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L.A. Affairs: After decades together we married for love — and his ‘forever’ health insurance

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L.A. Affairs: After decades together we married for love — and his ‘forever’ health insurance

For decades, Carlos and I weren’t married. And I didn’t mind. I built comedy material out of it and used it at L.A. clubs such as the Ice House and the Comedy Store:

“I’ve been in the same relationship for 25 years, and I’m still stuck with the word ‘boyfriend.’ How is it we come up with new words for technology every two minutes? Texting, sexting, Googling, pinging. But when it comes to extended relationships we’ve got: lover, domestic partner, significant other, longtime companion. Recently, someone did tell me about a new term: spousal equivalent. Spousal equivalent! Why does that sound like a sugar substitute to me? Carlos is my spousal equivalent. All the great taste of a husband and only half the commitment.”

The audience always laughed. And if Carlos was in the room, someone would inevitably glance at him and shake their head, as if he were the one dragging his feet. The truth was, I was fine not being married. It wasn’t just him. It was us.

Outside of comedy clubs, when I was asked why after close to 30 years we weren’t married, I would say: “We’re waiting to see if it’s going to work.” People thought that was hysterical. It wasn’t meant as a joke. We were very different people.

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There was a period when I started to call him my husband just to simplify things, but I was still as likely to call him boyfriend. “You’re very open about your relationships,” a woman once told me on Day 2 of a two-day conference. It took me a minute to realize she thought the man I referred to as “my husband” on the first day was different from the man I called “my boyfriend” the next.

For a long time, marriage wasn’t something we needed. We’d already built a home, a life, a circle of friends and a level of trust. But then I made a big career shift. After 30-plus years in advertising — comedy was my side gig — I stepped back from full-time agency leadership and went part-time by choice, finally giving my workaholism less oxygen. With that choice, though, I lost my healthcare. Suddenly, marriage wasn’t a punchline anymore.

Carlos had SAG-AFTRA coverage, the kind of “forever” insurance that came with vesting. If I became his legal spouse, I’d be protected too. So after three decades of spousal equivalency, we tied the knot. For love, yes, but also for health insurance.

Except “forever” wasn’t forever. During the COVID-19 pandemic, SAG-AFTRA stripped senior performers of their healthcare. Carlos lost his coverage. Spouses of senior performers got to stay on the plan until we were kicked off at 65 — the age I turned this year. The promise of permanence vanished.

Marriage, it turned out, didn’t just change our status. It also changed our relationship to the house. Before, we had owned it as “tenants in common,” each holding 50%. After we married, we could hold it as community property. Both of us fully owners. That felt permanent too.

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Until one day I heard about racial covenants in Los Angeles real estate. I pulled out the original 1921 deed and saw the words that would have disqualified both of us from living where we do:

“No part of said premises shall ever be leased, rented, sold or conveyed to any negro, or any person of African descent, or of the Mongolian race, or of any race other than the white or Caucasian race.”

Neither Carlos, who is Afro-Panamanian, nor I, being Jewish, would have been allowed to live here when that clause was written. We could only be here now because, after 1948, the courts said such covenants were unenforceable.

Suddenly, all I saw were the parallels. First, “forever” insurance that wasn’t forever. Then, “community property” that came with a deed that once rejected our very existence. Now, even the protections that allowed an interracial couple like us to marry in the first place — Loving v. Virginia — feel shakier than ever. Turns out both interracial marriage and racial covenants are protected by 14th Amendment rights. Just like Roe v. Wade was, and we all know how that turned out.

I never thought much about permanence until recently. I was happy with spousal equivalency, with the idea that every day Carlos and I chose each other without needing the state to ratify it. But age, illness and insurance have a way of forcing pragmatism onto romance.

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In Los Angeles, permanence has always been an illusion. Hillsides give way to landslides. Wildfires erase entire neighborhoods. Sanctuary policies are challenged, and immigration raids leave families shattered overnight. Even the freeways we once thought immovable split and buckle with time. Why should marriage or property be any different? Paperwork gets rewritten. Laws get repealed. Protections you thought were settled are suddenly up for debate.

The city reminds us daily that permanence is fragile. And yet, we stay. Not because the paperwork binds us, but because we choose to. After all those years of joking about “spousal equivalency,” it turns out the real equivalency is this: permanence on paper versus permanence in practice. We’ll take the latter, every time.

The author is a writer and storyteller for page, stage and the advertising industry. She lives in West Hollywood with her husband and Instagram-viral cat and dog. Visit her website at rochelle-newman.com.

L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.

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George Clooney gets French citizenship — and another dust-up with Trump

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George Clooney gets French citizenship — and another dust-up with Trump

The French government confirmed this week that it has granted citizenship to George and Amal Clooney — pictured on a London red carpet in October — and their 7-year-old twins.

Henry Nicholls/AFP via Getty Images


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Henry Nicholls/AFP via Getty Images

One of Hollywood’s most recognizable stars is now officially a French citizen.

A French government bulletin published last weekend confirms that the country has granted citizenship to George Clooney, along with his wife, human rights lawyer Amal Clooney, and their 7-year-old twins.

The Clooneys — who hail from Lexington, Ky. and Beirut, Lebanon, respectively — bought an 18th-century estate in Provence, France in 2021. In an Esquire interview this October, the Oscar-winning actor and filmmaker described the French “farm” as their primary residence, a decision he said was made with their kids in mind.

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“I was worried about raising our kids in LA, in the culture of Hollywood,” Clooney said. “I felt like they were never going to get a fair shake at life. France — they kind of don’t give a s*** about fame. I don’t want them to be walking around worried about paparazzi. I don’t want them being compared to somebody else’s famous kids.”

In another interview on his recent Jay Kelly press tour, Clooney mentioned that his wife and kids speak perfect French, joking that they use it to insult him to his face while he still struggles to learn the language.

This week, after a French official raised questions of fairness, France’s Foreign Ministry explained that the Clooneys were eligible under a law that permits citizenship for foreign nationals who contribute to the country’s international influence and cultural outreach, The Associated Press reports.

The French government specifically cited the actor’s clout as a global movie star and the lawyer’s work with academic institutions and international organizations in France.

“They maintain strong personal, professional and family ties with our country,” the ministry added, per the AP. “Like many French citizens, we are delighted to welcome Georges and Amal Clooney into the national community.”

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They aren’t the only ones celebrating. President Trump, who has a history of trading barbs with Clooney, welcomed the news by taking another dig at the actor.

In a New Year’s Eve Truth Social post, Trump called the couple “two of the worst political prognosticators of all time” and slammed Clooney for throwing his support behind then-Vice President Kamala Harris during the 2024 election.

“Clooney got more publicity for politics than he did for his very few, and totally mediocre, movies,” wrote Trump, who himself has made cameos in several films over the years. “He wasn’t a movie star at all, he was just an average guy who complained, constantly, about common sense in politics. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!”

Clooney responded the next day via a statement shared with outlets including Deadline and Variety.

“I totally agree with the current president,” Clooney said, before referencing the midterm elections later this year. “We have to make America great again. We’ll start in November.”

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Clooney and Trump — once friendly — have long criticized each other

Clooney, a longtime activist and Democratic Party donor, has remained active in U.S. politics despite his overseas move.

In July 2024, he rocked the political establishment by publishing a New York Times op-ed urging then-President Joe Biden — for whom he had prominently fundraised just weeks prior — to drop his reelection bid to make way for another Democrat with better chances of taking the White House. A growing chorus of calls led to Biden’s withdrawal from the race by the end of that month.

In a December interview with NPR’s Fresh Air, Clooney said his decision to speak out on that and other issues generally comes down to “when I feel like no one else is gonna do it.”

“You’ll lose all of your clout if you fight every fight,” he added. “You have to pick the ones that you know well, that you’re well informed on, and that you have some say and you hope that that has at least some effect.”

Clooney has been a vocal critic of Trump throughout both of his terms, most recently on the topic of press freedoms during the actor’s Broadway portrayal of the late journalist Edward R. Murrow last spring.

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And Trump has been similarly outspoken in his dislike of Clooney, including in an insult-laden Truth Social post — calling him a “fake movie actor” — after the publication of his New York Times op-ed.

In December, just days before this latest dust-up, Clooney shared in a Variety interview that he and Trump had been on good terms during the president’s reality television days. He said Trump used to call him often and once tried to help him get into a hospital to see a back surgeon.

“He’s a big goofball. Well, he was,” Clooney added. “That all changed.”

In the same Variety interview, Clooney — the son of longtime television anchor Nick Clooney — slammed CBS and ABC for abandoning their journalistic duty by paying to settle lawsuits with the Trump administration. He expressed concern about the current media landscape, particularly the direction of CBS News under its controversial new editor in chief, Bari Weiss.

Weiss responded by inviting Clooney to visit the CBS Broadcast Center to learn more about their work, in a written statement published in the New York Post on Tuesday. It began with “Bonjour, Mr. Clooney,” in a nod to the actor’s new milestone.

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Clooney told NPR last month that he will continue to stand up for what he believes in, even if it means people who disagree with him decide not to see his movies.

“I don’t give up my right to freedom of speech because I have a Screen Actors Guild card,” he added. “The minute that I’m asked to just straight-up lie, then I’ve lost.”

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Possible measles exposure detected in Ky. after unvaccinated traveler visits Ark Encounter

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Possible measles exposure detected in Ky. after unvaccinated traveler visits Ark Encounter

LOUISVILLE, Ky. (WDRB) — Kentucky health officials are warning the public of possible measles exposures in northern Kentucky earlier this week. 

A post on the Kentucky Department for Public Health’s Facebook page said it “identified potential measles exposures in Grant County.” According to the post, the exposure was traced to “an unvaccinated, out-of-state traveler” who stayed at the Holiday Inn & Suites in Dry Ridge from Dec. 28-30.” That person also visited the Ark Encounter on Dec. 29.

Measles, a highly contagious respiratory virus, can cause serious health problems, especially in young children, according to the CDC’s website. The virus spreads through the air after someone infected coughs or sneezes. It can then linger for up to two hours after the infected person leaves. 

The virus can also be spread if someone touches surfaces that an infected person has touched. Symptoms include a cough, runny nose and red eyes, followed by white spots that appear on the face and down the body. Two doses of the MMR (measles, mumps and rubella) vaccine is the best protection against measles, according to health officials.

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Contact your healthcare provider if you think you or someone in your family may have been exposed.

More Local News:

Here’s a look at who’s running and what’s at stake in Kentucky’s 2026 elections

Woman critical after shooting at American Legion post in Parkland early Thursday

Woman dies after shooting outside fast food restaurant in downtown Louisville near NuLu

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Contract details reveal when Kentucky could seek repayment from BlueOval SK

Federal judge dismisses consent decree meant to spark police reform in Louisville

Dozens of vacancies raise safety concerns at Louisville Metro Corrections

Louisville doctors urge prevention as flu cases surge after the holidays

LMPD detective shared login to Flock camera system with DEA agent conducting immigration search

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Copyright 2026 WDRB Media. All Rights Reserved.

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Sunday Puzzle: New newsmakers of 2025

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Sunday Puzzle: New newsmakers of 2025

On-air challenge

Every year around this time I present a “new names in the news” quiz. I’m going to give you some names that you’d probably never heard before 2025 but that were prominent in the news during the past 12 months. You tell me who or what they are.

1. Zohran Mamdani

2. Karoline Leavitt

3. Mark Carney

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4. Robert Francis Prevost (hint: Chicago)

5. Jeffrey Goldberg (hint: The Atlantic)

6. Sanae Takaichi

7. Nameless raccoon, Hanover County, Virginia

Last week’s challenge

Last week’s challenge came from Joseph Young, of St. Cloud, Minn. Think of a two-syllable word in four letters. Add two letters in front and one letter behind to make a one-syllable word in seven letters. What words are these?

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Challenge answer

Ague –> Plagued / Plagues / Leagues

Winner

Calvin Siemer of Henderson, Nev.

This week’s challenge

This week’s challenge is a numerical one from Ed Pegg Jr., who runs the website mathpuzzle.com. Take the nine digits — 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. You can group some of them and add arithmetic operations to get 2011 like this: 1 + 23 ÷ 4 x 5 x 67 – 8 + 9. If you do these operations in order from left to right, you get 2011. Well, 2011 was 15 years ago.  Can you group some of the digits and add arithmetic symbols in a different way to make 2026? The digits from 1 to 9 need to stay in that order. I know of two different solutions, but you need to find only one of them.

If you know the answer to the challenge, submit it below by Thursday, January 8 at 3 p.m. ET. Listeners whose answers are selected win a chance to play the on-air puzzle.

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