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Advice | Ask Amy: Retired priest struggles with Catholic critique

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Advice | Ask Amy: Retired priest struggles with Catholic critique


Dear Amy: I am a retired Catholic priest. For the most part, I have enjoyed these late-life years, especially as the pace of life has eased up. However, one difficulty I’ve encountered stems from my years in active ministry.

During one of my assignments, I got to know a number of families associated with my ministry. I have remained in contact with several of these families and have been invited to celebrate baptisms, marriages, and funerals. In recent years, two couples have invited me on a regular basis to have dinner with them. While I initially enjoyed these, a problem has emerged that involves one couple in particular.

This couple decided to stop attending church services. I felt this was their decision to make and have never criticized or judged them for it. However, invariably during our evenings together they steer the conversation to their gripes about the Catholic Church. I’ve gone so far as to meet privately with them, letting them know how uncomfortable I am with their behavior during something I consider an informal gathering of friends. All to no avail. I usually end up leaving these dinners feeling angry and depressed.

These folks have been great friends for many years, but I’m at my wits end trying to figure out how best to deal with the situation. Should I just give up and decline future invitations?

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Father Confused: I can only imagine the pressure you might feel to always respond to uncomfortable situations in a way that basically protects others. Because you have retired from the formal part of ministry, it might not be necessary for you to be so discreet about your concerns when something bothers you. My point is that although you will always be a priest, you absolutely have the human right to react publicly to topics, behavior or comments that bother or offend you.

If this happens again at a social occasion, you can say a version of, “Naturally, this is a very difficult topic for me, but I realize that my presence seems to trigger a discussion about the failings of the institution I’ve devoted my life to. I’ve mentioned this privately but I understand now that bringing it up is just too tempting to avoid, so I’ll take this as my cue to say good night.” This is also an issue you might raise with your own pastoral counselor.

Dear Amy: Last year, I witnessed a tragic hit-and-run incident involving a car and a pedestrian. The pedestrian did not survive, and the incident deeply affected me. After learning the victim’s name through local press coverage, I engaged in a brief email exchange with the organizer of an online fundraiser for the person’s survivors. I’ve never met the deceased, but I’ve been seeking a deeper sense of closure and feel that paying my respects at their resting place would be meaningful. Unfortunately, I haven’t been able to locate this information.

Considering the sensitivity of the matter and my limited connection to the victim, I wonder if it would be appropriate for me, a stranger, to ask the friend of the deceased who organized the fundraiser about the burial location. I am committed to approaching this with utmost respect for the feelings and privacy of those close to the victim. What is your advice?

Mourning: I can imagine the deep sadness and lingering confusion you might feel after witnessing this crime. I also appreciate your concern and your stated desire to be sensitive toward the survivors. As someone who has experienced the sudden, violent and traumatic loss of a family member, I would vote “no” on any stranger seeking out the gravesite, even someone with your compassionate and respectful intent.

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However, there is no universal response to loss, and this victim’s family might feel and respond differently. Reach out to the person who organized the fundraiser, and prepare yourself to accept whatever answer comes your way. I strongly urge you to see a counselor specializing in trauma in order to continue to process the longer-term effect of witnessing this terrible event.

Dear Amy:Looking” was frustrated by dating apps. I found it interesting that you didn’t suggest seeking the help of a matchmaker. I am in the process of getting certified; professional human matchmakers can help people the apps leave behind. I’ve been happily married to my loving husband for almost 31 years. We met in a karaoke bar. Ha!

Love Love: This would make a great Broadway musical.

© 2024 by Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency.



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Washington Spirit and Star Defender Tara Rudd Agree to New Contract

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Washington Spirit and Star Defender Tara Rudd Agree to New Contract


2025 NWSL Defender of the Year signs three-year deal with 2029 and 2030 club options

Washington, D.C. (02/17/2026) – The Washington Spirit and star defender Tara Rudd (née McKeown) have agreed to a new contract, the club announced today. Rudd’s new deal will go through the 2028 season, carry 2029 and 2030 club options, and include a signing bonus.

“I’m beyond excited to continue my journey with the Washington Spirit,” said Rudd. “This organization has believed in me from day one and I’m proud to represent this community and keep pushing to raise the standard and compete for championships with my teammates. D.C. has become my home and there’s no place I’d rather be. I cannot wait to continue to build on what we’ve started here and give our amazing fans a lot more to cheer for over the coming years.”

One of Washington’s most consistent players across the past three seasons, Rudd continues to be a leader with the Spirit. Following up her Iron Woman season in 2024, the fifth-year player earned her first call-ups to the U.S. Women’s National Team (USWNT) and took home the NWSL’s Defender of the Year award in 2025. Rudd ranked in the top two among all defenders in the NWSL in interceptions in 2025 with 50 as well as top four in both blocked shots and tackle success among defenders with a minimum of 1,000 minutes.

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“Tara Rudd is a Washington Spirit cornerstone,” said President of Soccer Operations Haley Carter. “The 2025 NWSL Defender of the Year and a consistent USWNT presence, she is central to everything we are building here. Her growth into one of the premier defenders in this league speaks to what she puts in every single day, and we’re proud that our environment and support system have been part of that journey. We are thrilled that Tara shares our vision for what this club can achieve, and we cannot wait to see what the next chapter looks like together.”

At the international level, Rudd has been a mainstay of the USWNT roster since earning her first call-up to the senior team following the 2024 NWSL season. The defender has appeared in ten matches for the side so far and even dished out three assists from the back line.

Originally from Newbury Park, California, Rudd attended the University of Southern California before being drafted by the Spirit with the eighth overall pick in 2021. In four seasons with the Trojans, Rudd tallied 33 goals and 28 assists in 76 appearances, earning First Team All-American honors once and First Team All-Pac-12 honors twice in the process. Rudd also earned a Pac-12 All-Freshman Team nod in 2017 and an All-Pac-12 Third Team nod in 2018.

The Spirit season kicks off in March with Spirit Fest, the team’s annual free fan event on March 8 at 2 p.m. at The Anthem in DC. Tickets are available HERE. Then on March 13 at 8 p.m., the Spirit begins its quest for a third consecutive NWSL Championship appearance when it faces Portland Thorns FC in the team’s 2026 home opener at Audi Field. Tickets are available HERE.

About The Washington Spirit

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The Washington Spirit is the premier professional women’s soccer team based in Washington, D.C. and plays at Audi Field in Buzzard Point. The Spirit was founded on November 21, 2012 and is an inaugural member of the National Women’s Soccer League (NWSL) the fastest growing sports league in the US. The club is home to some of the best players in the world who have won championships for both club and country. For more information about the Spirit, visit WashingtonSpirit.com and follow the club on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.





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Trump administration ordered to restore George Washington slavery exhibit it removed in Philadelphia

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Trump administration ordered to restore George Washington slavery exhibit it removed in Philadelphia


FILE – A person views posted signs on the locations of the now removed explanatory panels that were part of an exhibit on slavery at President’s House Site in Philadelphia, Jan. 23, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke, file)

An exhibit about nine people enslaved by George Washington must be restored at his former home in Philadelphia after President Donald Trump’s administration took it down last month, a federal judge ruled on Presidents Day, the federal holiday honoring Washington’s legacy.

The city of Philadelphia sued in January after the National Park Service removed the explanatory panels from Independence National Historical Park, the site where George and Martha Washington lived with nine of their slaves in the 1790s, when Philadelphia was briefly the nation’s capital.

The removal came in response to a Trump executive order “restoring truth and sanity to American history” at the nation’s museums, parks and landmarks. It directed the Interior Department to ensure those sites do not display elements that “inappropriately disparage Americans past or living.”

U.S. District Judge Cynthia Rufe ruled Monday that all materials must be restored in their original condition while a lawsuit challenging the removal’s legality plays out. She prohibited Trump officials from installing replacements that explain the history differently.

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People walk past an informational panel at President’s House Site Tuesday, Aug. 19, 2025, in Philadelphia. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke, File)
A person films the location of a now removed explanatory panels that were part of an exhibit on slavery at President’s House Site in Philadelphia, Friday, Jan. 23, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Rufe, an appointee of Republican President George W. Bush, began her written order with a quote from George Orwell’s dystopian novel “1984” and compared the Trump administration to the book’s totalitarian regime called the Ministry of Truth, which revised historical records to align with its own narrative.

“As if the Ministry of Truth in George Orwell’s 1984 now existed, with its motto ‘Ignorance is Strength,’ this Court is now asked to determine whether the federal government has the power it claims — to dissemble and disassemble historical truths when it has some domain over historical facts,” Rufe wrote. “It does not.”

She had warned Justice Department lawyers during a January hearing that they were making “dangerous” and “horrifying” statements when they said Trump officials can choose which parts of U.S. history to display at National Park Service sites.

The Interior Department did not immediately respond to a request for comment on the ruling, which came while government offices were closed for the federal holiday.

The judge did not provide a timeline for when the exhibit must be restored. Federal officials can appeal the ruling.

The historical site is among several where the administration has quietly removed content about the history of enslaved people, LGBTQ+ people and Native Americans.

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Signage that has disappeared from Grand Canyon National Park said settlers pushed Native American tribes “off their land” for the park to be established and “exploited” the landscape for mining and grazing.

Last week, a rainbow flag was taken down at the Stonewall National Monument, where bar patrons rebelled against a police raid and catalyzed the modern LGBTQ+ rights movement. The administration has also removed references to transgender people from its webpage about the monument, despite several trans women of color being key figures in the uprising.

The Philadelphia exhibit, created two decades ago in a partnership between the city and federal officials, included biographical details about each of the nine people enslaved by the Washingtons at the home, including two who escaped.

Demonstrators gather to protest removal of explanatory panels that were part of an exhibit on slavery at the President’s House Site in Philadelphia, Tuesday, Feb. 10, 2026. (AP Photo/Matt Rourke)

Among them was Oney Judge, who was born into slavery at the family’s plantation in Mount Vernon, Virginia, and later escaped from their Philadelphia house in 1796. Judge fled north to New Hampshire, a free state, while Washington had her declared a fugitive and published advertisements seeking her return.

Because Judge had escaped from the Philadelphia house, the park service in 2022 supported the site’s inclusion in a national network of Underground Railroad sites where they would teach about abolitionists and escaped slaves. Rufe noted that materials about Judge were among those removed, which she said “conceals crucial information linking the site to the Network to Freedom.”

Only the names of Judge and the other eight enslaved people — Austin, Paris, Hercules, Richmond, Giles, Moll and Joe, who each had a single name, and Christopher Sheels — remained engraved in a cement wall after park service employees took a crowbar to the plaques on Jan. 22.

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Hercules also escaped in 1797 after he was brought to Mount Vernon, where the Washingtons had many other slaves. He reached New York City despite being declared a fugitive slave and lived under the name Hercules Posey.

Several local politicians and Black community leaders celebrated the ruling, which came while many were out rallying at the site for its restoration.

State Rep. Malcolm Kenyatta, a Philadelphia Democrat, said the community prevailed against an attempt by the Trump administration to “whitewash our history.”

“Philadelphians fought back, and I could not be more proud of how we stood together,” he said.





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1 dead, 2 injured in head-on collision near Sequim

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1 dead, 2 injured in head-on collision near Sequim


A man is dead, and two others were injured after two vehicles collided near Sequim late Sunday night, according to the Washington State Patrol (WSP).

An SUV with two people was heading west on SR 101 at around 7:15 p.m. when a pickup truck in the opposite direction crossed the center line and crashed head-on.

The SUV passenger, a 39-year-old Lynnwood man, was declared dead by authorities at the scene. A 34-year-old woman driving the vehicle was airlifted to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle, and her condition is unknown.

WSP said drugs or alcohol played a part in the collision. The Colorado man is facing charges of vehicular homicide and vehicular assault.

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The Colorado man was not wearing a seatbelt at the time of the crash and was lifeflighted to Providence Regional Medical Center in Everett. WSP has not released his condition.

This is a developing story. Check back for updates.



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