Connect with us

Politics

Column: 'The Onion buys Infowars' is not the craziest headline this week

Published

on

Column: 'The Onion buys Infowars' is not the craziest headline this week

Here’s a quiz. Read the following sentences and decide if they’re a headline from satirical news site the Onion or my summaries of comments from the unironic mind of conspiracy theorist Alex Jones and his disinformation network, Infowars.

Cloaked Hillary Clinton beckons Harris to follow her into woods.

Majority of frogs in the United States are now gay.

Dolphin spends amazing vacation swimming with stockbroker.

Deadly floods in Texas generated by Air Force’s weather machine.

Advertisement

Hard to tell, but from here on out, you may not need to because the two entities are poised to live under the same umbrella.

The Onion bought Infowars. And no, this is not a jokey Onion headline. (Quiz answers appear below.)

Thursday it was revealed that the Onion won an auction to acquire Infowars, Alex Jones’ vile repository of harmful lies that was sold as part of a defamation settlement after he falsely claimed that the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting in Connecticut was a hoax. Jones was found guilty of defamation in 2022 by juries in Texas and Connecticut.

“Our goal in a couple of years is for people to think of Infowars as the funniest and dumbest website that exists,” said Ben Collins, the Onion’s CEO. “It was previously the dumbest website that exists.”

The Onion’s bid was backed by the families of eight victims of the 2012 Sandy Hook massacre and a first responder. A federal judge in Texas ordered a hearing into how the Onion won the bidding after Jones and his lawyers raised questions about how the auction was conducted, but not before the Onion shut down Infowars in preparation for its grand transformation from a hateful fake news empire to a parody of a hateful fake news empire.

Advertisement

Should the deal go through, the Onion will have an exclusive advertising agreement with the gun control group Everytown for Gun Safety.

“We thought it would be a very funny joke if we bought this thing, probably one of the better jokes we’ve ever told,” Collins told the Associated Press. “The [Sandy Hook] families decided they would effectively join our bid, back our bid, to try to get us over the finish line. Because by the end of the day, it was us or Alex Jones, who could either continue this website unabated, basically unpunished, for what he’s done to these families over the years, or we could make a dumb, stupid website, and we decided to do the second thing.”

Jones is renowned for “reexamining” American tragedies and decrying them as a hoax. According to him, 9/11 was an inside job, the Boston Marathon bombing was staged by the FBI and the shooting of former Arizona Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords was part of a clandestine mind-control operation.

Alongside the lies and conspiracy theories, Jones used Infowars to sell millions of dollars’ worth of merchandise such as DVDs and T-shirts, building a media empire that spanned the web, radio and subscription video. But his major source of revenue was a collection of dietary supplements catering to the specific needs and paranoias of his fan base: Infowars Life Silver Bullet Colloidal Silver. Infowars Life Super Male Vitality. Infowars Life Liver Shield.

Now add humor to the mix, and drop the rest of that other stuff.

Advertisement

One need to look no further than the Onion’s leading editorial Friday to see why Infowars has a bright future in the comedic fictional news zone. The Onion’s make-believe owner, Bryce P. Tetraeder, Global Tetrahedron CEO, penned the explainer about why he chose to buy Jones’ reprehensible site.

“Founded in 1999 on the heels of the Satanic ‘panic’ and growing steadily ever since, Infowars has distinguished itself as an invaluable tool for brainwashing and controlling the masses,” he wrote. “With a shrewd mix of delusional paranoia and dubious anti-aging nutrition hacks, they strive to make life both scarier and longer for everyone, a commendable goal. They are a true unicorn, capable of simultaneously inspiring public support for billionaires and stoking outrage at an inept federal state that can assassinate JFK but can’t even put a man on the moon.”

Tetraeder’s X account describes him as “Global Tetrahedron CEO, chairman, media proprietor, entrepreneur, human trafficker, thought leader, and venture capitalist.”

But what is he really? Let’s ask Jones. He’s a corporate tendrils, deep-state expert. Or was.

In a video posted on Thursday, Jones railed about the sale, calling it unconstitutional. “I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I’m going to be here until they come in there and turn the lights off,” he said.

Advertisement

Write your own “Disgraced CEO found in dark closet of old office” headline here.

As for the quiz,”Cloaked Hillary” and the vacationing dolphin were from the Onion.

The gay frogs and Air Force weather machine were from Jones.

But they’re no more outlandish than recent headlines about a Fox News co-host and combat veteran running the Department of Defense, or an anti-vaxxer picked to lead the Department of Health and Human Services. If only those were fake.

Advertisement

Politics

U.S. Seizes Second Tanker Carrying Iranian Oil

Published

on

U.S. Seizes Second Tanker Carrying Iranian Oil

U.S. military forces stopped and boarded a second sanctioned tanker carrying oil from Iran in the Indian Ocean, the Pentagon said on Thursday, ramping up pressure on Tehran as the Trump administration seeks to resume negotiations to end the war.

A naval boarding team roped down from hovering helicopters and fanned out on the vessel, the M/T Majestic X, according to a Pentagon statement that included a 17-second video of the operation.

The military said the boarding was part of a “global maritime enforcement to disrupt illicit networks and interdict vessels providing material support to Iran, wherever they operate.”

Earlier this week, Navy SEALS boarded another ship in the Indian Ocean, the M/T Tifani, after the Pentagon said it was carrying oil from Iran.

Navy destroyers are also shadowing several other Iranian vessels, including the Dorena and Sevin, which had left from the Iranian port of Chabahar before the U.S.-imposed blockade began on April 13, a U.S. military official said. The Navy is directing those ships to return to an Iranian port, the official said.

Advertisement

With the M/T Tifani and M/T Majestic X now at least temporarily in the custody of the military, a U.S. military official said it was up to the White House to decide what to do with the sanctioned vessels and their cargo. The administration previously seized several tankers carrying illicit oil from Venezuela after a U.S. commando raid there in January that seized Nicolás Maduro, the country’s president.

“International waters cannot be used as a shield by sanctioned actors,” the Pentagon said in its statement on Thursday, adding that the department would “continue to deny illicit actors and their vessels freedom of maneuver in the maritime domain.”

Gen. Dan Caine, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, hinted last week that the U.S. military would likely commence boarding operations like the ones this week. He said that U.S. military commanders elsewhere in the world, and especially in the Indo-Pacific region, would “actively pursue any Iranian-flagged vessel or any vessel attempting to provide material support to Iran.”

The U.S. Navy has turned back at least 31 ships trying to enter or exit Iranian ports since an American blockade outside the contested Strait of Hormuz began about a week ago, U.S. Central Command said late Wednesday.

Last Sunday, a Navy destroyer disabled and seized the Touska, an Iranian cargo ship, after it tried to evade the blockade. It was the first time a vessel was reported to have tried to evade the U.S.-imposed blockade on any ship entering or exiting Iranian ports since it took effect last week.

Advertisement
Continue Reading

Politics

Leavitt explains why Iran’s seizure of two ships doesn’t violate Trump’s ceasefire

Published

on

Leavitt explains why Iran’s seizure of two ships doesn’t violate Trump’s ceasefire

NEWYou can now listen to Fox News articles!

White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt explained why President Donald Trump does not consider Iran’s seizure of two ships in the Strait of Hormuz a violation of the ceasefire agreement.

Leavitt made the statement during an interview with Fox News’ Martha McCallum on Wednesday just hours after Iran captured the Greek and Mediterranean-flagged vessels.

“Does the seizure of two ships — as we said, they were Greek and Mediterranean-owned ships with cargo on them, and the reports are that Iran basically seized them and then moved them into Iranian waters. We don’t know what’s going to happen to these crews. We’re not sure where all of this is going. Does the president view that as a violation of the ceasefire?” McCallum asked.

“No, because these were not U.S. ships. These were not Israeli ships. These were two international vessels,” Leavitt responded.

Advertisement

US FORCES ATTEMPTING TO BOARD SANCTIONED RUSSIAN-FLAGGED OIL TANKER IN NORTH ATLANTIC, SOURCES SAY

Karoline Leavitt, White House press secretary, conducts a press briefing. (Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images)

“And for the American media, who are sort of blowing this out of proportion to discredit the president’s facts that he has completely obliterated Iran’s conventional Navy, these two ships were taken by speedy gunboats. Iran has gone from having the most lethal Navy in the Middle East to now acting like a bunch of pirates. They don’t have control over the strait,” she continued.

“This is piracy that we are seeing on display. And the naval blockade that the United States has imposed continues to be incredibly effective. And, to be clear, the blockade is on ships going to and from Iranian ports. And the point of this is the economic leverage that we maintain over Iran now. While there’s a ceasefire with respect to the military and kinetic strikes, Operation Economic Fury continues, and the crux of that is this naval blockade,” she added.

The Iranian made ‘Seraj’ a high-speed missile-launching assault boat on display in Tehran on August 23, 2010, as Iran kicked off mass production of two high-speed missile-launching assault boats the ‘Seraj’ (Lamp) and ‘Zolfaqar’ (named after Shiite Imam Ali’s sword) speedboats which will be manufactured at the marine industries complex of the ministry of defense. (YALDA MOAIERY/AFP via Getty Images)

Advertisement

Iran’s Revolutionary Guard Corps said the vessels, identified as the MSC Francesca and the Epaminondas, were operating without proper authorization and had tampered with navigation systems, accusations that could not be independently verified. The ships had earlier reported coming under fire near the strait, underscoring the increasingly volatile conditions in one of the world’s most critical shipping lanes.

US ‘LOCKED AND LOADED’ TO DESTROY IRAN’S ‘CROWN JEWEL’ ‘IF WE WANT,’ TRUMP WARNS

The Guard attacked a third ship, identified as the Euphoria, which had become “stranded” on the Iranian coast, Iranian media reported. It did not seize that vessel.

Ships and tankers in the Strait of Hormuz off the coast of Musandam, Oman, April 18, 2026. (Reuters)

Both the U.S. and Iranian sides have targeted commercial and cargo vessels as part of a broader pressure campaign tied to stalled negotiations. U.S. forces have also moved to seize at least one Iranian-linked vessel in the region, with each side accusing the other of violating the terms of a fragile ceasefire.

Advertisement

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE FOX NEWS APP

The Strait of Hormuz is a vital artery for global oil shipments, with roughly 20% of the world’s supply passing through it. Traffic has slowed dramatically as ships reroute or avoid the area amid gunfire, seizures and conflicting directives from both militaries.

Fox News’ Morgan Phillips contributed to this report.

Continue Reading

Politics

Bass, Barger meet with Trump to push for L.A. fire recovery funds

Published

on

Bass, Barger meet with Trump to push for L.A. fire recovery funds

Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass and L.A. County Supervisor Kathryn Barger met privately with President Trump and administration officials Wednesday to press for federal support and yet-unpaid wildfire recovery funding as the region continues to rebuild from the 2025 fires.

“This afternoon we met with President Trump and Administration officials to advocate for families who lost everything,” Bass and Barger said in a statement. “We had a very positive discussion about FEMA and other rebuilding funds as well as the support of the President to continue joining us in pressuring the insurance companies to pay what they owe — and for the big banks to step up to ease the financial pressure on L.A. families.”

Barger said the two leaders had a “high-level discussion” with the president in the Oval Office, sharing stories about what fire survivors are experiencing day to day. She added that “we left details behind with the President,” but did not specify whether Trump made any funding or policy promises during the meeting.

“First and foremost, today’s meeting was to thank the President for his initial support of infusing federal resources to expedite debris removal, as well as his recent tweet about insurance companies, which have already proven fruitful,” she said in a statement provided to The Times.

Bass was similarly reserved about the discussions, telling reporters that “we will follow up with the details,” but signaled progress is being made on federal support.

Advertisement

“I think what’s important is that we certainly got the president’s support in terms of, you know, what is needed, and then the appropriate people were in the room for us to follow up. And that was Russ Vought, who is the head of the Office of Management and budget,” Bass told KNX on Wednesday.

The meeting comes on the heels of a yearlong standoff between California leaders and the Trump administration over wildfire recovery funding, disaster response and whether the federal government should have a say in local rebuilding permitting.

California leaders, led by Gov. Gavin Newsom, have accused the Trump administration of withholding billions in critical wildfire aid, prompting a lawsuit over stalled recovery funds. Officials allege political bias in the delay of billions of dollars from the Federal Emergency Management Agency.

Newsom visited Washington in December. When he made his rounds on Capitol Hill, he met with five lawmakers, including three who serve on the Senate and House appropriations committees, to renew calls for $33.9 billion in federal aid for Los Angeles County fire recovery.

But the governor said he was denied a meeting with FEMA and would not say whether he had attempted to meet with Trump to discuss the issue.

Advertisement

Bass, meanwhile, appears to have found a path to the president on a subject that has been paramount for her community.

The fruitful meeting comes after Trump lobbed insults at the mayor at a news conference earlier this year, where he called her “incompetent” for how she handled last year’s wildfire recovery efforts. He alleged that under Bass’ leadership, the city’s delay in issuing local building permits will take years when it should have taken “two or three days.”

California officials, including Newsom, have urged the Trump administration to send Congress a formal request for the $33.9 billion in recovery aid needed to rebuild homes, schools, utilities and other critical infrastructure destroyed or damaged when the fires tore through neighborhoods more than 15 months ago.

What Bass and Barger’s meeting with the president ultimately produces remains to be seen.

The billions in recovery aid have not yet materialized, but the meeting could potentially give those discussions new momentum.

Advertisement

The White House did not immediately respond to a request seeking comment about the meeting.

Earlier this month, Trump criticized insurance provider State Farm on Truth Social for its handling of the devastating Los Angeles County wildfires. He accused the insurance giant of abandoning its policyholders when tragedy struck.

“It was brought to my attention that the Insurance Companies, in particular, State Farm, have been absolutely horrible to people that have been paying them large Premiums for years, only to find that when tragedy struck, these horrendous Companies were not there to help!” Trump wrote.

But the rebuke didn’t come out of the blue. It stemmed from a controversial February visit to Los Angeles by Trump administration officials.

Trump tapped Environmental Protection Agency Administrator Lee Zeldin in an effort to strip California state and local governments of their authority to permit the rebuilding of homes destroyed in the Eaton and Palisades fires.

Advertisement

Within the week, Zeldin was in Los Angeles, bashing Newsom and Los Angeles officials at a roundtable with fire victims and reporters, saying that residents were suffering from “bureaucratic, red tape delays and incompetency” and that leadership was “denying them … the ability to rebuild their lives”.

During the trip, officials heard direct complaints from local leaders and fire victims about insurers being slow, restrictive and insufficient with their claim payouts.

After these meetings, Trump directed Zeldin to investigate the insurers’ responses. State Farm, facing roughly $7 billion in fire-related claims, is also under formal investigation by California’s insurance commissioner over its handling of the crisis.

Despite tensions with the administration, Bass and Barger appeared confident that progress was being made on the insurance and funding issues.

“Our job is to fight for our communities,” their joint statement concluded. “When it comes to this recovery, our federal partners are essential, and we are grateful for the support of the President.”

Advertisement
Continue Reading
Advertisement

Trending