Dating has always been a source of drama and anxiety, both in real life and online. From reality TV shows with contestants dating multiple suitors to social media platforms where potential matches pop red balloons to show disinterest, the media often portrays dating as a game.

While these may be sensationalized versions of what takes place in the real world, dating remains challenging, particularly in the online realm. Dating apps have expanded the pool of potential partners but also have made forming genuine connections more difficult.

With the ability to conceal one’s identity or present an idealized version of oneself, mind games have become increasingly common, especially in the digital dating landscape. These manipulative tactics range from minor behaviors, like deliberately delaying responses to messages, to more serious actions such as ‘ghosting’ – abruptly cutting off all communication – or cyberstalking.

To gain a deeper insight into who is engaging in these behaviors, DatingNews.com polled over 2,000 Americans, exploring their experiences with mind games in romantic relationships.

Some of their key findings include:

• About 1 in every 5 respondents have created or used a fake social media account to cyber stalk someone they’re romantically interested in
• 56% of those surveyed have suddenly cut off communication or “ghosted” someone
• 30% of of those surveyed have canceled or moved plans to make the other person think they were busy when they, in fact, were not
• On average, 40% of survey participants have given a romantic partner an ultimatum
• 1 in every 3 Americans surveyed has intentionally sent a “wrong” message to someone to spark conversation

The survey also aimed to determine which states have the highest concentration of master manipulators.

According to the survey, The First State ranks first in the nation for having the biggest players.

Survey says Delaware residents are masters of romantic maneuvers

In the high-stakes game of love, it seems Delaware residents have emerged as the reigning champions of romantic gaslighters. According to survey responses, online daters in the First State were more frequently found to use mind games, such as canceling plans to appear busy, posting on social media for a specific person to see, and using the silent treatment in relationships.

The survey found these are the Top 10 states for online dating mind games: 

1. Delaware
2. Alabama
3. Mississippi
4. Oklahoma
5. Nevada
6. Hawaii
7. Illinois
8. Maryland
9. Georgia
10. Texas

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This Delaware city has the most chivalrous men

While Delaware tops the ranking for online dating mind games, it’s worth exploring how this translates to real-life interactions. Interestingly, a separate DatingNews.com survey focused on the charm and chivalry of men in various cities.

In the poll, 3,000 single women were asked where the most charming men could be found. It turns out, Delaware’s most charming and chivalrous men reside in Wilmington, the state’s largest city.

The survey asked women to identify traits that best represent a ‘mannered man,’ based on behaviors like opening doors, planning thoughtful dates, and engaging in respectful conversations.

The findings showed single women looked for: 

• Patience and understanding: 32%
• Politeness and respect: 31%
• Thoughtfulness and consideration: 19%
• Good communication skills: 14%
• Humility and modesty: 4%

The importance of chivalry remains significant, with 56% of respondents considering it “very important,” 41% deeming it “moderately important,” and only 2% attaching little importance to it.

The poll also unveiled a glimpse into the expectations of modern women in the dating world, noting the most appreciated behaviors on a date include:

1. Engaging in respectful conversations (43%)
2. Planning thoughtful and creative dates (18%)
3. Offering genuine compliments (14%)
4. Opening doors (12%)
5. Being punctual and considerate of time (12%)

These findings illustrate that while the dating landscape has evolved, traditional values still play a crucial role in face-to-face interactions where the right mix of attentiveness, creativity and respect can prove irresistible.

You can contact Anitra Johnson at ajohnson@delawareonline.com.