FIRSTBORN: A Memoir, by Lauren Christensen

There are two fierce, fragile fighters in “Firstborn,” Lauren Christensen’s touching memoir about the life and death of her tiny daughter, Simone, who was stillborn 22 weeks into Christensen’s pregnancy. The great accomplishment of this book is that I feel I have gotten to know and care for both tenacious people — perhaps Simone a little more than her mother, through her mother’s book.

Christensen’s journey starts in her 30s with a series of unforeseeable events, all told with dry, offhand charm. These begin when Christensen surprises herself by loving a novel with a taxi-yellow cover that crosses her desk at The New York Times Book Review, where she works as an editor. Smitten, she finishes it in one sitting and, when she runs into a colleague, surprises herself further — while maybe a little bit high on “tiny edibles” — by praising the book to the skies yet struggling to recall its title. (In what is either a running gag or an act of assiduous restraint, she never names it in her memoir, but there are enough clues for a reader to identify it as Gabriel Bump’s 2020 novel “Everywhere You Don’t Belong.”) After the review runs, the author follows her on Twitter and she follows him back; one thing leads to another until finally — after much video chatting during Covid lockdowns — they fall madly, unstoppably in love and buy a house together.

Christensen’s narrative style underlines interesting particulars while sliding over much that we are left to guess at. What we don’t know, we may not need to know. (To paraphrase Henry James, there are some conversations we are not meant to overhear.) One of my favorite passages in the book concerns the way Christensen both did and did not want a child. Astutely, she notices every waver, every “maybe, but.” According to her, “A life with Gabe alone seemed to me as full as a life could possibly be.” According to her sensible therapist, to whom Christensen gives full credit, “if I was neither menopausal nor using any form of birth control, she said, then I was trying to become pregnant.” And so she does.

Yet in the kind of foreshadowing that life offers, the pregnancy is touched from the start by mortality. As Christensen undergoes routine ultrasounds and meets her midwife, her family is simultaneously grieving and supporting her beloved grandfather Gong Gong, who is suffering from Parkinson’s and memory failure at the end of his long life. Christensen asserts his right — and hers, and ours — to be something other than dignified, to be “miraculous and embarrassing, fundamentally ungovernable” in our bodies. “Despite our delusions,” she writes, “none of us ever had much control over our lives, or our deaths, at all.”

It is not news that Eddie Howe is meticulous. One step further is probably fair. Eddie Howe is the chief obsessive in a city filled with them.

Holding onto a 1-0 lead in the Carabao Cup final and 45 minutes away from breaking a 56-year trophy-less hoodoo, Howe did not turn to words alone for his half-time team talk. He had faith in his preparation.

He had faith in his slideshow.

As the players trooped in, moments after Dan Burn’s header had put them into the lead, Howe was waiting with information. His presentation contained the physical statistics from Newcastle’s past two months of matches — showing a marked dip at the start of the second half. He implored his players not to do the same at Wembley.

“We have been guilty of protecting leads in the past,” Burn told The Athletic post-match. “We just wanted to not take a backward step and really push forward.”

“Get after them,” Joelinton added. “Don’t change anything.”

They did all that and more. After 53 minutes, Newcastle burst forward down the left and Jacob Murphy’s knock-down fell to Alexander Isak. The Swedish striker had already had a goal ruled out for offside moments earlier. Not this time.

His shot found the corner of the Liverpool goal, and in holding on for a 2-1 win, Howe was catapulted onto Newcastle United’s Mount Rushmore. This is the inside story of the day and the game plan that got them there.

Two years ago, Newcastle smarted with regret after a 2-0 loss to Manchester United. That day was not their brand of football — they were meek, wan, and emotionally empty. Howe has later admitted that, post-match, he was not mentally in a healthy place.

But losing had significance. It brought lessons and resolve. The mantra emanating from Newcastle’s Benton training base was simple, but it resonated. This time, things would be done differently.

On Newcastle’s last trip to Wembley, the day felt long. The squad stayed opposite the stadium, the countdown to kick-off beginning the moment the curtains opened.

This year, Howe imparted the importance of staying elsewhere to the club’s logistical staff — opting for a Hertfordshire hotel, where they could have a gentle morning before travelling to the stadium in the early afternoon.

“This time, we tried to take away as many distractions as we could,” Howe said post-game. “We tried to make it very similar to a Premier League build-up. I think staying at a quieter hotel was really important.”

“Today, just driving into the stadium itself, it all felt so different,” another member of club staff remarked post-game. “It was focused — there wasn’t that emotion.”

Of course, it is impossible to completely escape a city’s feelings and expectations, especially when the club’s all-time leading scorer, Alan Shearer, texts the club captain, Bruno Guimaraes, on the eve of the game. His message was not one spewing emotion, but a clinical instruction: “Bring that trophy back.”

That sentiment was echoed by the supporters, who re-displayed a flag from the Arsenal semi-final — “Get into them” — which Howe has privately acknowledged as his favourite banner, marking the core standard he wants his team to set.

But Howe being Howe, he did not send his team out with those words alone. Arne Slot’s Liverpool are a buzzsaw, marching unchallenged towards the Premier League table. Newcastle needed their own weapons.

Newcastle’s coaches identified early in their preparations that they felt Liverpool could be exploited from set pieces. Though their team shape was not finalised until after the West Ham United game on Monday night, their corner routines for the final have been practised for the past two weeks.

Newcastle’s staff feel Burn should score more from corners given his physical advantages and have emphasised the importance of delivering the ball into areas where he is likely to be first to the ball. By peeling off the back, away from the six-yard box, Burn could take advantage of Liverpool’s zonal defending. The header itself is made harder, further away from goal, but it places Burn up against Liverpool’s smaller blockers — in this case, Alexis Mac Allister — rather than centre-backs Virgil van Dijk and Ibrahima Konate.

Burn towers over Mac Allister to do what he hadn’t been doing in training: score (James Gill – Danehouse/Getty Images)

After 45 minutes, their plan came off — Burn powering past Mac Allister to bounce his header home. It was Newcastle’s first goal at Wembley in 25 years.

“If you’d seen us in practice, you’d have thought we had no chance,” Howe told Sky Sports afterwards. “Dan will be the first to admit he hasn’t practised like that, so when he scored, Jason (Tindall) and I turned to each other and couldn’t believe he scored.”

Slot put it even more bluntly — “I have never seen in my life a player from that far away heading a ball with that force into the far corner. Credit to him. Few players can score a goal from that distance with his head.”

Burn’s header that surprised Slot and Howe (Michelle Mercer/Newcastle United via Getty Images)

Newcastle had been deliberate in their preparations, with Howe admitting to hiding parts of their repertoire when they played Liverpool less than three weeks ago. This was a sacrifice — they looked passive in a 2-0 defeat — but even if they miss out on Champions League qualification by a point, it will pale against Wembley’s significance.

“We still wanted to win that game,” Howe insisted after Sunday’s win. “We just did it in a different way.”

In some ways, he was helped by necessity. Lewis Hall’s injury, suffered during that defeat, was viewed as a significant blow — it is a position where Newcastle are low on options after Lloyd Kelly’s departure to Juventus in January. But the great coaches are those who adapt when Plan A fails — and Howe found the positives in what he had.

Ordinarily, shuffling a right-back onto their weaker side to face Mohamed Salah, the world’s in-form right-winger, would be a major no-no. In Matt Targett, Howe had a specialist left-back, albeit one who had played barely any football in the past 18 months.

But Newcastle’s coaching staff felt positive about Tino Livramento, who is seen as a better one-on-one defender than Hall due to his pace. Additionally, they emphasised to Livramento that his right-footedness could become an advantage. If Salah cut inside, Livramento would be on his stronger right foot to make a challenge — while, with Burn instructed to double up inside, Livramento could force him wide without fear of being isolated and beaten.

Shifting Livramento also opened up his right-back berth, giving Howe and Tindall the luxury of selecting Kieran Trippier, who possesses the best set-piece delivery in the squad. With ordinary taker Anthony Gordon ruled out through suspension, Trippier had a chance to play regardless of Hall’s injury given the importance Newcastle placed on dead-ball opportunities. In the event, it was the 34-year-old’s cross that assisted Burn’s goal.

Howe’s other major selection question was on the left wing, deciding how to replace Gordon. While Joe Willock offers a huge work rate out of possession and a dangerous carrying ability, Howe decided relatively early in the week that Harvey Barnes was his preferred option.

The match against West Ham on Monday evening had been the winger’s first start in three months and Howe liked what he saw as Barnes assisted the game’s only goal. Fitness-permitting, Newcastle would be unchanged.

In attack, their plan hinged on pressuring Liverpool’s full-backs rather than their elite-level centre-backs. Isak often drifted left, with Barnes instead cutting inside. Makeshift right-back Jarell Quansah was left unsure which to pick up, a job made more difficult by deeper inside runs from Joelinton and Bruno Guimaraes, isolating the Liverpool defender.

This made space for Livramento to carry the ball upfield and though he was still on his weaker side, he had extra time to pick out the technically difficult left-footed cross. This created Newcastle’s second goal — Murphy outmuscling Liverpool’s other full-back, Andy Robertson, to nod down for Isak to score.

Just wait for that Isak celebration! 😍⚫️⚪️#EFL | #CarabaoCupFinal pic.twitter.com/PAEBtZ4QtH

— Carabao Cup (@Carabao_Cup) March 16, 2025

Advertisement

But though these were the frills Newcastle needed to score, it was not the core reason they were able to compete. That fell to Newcastle’s midfield trio — Sandro Tonali, Guimaraes, and Joelinton. To Liverpool, their collective of black and white shirts must have felt like prison bars.

Before kick-off, Tonali was the only player on either side to hand his warm-up jacket back to the kitman perfectly folded. It summed up a player who emerged from the day’s chaos with simple passes to get Newcastle moving forward.

Guimaraes devoted himself to winning midfield duels, often against two or three — by full-time, the only thing he had left to give were tears.

Tonali was at the heart of Newcastle’s performance (Serena Taylor/Newcastle United via Getty Images)

But Joelinton was the heart of Newcastle’s win — a player whose transformation, whose career, is now synonymous with Howe. He is the head coach’s greatest individual success.

Having suffered a knee injury in early February, missing the semi-final second-leg and the Liverpool game among others, it was not until the FA Cup defeat to Brighton two weeks ago that he proved his fitness.

Though always expected to be fit, there had been lingering concerns over what-ifs all the same. Newcastle’s staff felt their plan would only work if the midfielder was fully healthy. Howe aimed to exploit his midfield’s physical edge — being direct, physical, and aerially dominant was a requirement, not a possibility.

When Joelinton barrelled Quansah off the ball midway through the first half, screaming to the Newcastle fans as he did so, it epitomised Newcastle’s ambition. Football matches are decided by micro-wins adding up to big moments — these were Joelinton’s domain.

Guimaraes completed Shearer’s mission (Serena Taylor/Newcastle United via Getty Images)

One of these came just one minute into the second half, with Newcastle still a single goal up, and Diogo Jota at the byline and cutting the ball back. But Joelinton had listened to Howe’s slideshow — if he can come back from how his Newcastle career began, he can come back 40 yards in a cup final to block Salah’s goalbound shot.

This was Salah’s only real moment of danger. With Trent Alexander-Arnold out, Liverpool’s main way to build up play — short of hopeful long balls — was beating Newcastle’s initial press and playing through the midfield. They never came close to doing it; Dominik Szoboszlai was marked to the point of extinction by Joelinton, while Howe held his wingers tight to ensure Guimaraes and Tonali had simple reads to spring and win their duels. Salah was reduced to chasing hopeful punts.

By the time Liverpool’s final heave landed, Joelinton was on his knees, pointing to the sky. Guimaraes wept uncontrollably.

In the royal box, Newcastle owner and PIF chairman Yasir Al-Rumayyan pounded his phone for 30 minutes after the game, leaving voice notes and sending messages. Newcastle are awaiting Saudi Arabian sign-off for upgrades to both their training base and stadium; shiny metal silverware does help things get done.

If decisions are still to be taken over Newcastle’s long-term future, the short-term was set. The players streamed towards Wembley’s Box Park. Those not on international duty will fly to Dubai on Monday for a warm-weather training camp. Remember, Howe is meticulous.

But as the final whistle blew and Newcastle’s players streamed onto the pitch, Howe stared, wide-eyed, and spun before falling into Tindall’s arms. For the first time on Sunday, he and Newcastle did not know what to do.

(Top photo: Stu Forster/Getty Images)

There’s not too much shame in a botched March Madness bracket. The NCAA Tournament is compressed chaos in single elimination, upsets are part of the game, and only one entrant can actually win it all.

What we can’t forgive is a lazy, uninspired bracket name.

The men’s and women’s tournaments give us a wealth of punnable school, player and coach names to choose from — even an arena or two. Here are this correspondent’s favorite puns and frivolities for 2025 bracket names. Give us yours in the comments below.

Men’s

Ok, Broomer — For those who see Auburn as an inevitability, go with their star, Johni Broome. These are not your postwar Tigers.

Green Flaggs — A lot of folks will swipe right on the Blue Devils if their megastar Cooper Flagg is healthy.

Lipsey’s Hustle — The marathon continues for Tamin Lipsey, Iowa State and the Fightin’ Otzelbergers.

Knuck If You Buzz — Texas A&M head coach Buzz Williams has the sheer intensity and righteous passion of prime Lil Scrappy.

Let’s Get Oweh From It All — To Kentucky’s Otega Oweh: “Let’s take a boat to Bermuda, let’s take a plane to Lexington.”

Yes, UConn — For the Huskies believers.

No, UConn’t — For people who actually watched UConn this season.

Creighton for a Star to Fall — The name whispered on the wind was, in fact, “Ryan Kalkbrenner.”

Caleb Love and Basketball — For what? Our hearts, of course. And an Arizona run.

Caleb Grillz — Missouri bucket-getter Caleb Grill has his whole top diamond and the bottom row gold … we think.

Littlejohn and the Eastside Boyz — Chase Hunter and Clemson have forced their tourney seeding to Get Low. Looking to bring some hardware back to Littlejohn Coliseum.

Frankie Fidler on the Roof — To life, to life, to Sparty. Tevye would’ve trusted Michigan State’s Tom Izzo in March.

Love (Ma)shack — It’s a lil’ old place where we can get together … and make Alabama really upset. Tennessee’s Jahmai Mashack had one of the coolest moments of this college season.

LJ Cryer and the Infinite Sadness — A [Houston] Cougar with Butterfly Wings. Underestimate whatever that is at your own peril.

Queen’s Gambit — Maryland’s freshman center Derik Queen is the tallest, fleetest turtle we’ve ever seen.

Kameron Presents…the (Golden) Diplomats — Based on Marquette’s guard Kameron Jones. Does that make David Joplin Juelz Santana?

Silkk Da Shaka — Another great Marquette play.

Toppin My Collar — For those both appreciating Texas Tech’s resurgence (and star JT Toppin) and wishing it was 2005 again.

“What Are You Doing in My Swamp?!”— The Florida Gators would win and cover against Lord Farquaad.

Rick Pitino’s Bodega Corner — The Johnnies have taken New York by (red) storm.

Throw it Down, Big Man —For those wanting to honor the late Bill Walton.

One Shining Moment — For those wanting to honor the late Greg Gumbel.

Grant Nelson’s Mustache —  In celebration of the sport’s modern canon.

The Parentheses Preferers — Who needs brackets? Proper punctuation prevents poor performance.

Tar Heels and Glass Slippers — Maybe, just maybe, there’s someone out there who has UNC making a Cinderella turn.

The Floor Slappers Federation — Yup, it’s about that time.

Women’s

Elementary, My Dear Watkins — For those who fashion JuJu Watkins and the Trojans as “A Study in Scarlet.”

JuJu Fruit — We’re sweet on JuJu and USC.

For Bueckers or Worse — Paige Bueckers is the superstar, but Sarah Strong and Azzi Fudd also balled out this year.

For Auriemma, Forever Ago — Do we think UConn’s iconic coach, Geno Auriemma, knows who or what Bon Iver is?

Place Your Betts — UCLA and Lauren Betts could certainly cash out after their inspired Big Ten tourney performance.

Dawn and On — South Carolina and Dawn Staley pursue their fourth national title of this era. We’ll take every opportunity to hear more Erykah Badu.

Boom Boom Paopao — The WNBA-bound Gamecock Te-Hina Paopao is so 3008.

The Van, The Lith, The Legend — TCU’s superstar Hailey Van Lith just put in work as the MVP of the Big 12 Tournament.

Hidalgo To Bed — Don’t sleep on Notre Dame (or Hannah Hidalgo) despite the late-season slump.

Came Out a Beast — Flau’jae Johnson is nice on the boards and in the booth.

Taylor Jones’ Block Party — Everyone’s invited. Texas is tough in the frontcourt.

Wes is Moore — A guiding mantra. NC State’s sideline strategist Wes Moore is the ACC’s Coach of the Year.

Lawson’s Creek — For those switching over to Duke (coached by Kara Lawson) after their conference tournament title. Casting recommendation: Michelle Williams as Toby Fournier.

O.K., Sooner — We brought it back one time for those rolling with Raegan Beers and Oklahoma.

(Illustration: Kelsea Petersen / The Athletic; Harry How / Getty Images, Grant Halverson / Getty Images, Kevin C. Cox / Getty Images)