Donna Keys and Pat Stone cut their wedding cake

And the history behind it

Story and photo courtesy of Pat Stone

Pat Stone, one of the founders of PFLAG Dallas, and her longtime partner Donna Keys were married Saturday, May 4, at a small ceremony at their friends’ home in the Cedar Creek area, surrounded by family and friends. This week, Pat reflected on their wedding and the journey that led them to it:

“As I look at that photo of Donna Keys and myself about to cut our wedding cake, I see such a happy, contented couple, so excited to finally be able to expand their 10-year devoted relationship into a legal, devoted marriage.

“We had a lovely wedding ceremony on May 4, 2024, at the home of good friends in the Cedar Creek Lake area. It was a small gathering of 16. It was such an incredible afternoon of being surrounded by such love, support and fun.

“There I am at 81 and Donna at 68 — ready for more good years ahead together.

“Before I talk more about our relationship and explain what took us so long to marry, I would like to look back at why I am so comfortable talking about it all with Dallas Voice and Tammye Nash. Today I looked through my scrapbook of clippings and saw so many supportive articles from this newspaper regarding my early work in the LGBT community. I will mention only a few.

“I was only about 49 when the Dallas Voice covered my being one of the founders of Dallas PFLAG in 1992 (Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gays): ‘North Texas Parents Join Battle: parents of lesbians & gays through local PFLAG chapter advocate for an end to discrimination’ (8-14-92). I soon became president of the chapter and served a year on the national board.

“My time with PFLAG is a huge highlight of my life. I feel we made a difference; it is a warm legacy for me. And it soon became a cause larger than seeking rights for my lesbian daughter. I truly wanted to help other families accept their LGBT loved ones.

“The Dallas Voice was also there for me when I realized I was lesbian in 1996 at age 53: ‘PFLAG chief’s coming out sparks concern’ (11-15-1996). Yes, it did cause concerns from some in both the gay and straight community, as well as from my family and friends. My husband was devastated by the divorce that followed after 35 years of marriage.

“This was a sad and conflicted time for me. My daughter understood, but it was harder for my son who worked daily with his dad. We all got through these challenges in time.

“There was the Dallas Voice article ‘PFLAG chapter re-elects Stone’(11-22-96). The solution was for me to serve out my fifth year as co-president with a straight dad.

That worked fine. I had only planned to serve five years. I stepped down from the helpline and no longer greeted the new parents. Sad, but the early 1990s were sometimes challenging in this area.

“After leaving PFLAG. I started a support group Late Bloomers. And Dallas Voice was there: ‘Late Bloomers designed to help women coming out later in life’ (6-2-1997). This was such a fun and important group, and I led it for about 13 years.

“The Dallas Voice article ‘Awakening: Pat Stone to discuss new memoir at Resource Center on Wednesday May 1, 2009,’ referred to my new book at that time.

“So this leads to my living in the Cedar Creek Lake area, where in 2013, two good friends set me up with the love of my life, Donna Keys. She had lost her partner of 22 years to cancer about a year-and-a-half before and had recently retired as a Dallas County adult felony probation officer.

“Our first date was a little awkward since it was a blind date, but the very next day we connected beautifully at lunch at Chili’s in Gun Barrel City. In fact, I still can’t believe I shared with her a recent dream I’d had about a hug from a tall, broad-shouldered person. It was a special, ‘unconditional love’ type hug, but I could only see the person from the back and couldn’t tell if they were a man or a woman. I was confused, but I told Donna that after seeing her 6-foot frame and broad shoulders, I felt that person was her. I can’t believe I told her that; it could have scared her away. Thank goodness it didn’t!

“Within a few months Donna asked me to marry her. I said yes, and we made plans to marry in Boston since it was not yet legal in Texas. Then we learned that if we married I would lose the Social Security benefits that I received due to my ex-husband.

“We were disappointed but continued to enjoy our 10-year relationship that seemed like a marriage. We enjoyed movies, playing Yahtzee and just being together with our family that includes my dog, Misty, Donna’s little Yorkie Lily and our cat Lucy.

“Sadly, my ex-husband passed away last December. When I called the Social Security Administration to inform them of his passing, they told me I could now remarry and keep my benefits. It’s more than bittersweet that his passing meant Donna and I could now marry.

“This brings me back to that wonderful photo of Donna and me cutting that wedding cake. We are so grateful that we met and have already had 10 wonderful years together. We are hoping for at least 10 more, and we will forever treasure that photo and wedding ceremony.”