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Advice | Carolyn Hax: Last therapist said cold-calling her office was ‘weird.’ Now what?

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2 years ago

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Advice | Carolyn Hax: Last therapist said cold-calling her office was ‘weird.’ Now what?


Adapted from an online discussion.

Dear Carolyn: I’m working up my nerve to seek therapy. Your “What is therapy like?” column really helped. I would like a reality check on one thing.

I’m lucky enough to have insurance. The last time I sought therapy, I did what my friends suggested and called a therapist who was near me and on my insurance plan, and I asked her if she was taking new patients.

She said she was open to new patients, but — did I know someone who was a client of hers? Because if I didn’t, if I was just calling her out of the blue, well, “that’s kind of weird.”

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I did end up having a few sessions with her. Long story long, it was not good. I ended up feeling a lot worse and found it impossible to start trying to find someone else to talk to.

Was that a weird way to find a therapist? Should I be going about this a different way? The only person I know who’s local to me and in therapy is my 24-year-old. Their therapist is absolutely wonderful — my spouse and I helped our kiddo find her when kiddo was a teenager — but I’m hesitant to see her because I’m worried about boundaries. Plus, I think she’s not on our plan anymore and money is definitely an issue.

50-something Female: 1. The weirdest thing about the first therapist was her uncalled-for comment. Not okay at all.

2. It is okay to rule out a therapist for saying something to make you uncomfortable like that. Live and learn. Either speak up about it first — “Making this call was difficult for me, and saying I did something ‘weird’ is not helpful” — or just decline to make an appointment and restart your search. Fit really matters.

3. It can be helpful to get a therapist recommendation from someone you trust — friend, doctor, school counselor, clergy — but, no, looking up someone through your insurance is not “weird.” The baseline thing to expect from a provider is a supportive welcome to their practice. Yeesh. And finding someone is hard!

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4. I doubt your child’s wonderful therapist would even agree to treat you, given the potential conflict of interest. But you can ask her for names of other therapists she respects. Then see if any are in your plan, and voilà.

But still say “no thanks” if one of those recommended therapists says something to put you off. Finding that good fit — therapist, friends, career, neighborhood, partner, pants — is rarely a quick process and rarely not worth the effort.

· I’m a therapist, and I get at least a dozen such calls and emails every week. They’re not weird or unusual; people are directed my way by their insurance company listings, by web searches (notably the Psychology Today website) or by taking notice of the little sign with my name on it outside my office door.

The fact is, the ranks of therapists include a percentage of less-than-capable individuals, same as auto mechanics, financial advisers, lawyers or [insert your favorite example here]. If you feel a need to talk with someone, stick with it until you find someone with whom you’re comfortable.

· The therapist who called cold-calling weird is … weird.

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Social media reacts to former BYU star AJ Dybantsa going No. 1 in 2026 NBA draft

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7 hours ago

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June 23, 2026

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Social media reacts to former BYU star AJ Dybantsa going No. 1 in 2026 NBA draft


Former BYU basketball star AJ Dybantsa fulfilled his dream of going No. 1 overall in the 2026 NBA draft.

The Washington Wizards selected Dybantsa with the first pick.

Immediately after the pick, reactions poured in on social media about the Wizards drafting Dybantsa.

Social media reactions to the Washington Wizards selecting BYU star AJ Dybantsa

Mitch Harper is a BYU Insider for KSL and hosts the Cougar Tracks Podcast daily on KSL Sports YouTube and KSL NewsRadio (SUBSCRIBE). Harper also co-hosts Cougar Sports Saturday (12–3 p.m.) on KSL NewsRadio.

Follow Mitch’s coverage of BYU athletics in the Big 12 Conference on X (formerly Twitter) and Instagram: @Mitch_Harper.

Want more coverage of BYU sports? Take us with you wherever you go.

Download the new and improved KSL Sports app from Utah’s sports leader. Allows you to stream live radio and video, keeping you up to date on all your favorite teams.

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Washington Commanders announce 2026 training camp schedule

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17 hours ago

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June 23, 2026

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Washington Commanders announce 2026 training camp schedule


ASHBURN, Va. – The Washington Commanders have released their 2026 Training Camp schedule, with eleven open practices between August 1 and August 19, including five open to all fans and six reserved for season ticket members.

For the fifth straight year, training camp will take place at the team’s football operations headquarters in Ashburn, Virginia. 

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Open practices for all fans are scheduled for August 1, August 7, August 8, August 18 and August 19.

 Season ticket member practices will be held August 3, 4, 5, 10, 11 and 12. 

All sessions begin at 8:30 a.m., with gates opening at 7:30 a.m.

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Fans can claim free tickets beginning June 23 at 10 a.m. General admission fans may request up to six tickets and one parking pass for a single day of camp. Season ticket members can claim tickets for two member‑exclusive days in addition to one general admission day. All parking will be on site at the BigBear.ai Performance Center and requires a parking pass.

The team plans several themed events throughout camp, including Back Together Weekend on August 1, Military Appreciation Day on August 7 and Kids Day on August 8. Local youth football and community groups will also be hosted throughout the summer.

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For more information visit the Washington Commanders online.

The Source: Information in this article comes from the Washington Commanders.

SportsWashington CommandersWashington, D.C.
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Algae-filled Washington pool to be drained for repairs after US$14.7 million renovation

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1 day ago

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June 23, 2026

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Algae-filled Washington pool to be drained for repairs after US.7 million renovation


The Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool on Washington’s National Mall is set to be drained again for repairs after algae and peeling paint appeared just weeks after a US$14.7 million renovation, while President Donald Trump threatened prison time for anyone caught ‌damaging the pool.

The DC Water authority issued a permit to drain the 609-metre rectangular pool, it said on Monday, while the repair company said it would fix the pool as part of its warranty.

Peeling paint and algae growth have been visible in the pool since soon after Trump declared the renovation project complete on June 6. Critics have raised concerns about the no-bid contract to recoat the pool before the ⁠nation’s 250th anniversary celebrations next month, as well as for the ducks that use its water. Workers from the National Park Service earlier this ‌week poured hydrogen peroxide into the pool to combat the algae.

Trump, without evidence, has blamed vandals for the state of the landmark. On Monday, he echoed a weekend threat ‌by US Attorney Jeanine Pirro to prosecute people accused of attempting to destroy the pool.

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“Please remember that there is ⁠a 10-year prison sentence for the ⁠destruction, or even the attempted destruction, of such things – Which will be fully enforced!” Trump earlier wrote in a social media post. Destruction of federal property can ‌carry a maximum prison sentence of 10 years.

It was not immediately apparent what criminal or civil violation someone might commit reaching into the pool.



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