Imagine you’re at the happiest place on earth: Disneyland. You see a family next to you, and something about them reminds you of home. THEY HAVE TO BE FROM UTAH! 

HERE ARE THE BEST WAYS TO TELL IF SOMEONE IS FROM UTAH!

They’re white:

Yeah… That’s a good start for the most part! Utah is a WHOPPING 88% white! Followed by 3% asian, 2% Native American and 1.5% Black.

They’re wearing a BYU shirt:

Let’s be honest here… If you’re not from Utah, you wouldn’t be caught DEAD in a BYU shirt or hat. Not a chance in hell!

Mom, Dad, and WAY TOO MANY KIDS:

Utah loves procreating! If you’re from Utah, you probably know someone with at least 8 siblings! You’ve got two parents in the park trying to keep up with 8 kids? Seems nearly impossible!

They’re blessing their Disneyland Churro or Corndog:

If you’ve walked past them, and they’re blessing for that corndog to nourish and strengthen their body, I’m willing to bet that family is from Utah!

Mom’s face:

The lips are fake and huge, the cheeks are fake and huge, the eye skin has been pulled back so far she looks like she just saw a ghost, and OTHER THINGS are very clearly huge and fake… There’s a great chance they’re from Utah. I mean, Utah has the SECOND MOST Plastic Surgeons per capita in the entire United States!

Those cringy matching Disneyland t-shirts:

I’m not talking about the shirts that everyone has mickey on them. I’m talking about the “JENSEN FAMILY DISNEYLAND TRIP 2023!” T-shirts… Everyone is sporting one, and they’ll never wear it again. What a waste of money!

In a perfect world, the Utah Jazz would move John Collins to the bench as the sixth or seventh guy, let him abuse the second-team defenders, and wrack up huge games off the bench. This is the perfect spot for the forward/center, as he would be able to impact the team offensively but would be protected defensively.

Right now, as the team’s starting center, Collins isn’t cutting it. He clearly doesn’t want to come off the bench and his fit with the Utah Jazz is not what anyone expected. Collins had the weirdest season for the Jazz in 2023-2024. On one hand, he defied critics. He became a reliable offensive weapon who did some real damage from all three levels of scoring. Yet, as a defensive player, he was often out of position, slow to rotate over, and was hardly the rim protector needed.

He is not a fit with the Utah Jazz, though he did prove himself to be a good player. The sad reality is that he’s just too expensive and is playing a role far bigger than what he should be playing. He’s the 2021-2022 Jordan Clarkson in a lot of ways. A very good player when on offense but not so much when the team moves to the defensive side of things.

So with the new rumor from Evan Sidery of Forbes Sports stating that the Jazz are in fact preparing to shop Collins around, we’re not mad about it. If he was a role player off the bench and made half the money he made, he’d be a critical piece for the Jazz’s future. However, he makes too much and demands far too big of a role to be successful with the Jazz.

He can find some success elsewhere in the NBA, on a team better suited to hide his flaws and utilize his strengths but the Jazz just aren’t that team.

Could Utah be on the move? Fresh off leaving the Pac-12 for the Big 12, Dick Weiss believes that Utah could be on the move yet again. It is a decision that might well usher in another round of conference expansion

Weiss is a legendary (and highly reputable) sports writer who has worked for the Philadelphia Daily News and the New York Daily News. He reported on Saturday night that Utah could be set to leave the Big 12 and join the ACC, marking the latest bit of news concerning conference realignment.

This, after Utah was approved to join the Big 12 last summer. The Utes officially become Big 12 members this August.

It is an intriguing and yet curious report. Were Utah to join a new conference as Weiss is reporting, they’d be moving conferences along with former Pac-12 members Cal and Stanford (and SMU is leaving the AAC), all of whom are ACC-bound this year. But why would Utah want to leave for the ACC?

Weiss says it is about the television presence of the ACC on ESPN. But the Big 12 has a contract with Fox and ESPN, arguably putting them in a better spot than the ACC. Conference expansion and realignment is being fueled by the acquisition of media markets.

If a program is in a prime media market (such as Maryland and Rutgers were for the Big Ten), then a Power Four conference will come calling.

Speculation is circulating about potential shifts in college sports conferences. There is discussion about Utah possibly moving to the ACC despite its recent move to the Big 12, with some suggesting the ACC might be a better fit due to its ESPN network agreement and potential for…

— Dick Weiss (@HoopsWeiss) May 26, 2024

And with their recent media rights deal, the Big 12 is set to surpass the ACC in terms of financial resources. So why would Utah leave a situation that makes geographic sense to join the ACC for potentially less money?

It may not make any sense. But if the ACC can make more money by adding Utah and help save their own conference then anything and everything will be on the table.

And since when has anything relating to conference expansion made any actual sense?