Health
Should Your Partner Really Be Your Best Friend?
Stephanie Lopez is effusive about her husband’s good qualities. He is a man of character, kindness and integrity, she said. He is a loving father and treats her with respect.
But is he her best friend?
“No!” said Ms. Lopez, who is 43 and lives on Hawaii’s Big Island.
“I don’t have sex with my friends,” she explained. “I don’t pay bills with my friends. And I guarantee you, if I did, it would change the whole dynamic of the relationship.”
The belief that your partner should be your best friend pops up everywhere, whether on social media or in the greeting card aisle. It’s not unusual to seek a romantic partner who fulfills more than the role of spouse, co-parent or lover, said Alexandra Solomon, a clinical psychologist and host of the “Reimagining Love” podcast.
“We want somebody who sees us and gets us,” Dr. Solomon said. “Well, that’s the same darn thing we want in our friendships. We really are craving that same sense of affinity and admiration.”
But is it unreasonable to expect your bedmate to be your best friend, or is it the highest form of intimacy?
A Spouse’s Ever-Changing Role
Jennifer Santiago, 42, and her husband are best friends.
The couple, who began dating in high school, have broken up briefly over the years, taking time apart to get to know themselves and what they want out of life. But their underlying friendship brought them back together every time, said Ms. Santiago, who lives in Orlando.
“There was always an empty void when we took a break,” she said. They realized: “Wow, we really, truly do everything together!”
Historically, that is a relatively new approach to romantic relationships, said Eli J. Finkel, a social psychologist and the author of “The All-Or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work.”
Until the mid-1800s, marriage in the United States mostly revolved around ensuring partners had their basic needs (like food and shelter) met — what Dr. Finkel calls the “pragmatic era.” Between 1850 and 1965, marriage entered the “love-based era” — in which the primary relationship functions were about love and companionship, he said. Since then, we have been in the “self-expressive” era — in which marriage is about not only love, but also personal growth.
“The marital relationship has taken on more and more responsibility for our social and psychological needs,” Dr. Finkel said.
How to Set Realistic Expectations
Is it a good or bad thing that many people now expect their romantic relationships to fulfill so many roles in their lives? Ultimately, that depends on “whether your relationship can deliver,” said Dr. Finkel, who is also a co-host of the “Love Factually” podcast.
He feels “delighted” for people who say they want their romantic partners to also be their best friends. But he suggests they consider: Are there other expectations they can let go of? For instance, he said, it is a lot to expect your partner to be the co-chief executive of the household, to split child care, to be your exclusive sexual companion and to be your best friend.
“I don’t want to sound like a scold,” Dr. Finkel said. “I just want people to be aware that every additional expectation that you’re throwing on top of your relationship comes with opportunity for enhanced closeness — and it comes with additional risk that the relationship will buckle under the weight of those expectations.”
He suggested releasing some of that pressure. Can you lean on other friends for emotional support? Are you OK being emotionally close to your partner, but not necessarily having the spiciest intimate life together?
Dr. Solomon believes that friendship, particularly best friendship, is not a requisite for long-term intimacy. But it doesn’t hurt either, she said.
Liking your partner — which she described as admiring them, finding them funny, caring about their worldview, and having fun simply being together — can “cushion” the other relationship challenges a couple might face, she said.
But Dr. Solomon admitted that while she adores her husband of 26 years, he is not her best friend. “My best friend’s name is Ali, and she lives in Seattle,” she said. “She’s been in that spot since we were 10 years old.”
Ultimately, maintaining a tight romantic bond may come down to managing expectations and clearly discussing them, said Adam Fisher, president of the American Psychological Association’s division for couple and family psychology.
Dr. Fisher had a mentor who described marriage and relationships as best friendship plus sex. While he thinks that is one “very viable” approach to a relationship, he said, it is by no means the only one.
“Couples need some kind of ‘glue’ — commitment, shared values, sex, finances — something,” he said, but it doesn’t need to be friendship.
Ms. Lopez is opting out of the bedmate-as-BFF paradigm.
“I think we put so many expectations and responsibilities on our partners,” she said. “I’m not here to be everything and all things to you.”
new video loaded: Wii Bowling Takes Over Tulsa Retirement Homes
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transcript
Wii Bowling Takes Over Tulsa Retirement Homes
Retirement communities in Tulsa, Okla., compete against one another in a Nintendo Wii Sports bowling league.
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“That’s how you win.” “There you go, Ron.” “Way to go.”
By Nick Oxford, Alisa Shodiyev Kaff and Alexandra E. Petri
June 19, 2026
NEWYou can now listen to Fox News articles!
As the popularity of GLP-1 drugs continues to climb, significant weight loss associated with the medications has been linked to a growing list of cosmetic concerns.
Some surgeons report that more patients are seeking treatments for so-called “Ozempic earlobes,” which reportedly appear thinner, longer or more sagging after the loss of facial fat.
“The use of semaglutides causes you to lose fat across your body, including the small, fat pads of the earlobes,” facial plastic surgeon Sachin S. Parikh, MD, told NewBeauty.
OZEMPIC, OTHER SEMAGLUTIDES LINKED TO HAIR LOSS: HERE’S WHAT TO KNOW
“It’s important to note that semaglutides do not damage ear tissue or affect hearing in any way, so any intervention would be purely cosmetic,” added the California-based doctor.
Some of the potential treatments for “Ozempic earlobes” may include dermal filler, fat transfer, laser treatments or surgical earlobe reduction, according to the report.
As the popularity of GLP-1 drugs continues to climb, significant weight loss associated with the medications has been linked to a growing list of cosmetic concerns. (iStock)
Dr. Mohammed Asif from Duly Health and Care in Naperville, Illinois, said that while he hasn’t personally noticed an uptick in ear surgeries, he has seen a rise in other procedures due to GLP-1-triggered weight loss.
Some of those include panniculectomies (Ozempic skin removal surgery) and abdominoplasties (tummy tucks).
PLASTIC SURGERY TRENDS TAKE A SURPRISING TURN, AS DOCTORS SEE MORE PATIENTS ‘SIZING DOWN’
“There has been a significant increase in body contouring procedures among patients with GLP-1 weight loss,” Asif told Fox News Digital.
“In my practice, I’ve seen a significant surge in breast lifts, panniculectomies (skin removal surgery), abdominoplasties (tummy tucks), brachioplasties (arm lifts) and thighplasties due to weight loss.”
TOP COSMETIC PROCEDURES REVEALED IN NEW REPORT: WHAT’S TRENDING AND WHY
Healing and recovery are “far greater and less complicated” than with bariatric surgery weight loss, Asif noted.
“This is due to the gradual weight loss achieved over time with GLP-1s.”
“Ozempic breast” is another common complaint, according to Dr. Michael Omidi, a double board-certified plastic surgeon practicing in Beverly Hills.
“There has been a significant increase in body contouring procedures among patients with GLP-1 weight loss,” a doctor told Fox News Digital. (iStock)
“Women in their 30s and 40s would not typically need a breast lift, but when you’re taking drugs like Ozempic or Wegovy that cause rapid weight loss, women can see gravity take its toll on their breasts,” he told Fox News Digital.
“When women, especially younger ones, lose fat too fast, it causes the breasts, which are comprised of fat, glandular tissue and skin, to lose volume,” he went on. “The skin and supporting ligaments don’t always bouce back at the same rate as the weight loss, resulting in breasts that can appear saggy and deflated.”
NEW OBESITY TREATMENT MAY HELP PRESERVE MUSCLE DURING WEIGHT LOSS
Dr. Samuel Golpanian, a double board-certified plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills, said he has seen “dozens” of patients – men and women alike – seeking treatments for so-called “Ozempic butt” after significant weight loss.
“This is an unintended consequence of taking GLP-1s,” he told Fox News Digital.
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“Such dramatic weight loss in a short period of time causes the skin not to tighten quickly enough to keep up with the body’s changes. Our buttocks have a large amount of fat, so when that volume disappears quickly, you’ll develop a flatter, saggier behind.”
“Such dramatic weight loss in a short period of time causes the skin not to tighten quickly enough to keep up with the body’s changes,” a surgeon said. (iStock)
Kristy Hamilton, MD, a Houston-based surgeon who is a member of the American Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS), agreed that a growing number of patients are seeking skin-tightening procedures after losing large amounts of weight with GLP-1s.
“We’re absolutely seeing more of those patients, and I expect that trend to continue,” said Hamilton in an ASPS report.
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“People are losing as much as 100 pounds on this medication – and when you’re losing that amount, that’s significant. You’re certainly going to have excess skin afterward.”
The ASPS lists the following body-contouring procedures as the ones most frequently performed after substantial weight loss.
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- Tummy tuck (abdominoplasty): Removes excess abdominal skin and fat
- Lower body lift (belt lipectomy): Addresses the abdomen, buttocks, hips and thighs
- Arm lift (brachioplasty): Removes hanging upper-arm skin
- Thigh lift: Tightens excess skin of the inner thighs
- Breast lift (mastopexy): Addresses sagging, deflated breasts after weight loss
- Facelift/neck lift: Addresses facial volume loss and skin laxity after major weight loss
“People are losing as much as 100 pounds on this medication – and when you’re losing that amount, that’s significant. You’re certainly going to have excess skin afterward.” (iStock)
Experts say adequate protein intake and resistance training can help minimize the loss of lean muscle mass that often accompanies rapid weight loss, which could reduce some of the cosmetic concerns.
Golpanian also emphasized the importance of eating enough protein.
TEST YOURSELF WITH OUR LATEST LIFESTYLE QUIZ
“It can be harder since your appetite is suppressed, but it’s so important to consume at least 110 grams of protein a day while taking a GLP-1 drug,” he advised.
“Also, I say this to my patients all the time: You have to lift weights to keep your muscles from atrophying. Strength training can help build muscles and preserve your glutes.”
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