.)

They started having nightly Zoom dates, 7 p.m. pacific time, 10 p.m. jap, so he might play a music for her on the finish of her lengthy days of caregiving.

When she instructed her mom she was falling in love, and launched Mr. Gleeson to Ms. Felix on Zoom, Ms. Smartt’s mom stated, “You possibly can’t know if he’s the one till you kiss him.”

Advertisement

Mr. Gleeson booked a flight and a rental with a view of the San Francisco Bay, with separate bedrooms for them in order to not presume. Ms. Smartt requested considered one of her daughter’s pals to step in to take care of her daughter in her absence.

On Oct. 23, a few month after they first related, Mr. Gleeson flew to the Bay Space. He quarantined for a number of days upstairs in Ms. Felix’s residence, after which obtained a Covid take a look at earlier than assembly Ms. Felix unmasked. When he did, he and Ms. Smartt kissed in entrance of her.

Mr. Gleeson performed a number of Bob Dylan songs for Ms. Felix, at her request, that he had been training, only for her.

Ms. Felix was not shy about asking Mr. Gleeson about his intentions. She preferred that he had each a strong pension and was an artist and musician. When he instructed her he was additionally useful round the home, that was all Ms. Felix wanted.

“You need to marry this man,” Ms. Felix instructed her daughter. When Mr. Gleeson then dropped to 1 knee at Ms. Felix’s bedside and proposed, Ms. Smartt stated, “I’ll gladly get engaged after which let’s give it a while to get to know one another higher.”

Advertisement

“A while” turned out to be solely three months.

Whereas Mr. Gleeson agreed Ms. Smartt’s life was difficult, he was used to being the caregiver, he stated.

Irrespective of how a lot work he had completed on himself, Mr. Gleeson stated there was part of him that felt caught because the particular person he was earlier than he obtained sober.

“Lisa obtained me to be the person I used to be presupposed to be,” he stated. “I haven’t felt this good about myself or in my pores and skin in over 40 years. She’s magic to me.”

“Kevin is magical, soulful, trustworthy, caring, a survivor, and has a coronary heart of gold,” Ms. Smartt stated. “We’ve discovered that secure area to share brazenly and to heal.”

Advertisement

Quickly, Mr. Gleeson moved them each out of the Southeast, and drove west in his van, towing Ms. Smartt’s automobile behind him. They discovered a home to lease collectively in Sonoma.

Whereas at first, the couple deliberate a bigger wedding ceremony in Ms. Felix’s yard, the Covid surge anticipated after the vacations fearful them. The date stayed the identical however the wedding ceremony was scaled again to solely 5 company, plus Ms. Felix’s two caregivers.

The couple had been married Jan. 21 by Elizheva Hurvich, an in depth buddy of Ms. Felix’s who’s a Common Life Church minister and rabbinical pupil, in Ms. Felix’s lounge, which had turn into her bed room; she lay in mattress subsequent to the white tulle huppah adorned with lavender material roses; Ms. Felix additionally wore a Frida Kahlo-like crown of the identical roses.

Six musicians from Saul Goodman’s Klezmer Band built-in the Rolling Stones’ “Wild Horses” right into a klezmer tune because the bride and groom processed down the staircase.

Mr. Gleeson performed a music he wrote for Ms. Smartt, referred to as “One,” beneath the huppah.

Advertisement

Ms. Hurvich directed the couple to the entrance stoop of the home to interrupt the glass.

After the ceremony, the group walked a couple of blocks, turning on College Avenue, the place they danced a spontaneous hora on the sidewalk, whereas automobiles driving by honked their horns.

After they reached the Montecristo Taqueria, everybody ordered off the menu and shared a tres leches cake.

There, Mr. Gleeson introduced he was taking Ms. Smartt’s identify, he stated, “to flip misogyny.”


When Jan. 21, 2023

Advertisement

The place The bride’s mom’s lounge in Berkeley, Calif.

Happiness and Hardship “Whereas we’re right here to witness pleasure, we acknowledge that our lives are difficult,” Ms. Hurvich, the officiant, stated, including, “Who would guess that Lisa would discover love, and never simply any love however this love? Within the midst of such hardship, it’s testimony to the miraculous.”

What They Wore The bride wore a white costume her mom wore at her personal fiftieth anniversary celebration. The groom wore a black swimsuit, and after they left the home, he donned a purple prime hat.

A Mom’s Blessing The bride’s mom, Susan Duhan Felix, died Feb. 4, precisely two weeks after the marriage. She was 85.

Advertisement
Continue Reading
Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Lifestyle

'Kidnapped' tells the historical horror story of an abducted Jewish child

Published

on

'Kidnapped' tells the historical horror story of an abducted Jewish child

Enea Sala (center) plays the young Edgardo in Kidnapped: The Abduction of Edgardo Mortara.

Anna Camerlingo/Cohen Media Group


hide caption

toggle caption

Advertisement

Anna Camerlingo/Cohen Media Group

We’re living through days of powerful, often violent religious feeling — stories that might have felt like old dead history now take on a stinging new relevance.

That’s the case with Kidnapped: The Abduction of Edgardo Mortara, the ferocious true story of a young Jewish boy forcibly taken from his parents by emissaries of the Pope in 1858. It was made by Marco Bellocchio, the great Italian filmmaker who first burst on the scene 59 years ago with his scorched-earth debut Fists in the Pocket.

Now 84 but still far from mellow, Bellocchio takes us back to the 19th century to tell a historical horror story steeped in Roman Catholic antisemitism.

Advertisement

The action begins in 1850s Bologna, which was then under the rule of the unpopular and highly conservative Pope Pius IX. The just-born Edgardo is the sixth son of a Jewish Bolognese family, whose housemaid, unbeknownst to them, baptizes the baby to save his soul.

When the Church’s inquisitor in Bolgona learns of this baptism six years later, he declares Edgardo a Christian. And because it’s illegal for non-Christians to raise a Christian child, he grabs the 6-year-old boy away from his agonized parents and ships him to Rome. There, as he yearns for his mother, Edgardo’s put into a boarding school for the children of converted Jews, where he’s surrounded by images of the crucifixion.

Naturally Edgardo’s parents are shattered and do everything they can to get him back — even waging a huge international PR campaign. Going to Rome, they make heartrending appeals to stony-faced priests who say they understand their sadness but can do nothing to alleviate it. After all, they are helping the boy become a proper Christian.

To avoid seeming politically weak, Pius IX refuses the world’s calls for Edgardo’s freedom. In fact, he doubles down on the kidnapping, personally guiding the boy’s Catholic education and having him baptized a second time.

Although Kidnapped is a straightforward historical drama about religious oppression, Edgardo’s tale is filled with startling twists and turns, especially when, in 1860, nationalist rioters overthrow Pius IX’s rule in Bologna. With new people in charge, the Bologna inquisitor is arrested for the kidnapping and we see how Edgardo has fallen through one of the trap doors of history. Had he simply been born a few years later, he wouldn’t have been taken from his Jewish home and forcibly made a Christian.

Advertisement

Even as the rebels go after the pope, we keep worrying about Edgardo’s fate in Rome. What happens to a young Jewish boy who’s cut off from his family and trained not just to be a good Catholic but to become a priest? What core of the original Edgardo remains? Who does he become as he moves into manhood? The answers are unsettling.

Now, at moments Kidnapped feels old-fashioned. Yet Bellocchio never falls into boring costume drama realism. Working in a painterly style, he pushes things toward the operatic — laying on surging music and endowing Edgardo with innocent good looks that border on the angelic. Actor Paolo Pierobon plays Pope Pius as a kind of opera buffa figure, hammy in a Marlon Brando sort of way — at once silly and creepy and sinister. In one of the film’s best scenes, Edgardo has a hallucinatory encounter with a crucifix that directly answers the falsehood that the Jews killed Christ.

Like me, Bellocchio was raised a Roman Catholic and is clearly appalled by the Church’s cruelty to the Mortara family and to all Jews, whom they treated as inferiors who must literally kiss the pope’s feet for decent treatment. He wants us to be appalled and angry, too.

Yet what gives the movie its timely resonance is not merely its depiction of antisemitism but what it shows about the dangerous politics of religious belief. Although religion officially deals in timeless universal truths, Kidnapped reminds us that these timeless universals are always bound up with historical questions of power. And where there’s power, there will be abuse.

Advertisement
Continue Reading

Lifestyle

Biggie's Mom Says She Wants to Slap Diddy After Watching Cassie Video

Published

on

Biggie's Mom Says She Wants to Slap Diddy After Watching Cassie Video

Advertisement

Continue Reading

Lifestyle

'Star Trek: Discovery' ends as an underappreciated TV pioneer

Published

on

'Star Trek: Discovery' ends as an underappreciated TV pioneer

Sonequa Martin-Green as Michael Burnham.

Michael Gibson/Paramount+


hide caption

toggle caption

Advertisement

Michael Gibson/Paramount+

First, an admission: Though this column will offer a lot of discussion and defense of Star Trek: Discovery as a pivotal show, it won’t spend much time talking up the series’ current, final season or its finale episode, “Life, Itself,” dropping Thursday on Paramount+.

That’s because, for this critic, the last few seasons of Discovery have been a bit bogged down by the stuff that has always made it a tough sell as a Trek series: overly ambitious, serialized storylines that aren’t compelling; new characters and environments that don’t impress; plot twists which can be maddening in their lack of logic; big storytelling swings which can be confusing and predictable at once.

The show’s finale features the culmination of a sprawling scavenger hunt which found the crew of the starship Discovery bounding all over the place, searching for clues leading to a powerful technology pioneered by an alien race which created humanoid life throughout the galaxy. Their goal was to grab the technology before another race, ruthless and aggressive, could beat them to it, laying waste to everything.

Advertisement

It’s no spoiler to reveal that Discovery’s heroes avoid that nightmarish scenario, wrapping its fifth and final season with a conclusion centered on Sonequa Martin-Green’s ever-resourceful Capt. Michael Burnham and fond resolutions for a multitude of supporting characters (there’s even a space wedding!)

Still, this good-enough ending belies Discovery’s status as a pioneering show which helped Paramount+ build a new vision for Star Trek in modern television – breaking ground that more creatively successful series like Star Trek: Picard and Star Trek: Strange New Worlds would follow years later.

And it all began with a singular character: Michael Burnham.

A take on Star Trek for modern TV

Discovery debuted in 2017 on CBS All Access — the streaming service which would become Paramount+ — facing a serious challenge.

As the first new Trek series in a dozen years, it had to chart a path which offered a new vision of the franchise without going too far — carving out a new corner in the universe of Capt. Kirk and Mr. Spock not long after the release of Star Trek Beyond, the third feature film produced by J. J. Abrams featuring rebooted versions of those classic characters.

Advertisement

Producers set Discovery’s story 10 years before the days of Kirk and Spock (originally depicted on NBC for three seasons starting way back in 1966). The new series wouldn’t be centered on a starship captain, but its second in command: Burnham, a Black woman who also happened to be the hitherto unknown adopted daughter of Vulcan ambassador Sarek, Spock’s father (she would get promoted to captain of Discovery much later).

A Black human woman who was raised among the emotionally controlling, super-intellectual Vulcans? Who Trek fans had never heard of over nearly 60 years? Before I actually saw any episodes, my own feelings ranged from cautiously intrigued to cynically pessimistic.

But then I saw the first episode, which had an amazing early scene: Martin-Green as Burnham and Michelle Yeoh as Discovery Capt. Philippa Georgiou walking across an alien planet – two women of color marking the first step forward for Star Trek on a new platform.

People once sidelined in typical science fiction stories were now centerstage — a thrilling, historic moment.

Michelle Yeoh as Captain Philippa Georgiou and Sonequa Martin-Green as First Officer Michael Burnham in the very first episode of Star Trek: Discovery.

Michelle Yeoh as Captain Philippa Georgiou and Sonequa Martin-Green as First Officer Michael Burnham in the very first episode of Star Trek: Discovery.

Jan Thijs/CBS

Advertisement


hide caption

toggle caption

Jan Thijs/CBS

Advertisement

And it got better from there. Back in the day, Trek writers often felt hamstrung by creator Gene Roddenberry’s insistence that, in the future depicted by the show, humans were beyond social ills like greed, prejudice, sexism, war, money and personal friction. The writers chafed, wondering: How in the world do you build compelling stories on a starship where interpersonal human conflict doesn’t exist?

But Discovery found a workaround, putting Burnham in a position where logic led her to mutiny against her captain, attempting a strategy which ultimately failed — leaving humans in open combat with the legendarily warlike Klingons. Discovery also featured a long storyline which played out over an entire season, unlike many earlier Trek shows which tried to offer a new adventure every week.

The show’s first season had plenty of action, with Harry Potter alum Jason Isaacs emerging as a compelling and unique starship captain (saying more would be a spoiler; log onto Paramount+ and check out the first season). Fans saw a new vision for Trek technology, leveraging sleek, visceral special effects and action sequences worthy of a big budget movie, with design elements cribbed from several of the franchise’s films.

Later in its run, Discovery would debut Ethan Peck as Spock and Anson Mount as Christopher Pike, classic Trek characters who eventually got their own acclaimed series in Strange New Worlds. So far, five other Trek series have emerged on Paramount+ from ideas initially incubated on Discovery – including a critically acclaimed season of Picard which reunited the cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Not bad for a series one TV critic eventually called among “the worst in the [Trek] franchise’s history.”

Advertisement

Discovery’s unappreciated legacy

Unfortunately, Discovery has taken some turns which didn’t work out quite so well. At the end of Discovery’s second season, the starship jumped ahead in time nine centuries – perhaps to remove it from Strange New World’s timeline? – placing it in an environment only distantly connected to classic Trek.

And while Discovery initially seemed cautious about referencing classic Trek in its stories, later series like Strange New Worlds and Picard learned the value of diving into the near-60-year-old franchise’s legacy – regularly tapping the show’s longtime appeal, rather than twisting into knots to avoid it.

Advertisement

There are likely fans of Discovery who would disagree with this analysis. But I think it helps explain why the series has never quite gotten its due in the world of Star Trek, initially shaded by skeptical fans and later overshadowed by more beloved products.

Now is the perfect time to pay tribute to a show which actually accomplished quite a lot – helping prove that Roddenberry’s brainchild still has a lot of narrative juice left in the 21st Century.

Continue Reading

Trending