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L.A. Affairs: My fling's words took me by surprise. ‘I’m not committed to you’

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L.A. Affairs: My fling's words took me by surprise. ‘I’m not committed to you’

It was a beautiful February day in Los Angeles after the fires. The sun burned hot overhead. I pulled my Ducati motorcycle into a spot outside his restaurant in the Arts District. I was hot, thirsty, hungry — three simple needs that instantly faded when I saw him.

Michael.

Even with my darkened helmet shield, our eyes locked. He was wheeling produce up the ramp to the kitchen, his movements as familiar to me as my own breath.

For a moment, time slowed. The weight of unspoken words, of unresolved heartbreak, of unanswered questions hung between us. I had spent two months trying to make sense of the silence he left me in. The last time we spoke, he had dropped a bomb on me late on a Friday night, a few days before Christmas, in the casual way only he could.

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“I’m not committed to you,” he said. Just like that, a simple sentence out of the blue that blindsided me.

And then, the knife twisted.

“I really like this woman in San Diego. I’m seeing her at Christmas.”

I could still hear the words, feel the numbness settle in, like a short circuit in my brain.

Hadn’t we just spent a perfect weekend in L.A.? Having dinner at Bavel, watching Liverpool play, the quiet intimacy of me reading while he walked his dogs. Hadn’t we just gone to the Bread Lounge for my favorite pastry, taken his vintage BMW for a ride, shared a moment that felt uniquely ours?

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And what about the sweetness of those two days in Orange County: dinner, the Christmas play in Laguna, the laughter in the photo booth at A Restaurant, just like our first date 18 months prior, giggling and capturing our undeniable joy in snapshots?

The memories flooded in as I sat on my Ducati, wondering why he was here, why his restaurant, which he was selling, hadn’t yet closed escrow and why this pain still gripped me. Why had he gone dead silent after treating me so carelessly? His last text on Dec. 31 saying he was OK, he needed time, he’d been sick, but would be in touch felt like an echo in an empty canyon. I gave him time. But what I got in return was nothing.

And nothing is a kind of cruelty all its own.

Michael’s voice jolted me.

“Rainie, I’m late! I don’t have time to talk to you.”

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I motioned him over. The heat pressed against my face as I pulled off my helmet and then my leather jacket. I met his gaze and asked the question that had burned inside me for weeks since the last time we spoke in December and his last text on Dec. 31.

“Why did you ghost me? Ghosting was what you do to strangers — to people who don’t matter.”

Had I really meant so little to him?

He had no real answer, just a feeble, “I thought it was better this way for you.” He agreed we could make a plan to talk “later,” sometime after the restaurant closed escrow, which was still up in the air. Then he told me to make myself at home in the restaurant and he told his staff to take care of me. Then he was gone.

I should have left too. But I stayed.

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Sitting at the bar, I found myself in conversation with a stranger. Another Ducati rider.

Tim.

Three seats down, he had chimed in when the bartender asked about my bike. Within minutes, we were deep in conversation, drawn together by something simple, something easy.

I glanced at my watch — 3:09 p.m. What! How did it get so late? I had to get up to Mt. Wilson before it got dark and cold. I handed Tim my card and left, expecting nothing.

That night, he texted. Then he called.

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For three hours, I was laughing — genuinely laughing for the first time in months.

Two days later, Tim and I met for a relaxed dinner at the Farmhouse in Roger’s Gardens. Afterward, when he kissed me, it wasn’t just lips meeting — it was a balm, a quiet reassurance that I was still here, still capable of connection, still alive.

The next morning, he skipped out on his conference and brought me breakfast in bed. We decided to ride together. But first, a stop at the motorcycle shop and then a half-hour appointment at my oncologist’s office. When I stepped out, there he was — on his Ducati, next to mine, waiting.

We rode the coastline, winding through Laguna Canyon, El Toro Road, Santiago Canyon, stopping at Cook’s Corner for burgers. The conversation flowed as effortlessly as the miles beneath our tires. His laughter felt like sunlight filtering through a dense forest, reaching places in me that had been dark for too long.

Tim had raced Ducatis. He was an expert. And yet, when he looked at me, he said something unexpected.

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“You’re a good rider and your form is perfect. You ride better than any of my friends.”

The words hit differently than any compliment I had received in a long time. Somewhere in Michael’s silence, in his rejection, in the weeks of self-doubt, I had started to believe I wasn’t enough.

That night, lying alone in my bed, I felt something shift.

Michael, who had once occupied every thought, every breath, who still hadn’t reached out to talk with me, suddenly seemed … distant. Less important. The weight of his absence felt lighter.

Not because Tim had replaced him. But because Tim had reminded me of something I had forgotten: myself.

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Michael’s silence had stolen pieces of my confidence, had made me question my worth. But an afternoon of laughter, of conversation, of reaching speeds over 100 mph on my Ducati with someone who seemed to value me and didn’t make me doubt myself — it brought my confidence front and center.

I may never see Tim again. But I will always be grateful for what he unknowingly gave me: the realization that I am whole. That I am enough. That I don’t need Michael’s love, or his silence, to define me.

The next morning, I slept in, letting the experience settle, letting myself feel it.

Then I threw on my jacket, grabbed my helmet, and walked out to my Ducati.

I was bursting with joy and ready to go. I was finally moving forward.

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The author is a personal assistant in Orange County. She lives in the Newport Beach area. She’s on Instagram: @rainienb

L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.

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Doctors says ‘The Pitt’ reflects the gritty realities of medicine today

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Doctors says ‘The Pitt’ reflects the gritty realities of medicine today

From left: Noah Wyle plays Dr. Michael “Robby” Robinavitch, the senior attending physician, and Fiona Dourif plays Dr. Cassie McKay, a third-year resident, in a fictional Pittsburgh emergency department in the HBO Max series The Pitt.

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The first five minutes of the new season of The Pitt instantly capture the state of medicine in the mid-2020s: a hectic emergency department waiting room; a sign warning that aggressive behavior will not be tolerated; a memorial plaque for victims of a mass shooting; and a patient with large Ziploc bags filled to the brink with various supplements and homeopathic remedies.

Scenes from the new installment feel almost too recognizable to many doctors.

The return of the critically acclaimed medical drama streaming on HBO Max offers viewers a surprisingly realistic view of how doctors practice medicine in an age of political division, institutional mistrust and the corporatization of health care.

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Each season covers one day in the kinetic, understaffed emergency department of a fictional Pittsburgh hospital, with each episode spanning a single hour of a 15-hour shift. That means there’s no time for romantic plots or far-fetched storylines that typically dominate medical dramas.

Instead, the fast-paced show takes viewers into the real world of the ER, complete with a firehose of medical jargon and the day-to-day struggles of those on the frontlines of the American health care system. It’s a microcosm of medicine — and of a fragmented United States.

Many doctors and health professionals praised season one of the series, and ER docs even invited the show’s star Noah Wyle to their annual conference in September.

So what do doctors think of the new season? As a medical student myself, I appreciated the dig at the “July effect” — the long-held belief that the quality of care decreases in July when newbie doctors start residency — rebranded “first week in July syndrome” by one of the characters.

That insider wink sets the tone for a season that Dr. Alok Patel, a pediatrician at Stanford Medicine Children’s Health, says is on point. Patel, who co-hosts the show’s companion podcast, watched the first nine episodes of the new installment and spoke to NPR about his first impressions.

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To me, as a medical student, the first few scenes of the new season are pretty striking, and they resemble what modern-day emergency medicine looks and sounds like. From your point of view, how accurate is it?

I’ll say off the bat, when it comes to capturing the full essence of practicing health care — the highs, the lows and the frustrations — The Pitt is by far the most medically accurate show that I think has ever been created. And I’m not the only one to share that opinion. I hear that a lot from my colleagues.

OK, but is every shift really that chaotic?

I mean, obviously, it’s television. And I know a lot of ER doctors who watch the show and are like, “Hey, it’s really good, but not every shift is that crazy.” I’m like, “Come on, relax. It’s TV. You’ve got to take a little bit of liberties.”

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As in its last season, The Pitt sheds light on the real — sometimes boring — bureaucratic burdens doctors deal with that often get in the way of good medicine. How does that resonate with real doctors?

There are so many topics that affect patient care that are not glorified. And so The Pitt did this really artful job of inserting these topics with the right characters and the right relatable scenarios. I don’t want to give anything away, but there’s a pretty relatable issue in season two with medical bills.

Right. Insurance seems to take center stage at times this season — almost as a character itself — which seems apt for this moment when many Americans are facing a sharp rise in costs. But these mundane — yet heartbreaking — moments don’t usually make their way into medical dramas, right?

I guarantee when people see this, they’re going to nod their head because they know someone who has been affected by a huge hospital bill.

If you’re going to tell a story about an emergency department that is being led by these compassionate health care workers doing everything they can for patients, you’ve got to make sure you insert all of health care into it.

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As the characters juggle multiple patients each hour, a familiar motif returns: medical providers grappling with some heavy burdens outside of work.

Yeah, the reality is that if you’re working a busy shift and you have things happening in your personal life, the line between personal life and professional life gets blurred and people have moments.

The Pitt highlights that and it shows that doctors are real people. Nurses are actual human beings. And sometimes things happen, and it spills out into the workplace. It’s time we take a step back and not only recognize it, but also appreciate what people are dealing with.

2025 was another tough year for doctors. Many had to continue to battle misinformation while simultaneously practicing medicine. How does medical misinformation fit into season two?

I wouldn’t say it’s just mistrust of medicine. I mean that theme definitely shows up in The Pitt, but people are also just confused. They don’t know where to get their information from. They don’t know who to trust. They don’t know what the right decision is.

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There’s one specific scene in season two that, again, no spoilers here, but involves somebody getting their information from social media. And that again is a very real theme.

In recent years, physical and verbal abuse of healthcare workers has risen, fueling mental health struggles among providers. The Pitt was praised for diving into this reality. Does it return this season?

The new season of The Pitt still has some of that tension between patients and health care professionals — and sometimes it’s completely projected or misdirected. People are frustrated, they get pissed off when they can’t see a doctor in time and they may act out.

The characters who get physically attacked in The Pitt just brush it off. That whole concept of having to suppress this aggression and then the frustration that there’s not enough protection for health care workers, that’s a very real issue.

A new attending physician, Dr. Baran Al-Hashimi, joins the cast this season. Sepideh Moafi plays her, and she works closely with the veteran attending physician, Dr. Michael “Robby” Robinavitch, played by Noah Wyle. What are your — and Robby’s — first impressions of her?

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Right off the bat in the first episode, people get to meet this brilliant firecracker. Dr. Al-Hashimi, versus Dr. Robby, almost represents two generations of attending physicians. They’re almost on two sides of this coin, and there’s a little bit of clashing.

Sepideh Moafi, fourth from left, as Dr. Baran Al-Hashimi, the new attending physician, huddles with her team around a patient in a fictional Pittsburgh teaching hospital in the HBO Max series The Pitt.

Sepideh Moafi, fourth from left, as Dr. Baran Al-Hashimi, the new attending physician, huddles with her team around a patient in a fictional Pittsburgh teaching hospital in the HBO Max series The Pitt.

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Part of that clash is her clear-eyed take on artificial intelligence and its role in medicine. And she thinks AI can help doctors document what’s happening with patients — also called charting — right?

Yep, Dr. Al-Hashimi is an advocate for AI tools in the ER because, I swear to God, they make health care workers’ lives more efficient. They make things such as charting faster, which is a theme that shows up in season two.

But then Dr. Robby gives a very interesting rebuttal to the widespread use of AI. The worry is that if we put AI tools everywhere, then all of a sudden, the financial arm of health care would say, “Cool, now you can double how many patients you see. We will not give you any more resources, but with these AI tools, you can generate more money for the system.”

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The new installment also continues to touch on the growing corporatization of medicine. In season one we saw how Dr. Robby and his staff were being pushed to see more patients.

Yes, it really helps the audience understand the kind of stressors that people are dealing with while they’re just trying to take care of patients.

In the first season, when Dr. Robby kind of had that back and forth with the hospital administrator, doctors were immediately won over because that is such a big point of frustration — such a massive barrier.

There are so many more themes explored this season. What else should viewers look forward to?

I’m really excited for viewers to dive into the character development. It’s so reflective of how it really goes in residency. So much happens between your first year and second year of residency — not only in terms of your medical skill, but also in terms of your development as a person.

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I think what’s also really fascinating is that The Pitt has life lessons buried in every episode. Sometimes you catch it immediately, sometimes it’s at the end, sometimes you catch it when you watch it again.

But it represents so much of humanity because humanity doesn’t get put on hold when you get sick — you just go to the hospital with your full self. And so every episode — every patient scenario — there is a lesson to learn.

Michal Ruprecht is a Stanford Global Health Media Fellow and a fourth-year medical student.

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In Beauty, Private Equity Is Hot Again

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In Beauty, Private Equity Is Hot Again
As strategic firms slow down their shopping sprees and venture capital dollars dry up, PE firms’ reputation for asset stripping is a thing of the past. Founders are now often hoping for private equity buyouts, but want to be sure there can be a true partnership.
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10 books we’re looking forward to in early 2026

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10 books we’re looking forward to in early 2026

Two fiction books about good friends coming from different circumstances. Two biographies of people whose influence on American culture is, arguably, still underrated. One Liza Minnelli memoir. These are just a handful of books coming out in the first few months of 2026 that we’ve got our eye on.

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Autobiography of Cotton, by Cristina Rivera Garza

Autobiography of Cotton, by Cristina Rivera Garza, Feb. 3

Garza, who won a Pulitzer in 2024 for memoir/autobiography, actually first published Autobiography of Cotton back in 2020, but it’s only now getting an English translation. The book blends fiction with the author’s own familial history to tell the story of cotton cultivation along the U.S.-Mexico border.

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Crux, by Gabriel Tallent

Crux, by Gabriel Tallent, Jan. 20

Tallent’s last novel, My Absolute Darling, was a harrowing coming of age story about a teenage girl surviving her abusive survivalist father. But it did find pockets of beauty in the outdoors. Tallent’s follow up looks to be similarly awestruck by nature. It’s about two young friends, separated by class and opportunity, but bound together by a love of rock climbing.

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Half His Age, by Jennette McCurdy

Half His Age, by Jennette McCurdy, Jan. 20

The former iCarly actress’ bracing and brutally honest memoir, I’m Glad My Mom Died, was a huge hit. It spent weeks on bestseller’s lists, and is being adapted into a series for Apple TV+. Now McCurdy’s set to come out with her fiction debut, about a teenage girl who falls for her high school creative writing teacher.

Kin, by Tayari Jones

Kin, by Tayari Jones, Feb. 24

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Similarly to Crux, Kin also follows two friends across the years as options and opportunities pull them apart. The friends at the center of this book are two women who grew up without moms. Jones’ last novel, 2018’s An American Marriage, was a huge hit with critics.

Seasons of Glass & Iron, by Amal El-Mohtar

Seasons of Glass & Iron: Stories, by Amal El-Mohtar, March 24

El-Mohtar is an acclaimed science-fiction writer, and this book is a collection of previously published short stories and poetry. Many of the works here have been honored by the big science-fiction/fantasy awards, including the titular story, which is a feminist re-telling of two fairy tales.

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Nonfiction

A Hymn to Life: Shame Has to Change Sides, by Gisèle Pelicot

A Hymn to Life: Shame Has to Change Sides, by Gisèle Pelicot, Feb. 17

Pelicot’s story of rape and sexual assault – and her decision to wave anonymity in the trial – turned her into a galvanizing figure for women across the world. Her writing her own story of everything that happened is also a call to action for others to do the same.

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Cosmic Music: The Life, Art, and Transcendence of Alice Coltrane, by Andy Beta

Cosmic Music: The Life, Art, and Transcendence of Alice Coltrane, by Andy Beta, March 3

For decades, the life and work of Alice Coltrane has lived in the shadow of her husband, John Coltrane. This deeply researched biography hopes to properly contextualize her as one of the most visionary and influential musicians of her time.

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Football, by Chuck Klosterman

Football, by Chuck Klosterman, Jan. 20

One of our great essaysists and (over?) thinkers turns his sights onto one of the last bits of monoculture we’ve got. But in one of the pieces in this collection, Klosterman wonders, how long until football is no longer the summation of American culture? But until that time comes, there’s plenty to dig into from gambling to debates over the true goat.

Kids, Wait Till You Hear This! by Liza Minnelli

Kids, Wait Till You Hear This! by Liza Minnelli, with Michael Feinstein, March 20

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Minnelli told People that previous attempts at telling her story “didn’t get it right,” so she’s doing it herself. This new memoir promises to get into her childhood, her marriages, and her struggles with substance abuse.

Tom Paine’s War: The Words that Rallied a Nation and the Founder of Our Time, by Jack Kelly

Tom Paine’s War: The Words that Rallied a Nation and the Founder of Our Time, by Jack Kelly, Jan. 6

If you haven’t heard, it’s a big birthday year for America. And it’s a birthday that might not have happened if not for the words of Thomas Paine. This new book from historian Jack Kelly makes the argument that Paine’s words are just as important and relevant to us today.

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