Connect with us

Finance

I find it impossible to save money. A financial therapist helped me see the 3 reasons I can't stop spending.

Published

on

I find it impossible to save money. A financial therapist helped me see the 3 reasons I can't stop spending.

Like other millennials, my wealth blossomed during the pandemic. Receiving stimulus checks, collecting unemployment after losing my part-time job, and (most importantly) not going out added more to my savings than I ever thought feasible a year before.

It was time to bring in a professional. I booked a session with Amanda Clayman, a financial therapist who hosts Fresh Produce Media’s Audible series “Emotional Investment.” I’d interviewed Clayman in the past and tried to follow some of her advice, but still felt stuck on learning exactly how to budget.

Our appointment resembled a typical therapy session: I filled out an intake form beforehand, answering questions about my earliest experiences with money. Then, we spoke for an hour about my concerns, with Clayman focusing less on specific budgeting hacks and more on how money ties into my identity — something I never thought about before.

The session made me realize where most of my money is going, and what I can do to curb the spending.

My people-pleasing habits literally cost me

I’m great at avoiding impulse purchases for myself.

Advertisement

Where spending blurs for me is doing anything socially. I say yes to meals with multiple appetizers and $20 cocktails, spa days, Airbnbs with all the fixings. I always put my card down, wincing through my Aperol Spritz straw.

Until this session, I chalked it up to the reality of living in New York City. But Clayman clocked a detail on my intake form: I want to save for a family, and I’m already bracing myself for how drastically my social life will change once I have to prioritize a child. Will I feel a lot lonelier when I can’t join my friends for dinner?

It revealed an even deeper truth: I agree to everything because I don’t want to disappoint anyone. True to my people-pleasing ways, I even cave to every 25% tip request, no matter how absurd it feels.

Clayman, who faced a similar scenario when she was living in NYC in her 20s, said this is a great opportunity to “express some boundaries and even ask your friends to help you to be accountable to this goal.”

“We can think of this as kind of a preparation and rehearsal phase,” she said about my life before children. “You can start to run these simulations of what life might be like and give yourself some scaffolding.”

Advertisement

I’m overwhelmed by budget spreadsheets

After interviewing Clayman for a story on budgeting, I was inspired to start a budgeting spreadsheet. I asked my more fiscally responsible fiancé for advice on what he does, so we sat down and he walked me through a budgeting template he uses.

I still haven’t touched mine.

Having my finances split between my bank account, two credit card accounts, and back-and-forth Venmo payments made tallying up a month’s worth of expenses deeply convoluted. I also downloaded a budgeting app, but found that confusing, too.

I know this isn’t the only area of my life where I struggle to stay organized: I have ADHD and use an AI program to help me with household tasks. Clayman said she’s had many clients, particularly younger women, whose recent ADHD diagnoses helped them connect “some of the challenges that they’ve experienced when it comes to not just paying attention to money, but how to organize money as a whole.”

She suggested focusing on one area rather than doing a big overhaul all at once. I could start by tracking only what I spend on social outings before diving into everything else.

Advertisement

Loud budgeting still feels taboo

Going through my earliest memories around money, I realized that talking about saving wasn’t something I grew up with. My parents followed the typical immigrant story of coming to America with no money, but they didn’t talk much about saving when I was a kid. They did it quietly and wanted for me to focus on school and my career.

Socially, I rarely have friends say something is too pricey for them. We might briefly talk about salaries or money issues, but it still feels foreign to practice “loud budgeting,” or openly reject plans for the sake of saving.

Clayman said this is common. “It is a change in identity, in the way you have found your place in your relationships by being agreeable and easy in this particular way,” she said. But, she added, it can also be a great opportunity for both parties to grow.

“When you communicate a new intention and ask for support, it’s also creating a permission structure for that other person to change,” Clayman said.

It reminded me of a small step I took recently, where I joked with my friends that I always spend too much on days over 73 degrees and asked if we could go for a walk as our hangout. All three laughed and related, and we came over to a friend’s apartment that day, spending $0.

Advertisement

It’s made me think of other low-budget alternatives, such as hosting dinners at my place. That version of me might be more frazzled than the one sipping a chilled martini in a speakeasy. But it’s I suspect she’ll be a little more real — and possibly more fun.

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Finance

German finance minister wants to scrap spousal tax splitting

Published

on

German finance minister wants to scrap spousal tax splitting

Last weekend, several thousand people took to the streets in Munich to demonstrate against abortion and assisted suicide. One speaker made an extremely dramatic plea against what he called the “culture of death” that has allegedly taken hold in Germany. One sign of this, the speaker argued, was that the government is planning to abolish a regulation known as “spousal tax splitting.”

Is tax law really relevant to deep philosophical debates on the sanctity of life? It is even a matter of life and death at all? Surely we needn’t go that far? In any case, the intense political uproar surrounding the new debate on whether to abolish spousal tax splitting is notable, even by today’s standards of populist outrage.

An advantage for couples with widely divergent incomes

The row was sparked by Germany’s vice chancellor and finance minister, Lars Klingbeil, of the center-left Social Democratic Party (SPD), who said he wanted to abolish and replace the joint taxation of spouses’ income, a system that has been in place since 1958.

How exactly does spousal tax splitting work? In Germany, married couples (and since 2013, couples in civil partnerships), can choose to have their income assessed jointly by the tax authorities.

It means that the taxable income for both spouses together is halved – as if both partners had each earned an equal half of the income. Their tax liability is then determined by simply doubling the income tax due on one half.

Advertisement

As people who earn more pay higher taxes in Germany, this system benefits couples where one partner (and often this is still the man) earns significantly more than the other (in practice often the woman).

Lars Klingbeil
Lars Klingbeil thinks spousal splitting is outdated and costs the state too muchImage: Bernd von Jutrczenka/dpa/picture alliance

Costs of up to €25 billion per year

If for example one partner earns €60,000 ($70,512) a year and the other partner earns nothing, the couple will be taxed as if they earned €30,000 each. In this example, the couple would save nearly €5,800 in taxes per year compared to the amount they would owe if both partners filed their taxes separately. According to the Finance Ministry, spousal tax splitting costs the government a total of up to €25 billion annually.

Some critics have long viewed splitting as a tool to keep women out of the labor market, because the more a woman earns, the larger her tax burden becomes. Klingbeil seems to agree, arguing on ARD television in late March that the system was “out of step with the times.” The spousal splitting system reflects “a view of women and families that is completely at odds with my own,” he said.

Chancellor Merz said to be in favor of splitting

On Monday of this week, Klingbeil got some surprising support on this from Johannes Winkel, head of the youth wing of the conservative Christian Democratic Union (CDU).

“Given the demographic reality, the government should create incentives to ensure that both partners in a relationship are employed,” Winkel told the Funke Media Group. “In the future, tax relief should primarily be granted to married couples when they are facing hardships related to raising children.”

Advertisement

But the chancellor is a vocal skeptic of the proposal. “I am not convinced by the claim that joint filing for married couples discourages women from working,” Friedrich Merz said at a conference organized by the Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung newspaper. “Marriage is a relationship based on shared income and mutual support. And in a marriage, income must be treated as a joint income for tax purposes, not separately.”

Berlin under pressure to fix pensions, health care and taxes

To view this video please enable JavaScript, and consider upgrading to a web browser that supports HTML5 video

Klingbeil’s alternative plan

At around 74%, the labor force participation rate for women in Germany is one of the highest in Europe, but half of them work part-time.

Klingbeil’s idea is to replace the existing system with a more flexible approach: Both partners would be able to distribute tax-free income among themselves in such a way that it minimizes their tax liability. This would allow the couple to continue enjoying a tax advantage, albeit not to the same extent as before. And whether one partner earns more than the other would become less important.

However, it remains to be seen whether Klingbeil will be able to push through his proposal. Aside from Germany, similar regulations offering tax benefits to couples exist in Poland, Luxembourg, Portugal and France.

Advertisement

This article was originally written in German.

Continue Reading

Finance

Departing inspector general targets Council Office of Financial Analysis

Published

on

Departing inspector general targets Council Office of Financial Analysis

The $537,000-a-year office created in 2014 to advise the City Council on financial issues and avoid a repeat of the parking meter fiasco has failed to deliver on that mission, the city’s chief watchdog said Tuesday.

Days before concluding her four-year term, Inspector General Deborah Witzburg said a shortage of both adequate staff and financial information closely held by the mayor’s office prevents the Council’s Office of Financial Analysis from helping the Council be the the “co-equal branch of government” it aspires to be.

In a budget rebellion not seen since “Council Wars” in the 1980s, a majority of alderpersons led by conservative and moderate Democrats rejected Mayor Brandon Johnson’s corporate head tax and approved an alternative budget, including several revenue-generating items the mayor’s office adamantly opposed.

But Witzburg said the renegades would have been in an even better position to challenge Johnson if only their financial analysis office had been “equipped and positioned to do what it’s supposed to do” — provide the Council with “objective, independent financial analysis.”

“We are entering new territory where the City Council is asserting new, independent authority over the budget process. It can’t do that in a meaningful way without its own access to financial analysis,” Witzburg told the Chicago Sun-Times.

Advertisement

Chicago Inspector General Deborah Witzburg’s latest report focuses on the Chicago City Council’s Office of Financial Analysis.

Jim Vondruska/Jim Vondruska/For the Sun-Times

But the Council’s financial analysis office, she added, “has never been equipped or positioned to do what it needs to do. It needs better and more independent access to data, and it needs enough staff to do its job. It has a small number of employees and comparatively limited access to data.”

Advertisement

The inspector general’s farewell audit examined the period from 2015 through 2023. During that time, the financial analysis office budget authorized “either three or four” full-time employees. It now has a staff of five .

Witzburg is recommending a staffing analysis to identify how many people the financial office really needs — and also recommending that the office “get data directly” from other city departments, “ rather than having it go through the mayor’s office.”

The audit further recommends that the office develop “better procedures to meet their reporting requirements” in a timely manner. As it stands now, reports are delivered “sometimes late, sometimes not at all,” the inspector general said.

“We find that those reports have been both not timely and not complete in terms of what they are required to report on and that those reports therefore have provided limited assistance to the City Council in its responsibility to make decisions about the city’s budget,” she said.

The Council Office of Financial Analysis responded to the audit by saying it hopes to add at least three full-time staffers in the short term and has made “some progress” over the last three years in improving their access to data, but not enough.

Advertisement

The office was created in 2014 to provide Council members with expert advice on fiscal issues.

For nearly two years the reform was stuck in the mud over whether former 46th Ward Ald. Helen Shiller had the independence and policy expertise to lead the office.

Shiller ultimately withdrew her name, but the office was a bust nevertheless. In an attempt to breathe new life into it, sponsors pushed through a series of changes.

Instead of allowing the Budget chair alone to request a financial analysis on a proposal impacting the city budget, any alderperson was allowed to make that request.

The office was further required to produce activity reports quarterly, not just annually.

Advertisement

Now former-Budget Chair Pat Dowell (3rd) then chose Kenneth Williams Sr., a former analyst for the office, as director and gave him the “autonomy” the ordinance demanded.

Two years ago, a bizarre standoff developed in the office.

Budget Committee Chair Jason Ervin (28th) was empowered to dump Williams after Williams refused to leave to make way for a director of Ervin’s own choosing.

The standoff began when Williams said he was summoned to Ervin’s office and told the newly appointed Budget chair was “going in a different direction, and I’m putting you on administrative leave” with pay.

“He took all my credentials and access away. I would love to come to work. I wasn’t allowed to come to work,” Williams said then.

Advertisement

Williams collected a paycheck for doing nothing while serving out the final days remainder of a four-year term.

Ervin’s resolution stated the director “may be removed at any time with or without cause by a two-thirds” vote or 34 alderpersons. He chose Janice Oda-Gray, who remains chief administrator.

Continue Reading

Finance

Reilly Barnes Returns to Little League® as Purchasing/Finance Assistant

Published

on

Reilly Barnes Returns to Little League® as Purchasing/Finance Assistant

Little League® International has announced that Reilly Barnes accepted a new role as Purchasing/Finance Assistant, effective April 6, 2026. Barnes transitions from a temporary Purchasing Assistant to this full-time position to assist in the year-round demands of purchasing for the organization, as well as the region and Little League Baseball and Softball World Series tournaments. 

“We are thrilled to welcome back Reilly to our team as a full-time Purchasing/Finance Assistant. Reilly’s prior experience, time management, and attention to detail make him an invaluable asset to the purchasing team,” said Nancy Grove, Little League Materials Management Director. “We look forward to the positive contributions he will have on our organization.” 

In this role, Barnes will be responsible for processing purchase requisitions, coordinating souvenir products, and tracking order fulfillment. He will also assist with evaluating suppliers, reviewing product quality, and negotiating contracts for effective operations.  

After most recently working as a Logistician Analyst at Precision Air in Charleston, South Carolina, Barnes, a Williamsport native, returns after honing his skills in the fast-paced environment. Prior to his time at Precision Air, Barnes served as a Procurement Specialist at The Medical University of South Carolina, where his expertise and knowledge were instrumental in supporting both education and healthcare needs.  

“I am thrilled to return to Little League in this full-time role,” said Barnes. “Coming back to my hometown and having the opportunity to work for an organization that has played such a special part of my upbringing means a lot. I can’t wait begin this new opportunity.” 

Advertisement

Barnes graduated from the University of Pittsburgh in 2022 with a B.A. in Supply Chain Management, Finance, and Business Analytics.  

Continue Reading
Advertisement

Trending