Lifestyle
‘Sebastian’ re-writes the sex work movie
Ruaridh Mollica in Sebastian.
Kino Lorber
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Kino Lorber
“So, tell me about yourself” are the first words you hear in the film Sebastian, delivered softly but directly by a nervous man trying to avoid monotone.
For anyone who’s ever dated or used hookup apps before, the awkward tension is recognizable enough to send a shiver of embarrassment down your spine.
“What do you want to know?” responds the voice of a much younger man, in a tone that suggests he really wants to know why the other man is interested.
What follows, only two minutes into the film’s nearly two-hour runtime, are the intense sights and sounds of lovemaking that seems so real it will have you checking the movie’s rating. Although this sexual encounter between two men is clearly not love, it isn’t a quick anonymous hookup either. It’s a transaction.
The young man who calls himself Sebastian is a sex worker for the digital age — meeting clients online and making their dreams come true for an hour or two in real life. Sebastian’s name is actually Max, and he isn’t really after money. Rather, he’s mining his experiences for stories.
“He’s kind of desperate to get this debut novel,” said Sebastian’s writer and director Mikko Mäkelä, but Max’s desperation threatens to unravel his ambitions.
NPR’s Ayesha Rascoe spoke with Mäkelä and star Ruaridh Mollica about what the film has to say about authenticity, sex and different generations of queer men.
No big deal
Mikko Mäkelä’s own journey of self-discovery led him to Sebastian. He told NPR that when he first moved to London after finishing university, he was inspired by the matter-of-fact stories his friends told about sex work.
“It really seemed to be becoming almost another option in London’s gig economy,” Mäkelä said. “The threshold to going into sex work seemed to really have lowered and I really wanted to craft a portrait of a character for whom sex work is a choice rather than something done out of a lack of them.”
Mäkelä said that he wasn’t interested in creating yet another sex worker drama focused on trauma — but that he didn’t want Max to be void of conflict either. In fact, the character’s dueling lives threaten to overwhelm him throughout the film.
Ruaridh Mollica said he felt the conflict brewing within his role from the very first reading.
“That’s why he decides to do it under the alias of Sebastian at the start. And I think once you decide to keep it a secret, it’s almost like [it] kind of festers and it becomes harder and harder to admit it,” Mollica said. “I don’t think Max wanted to feel judged or was in a position with himself where he felt comfortable enough, and like, self-accepting enough to be judged.”
Mäkelä said he wants the audience to question their own biases as Max does in the film.
“I think there is definitely a lot of hypocrisy around that idea where the [publishing] industry might, you know, fetishize those stories, but … a publisher might still judge the writer who is also a sex worker,” he said.
Framing every sex worker as a victim, backed into a corner, isn’t always accurate or interesting (something Max eventually finds out in the film). Neither is a film where the sex seems unrealistic, Mäkelä said.
Sex should be real and shameless
Queer viewers — especially those who identify as male — will be struck by how true-to-life the sex scenes are in Sebastian. The movements, sounds and, er, shall we say “mechanics,” are so accurate you may question whether there’s any pretending at all.
“The sex scenes were such an integral part of the story that they had to be thought of in just the same way as [the] building blocks of character,” director Mäkelä told NPR. “I think it’s really important to continue to provide for representation of queer sex where certainly, you know, there is more and more in [the] media, but … it’s not always realistic.”
Mäkelä identifies as gay himself, and his star Ruaridh Mollica said the 35-year-old writer/director’s script was already quite thorough. Still, Mäkelä enlisted the help of intimacy coordinator Rufai Ajala.
“It’s also important to work with a queer intimacy coordinator who would, you know, kind of understand the anatomy in [a] detailed way to make sure that those scenes did ring true to two queer audience members,” Mäkelä said. “And it was also really important to have a range of sex scenes with different clients and kind of see different body types … and ages.”
In Sebastian, Ruaridh Mollica plays an aspiring novelist who turns to sex work to gather material.
Kino Lorber
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Kino Lorber
Sebastian is actor Ruaridh Mollica’s biggest role, and having to be close-to-nude for much of the film made it a challenging one. He said having an intimacy coordinator like Ajala on-set was crucial.
“I think intimacy coordinators are so important nowadays,” Mollica told NPR. “They will just set you up with the other actor and you’ll do all these experiences and workshops of safe touches and going through each other’s bodies with each other in a very respectful way, and building boundaries and just feeling safe and comfortable. After about half an hour, you would feel so relaxed and trusting with your co-actor.”
Mollica said that, beyond the intimacy coordinators, he was just lucky to have such talented and gracious scene partners, including character actor Jonathan Hyde.
Ageism among queer men
Mollica vividly recalls working with Hyde, who plays the one client his character meets who actually steals his heart.
“Jonathan Hyde is one of the most wonderful people I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with. He was just such a silly, fun guy,” Mollica told NPR. “He gave his whole heart to those scenes and really almost brought this energy into the air of like, ‘no, let’s, let’s live this and be real here.’ We all dropped our guard and just got to be a part of it. And I think those scenes are some of the most powerful because of that.”
Hyde’s character Nicholas is an older literature professor who’s recently lost his partner of 29 years. He is almost immediately vulnerable with Mollica’s much younger Sebastian, and what starts as a transactional relationship soon develops into something sweet.
“I really wanted through that encounter for Max to be surprised and the audience to be surprised as well,” Mäkelä said. “I really wanted to challenge Max in what his preconceptions about sex work had been, and and what his experiences thus far had been.”
Jonathan Hyde in Sebastian.
Kino Lorber
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And the surprise, in part, is that Max (or Sebastian) isn’t expecting to fall in love with a man so much older than he is. Because, well, as Mäkelä put it: “I think the gay community can be and generally is quite horribly ageist.”
“I think maybe on a subconscious level, even I was wanting to kind of work against those preconceptions. Like Max says as well, outside of these meetings, there might not really be many other venues in which these characters would have anything to do with one another,” he said.
In the film, Max is steadfast in including the love story between him and Jonathan Hyde’s character in his novel, even if the publishers aren’t convinced. Because as he says in the film “they’re transmitting queer history and culture and that’s something I want to talk about.”
In the end, actor Ruaridh Mollica said he’s learned as much about acting as he has about himself from becoming Sebastian.
“I feel so much more confident in myself after that. And even my body confidence, you know, having to be practically naked on set every day and knowing that’s going to be released and it really has just been a complete self-acceptance of my sexuality,” said Mollica, who identifies as queer. “You know, it’s something that I was open about with people around me, but not something I had talked about so publicly before.”
Sebastian is playing in select theaters now.
Lifestyle
‘Everything I knew burned down around me’: A journalist looks back on LA’s fires
A firefighter works as homes burn during the Eaton fire in the Altadena area of Los Angeles County, Calif., on Jan. 7, 2025.
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On New Year’s Eve 2024, journalist Jacob Soboroff was sitting around a campfire with a friend when he made an offhand comment that would come back to haunt him: The last thing he wanted to do in the new year, Soboroff said, was cover a story that would require donning a fire-safe yellow suit.
Just one week later, Soboroff was dressed in the yellow suit, reporting live from a street corner in Los Angeles as fire tore through the Pacific Palisades, the community where he was raised.
“This was a place that I could navigate with my eyes closed,” Soboroff says of the neighborhood. “Every hallmark of my childhood I was watching carbonize in front of me. … There were firefighters there and first responders and other journalists there, but it was an extremely lonely, isolating experience to be standing there as everything I knew burned down around me in real time.”

In his new book, Firestorm: The Great Los Angeles Fires and America’s New Age of Disaster, Soboroff offers a minute-by-minute account of the catastrophe, told through the voices of firefighters, evacuees, scientists and political leaders. He says covering the wildfires was the most important assignment he’s ever undertaken.
“The experience of doing this is something that I don’t wish on anybody, but in a way I wish everybody could experience,” he says. “It’s given me insane reverence for our colleagues in the local news community here, who, I think, definitionally were exercising a public service in the street-level journalism that they were doing and are still doing. … It was actually beautiful to watch because they are as much a first responder on a frontline as anybody else.”
Interview highlights
On the experience of reporting from the fires
You’re choking with the smoke. And I almost feel guilty describing it from my vantage point because the firefighters would say things to me like: “My eyeballs were burning. We were laying flat on our stomach in the middle of the concrete street because it was so hot, it was the only way that we could open the hoses full bore and try to save anything that we could.” …
I could feel the heat on the back of my neck as we stood in front of these houses that I remember as the houses that cars and people would line up in front of for the annual Fourth of July parade or the road race that we would run through town. Trees were on fire behind us — we were at risk of structures falling at any given minute. It was pretty surreal because this is a place I had spent so much time as a child and going back to as an adult. … I had no choice but to just open my mouth and say what I saw to the millions of people that were watching us around the country.
On undocumented immigrants being central to rebuilding the city

These types of massive both humanitarian and natural disasters give us X-ray vision for a time into sort of the fissures that are underneath the surface in our society. And Los Angeles, in addition to being one of the most unequal cities between the rich and the poor, has more undocumented people than virtually any other city in the United States of America. Governor Newsom knew that with the policies of the incoming administration, some of the very people that would be responsible for the cleanup and the rebuilding of Los Angeles may end up in the crosshairs of national immigration policy. And I think that that was an understatement. …
Pablo Alvarado in the National Day Laborer Organizing Network said to me that often the first people into a disaster — the second responders after the first — are the day laborers. They went to Florida after Hurricane Andrew, to New Orleans after Katrina, and they’d be ready to go in Los Angeles. And I went out and I cleaned up Altadena and Pasadena with some of them in real time.
And only months later did this wide-scale immigration enforcement campaign begin … on the streets of LA as sort of the Petri dish, the guinea pig for expanding this across the country. And it’s not an exaggeration to say that the parking lots of Home Depots, where workers [were] looking to get involved in the rebuilding of Los Angeles, has been ground zero for that enforcement campaign.
On efforts to rebuild
The pace is slow and it’s sort of a hopscotch of development. And I think for people who do come back, for people who can afford to come back, it’s going to be a long road ahead. You’re going to have half the houses on your street under construction for years to come. And for people that do inhabit those homes, it’s going to an isolating experience. But there’s an effort underway to rebuild. …
There’s also a lot of for-sale signs. And that’s the sad reality of this, is that there are people who, whether it’s that they can’t afford to come back … or that they just can’t stomach it, I think, sadly, a lot people are not going to be returning to their homes.
On what the Palisades and Altadena look like today

They both look like very big construction sites in a way. There are still some facades, some ruins of the more historic buildings in the Palisades. … But mostly it’s just empty lots. And in Altadena, the same thing. If you drive by the hardware store, the outside is still there. But it’s a patchwork of empty lots. Homes now under construction. And lots and lots of workers. … There are still a handful of people who are living in both the Palisades and in Altadena, but for the most part, these are communities where you’ve got workers going in during the day and coming out at night. …
We have designed this community to be one that’s in the crosshairs of a fire just like the one we experienced and that we will certainly, certainly experience again, because nobody’s packing it up and leaving Los Angeles. People may not return to their communities after they’ve lost their homes, but the ship has sailed on living in the wildland urban interface in the second largest city in the country.
On seeing this story, personally, as his “most important assignment”
Jacob Soboroff is a correspondent for MS NOW, formerly MSNBC.
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Jason Frank Rothenberg/HarperCollins
I don’t think I realized at the time how badly I needed the connections that I made in the wake of the fire, both with the people who have lost homes and the firefighters, first responders who were out there, but also honestly with my own family, my immediate family, my wife and my kids, my mom and my dad and my siblings and myself. I think that this was a really hard year in LA, and I think in the wake of the fire, I was experiencing some level of despair as well. Then the ICE raids happened here and sort of turned our city upside down. And this book for me was just this amazing cathartic blessing of an opportunity to find community with people I don’t think I ever would have otherwise spent time with, and to reconnect with people who I hadn’t seen or heard from in forever.
Anna Bauman and Nico Wisler produced and edited this interview for broadcast. Bridget Bentz, Molly Seavy-Nesper and Beth Novey adapted it for the web.

Lifestyle
The Best of BoF 2025: A Tough Year for Luxury
Lifestyle
Feeling cooped up? Get out of town with this delightful literary road trip
Tom Layward, the narrator and main character of Ben Markovits’ new novel, The Rest of Our Lives, introduces himself in a curious way: On the very first page of the book, he talks, matter-of-factly, about the affair his wife, Amy, had 12 years ago, when their two kids were young.
Amy, who’s Jewish, got involved at a local synagogue in Westchester; Tom, who was raised Catholic and is clearly not a joiner, remained on the sidelines. At the synagogue, Amy met Zach Zirsky, who Tom describes as “the kind of guy who danced with all the old ladies and little pigtailed girls at a bar mitzvah, so he could also put his arm around the pretty mothers and nobody would complain.”
After the affair came out, Tom and Amy decided to stay together for the kids: a boy named Michael and his younger sister, Miriam. But, Tom tells us “I also made a deal with myself. When Miriam goes to college you can leave, too.” The deal, Tom says, “helped me get through the first few months … [when] we had to pretend that everything was fine.”
Twelve years have since passed and the marriage has settled back into a state of OK-ness. Miriam, now 18, is starting college in Pittsburgh and because Amy is having a tough time with Miriam’s departure, Tom alone drives her to campus.
And, once Tom drops Miriam off, he just keeps driving, westward; without explanation to us or to himself; as though he’s a passenger in a driverless car that has decided to carry him across “the mighty Allegheny” and keep on going.

The three-page scene where Tom passively melds into the trans-continental traffic flow constitutes a master class on how to write about a character who is opaque to himself. “[Y]ou don’t feel anything about anything,” Amy says early on to Tom — an accusation that’s pretty much echoed by Tom’s old college girlfriend, Jill, whom he spontaneously drops in on at her home in Las Vegas, after being out of touch for roughly 30 years.
But, if Tom is distanced from his own feelings (and vague about the “issue” he had “with a couple of students” that forced him to take a leave from teaching in law school), he’s a sharp diagnostician of other people’s behavior. What fuels this road trip is Tom’s voice — by turns, wry, mournful and, oh-so-casually, astute.
There’s a strain of Richard Ford and John Updike in Tom’s tone, which I mean as a high compliment. Take, for instance, how Tom chats to us readers about a married couple who are old friends of his and Amy’s:
[Chrissie] was maybe one of those women who derives secret energy from the troubles of her friends. Her husband, Dick, was a perfectly good guy, about six-two, fat and healthy. He worked for an online tech platform. I really don’t know what he did.
So might most of us be summed up for posterity.

As Tom racks up miles, taking detours to visit other folks out of his past, like his semi-estranged brother, his meandering road trip accrues in suspense. There’s something else he’s subconsciously speeding away from here besides his marriage. Tom tells us at the outset that he’s suffering from symptoms his doctors ascribe to long COVID: dizziness and morning face swelling so severe that daughter Miriam jokingly calls him “Puff Daddy.” Shortly after he reaches the Pacific, Tom also lands in the hospital. “Getting out of the hospital,” Tom dryly comments, “is like escaping a casino, they don’t make it easy for you.”
The canon of road trip stories in American literature is vast, even more so if you count other modes of transportation besides cars — like, say, rafts. But, the most memorable road trips, like The Rest of Our Lives, notice the easy-to-miss signposts — marking life forks in the road and looming mortality — that make the journey itself everything.
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