San Diego, CA

Embracing Living & Grieving – San Diego Jewish World

Published

2 years ago

April 30, 2024

Press Room

Embracing Living & Grieving – San Diego Jewish World

By Shayna Kaufmann

Shayna Kaufmann

SAN DIEGO — Living and grieving co-exist. I was reminded of this yet again, in a palpable way, while on a recent trip to Scotland. I was visiting my daughter, Maya, who is studying in Glasgow for the semester. It was the second morning of my trip. I awoke to a string of frantic WhatsApp texts, from friends in my women’s group, about Angela, one of our intimate group of 10. The most recent text, written hours before, said, “She’s gone.” It was followed by a slew of broken hearted emojis.

I could not breathe much less wrap my head around those shocking words. I just saw her in the hospital, only days before I left San Diego. We knew her cancer prognosis was serious but none of us thought that death was at her door. I looked at my daughter, asleep next to me in my hotel bed, took my phone into the bathroom to track what happened, and sobbed.

Exactly one week before, the night before her scheduled surgery, I went with several other women in our group to visit Angela in the hospital. She was dressed in regular clothes, walking around, and looking as alive and beautiful as always. We talked about the surgery and how we could support her in her recovery. The seven of us seemed more worried and tense than Angela.

Then, we made a huddle with Angela, wrapped our arms around each other, and sang a melodic healing prayer. At one point, I glanced up at Angela, and saw her intently listening, with an angelic smile on her face. Though she knew (we did not) that her cancer had metastasized, there was not a hint of fear or sorrow on her face. She appeared to be fully taking in every second of her life. When the prayer was over, we stayed in our huddle and silently swayed. None of us wanted to let go.

When I read the shocking news, I briefly thought about returning home to go to her funeral. I was double crushed to miss it. But Maya, Tara (my oldest who was soon joining us), and I would have also been crushed if I left. My compromise, supported by my daughters, was to return to San Diego a few days early, in order to attend the last night of Shiva (a Jewish memorial gathering in the days following one’s burial.)

Despite Angela’s passing, my week in Scotland was wonderful. The varied scenery and topography were breathtaking. I treasured the time with my young adult daughters, perhaps even more than usual, as Angela’s death drilled into me the preciousness and unpredictability of time. We laughed, shared “adult” stories, ate, drank, had deep conversations, and gasped together as I nervously navigated roundabouts and single-lane, two-way roads, while driving on the left-hand side of the road. An unexpected highlight, was our giddy time eating and talking in the car, while waiting hours for help to change a pot-hole demolished tire. None of us got upset or complained. It was what it was.

And, I often cried when I thought about Angela. On one particular drive, in the awe-inspiring Isle of Sky, Maya, our navigator and DJ, played some soulful Celtic music. The combined sounds and sights unleashed a barrage of tears. My daughters were old enough to understand that I needed to cry, and held space for me to let them roll. As I cried, I breathed in the spacious air and looked at the billowy clouds in a rare sunny sky. I was living and grieving.

Grief is part of life. It is inevitable. If we are grieving, we are living, though it can be easy to get lost in a cloud of detached grief. Amidst my sorrow over Angela, I felt even more grateful for my life, my fortunate opportunities, and my treasured time with Tara and Maya. Angela did the same in the waning days of her life. I watched her joking around with her kids in the hospital, all the while knowing her remaining time on earth would be brief.

May you all remember to create space to live as you navigate life’s inevitable losses. There is room for both.

*
Dr. Shayna Kaufmann, a psychologist, received her mindfulness teacher training through Dharma Moon and Tibet House US. She leads meditation workshops and retreats and teaches mindfulness individually.

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San Diego, CA

The Best Things to Do in San Diego: May 2026 | San Diego Magazine

Published

4 hours ago

April 20, 2026

Press Room

The Best Things to Do in San Diego: May 2026 | San Diego Magazine

When we think of May, we think of Mother’s Day, blooming flowers, sunny skies, and lots of fun, seasonal events in the city. This month, locals can dine on the creations of James Beard Award-Winning Chefs at Rancho Bernardo Inn, or take advantage of berry season at the annual Vista Strawberry Festival. Theatre lovers can enjoy a showing of Kim’s Convenience at The Old Globe, while the San Diego Natural History Museum invites art enthusiasts to view its latest marine-themed exhibit. Grab your tickets and crack open that planner. Here are all the best things to do in San Diego this month:

Concerts & Festivals | Theater & Art Exhibits | More Fun Things to Do

Concerts & Festivals in San Diego This Month

29

Louisiana legend Juvenile, enhances by the live instrumentation of The 400 Degreez Band, will perform career hits and his newest album, Boiling Point, at House of Blues San Diego.

Photo Credit: Dahlia Katz

Theater & Art Exhibits in San Diego This Month

5/5–6/1

Turning the spotlight on contemporary LGBTQ artists, the inaugural ArtSpectrum 2026 will showcase both the grand and intimate scale of contemporary painters, photographers, and mixed media artists at Village Arts Outreach in Balboa Park.

12–24

The only ordinary element of the San Diego International Fringe Festival is the constant thrill of the extraordinary. Discover a plethora of innovative performances at venues from Pacific Beach to Baja.

5/15–6/14

A Korean-Canadian family balances tradition and assimilation from their Toronto storefront in Ins Choi’s comforting satire Kim’s Convenience, making its local premier at The Old Globe.

5/22–2/2027

Ocean debris will receive a new beginning at the San Diego Natural History Museum. Using repurposed pollution, Washed Ashore: Art to Save the Sea depicts creatively sculpted marine life.

More Fun Things to Do in San Diego This Month

4/30–5/3

Enjoy fine dining at its finest from a lineup of gastronomic titans during 54 Hours with James Beard Award-Winning Chefs. Savor elegant meals, masterclasses, tastings, and more at Rancho Bernardo Inn.

2

Unlimited bites, regional craft beers, and animal observations are on the menu for San Diego Zoo Food, Wine & Brew (with live music), a culinary evening in support of the San Diego Wildlife Alliance.

7

Spend An Evening with David Sedaris, humorist, essayist, and best-selling author. Never afraid to point the pen at himself, Sedaris will share old favorites and works in progress in the classic satirical style he’s known for at Jacobs Music Center.

15–17

Say cheese! And toast to the Cheese & Libation Expo. Explore three days of all-you-can eat and drink fare at BRICK, along with boutique shopping and bountiful pairings.

PARTNER CONTENT

10 Years In, Puffer and Malarkey Are Just Getting Started

Elevating an Icon: Inside the La Jolla Beach & Tennis Clu…

16

Stroll the private grounds of several luxurious homes, accompanied by live music, tabletop designs, and outdoor artistry, during the Secret Garden Tour, La Jolla Historical Society‘s flora and fauna fundraiser.

24

Vista recalls its days as a strawberry-producing superpower through its free Strawberry Festival. Wear your berry best fit, watch film screenings, and enter contests for shortcake, pie, and sundae indulging.

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San Diego, CA

City considering cutting funding to resource center for those experiencing homelessness

Published

16 hours ago

April 20, 2026

Press Room

City considering cutting funding to resource center for those experiencing homelessness

Last week Mayor Todd Gloria released the budget proposal for the 2027 fiscal budget. Protected homeless services is among his top priorities mentioned in the proposal. However, some of the reductions he’s proposing could impact thousands of San Diegans experiencing homelessness.

Located on 17^th and K Street, the Neil Good Day Center offers an array of services to nearly seven thousand people experiencing homelessness. The services include giving them a place to shower and do laundry, and connecting them to a case manager, among others.

“These are critical services that are helping people off the streets, but really better their lives and their health and their employment situation as well,” Deacon Vargas with Father Joe’s Villages said.

Deacon Jim Vargas heads Father Joe’s Villages, which runs the center. He said through their prevention and diversion strategies, they’ve managed to keep nearly one thousand individuals from falling into homelessness.

“So by helping them pay rent, or helping them with their utilities, or helping them to reunite with family,” Vargas said.

Right now, the city allocates at least $850,000 per year to the Neil Good Day Center, according to Vargas.

But the future and funding for these services are in limbo because of Mayor Todd Gloria’s proposed budget cuts.

“The impact to those whom we’ve been serving the Daily Center would be very severe,” Deacon Vargas said.

In a statement to NBC 7, Mayor Todd Gloria said in part, “We must find more efficient and cost-effective ways to address this crisis and prioritize funding for programs that provide shelter beds and maximize resources to programs that place people into permanent housing.”

Since it’s still at a proposal stage, Deacon Vargas said it’s unclear how the city will decide to move forward.

However, Deacon Vargas said services would be significantly reduced because they would be forced to operate solely on a budget of about half a million dollars they receive from philanthropy.

“The hours would be cut. Some days would be cut. We would have showers that might be impacted because they’re given seven days a week and we’d close two days a week, then the showers would be five days a week, the case management,” Deacon Vargas said.

Deacon Vargas is certain of one thing.

He would like to continue offering services at the Day Center, even if the city goes through with the funding cuts.

“As we work with individuals at the Day Center and at Father Joe’s Villages, the community becomes healthier as a result of it,” Deacon Vargas said.

The budget also recommends additional cuts to homeless services, but does not give specifics as to where those cuts would be.

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