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We’ll Swap You Southern Illinois for St. Louis

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We’ll Swap You Southern Illinois for St. Louis


Hardin County lies alongside the Ohio River, 325 miles straight down Illinois Freeway 1 from Chicago. It’s the least populous county within the state, but in addition some of the historic and picturesque, for in Hardin County is Cave-in-Rock State Park, a distinct segment within the bluff overlooking the river. The 18th Century charlatan Samuel Mason put up an indication promoting Cave-in-Rock as a “Liquor Vault and Home of Leisure.” When thirsty, sexy flatboat crews stopped to be liquored and entertained, Mason robbed them. Cave-in-Rock remained a hideout for “scoundrels, thieves and counterfeiters” till they had been routed by Davy Crockett and Mike Fink. You’d know that when you noticed the Disney film Davy Crockett and the River Pirates, which was filmed in Cave-in-Rock.

Hardin County has made marvelous contributions to the folklore of Illinois, however it now not desires to be a part of this state. Final November, its 3,650 residents voted to “collaborate in discussions with the remaining 101 counties within the state of Illinois, excluding Prepare dinner County, concerning the potential for forming a brand new state and in the end looking for admission to the federal union, because the 51st state.” The non-binding decision handed by a 3-1 margin, making Hardin the twenty seventh county to vote to discover secession — nearly all of them in Southern Illinois.

Chicago and Southern Illinois have not often agreed on something. That goes again to the nineteenth Century, when Chicago voted for Lincoln and Southern Illinois for Douglas. Little Egypt was settled first, and its main lights had been so satisfied that the brand new settlement on Lake Michigan would by no means quantity to something that in 1825, the Financial institution of Shawneetown refused it a $10,000 mortgage. However, based on the guide The Different Illinois, by Baker Brownell, “Chicago beat out Saint Louis and Alton and New Orleans as the massive market and railroad middle. This deflected site visitors and enterprise and grabbed trade. Chicago shouldered us out of the sunshine. To hell with Chicago.”

At this time, Illinois’s authorities is dominated by Chicago-area Democrats who move legal guidelines that go towards the grain of rural Egyptians. Non secular fundamentalism has all the time been an necessary characteristic of life in Southern Illinois, however Carbondale is about to develop into the abortion vacation spot for the complete mid-South, as a result of these danged libruls from Chicago handed the Reproductive Well being Act.

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“Our state authorities skews a lot within the course of our largest city space that insurance policies are handed which might be good for Chicago, however not the remainder of the state,” mentioned G.H. Merritt, chair of the pro-secession group New Illinois. “When the state doubled the gasoline tax, for instance, that affected individuals outstate greater than individuals in city areas who take public transportation.”

Given these grievances, possibly it’s time to take the “Illinois” out of Southern Illinois. We are able to’t allow them to kind a 51st state, although, as a result of that new state would elect two conservative Republican senators, altering the stability of energy in Washington. Right here’s a greater thought: let’s commerce Southern Illinois to Missouri — for St. Louis. That will make people on either side of the Mississippi River happier. Southern Illinoisans would go from a Blue state the place it’s straightforward to get an abortion however onerous to get a gun, to a Crimson state the place it’s onerous to get an abortion however straightforward to get a gun. 

St. Louis, alternatively, is a Blue metropolis trapped in a Crimson state. In 2020, St. Louis gave 81 % of its vote to Joe Biden, just one level decrease than Chicago. After the Supreme Court docket overturned Roe v. Wade, rural Missouri legislators proposed making it against the law to cross the river to Illinois for an abortion. Politically, culturally, and even linguistically, St. Louis has extra in widespread with Chicago than it does with the remainder of its personal state, which it considers a benighted hillbilly backwater. As a result of the 2 cities are joined by Interstate 55, the normal St. Louis accent has been supplanted by a Chicago-influenced Nice Lakes accent. (Simply hearken to St. Louis native John Goodman play northern Illinois dad Dan Conner on The Conners.)

“St. Louis is the one metropolis outdoors the Nice Lakes that participates within the Northern Cities Vowel Shift,” says Randy Vines, who research the St. Louis language as proprietor of StL Type, a boutique that sells T-shirts with such native sayings as “Freeway Midland Farty” and “The place’d You Go to Excessive Faculty?”

Says Vines, “St. Louis has extra in widespread with the northern and jap cities than the remainder of Missouri. You go 35 miles out, and there’s a serious distinction.”

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Again in 2011, St. Louis Publish-Dispatch columnist Invoice McClellan (a Chicago native and Fenger Excessive Faculty graduate), proposed becoming a member of Illinois and renaming town West East St. Louis.

“Let’s break up and get on with our lives,” McClellan wrote. “Many people in West East St. Louis have seen sufficient of this legislative session to know we would like out. The legislators in Jefferson Metropolis need to repeal little one labor legal guidelines, carry the restrictions on pet mills, cast off the voter-approved price of dwelling will increase to the minimal wage and kill unions. Oh yeah, slap lecturers round, too…It’s actually only a matter of dividing the belongings. We’ll take city avenue crime. They will have the meth labs.”

We have already got loads of city avenue crime in Illinois, so a bit of extra gained’t damage us. And simply consider every part else we’d achieve within the commerce. Sure, we’d lose Cave-in-Rock, however we’d achieve Lacelde’s Touchdown. We’d lose the 198-foot-tall cross outdoors Effingham, however we’d achieve the 630-foot-tall Gateway Arch. We’d lose Shemwell’s Barbecue in Cairo, however we’d achieve Bogart’s Smokehouse in Soulard — a complete new model of barbecue for our state. We must take the Cardinals — however that may triple the variety of World Sequence gained by Illinois baseball groups.

On high of that, the Chicago space can cease supporting a backward area of the state that takes $2.88 in tax cash for each $1 it places in. And the nice conservative people of Southern Illinois can lastly discover out what it’s prefer to belong to a small-government state that skimps on funding for parks, universities, and public works. That’s what they’ve all the time wished, proper? 

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Campbell's reveals Illinois' favorite Thanksgiving side dish

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Campbell's reveals Illinois' favorite Thanksgiving side dish


There’s a new king of the mountain when it comes to side dishes at Thanksgiving, and Illinois’ pick is also the favorite of Americans.

This news comes via Campbell’s annual State of the Sides report, released each year ahead of the Thanksgiving holiday to reveal what side dishes Americans are pairing with their turkeys on the big day.

According to the report, stuffing/dressing overtook mashed potatoes as America’s favorite side dish, with sweet potatoes also moving up to the third spot in the ranking.

Green bean casserole checks in at No. 4, according to the ranking, with mac and cheese dropping from third to fifth this year.

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According to Campbell’s, Illinois was one of 45 states that picked stuffing as their favorite side dish, with Iowa, California, Utah, Wyoming and West Virginia siding with mashed potatoes.

The data also revealed several other key findings, including that 56% of Americans would prefer eating side dishes over their turkey on Thanksgiving. Roughly 4-of-10 Americans would also be content with having a plate made up of nothing but sides, according to the study.

Perhaps most importantly if you’re heading to a gathering this holiday season, 99% of Americans say they help to cook part of the Thanksgiving meal if they’re attending a gathering.



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Breaking down Rutgers’ bowl scenarios after losing golden opportunity vs. Illinois

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Breaking down Rutgers’ bowl scenarios after losing golden opportunity vs. Illinois


The dream postseason scenario was there for Rutgers … until it vanished in heartbreaking fashion.

Illinois not only sent Rutgers to one of its most-devastating losses of this century Saturday, it all but guaranteed Rutgers will not play in one of the Big Ten’s top-tier bowl games, too. With so much within grasp, including a program-defining victory, the ultimate prize was playing into position to earn a berth in Cheez-It Citrus Bowl.

Citrus Bowl scouts sat in the press box at SHI Stadium — and loved everything they saw — right up until the end when No. 24 Illinois stunned Rutgers with a miraculous, game-winning touchdown catch and run by senior Pat Bryant, which put the Illini over the top for a 38-31 victory.

What did the loss do to Rutgers and its postseason fate? With the loss, Rutgers fell right back into the middle of the Big Ten standings. After Saturday, Illinois and Iowa separated themselves from that pack. Rutgers, meanwhile, is now solidly in the thick of the muck with five other teams jostling for postseason positioning with one game remaining.

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So with that uncertainty, where might the Scarlet Knights end up? Here’s a look at where things currently stand and what’s available.

Big Ten bowls

These seven games are listed in order of ranking, meaning the Cheez-It Citrus Bowl will land the top-ranked Big Ten team that does not qualify for the CFP. The selection process then flows downward for the next six selections. It should be noted there are “variety clauses” to ensure new teams appear in each bowl in two to three years depending on the bowl.

Bowl game When/where vs. variety clause
Cheez-It Citrus Bowl Dec. 31 at 3 p.m. in Orlando, Fla. SEC No Iowa
ReliaQuest Bowl Dec. 31 at noon in Tampa Bay, Fla. SEC No Wisconsin
Duke’s Mayo Bowl Jan. 3 at 7 p.m. in Charlotte, N.C. ACC No Maryland
Music City Bowl Dec. 30 at 2:30 p.m. in Nashville, Tenn. SEC No Maryland
Pinstripe Bowl Dec. 28 at noon in New York, N.Y. ACC No Rutgers
Rate Bowl Dec. 26 at 5:30 p.m. in Phoenix, Ariz. Big 12 N/A
GameAbove Sports Bowl Dec. 26 at 2 p.m. in Detroit, Mich. MAC N/A

It’s also important to remember, the conference’s four newcomers — No. 1 Oregon, Washington, UCLA and USC — are not eligible for the seven games with Big Ten ties. The newcomers who achieve bowl eligibility and do not qualify for the College Football Playoff will be selected from the former Pac-12′s “legacy pool,” a list of six games for teams that played in the conference in 2023.

Where things stand

Three games to watch

Assuming Indiana makes the College Football Playoff, these three games will have the biggest impact on Rutgers’ selection. Conveniently, they will all be played before the Scarlet Knights take the field against Michigan State on Saturday at 3:30 p.m. in East Lansing.

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Minnesota at Wisconsin, Friday at noon: Minnesota could knock Wisconsin out of the picture, which would be good news for Rutgers and narrow the field. In the process, Minnesota might become a more attractive selection at 7-5 — even though Rutgers owns the head-to-head win. If Wisconsin win, it really muddles the picture.

Nebraska at Iowa, Friday at 7:30 p.m.: Iowa would be a heavy favorite for the ReliaQuest Bowl with a win. It would also keep Nebraska behind Rutgers in the standings if the Scarlet Knights win at Michigan State.

Michigan at Ohio State, Saturday at noon: Michigan will be a big underdog, but even with a loss a 6-6 Michigan team might be a more attractive selection than Rutgers.

Even with a win, Rutgers can’t theoretically play its way out of the muck. If the best-case scenario is the Duke’s Mayo or Music City Bowl, the committees will need to evaluate Rutgers as a better pick than Minnesota, Michigan, Nebraska or Wisconsin. That may be a long shot but not impossible.

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Patrick Lanni may be reached at planni@njadvancemedia.com.



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Illinois Basketball Fans Ask: Who Is Ed Cooley?

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Illinois Basketball Fans Ask: Who Is Ed Cooley?


If you’re an Illini fan today, you’re probably somewhere putting your feet up, basking in the glow of an epic come-from-behind football win and an iron-fisted basketball beatdown, and patting yourself on the back for a hard day’s work rooting on your favorite nationally ranked programs. Oh, and you’re undoubtedly asking yourself a question:

Who in the world is Ed Cooley?

Unless you’re a die-hard college basketball fan, you can be forgiven for scratching your head over the name. Cooley, the current coach of the Georgetown Hoyas and previously a longtime head man at Providence and Fairfield, doesn’t do a lot of business in the Midwest, or anywhere else – like, say, the NCAA Tournament – where you might have seen him often.

More to the point, what does Cooley have to do with the Illini? It’s a fair question – one that a lot of observers were asking in the wake of his postgame press conference after his Hoyas’ 82-65 win over Saint Francis on Saturday.

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Ostensibly, the subject of conversation was Hoyas guard Jayden Epps and his glowing defensive performance against the Red Flash, but it was the Illini (and, by implication, coach Brad Underwood and his staff) who wound up catching strays from 700 miles away.

Here’s a quick sound bite:

You may remember that Epps – a top high school prospect out of Norfolk, Virginia, a few years back – signed with Illinois and played his freshman season in Champaign. Had a pretty good year, too: averages of 9.5 points and 1.5 assists in 31 games, including 11 starts. But Epps bounced out of Illinois through the transfer portal – and wasn’t the first or last in the Underwood era – and landed at Georgetown.

Perhaps Cooley felt Epps was underappreciated in Champaign and thought he was defending his guy. Maybe he even thought he had been mistreated. But the message wasn’t a response or reaction – it was delivered unprompted, without further context or explanation. it was a calculated shot wrapped in an offhanded remark inside a monumentally dumb decision. Neither Cooley nor Epps gained anything from the comment. It just came off as sour grapes.

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Cooley must have recognized as much – or been instructed by an administrator that he had better – because he quickly apologized for the indiscretion. Sort of:

“My comment today was said in jest with one of my players, but I admit it was a poor choice of words,” Cooley posted on his X social media account. “I have the utmost respect for the University of Illinois, its men’s basketball program, coaches and players.”

For his part, Underwood blew off the beef when asked about Cooley’s comments in the postgame presser following Illinois’ 87-40 shellacking of Maryland Eastern Shore.

“My guys told me about it,” Underwood said. “That’s not even worth wasting my time on. I don’t know what he’s referencing that about. Jayden had a productive freshman year here. But I’m not getting into all that. I’ll let our fans have some fun with that, which I’m sure they probably are. But I’ve got Arkansas Little Rock to worry about and Arkansas to worry about and Northwestern to worry about and everybody else to worry about. I mean, I don’t read [the media’s] stuff, I’m sure as heck not gonna read his.”

Illini fans will surely have less tolerance and longer memories for this sort of thing than Underwood himself, so of course we’re rooting for an Illinois-Georgetown NCAA Tournament matchup. Because what’s March Madness without a little extra chaos?

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