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How a Family of 4 Lives on $168,000 in East Elmhurst, Queens

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How a Family of 4 Lives on 8,000 in East Elmhurst, Queens

How can people possibly afford to live in one of the most expensive cities on the planet? It’s a question New Yorkers hear a lot, often delivered with a mix of awe, pity and confusion.

We surveyed hundreds of New Yorkers about how they spend, splurge and save. We found that many people — rich, poor or somewhere in between — live life as a series of small calculations that add up to one big question: What makes living in New York worth it?

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When Erika Fernandez-Pacheco was a child growing up in New York City, her family lived largely paycheck to paycheck. Her parents, both immigrants, met at a factory in Manhattan. Her father later worked as a taxi driver and a bodega owner.

These days, Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco and her husband, Manuel Pacheco, are far from rich, but they’re more than comfortable.

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Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco works as a sports journalist and content creator, and Mr. Pacheco works in food service at a Manhattan hotel. Together, they earn between $165,000 and $170,000 in a typical year. They have two daughters, 4 and 1.

“We’re not just getting by,” Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco said. “We have a life.”

Luck be a landlord

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Having a good landlord in New York City is the best kind of luck.

Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco, 37, and Mr. Pacheco, 38, moved to East Elmhurst, in Queens near LaGuardia Airport, during the Covid pandemic. Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco was pregnant, and they were in search of more space and cheaper rent. They found both in a three-family home on a quiet street.

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Their 700-square-foot apartment has two bedrooms and lots of closet space. The landlords, who live downstairs, have not raised the couple’s $1,800 monthly rent since 2021, when they moved in.

Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco, a born and bred New Yorker, wishes more people who feel they can’t afford life in New York would consider moving to relatively affordable neighborhoods like East Elmhurst. Anna Watts for The New York Times

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But their apartment is far from public transit. Mr. Pacheco has to leave for work by 4:15 most mornings, before the bus starts running. So he uses his monthly Lyft membership to take a car to the nearest subway, which is a half-hour walk away. It’s a $10 expense, even before he swipes his transit card.

The couple looked for apartments closer to the subway but found that rents were $2,500 or more for cramped spaces. They decided to stay put, content with their affordable apartment in their affordable neighborhood.

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Recently, Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco has been scrolling a Reddit page where New York parents vent about how expensive it is to live here. Sometimes, their complaints make her roll her eyes.

“The amount of people who are like, ‘I can’t afford to live in New York’ — I’m like, duh, you live in Park Slope!” she said. “Move to Queens, move to the Bronx.”

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Grandparents make the best babysitters

The couple have never paid for a babysitter, relying instead on both sets of grandparents to help care for their daughters.

It’s a lot to ask of their aging parents, but the nearby day care centers charge about $2,500 a month, more than the family’s rent.

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The system isn’t exactly foolproof. Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco works from home part of the week and watches her children when she has breaks.

She’ll never forget the morning when she was logging on for an important Zoom meeting and her older daughter started vomiting. Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco’s parents were still en route to the house, so she had to slam her laptop shut and rush to her daughter.

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When her younger child had a bad case of the respiratory infection R.S.V., Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco worked from the hospital.

The family has found real relief in the city’s free prekindergarten program. The couple’s older daughter attended 3-K last year, and after a tough transition to being dropped off at school, she came to love it. She’s in pre-K this year, which has helped relieve the burden on the grandparents, and will attend a local public school come fall.

The family’s medical costs are minimal. Because Mr. Pacheco is a member of the Hotel and Gaming Trades Council, one of the city’s most powerful unions, the entire family has access to free insurance offered at the union’s dedicated health centers.

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The couple is selective about which activities they send the girls to. They’ve signed their older daughter up for swim lessons at a local pool, which cost $45 a week. In the winter, when it’s too cold to take the kids to the playground, they visit a bouncy house nearby, which costs $17 for two hours.

‘Not taking this money to the grave’

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The family’s ability to relax enough to enjoy their lives requires long-term planning and diligent saving.

The couple aims to put away about $1,200 a month, hoping to someday have enough saved for a down payment on a house. Sometimes, though, they manage only $500 or so.

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They are strategic about their grocery shopping.

The couple uses Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco’s father’s wholesale account at Jetro, a wholesale shop for people in the food business, left over from his days as a bodega owner. They shop there twice a year to buy frozen chicken and beef in bulk, typically spending $150 per trip. The family spends another $250 or so on groceries a month, splitting their shopping between Costco, which Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco thinks has the best prices, and BJ’s, which she believes has the better coupons.

“I feel like I’ve turned into my parents,” Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco said. “I ask around about how much a head of lettuce costs” at different stores.

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They waited to buy new tires for their car, which is now paid off, so they could save $600 on a new set during a Black Friday sale.

That budgeting allows them to spend on what they really care about.

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They threw big parties for each daughter’s first birthday, with more than 100 guests, top-shelf liquor and lots of food, including homemade ceviche from Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco’s parents, sourced from a seafood market in Flushing, Queens. The total cost for their older daughter’s party, including the venue rental, was about $4,500, which the couple thought was worth it to mark a major milestone for their family.

The couple asked their guests to contribute to their daughters’ college savings accounts in lieu of gifts.

And they try to take one big family vacation a year, most recently to Barbados, which cost about $4,000 between flights and hotels.

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It has taken some time for Ms. Fernandez-Pacheco to feel comfortable splurging on herself and her family from time to time. When she frets over a decision, she thinks of her mother-in-law’s encouragement to live a little: “You’re not taking this money to the grave.”

We want to hear from you about how you afford life in one of the most expensive cities in the world. We’re looking to speak with people of all income ranges, with all kinds of living situations and professions.

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How a Parks Worker Lives on $37,500 in Tompkinsville, Staten Island

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How a Parks Worker Lives on ,500 in Tompkinsville, Staten Island

How can people possibly afford to live in one of the most expensive cities on the planet? It’s a question New Yorkers hear a lot, often delivered with a mix of awe, pity and confusion.

We surveyed hundreds of New Yorkers about how they spend, splurge and save. We found that many people — rich, poor or somewhere in between — live life as a series of small calculations that add up to one big question: What makes living in New York worth it?

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Sara Robinson boarded a Greyhound bus from Oregon to New York City to attend Hunter College in the early 2000s, bright-eyed and eager to pick up odd jobs to fuel her dream of living there.

For a long time, she made it work. But recently, that has been more challenging than ever.

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Right around her 40th birthday, Ms. Robinson began to feel financially squeezed in Brooklyn, where she had lived for years. Ms. Robinson (no relation to this reporter) was also feeling too grown to live with roommates.

“As a child,” she said, “you don’t think you’re going to have a roommate at 40.” She decided to move into a place of her own: a one-bedroom apartment in the Tompkinsville neighborhood of Staten Island.

After she moved, the preschool where she’d worked for over a decade closed. Now, she works two jobs. She is a seasonal employee for the state Office of Parks, Recreation and Historic Preservation, working from Tuesday to Saturday. And on Monday nights, she sells concessions at the West Village movie theater Film Forum, which pays $25 an hour plus tips.

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Ms. Robinson, now 45, loves her job as an environmental educator at a state park on Staten Island. Her team runs the park’s social media accounts and comes up with event programming, like a recent project tapping maple trees to make syrup.

But the role is temporary. Her last stint was from June 2024 to January 2025. Then she was unemployed until August 2025. Ms. Robinson’s current contract will be up in April, unless she gets an extension or a different parks job opens up.

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Ms. Robinson’s biweekly pay stubs from the parks department amount to about $1,300 before taxes. She barely felt a difference, she said, while she was out of work and pocketing around $880 every two weeks from her unemployment checks. (Her previous parks gig paid $1,100 a check.)

Living in New York’s Greenest Borough

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“It used to be, ‘There’s no way I’m moving to Staten Island,’” Ms. Robinson said. “But the place is close to the water. I’m three minutes from the ferry. The rest is history.” She lives on the third floor of a multifamily house, above an art studio and another tenant. Her rent is $1,600 a month, plus $125 in utilities, including her phone bill.

“If my situation changes, I don’t know if I could find something similar,” she said. “So much of my New York life has been feeling trapped to an apartment. You get a place for a good price, and you’re like, ‘I can’t leave now.’”

Staten Island is convenient for Ms. Robinson’s parks job, but it’s become harder to justify living in a borough where she knows few people. It takes more than an hour to get to friends in Brooklyn, an especially hard trek during the winter. After four years of living on Staten Island, Ms. Robinson feels somewhat isolated.

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“All my friends on Staten Island are senior citizens,” she said. “It’s great. I love it. But I do want friends closer to my age.”

One of Ms. Robinson’s friends, Ray, took her on nature walks and taught her about tree identification, sparking an interest in mycology, the study of mushrooms. This led to a productive — and free — fungi foraging hobby during unemployment. She has found all sorts of mushrooms, including, after a month of searching, the elusive morel.

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The Budgeting Game

Ms. Robinson doesn’t update her furniture often, but when she does, she shops stoop sales in Park Slope or other parts of Brooklyn.

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“It’s like a treasure hunt,” she said. “You could make a whole apartment off the street, off the stuff that people throw away.”

She also makes a game out of grocery shopping, biking to Sunset Park in Brooklyn or Manhattan’s Chinatown to go to stores where there are better deals. She budgets about $300 for groceries each month.

Ms. Robinson bikes almost everywhere, sometimes traveling a little farther to enter the Staten Island Railway at one of the stations that don’t charge a fare. She spends $80 a month on subway and ferry fares, and $5 a month for a discounted Citi Bike membership she gets through a credit union, though she usually uses her own bike. She is handy and does repairs herself.

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There are certain splurges — Ms. Robinson drops $400 once or twice a year on round-trip airfare to Seattle, where her family lives. She also spent $100 last year to see a concert at Forest Hills Stadium in Queens.

She said she has many financial saving graces. She has no student loans and no car to make payments on. She doesn’t get health insurance from her jobs, but she qualifies for Medicaid.

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She mostly eats at home, though sometimes friends will treat her to dinner. She repays them with tickets to Film Forum movies.

Nothing Beats the Twinkling Lights

Ms. Robinson’s friends often talk about leaving the city — and the country.

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Two friends have their eyes set on Sweden, where they hope to get the affordable child care and social safety net they are struggling to access in New York.

Ms. Robinson can’t see herself moving elsewhere in the United States, but she is entertaining the idea of an international move if she can’t hack it on Staten Island.

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Yet the pull of the city is hard for her to resist.

“I just get a rush when I’m riding the Staten Island Ferry across the bay,” she said. “You see all the little twinkling lights. It’s this feeling of, ‘everything is possible here.’”

That feeling, plus the many friendly faces Ms. Robinson sees every day — the ferry operators, the conductors on the Staten Island Railway, her co-workers at Film Forum — are what tie her to New York.

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“My savings are not increasing, so there’s that,” she said. “But I’ve been OK so far. I think I’m going to figure it out.”

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How the Editor in Chief of Marie Claire Gets Styled for a Trip to Italy

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How the Editor in Chief of Marie Claire Gets Styled for a Trip to Italy

Nikki Ogunnaike, the editor in chief of Marie Claire magazine, did not grow up the scion of an Anna Wintour or a Marc Jacobs.

But, she said, “my mom and dad are both very stylish people.”

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They got dressed up to go to church every week in her hometown Springfield, Va. Her mother managed a Staples; her father, a CVS. “Presentation is important to them,” she said.

Since landing her first internship with Glamour magazine in college, Ms. Ogunnaike, 40, has held editorial roles there and at Elle magazine and GQ. She has been in the top post at Marie Claire since 2023.

She recently spent a Saturday with The New York Times as she prepared for Milan Fashion Week.

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How a Physical Therapist and a Retiree Live on $208,000 in Harlem

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How a Physical Therapist and a Retiree Live on 8,000 in Harlem

How can people possibly afford to live in one of the most expensive cities on the planet? It’s a question New Yorkers hear a lot, often delivered with a mix of awe, pity and confusion.

We surveyed hundreds of New Yorkers about how they spend, splurge and save. We found that many people — rich, poor or somewhere in between — live life as a series of small calculations that add up to one big question: What makes living in New York worth it?

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It has never really occurred to Marian or Charles Wade to live anywhere but the city where they were born and where they raised their children.

New York is in their bones. “We have our roots here, and our families enjoyed life here before us,” Ms. Wade said.

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And they feel lucky. Between Mr. Wade’s pension, earned after more than 40 years as an analyst at the Manhattan district attorney’s office, and his Social Security benefits, along with Ms. Wade’s work as a physical therapist at a psychiatric center, they bring in about $208,000 a year.

Still, it’s hard for the couple not to notice how much the city has changed as it has become wealthier.

About 10 years ago, Ms. Wade, 65, and Mr. Wade, 69, sold the Morningside Heights apartment they had lived in for decades. The Manhattan neighborhood had become more affluent, and tensions over how their building should be managed and how much residents should be expected to pay for upkeep boiled over between people who had lived there for years and newer neighbors.

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They found a new home in Harlem, large enough to fit their two children, who are now adults struggling to afford the city’s housing market.

All in the Family

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Ms. Wade knew it was time to leave Morningside Heights when she spotted her husband hiding behind a bush outside their building, hoping to avoid an unpleasant new neighbor. They had bought their apartment in 1994 for $206,000, using some money they had inherited from their families, and sold it in 2015 for $1.13 million.

The couple found a new apartment in the Sugar Hill section of Harlem for $811,000, and put most of the money down upfront. They took out a loan with a good rate for the remaining cost, and had a $947 monthly payment. They recently finished paying off the mortgage, but they have monthly maintenance payments of $1,555, as well as two temporary assessments to help improve the building, totaling $415 a month.

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Their two children each moved home shortly after graduating from college.

The couple’s son, Jacob Wade, 28, split an apartment with three roommates nearby for a while, but spent down his savings and moved back in with his parents. He is searching for an affordable one bedroom nearby and plans to move out later in the year. Their daughter, Elka Wade, 27, came home after college but recently moved to an apartment in Astoria, Queens, with roommates.

Until their daughter moved out a few weeks ago, she and her brother each took a bedroom, and Mr. and Ms. Wade slept in the dining room, which they had converted into their bedroom with the help of a Murphy bed and a new set of curtains for privacy.

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There is very little storage space. A piano occupies an entire closet in their son’s bedroom, because the family has no other place to fit it.

The setup is cramped, but close quarters have their benefits: When their daughter, a classically trained cellist, was living there, she often practiced at home in the evenings. “I love listening to her play,” Ms. Wade said.

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Three Foodtowns and a Thrift Shop

The Wades do what they can to keep their costs low. They’ve decided against installing new, better insulated windows in their drafty apartment. They don’t go on vacations, instead visiting their small weekend home in rural upstate New York. And they’ve pulled back on takeout food and retail shopping.

Instead, Mr. Wade surveys the three Foodtown supermarkets near their home for the best deals, preferring one for produce and another for meat. The weekly grocery bill has been around $500 with both kids living at home, and the family usually orders delivery twice a week, rotating between Chinese and Indian food, which typically costs $70, including leftovers.

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For an occasional splurge, they love Pisticci, a nearby restaurant where the penne with homemade mozzarella costs $21.

The couple owns a car, which they park on the street for free. But they often use public transportation to avoid paying the $9 congestion pricing fee to drive downtown, or when they have a good parking spot they don’t want to give up. They have a senior discount for their transit cards, which allows them to pay $1.50 per subway or bus ride, rather than $3.

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Ms. Wade stopped shopping at the stores she used to frequent, like Eileen Fisher and Banana Republic, years ago. Instead, she visits a thrift store called Unique Boutique on the Upper West Side. She was browsing the aisles a few months ago, before a big Thanksgiving dinner, and spotted the perfect dress for the occasion for just $20.

But she has one nonnegotiable weekly expense: a private yoga lesson in an instructor’s apartment nearby, for $150 a session.

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Elka Wade, a cellist, often practices at home, to the delight of her parents. Bess Adler for The New York Times

Swapping Mortgage Payments for Singing Lessons

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For every member of the Wade family, life in New York is all about the arts.

The children each attended the Special Music School, a public school focused on the arts. Their son, an actor, teacher and director, works part time at the Metropolitan Opera and the Kaufman Music Center, a performing arts complex in Manhattan. His sister works in administration at the Kaufman Center.

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Mr. Wade is still close with friends from high school who are now professional musicians, and the couple often goes to see them play at venues like the Bitter End in Greenwich Village, where shows typically have a $12 cover and a two-drink minimum.

The couple has cut back on going to expensive concerts — they used to try to see Elvis Costello every time he came to New York, for example — but have timeworn strategies for getting affordable theater tickets.

They recently splurged on tickets to “Oedipus” on Broadway for themselves and their daughter, who they treated to a ticket as a birthday gift. The seats were in the nosebleed section, but still cost $80 apiece.

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The couple has a $75 annual membership to the Film Forum, which gives them reduced price tickets to movies. They occasionally get discounted tickets to the opera through their son’s work, and when they don’t, they pay for family circle passes, which are usually $47 a head, plus a $10 fee.

Ms. Wade, who grew up commuting from Flushing, Queens, to Manhattan to take dance lessons, sometimes takes $20 drop-in ballet classes during the week at the Dance Theater of Harlem, just a few blocks away from the apartment.

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Recently, when the couple paid off their mortgage, Ms. Wade celebrated by giving herself a treat: weekly private singing lessons, for $125 a session.

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