Here’s your round up of the seven wildest stories from last month. Let’s get started with the blazing insanity of a climate conference in Brazil and then look at six others.

1. COP Chaos

It’s November, and that usually means the eco-loons come out of the woodwork. For the past several years, November has brought the annual meeting of the Conference of the Parties, or COP. This year was COP30, held in Brazil and drawing more than 56,000 delegates and business representatives from around the globe. Yep, you made the connection — that’s a carbon footprint the size of a small city, flying all around the world to protest … the use of carbon.

It was far worse than that. First, there’s the massive highway they built right through the Amazon to get to the conference instead of, you know, doing it online. According to the BBC, that meant eight miles of “a new four-lane highway cutting through tens of thousands of acres of protected Amazon rainforest.” 

The highway had been proposed back in 2012, “but it had repeatedly been shelved because of environmental concerns.”

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Then rooms at the event were so expensive even some of the delegates balked at the cost. (And most weren’t paying for themselves.) So Brazil brought in two large cruise ships to house poorer delegates. One of them advertised that it “offers 11 restaurants, 12 bars, 3 swimming pools, and 8 hot tubs.” Life’s tough working to save Mother Earth. That’s not a climate event — it’s a 56,000-person group vacation.

2. The less-than-excellent Mr. Burns

We’re talking Ken Burns, sometime historian and all-around lefty. Burns is in the news for his new documentary series on the Revolutionary War. I’ll leave fact-checking that to actual historians. I’m here to mock Burns for his elitist view of rural America. Burns was interviewed on Bulwark’s “How to Fix It” podcast, and he decided to shill for his paymasters in formerly public media.

According to Burns, defunding public media will hurt us in non-blue America. “It’ll hurt mostly rural communities — maybe that’s their intention. There’ll be news deserts.” 

That’s right, folks in rural America must not have things like the internet to find news. He sounds like he expects us to be upset because we can’t hear NPR while sitting in our outhouse and drinking our moonshine. 

Rural America barely even notices public media. Those outlets are designed for upscale urban audiences who are more than 90% liberal. A country boy can survive … without NPR’s ever-left spin on the news.

3. A Toast to the Post

Things are changing in the opinion section of The Washington Post. In an effort to reach out to other voices, the paper launched a new section called Ripple. Depending on your age, that might mean what happens when you toss a pebble into a pond. Or it could conjure images of the great Redd Foxx playing Fred Sanford in “Sanford and Son.” His preferred drink on the show was a fortified wine called Ripple. For oldsters like myself, one wonders if the other names they considered were Mad Dog, Night Train or Thunderbird.

4. Farmers No Longer Dig It

Change, as we learned from President Barack Obama, is often not so good. Such is the fate for the Farmers’ Almanac. The almanac is, well, buying the farm. No, not that almanac, the other one — or, as The Associated Press put it, “not to be confused with its older, longtime competitor, The Old Farmer’s Almanac in neighboring New Hampshire.” 

Still, this Maine-based almanac has 208 years under its prodigious belt, and AP says, “it’s believed to be the oldest continually published periodical in North America.” 

All that is ending in 2026 due to a “chaotic media environment.” The staff has nothing to be ashamed of. They outlasted more than half the newspapers I ever worked for. Chaotic, indeed.

5. Down on the Farm

And while we are down on the farm, let’s talk sheep, followed by goat cuddling. The Washington Post ran a feature on a farmer who rescues gay sheep, under the memorable headline, “I love your sweater. Is it made from gay sheep wool?” 

According to the Post, “As many as one in 12 male sheep are non-procreative but show an — ahem — interest in other rams.” So the farmer, whose sheep carry names like “Marvin Gay,” did “a fashion hookup with Grindr,” appropriately the gay hookup site. Together, they launched a fashion show “to promote Rainbow Wool.” The title of the show: “I Wool Survive.”

Not to be outdone, USA Today marked Thanksgiving by writing about “turkey cuddle therapy.” “Cuddling turkeys, in particular,” we are told, “can be profound.” But don’t you dare touch a turkey without its permission. “All interaction between guests and animals happens on the animals’ terms − in other words, the turkey needs to choose me,” wrote the author. 

I will tell you, I cuddled some turkey on Thanksgiving — along with mashed potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie.

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6. House Hating

The media are bombarding us with well-earned complaints about how expensive life is for most Americans and how hard it is to buy a house. Leave it to lefty Vox to zig while the entire world zags. Vox ran a piece in November headlined, “Why owning a house is overrated.” 

Yeah, building equity and having a place you can fix up and call home — what craziness. What followed was an interview with Jerusalem Demsas, editor-in-chief of The Argument, who argues: “Homeownership is overrated.” Now, I agree houses don’t always go up in value, but to come out against the American Dream is uniquely liberal.

7. Hunka Hunka Burnin’ … Law 

Movies that involve quirky judges are more honest than we want to admit. A Missouri judge is losing his job for wearing an Elvis wig and playing “The King” during court cases. 

St. Louis Judge Matthew Thornhill “faces a six-month unpaid suspension under the deal he reached with the state,” according to AP. After that, he gets 18 more months on the bench before he steps down, possibly to go on tour. (People magazine even had photos of him as Elvis.)

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The Commission on Retirement, Removal and Discipline went after his love for the “King of Rock ‘n’ Roll,” noting how he posed “with staff in a plastic Elvis wig and sunglasses” and sang from the bench. 

The Elvis-is-everywhere schtick allegedly violated rules on “order and decorum,” despite 35 letters backing the judge’s character. So the judge was judged and found wanting.

On the bright side, he might have the makings of a sequel to “My Cousin Vinny.”

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