Hey. It’s lastly summer time! It’s truly enjoyable to go exterior now. So many cool actions are on the desk. Actually most of you don’t need to spend these treasured months worrying about soccer video games which can be three months away. Sadly for these of us sun-fearing ghouls that have a look at the surface world the best way that cats have a look at cucumbers, the nervousness in regards to the soccer season has already crept in. For my fellow dweebs or anyone determined for summertime soccer content material, I’m going to be doing a weekly dive into every of Iowa’s 2022 opponents, attending to know them somewhat bit higher, articulating why we must be frightened about them, and conjuring up situations through which Iowa can *possibly* eke out a win.

First up is Iowa’s week one opponent, the Jackrabbits of South Dakota State. In the event you noticed this sport on Iowa’s schedule and thought, “FCS staff. Candy. Needs to be a simple W,” I forgive you. I assumed the identical factor. However if you happen to look below the hood of this 1992 Honda Civic, you will note the engine of an F1 automobile. Let’s begin with their head coach. The Jackrabbits have one of many solely head coaches in all of faculty soccer, John Stiegelmeier, that has manned his put up for longer than Kirk Ferentz, having taken over as the pinnacle coach for the Jackrabbits in 1997.

Whereas it took him over a decade, Steigelmeier turned South Dakota State into an FCS powerhouse. The Jackrabbits first made the playoffs in 2009 and once more in 2012, and have made the playoffs actually yearly since. That is the longest energetic playoff streak you will see that south of Fargo, North Dakota. Even if you happen to take discover of the truth that the Jackrabbits are changing an offensive coordinator and a co-defensive coordinator, it is best to in all probability preserve your Grinch-sized grin in regards to the turnover in examine, as a result of the fingers on the wheel are too regular to hope for an off yr.

So possibly you might be pondering to your self, “Yeah yeah. They make the 2A playoffs or no matter you name it. So flippin’ what? How do they do in opposition to the massive canines?” That’s a good query, hypothetical reader that I simply made up. Their total report is a not-eye-popping 2-9. A type of wins was a not significantly noteworthy high-scoring 41-38 nail-biter in opposition to Large 12 bottom-feeder Kansas in 2015. The opposite win was a very-decisive 42-23 victory over Colorado State in 2021. (Enjoyable apart, the Golden Gophers wanted a late TD and 2-point conversion to beat SDSU throughout their magical 2019 season.)

About that final one? A few of you absolutely do not forget that Colorado State is a staff that our beloved Hawkeyes additionally performed in 2021. In case your mind has blotted out the main points of that sport, let me remind you: Iowa received 24-14 however that rating belies how truly shut the sport was. We will ignore the gritty particulars, however let us take a look at the yardage totals for each of those two video games:

Iowa – 278 yards     Colorado State – 250 yards
SDSU – 466 yards   Colorado State – 462 yards

It is no shock that Iowa’s protection is magnificent and Iowa’s offense is putrescent, however the actual eye bleach is the working whole comparability: SDSU ran the ball 34 instances for 242 yards, a blistering 7.1 yards a carry. Iowa carried the ball 32 instances for a miniscule 54 yards, inverting SDSU’s ypc at 1.7 yards a carry. So, yeah, Iowa’s working sport was in all probability low-tier Missouri Valley final yr. (In case you are curious, the passing numbers are comparable, save Petras’ ghastly interception.)

I deliver these stats up to not take you down a peg or two, however largely to segue into what SDSU did very well final yr, particularly working the ball and stopping the run. They ranked 2nd within the Missouri Valley Convention at 5.8 yards/keep on 553 rushes. Defensively they held groups to three.3 yards/carry and just below 110 yards/sport. As a passing offense they have been a stable fifth with 228.9 yards/sport within the Missouri Valley, which was greater than sufficient to truly complement the working sport and set the Jackrabbits up with the pound-for-pound finest offense within the convention in 2021. If the Jackrabbits do something “poorly,” it was a go protection that ranked eighth within the Missouri Valley, however you probably have confidence that our Hawkeyes can shred even a mid-tier Missouri Valley Convention go protection, I’d like to get excessive on no matter is in your provide.

Astute readers will in all probability pay attention to the truth that Pierre Robust Jr., SDSU’s stud working again that dominated the Missouri Valley in each single dashing class, is now using Invoice Belicheck’s working again carousel in Foxboro. Perhaps you’re taking solace in the truth that SDSU’s quarterback, Chris Oladokun, is at the moment grinding it out in Pittsburgh to change into the following backup quarterback for the Steelers. And hey, if Iowa does something persistently properly, it’s shutting down competent working video games, even bizarre unfold working video games, so the Hawkeyes ought to be capable of include the Jackrabbits offense, proper? Properly, we’ve not but talked about Jackrabbit quarterback Mark Gronowski.

Gronowski began for the Jackrabbits as a real freshman within the 2020-2021 season, which in actuality was the spring season the Missouri Valley elected to have in 2021 when the autumn 2020 season was cancelled. Gronowski was fairly good passing the ball, going 108/188 for 1565 yards (8.3 yards an try), throwing 15 touchdowns, and three interceptions. (For shits and giggles, Petras was 165/288 for 1880 yards, 10 touchdowns, and 9 interceptions; roughly 6.5 yards an try.) However if you happen to have been hoping that Gronowski was doing a Statue of Liberty impersonation again there, assume once more sucker. He additionally had 83 rushes for 577 yards and 7 touchdowns. And oh hiya, he even caught a 24-yard-touchdown go. 

Gronowski was an enormous a part of the Jackrabbits making the FCS championship sport in spring 2021. Then, he busted his knee on the primary drive of the title sport in opposition to Sam Houston State, which was an enormous a part of why the Jackrabbits misplaced that sport. It additionally meant that he could not play within the fall 2021 season. All indication is that Mark’s hitting all of the, ahem, marks, wanted to be able to go on September third to start out the following chapter of his legacy, which presumably begins with main the Jackrabbits to considered one of their finest victories ever.

As for who Gronowski is throwing the ball to, let me introduce you to Tucker Kraft and the Double Double Js. Tucker Kraft is the Jackrabbit’s tight finish and was thirteenth amongst all passcatchers within the Missouri Valley in averaging 51.5 receiving yards per sport, ending the season with 65 catches for 773 yards and 6 TDs. (LaPorta was sixteenth by way of ypg within the Large Ten.) Who’re the Double Double Js? They’re Jaxon and Jadon Janke, SDSU’s senior twin vast receivers. Jaxon averaged 78.4 yards a carry, good for third in MVC, totalling 1176 yards on 72 catches with 5 TDs. Jadon averaged a “mere” 43.7 yards per sport, from 41 catches for 655 yards and 9 TDs.

In case you are holding rating at dwelling, here is what SDSU brings to the desk: stable teaching, a protection greater than able to snuffing out Iowa’s dashing assault, a superb dual-threat quarterback who not often turns the ball over, a deep receiving corps, and has a proficient squad that had no bother dominating a staff that gave Iowa matches final yr. Additionally they have a large “let’s go get this system’s finest ever win” chip on their shoulder. It isn’t onerous to think about a really disgusting 17-13 lead for Iowa deep into the 4th quarter. It takes solely barely extra creativeness to see Gronowski getting flushed out of the pocket earlier than discovering considered one of his receivers working free down the sideline for a devastating landing, adopted by one closing flaccid Iowa drive for zero factors.

So what must occur to keep away from this horrific future? Here’s a lame acronym that I simply made up: RES (Rush Successfully Silly). It’s a idiot’s hope to foretell some large stride from Iowa’s passing sport, no matter who’s chucking the soccer. There’s zero cause to assume that occurs. (Show me unsuitable, Brian. I dare you.) It’s a standard-issue hope to search for substantial enhancements within the working sport. We will pencil in anyplace between 13-23 factors for SDSU, however some modest enhancements by offensive line and ferocious working by Williams and Williams, C.B.A.s, ought to be sufficient to deliver Iowa’s working sport in direction of mediocrity, which must be greater than sufficient to put on down the Jackrabbits and a considerably comfy victory. RES Child, RES!!

Ben’s Anxiousness Scale: 3/10

The Hawkeye Homer Model of the Article: Hawks will dominate an overmatched FCS staff and switch them into Rabbit Stew! Hawks by one million!!