Trevor’s Costumes

The weather’s finally starting to cool down, right? I think we’re safe to acknowledge that it’s almost Halloween?

Oh shoot, it’s almost Halloween.

As ever a thing that’s become an annual tradition for the Argus Leader, if you’re in need of a last-minute South Dakota-themed costume that will generate whispers at the party of “What are they wearing?” and “I didn’t invite them, did you invite them?” then by all means, read on.

Ghostwriter

What you’ll need: A white sheet, a notebook, a pencil, some Wite-Out

Notes: Put on the sheet and start reporting out the facts about stuff like Gov. Kristi Noem’s meeting with Kim Jong-Un. Oh, sorry, what? That didn’t actually happen? Whoops. Good thing you brought the Wite-Out. Can you imagine how embarrassing it would have been if that made it into print?

Disappointed swimmer

What you’ll need: Swim trunks, goggles, maybe a pool noodle.

Notes: Dress up for a day at the pool — but just walk around the party looking extremely sad. Your reason? Votes on pricey renovations for pools at Frank Olson Park and Kuehn Park have been delayed twice already this year, to the chagrin of several Sioux Falls councilors.

Someone trying to enjoy a summer day in southeastern South Dakota

What you’ll need: A big coat, some bug spray. Maybe a hazmat suit if you own one of those for some reason.

Notes: Remember how much of a nightmare it was to go outside when mosquitos were rampant in July across the parts of South Dakota? Wrap yourself up and bring along some bug spray to remind everyone of that two weeks where venturing out to get the mail could lose you about a pint of blood.

Lallycooler

What you’ll need: Nothing. Or anything?

Notes: OK, sure. The official word on the odd name of Sioux Falls’ upcoming music festival is that it means “a real success.” But I’m going to bet that you can pretty much wander into any Halloween party wearing like, some tissue paper and pipe cleaners and tell people you’re dressed up as a Lallycooler and someone will believe you.

Ostrich

What you’ll need: Some feathers, or maybe just a nice turtleneck.

Notes: Okay, this one is pretty niche, and you might need to remind people that an ostrich was running around Louise Avenue for a bit earlier this year. This will probably play better if you’re friends with any of the people in that video who are way, way too comfortable approaching a 7-foot-tall bird that has knives on its feet.

Someone parking their way-too-big truck on Phillips Avenue

What you’ll need: A big piece of cardboard or something, some sunglasses and a baseball cap.

Notes: Just wander around the party, making sure that as often as possible you’re using the cardboard to prevent people from getting through hallways or entering doors. Get to work on this one, because it could land you a ticket any day now.

Literally anything about the election

What you’ll need: Your imagination.

Notes: It’s already been an absurd election year, so just decide what you think the latest scandal or big news story will be between now and Nov. 5 and just dress up as that − as long as you promise to also go vote.