To paraphrase the late, great Casey Stengel, can’t anybody in the Big Ten play this game?

We know Ohio State can. And Oregon. And Penn State. But after that?

USC? Nope. Michigan? Nope. We thought Rutgers might be able to. But nope. That leaves Indiana (maybe?) and possibly Nebraska. But only possibly. It was a rough week for the pretenders.

As for contenders, the Buckeyes and Ducks duke it out this week in Eugene. Pass the popcorn. 

1. Ohio State (5-0)

Last week: 1

This week: at Oregon

What to know: After watching what happened last week at Upset Central, the Buckeyes should be glad they’re playing a top dog instead of a feisty underdog. 

2. Penn State (5-0)

Last week: 2

This week: at USC

What to know: Is it just us or are the Nittany Lions flying under the national radar? Regardless, they’re about to knock USC completely off the national map.

3. Oregon (5-0)

Last week: 3. 

This week: vs. Ohio State

What to know: We know Oregonians excel at hugging trees, but can they wrap their arms around Buckeyes tailbacks and receivers often enough to at least save the day, if not the planet?.     

4. Indiana (6-0)

Last week: 8

This week: idle

What to know: The Hoosiers need the week off to recover from pinching themselves. They can’t believe they join Miami as the only two 6-0 teams in Power 4.

5. Illinois (4-1)

Last week: 9

This week: vs. Purdue

What to know: The Illini have found the secret sauce to spicing up their offense. It’s called Purdue

6. Nebraska (5-1)

Last week: 10

This week: idle

What to know: The Cornhuskers get a week off to prepare for that Big Ten juggernaut: Indiana. .   

7. Rutgers (4-1)

Last week: 6

This week: vs. Wisconsin

What to know: Another week, another test for the Scarlet Knights, who failed the grade against Nebraska last week. They’ll need a cheat code for the Badgers.

8. Iowa (3-2)

Last week: 7

This week: vs. Washington

What to know: Iowa tailback Kaleb Johnson still ranks No. 2 nationally in rushing yards (771) but Ohio State held him to 86 yards. Luckily for the Hawkeyes, UDub is not OSU.

9. Washington (4-2)

Last week: 12

This week: at Iowa

What to know: The Huskies have not visited Iowa City since the Beatles first invaded America. Coincidentally, they’ll need “Help!” beating the Hawkeyes. 

10. Michigan (4-2)

Last week: 5

This week: idle

What to know: When you throw the ball like Christian Dior – the Wolverines rank fifth from the bottom in FCS in passing yards per game (115) – you need to run the ball like Christian McCaffrey. And UM doesn’t.

11. Minnesota (3-3)

Last week: 14

This week: at UCLA

What to know: After having just knocked off L.A.’s other college team, the Golden Gophers go for the Hollywood sweep.

12. USC (3-2)

Last week: 4. 

This week: vs. Penn State

What to know: A few years ago, reports had PSU coach James Franklin eying the Trojans’ job. Maybe Troy should have eyed him back?

13. Wisconsin (3-2)

Last week: 13

This week: at Rutgers

What to know: Fun-loving Cheeseheads fans get to party in the shadow of the Big Apple. The Badgers, meanwhile, get the Sopranos treatment in New Jersey.  

14. Michigan State (3-3)

Last week: 11

This week: idle

What to know: Sparty is that team that looks so close to being good but really is so far from it. 

15. Maryland (3-2)

Last week: 15

This week: vs. Northwestern (Friday)

What to know: The Terrapins need to get their heads out of their, er, shells, if they expect to become bowl eligible. 

16. Northwestern (2-3)

Last week: 16 

This week: at Maryland (Friday)

What to know: It’s been a tough go for Chicago teams, but chin up, Wildcats, you can’t be as awful as the White Sox..

17. UCLA (1-4)

Last week: 17

This week: vs. Minnesota

What to know: When the Bruins sit down for dinner, they give thanks they’re not Purdue.

18. Purdue (1-4)

Last week: 18

This week: at Illinois

What to know: Mama taught us if you don’t have anything nice to say … so we’re keeping our mouth shut on this one.

roller@dispatch.com

@rollerCD

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