Lifestyle
Why is the ‘Bachelorette’ canceled? A guide to the Taylor Frankie Paul controversy
Taylor Frankie Paul attends the Oscars on Sunday, a week ahead of her scheduled Bachelorette premiere.
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The new season of ABC’s reality TV series The Bachelorette was all filmed and set to premiere on Sunday. But parent company Disney now says it will not air as planned.
The decision to shelve the show’s 22nd season came on Thursday, after TMZ published a video it says shows would-be bachelorette Taylor Frankie Paul physically attacking her then-boyfriend, Dakota Mortensen, in 2023.
“In light of the newly released video just surfaced today, we have made the decision to not move forward with the new season of ‘The Bachelorette’ at this time, and our focus is on supporting the family,” Disney Entertainment said in a statement reported by the Associated Press, New York Times and others.
The video, filmed by Mortensen, appears to show Paul hitting, grabbing and throwing three barstools at him. A child can be heard crying on the couch nearby, and Mortensen says at one point: “Your daughter is sitting right there.”
Paul has three children: two with her ex-husband Tate Paul and one, born in 2024, with Mortensen. She confirmed the end of their three-year on-again, off-again relationship in May 2025. NPR has reached out to both of their representatives.
In a statement shared with NBC News, Paul’s representative called the video the “latest installment of [Mortensen’s] never-ending, desperate, attention-seeking, destructive campaign to harm Taylor without any regard for the consequences for their child.”
Paul’s representative told People in a statement that Paul is “exploring all of her options, seeking support, and preparing to own and share her story,” and “very grateful for ABC’s support as she prioritizes her family’s safety and security.”
Mortenesen told Entertainment Weekly that he categorically denies “these baseless claims about me and our relationship,” calling it “a deeply upsetting situation.”
“I am focusing on our son and his safety, and hope that Taylor will do the same,” he added.
NPR has not independently verified the authenticity of the video, which TMZ says was used as evidence in legal proceedings. But it matches Utah’s Herriman City Police Department’s description of a February 2023 incident that led to Paul’s arrest on charges of assault, criminal mischief and commission of domestic violence in the presence of a child.
Court records obtained by NPR show that Paul agreed to plead guilty to the third-degree felony of aggravated assault and has been serving 36 months of probation. When asked about the incident on a 2025 podcast, she acknowledged that her kids were present but said she “never had hurt” her daughter and “never intentionally did anything with my children.”
The couple’s turbulent relationship was a central plot point of the other reality TV show that made Paul famous: The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, which premiered in 2024 and just released its fourth season last week.
Earlier this week, People and other entertainment outlets reported that filming of the show’s fifth season had been halted amid reports of an investigation into domestic assault allegations involving Paul and Mortensen — presumably a separate incident, though details are scarce.
An unnamed spokesperson with Utah’s Draper City Police Department told People that “allegations have been made in both directions,” and “contact was made with involved parties” on Feb. 24 and 25, though declined to elaborate as the investigation is ongoing. NPR has reached out to Draper police, but did not hear back in time for publication.
There’s a lot we still don’t know. But if you’re just tuning in, we can help fill in some gaps.
(Left-right) Jennifer Affleck, Mayci Neeley, Mikayla Matthews, Taylor Frankie Paul, and Miranda McWhorter of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives attend an event at SiriusXM Studios in May 2025.
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Who are we talking about?
At the center of the controversy is Taylor Frankie Paul.
She’s a 31-year-old influencer best known as the self-proclaimed creator of “MomTok,” a friend group-slash-collective of Utah-based Mormon moms that rose to social media fame in 2020.
They posted dance trends, beauty routines, skits and lifestyle videos to TikTok, promoting a more modern side of Mormonism and challenging its traditional gender roles. But it didn’t take long for controversy to strike, in the form of the 2022 “soft swinging scandal.”
The what scandal?
Paul revealed in a May 2022 livestream video that she and her then-husband, Tate Paul, had been “soft swinging” with other couples in their social circle. She described it as “when you hook up but don’t go all the way.”
“The agreement was just like, as long as we were both there and we saw it and we knew it, it was okay, and the second it goes behind without each other, then you’ve stepped out of the agreement,” she said. “And I did that.”
Paul and her then-husband, who had been in an open relationship, divorced later that year (she called the swinging situation “the tip of the iceberg” of their problems). Her confession also caused rifts in the MomTok community, since she had claimed — without naming names — that other members were involved in the swinging group.
When did Mortensen enter (and leave) the picture?
Paul and Mortensen confirmed their relationship on TikTok in September 2022, several months after she hinted at it online. It quickly turned rocky.
The couple broke up in December, then got back together in January 2023 — a month before the domestic violence incident that prompted Paul’s arrest. The relationship, while turbulent, continued, and Paul announced her pregnancy in September. Their son, Ever, was born in March 2024.
The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, the documentary-style show following Paul and her #MomTok circle, premiered on Hulu later that year.
The first season ended with the birth of Paul’s son and cliffhanger claims about Mortensen’s alleged infidelity, raised by another cast member, which he has denied. The two split in December 2024, but sparked reconciliation rumors the following spring. Their dynamic has remained a focus of the TV show, including in the most recent season.
What about these Mormon wives?
The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, aka SLOMW, follows eight Mormon moms-slash-influencers (and their families) as they navigate marriages, friendships, faith and increasingly, the personal and professional pressures of fame.
“I feel like if anything, it’s had a positive impact and it shows people that they don’t have to be perfect to be part of a religion, and be close to God and Jesus,” cast member Macyi Neeley told NPR last year.
Filming for the first season began in 2023, though paused and resumed after Paul’s arrest.
The first episode of its first season, which premiered in September 2024, shows Paul trying to smooth things over with the moms after the swinging scandal. It also covers the domestic violence incident, featuring body camera footage of police arresting a tearful Paul outside the house (though no footage of what transpired inside).
Hulu said the show’s premiere was its most-watched unscripted season debut of 2024, surpassing The Kardashians and leading to a rapid renewal of more episodes.
SLOMW has maintained a near-constant filming schedule, releasing two 10-episode seasons in 2025 and another earlier this month. Season four covers the fall of 2025, as Paul was preparing to film The Bachelorette.
The show’s popularity has catapulted several of its stars, not just Paul, into other high-profile roles. Two cast members, Whitney Leavitt and Jennifer Affleck, appeared on Dancing with the Stars. Leavitt is now doing a stint as Roxie in Chicago on Broadway, and helped the show smash its box-office record this week.
How did Paul become The Bachelorette?
Paul confirmed her relationship with Mortensen was officially over on a September 2025 episode of the Call Her Daddy podcast. That’s also where she announced she had been chosen as the bachelorette.
It was an unusual pick, not only because of Paul’s complicated relationship with her ex and her high profile, but because she hadn’t previously competed in the Bachelor franchise. That’s a first: Each bachelorette so far has been a fan-favorite contestant from the season of The Bachelor before it.
Disney is the parent company of both Hulu (SLOWM) and ABC (The Bachelorette). The choice to bring in an existing influencer-slash-reality star was seen as a move to revitalize the Bachelorette, which has seen a sharp decline in viewership in recent years. Part of that is, ironically, due to casting controversies including unexpected, post-season revelations about contestants on both sides of the rose.
What’s next for each show?
ABC plans to air a rerun of American Idol in the show’s place on Sunday. It’s not clear if Paul’s season of The Bachelorette will ever air. NPR has reached out to Disney for comment.
It’s also not clear when or whether filming of SLOMW will resume. At a press event for The Bachelorette earlier this week, Paul weighed in on the production pause, telling People: “my heart hurts to see it, to go through it, especially at this time.”
“It’s a heavy time, and it’s unfortunate,” she continued. “I’m struggling for sure, but also at the same time I feel like if I don’t show up, then I’m just giving these opportunities away and not enjoying what we’ve worked on and something super exciting that’s coming.”
The first time Pop’s Social, a catering company in South Orange, N.J., that specializes in dirty soda, served an alcoholic drink at an event, something strange happened.
At the event in December, its nonalcoholic offering, a spiced pear-cider seltzer with vanilla and peach syrups, cream, lemon and cold foam, was a hit. The Prosecco-spiked version? Not so much.
“People were more interested in the mocktail than the cocktail,” Ali Greenberg, an owner of the business, said in an interview.
Dirty soda — a customizable blend of soda, flavored syrup, creamer and sometimes fruit, served over pebble ice — has been crossing into the mainstream for years, especially after the cast of “The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives,” the hit reality show that premiered in 2024, frequented Swig, the Utah chain that started it all.
But its reach has gone far beyond the Mormon corridor, and its rise in popularity has dovetailed with an overall decline in U.S. alcohol consumption. “There’s not a lot of Mormon people in our neighborhood,” said Greenberg. “But there are a lot of people who are sober-curious or not drinking.”
The reality show, which follows a group of Mormon influencers in Utah, helped popularize dirty soda beyond the Mountain States and inspired a wave of TikTok videos on the subject. Swig rapidly expanded — growing from 33 locations in Utah and Arizona in 2021 to now more than 150 locations in 16 states — along with other Utah chains, and spawned copycats nationwide.
Dirty soda has joined other Mormon cultural exports, like tradwife influencers, a “Real Housewives” franchise in Salt Lake City and Taylor Frankie Paul, the Bachelorette who wasn’t, that have captivated America.
With the recent rollouts of dirty soda at McDonald’s, Chick-fil-A and Dunkin’ — behold the Dunkin’ Dirty Soda: Pepsi, coffee milk and cold foam — and the appearance on grocery shelves of Dirty Mountain Dew and a coconut-lime Coffee Mate creamer for homemade dirty sodas, we may have reached peak dirty.
The idea for dirty soda came out of a desire for members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which has millions of followers in Utah and surrounding states, to have more options for social drinking, as the church prohibits the consumption of alcohol, hot coffee and hot caffeinated tea.
When Swig introduced dirty soda in 2010, it filled a need, providing a pick-me-up for car-pooling moms and an after-school treat for their kids. It was quickly adopted by many in the community.
“In other cultures, parents go, they pick up their coffee in the morning, and for me and for a lot of my other friends’ parents, it was, ‘Let’s go pick up our dirty soda,’” Whitney Leavitt, a breakout star of “Mormon Wives,” said in an interview.
Leavitt was surprised when her dirty soda order became a recurring question from reporters in recent years. “They were so excited to hear all of the different syrups and creamers that we add to our drinks to make whatever your go-to dirty soda is,” Leavitt said. (Hers is sparkling water with sugar-free pineapple, sugar-free peach and sugar-free vanilla syrups, raspberry purée, a squeeze of lime, and fresh mint if she’s “feeling really fancy.”)
In April, Leavitt became the chief creative and brand officer at Cool Sips, a beverage chain based in New York that sells dirty sodas.
“Mormon Wives” inspired Kaitlyn Sturm, a 26-year-old mother of three from Jackson, Miss., to post recipes for dirty sodas on her TikTok. The one she makes the most contains Coke or Dr Pepper, homemade cherry syrup, a glug of coconut creamer and a packet of True Lime crystallized lime powder, which she combines in a pasta-sauce jar filled with pebble ice. “It kind of has become like a ritual, where I make one for my husband as well, and we have it most evenings,” Sturm said in an interview.
The trend has also hit fast-food menus. The new “crafted soda” menu at McDonald’s is riddled with dirty soda DNA. The Dirty Dr Pepper, with vanilla flavoring and a cold-foam topper, is the chain’s version of what has shaped up to be the universal dirty soda flavor. Since 2024, Sonic, beloved for its porous, soda-absorbing pebble ice, has offered “dirty” drinks — your choice of soda plus coconut syrup, sweet cream and lime.
These drinks might feel new, but there are antecedents in the Italian sodas of the ’90s (fizzy water and a pump of Torani syrup); the Shirley Temple (ginger ale or lemon-lime soda with grenadine and maraschino cherries); and the egg cream, a tonic of seltzer, chocolate syrup and milk. And what is a dirty Dr Pepper with cold foam if not a descendant of the root beer float? “It’s just a soda fountain from 125 years ago,” Kara Nielsen, a food and beverage trend forecaster, said in an interview.
Though Leavitt moved to New York City with her family in December, her dirty soda ritual has remained consistent, with one key difference. “In Utah, we don’t get to walk to dirty soda shops,” Leavitt said. “We have to drive there.”
Annuals include flowers like marigolds and nasturtiums. They grow fast but won’t come back the next spring (though they will drop seeds and possibly propagate). Perennials like lavender and sage will return year after year, but they may take longer to grow. Wildflower and pollinator packets often contain both annual and perennial seeds but are frowned upon by some serious gardeners, because the selection can be haphazard and ill-suited to the area.
It’s a good idea to exercise a little situational awareness. How much rain can you expect? How much sunlight? Dig the earth and feel it between your fingers — is it sandy? Loamy? These are things to keep in mind as you prepare for your journey into horticultural chaos.
“You want to prepare your soil, your site, at least a little bit,” said Deryn Davidson, a sustainable landscape expert at Colorado State University Extension in Longmont, Colo. “Try to get rid of weeds. Make sure the soil is ready to receive seeds.”
Davidson, who has written about chaos gardening, strongly advised covering the seeds with a layer of soil, lest they become bird food. As for watering, that depends on where you live, she added. On the whole, though, the formula is straightforward: “Soil, sun and water is what these seeds need,” Davidson said.
Not everyone is a fan of the trend, or at least the way it has been portrayed on social media. “Nature is not chaos — nature is pattern,” said Robin Wall Kimmerer, a botanist and the author of “Braiding Sweetgrass,” which recommends imbuing modern life with Indigenous wisdom.
“It seems unrealistic,” Kimmerer said of the chaos gardening videos she has watched. The feeling of effortlessness they convey — a common social media effect, almost always the result of deft editing — seems to elide the work that goes into a garden, whether chaotic or not, she suggested.
“I want my garden to be natural and biodiverse,” she said. “That’s a good impulse. I don’t think this technique is going to get you there, but that’s an important impulse.”
Boitnott, the maker of the viral video, offered a simple reason for why chaos gardening has become popular: “It just makes you happy.”
Admission: I suffer from eyestrain. Even right this very second. As a reporter working on a computer more than eight hours most days, my eyes often feel fatigued and itchy by evening.
I’m not alone: More than half of the U.S. population lives with computer vision syndrome, also known as digital eyestrain, and nearly 16.4 million Americans suffer from dry eye syndrome. So I was especially excited to stumble on New Vogue Spa, in the City of Industry, which offers a relaxing, if intriguing, treatment called “Eyeball Care” — something I’d never heard of before at a day spa.
New Vogue Spa is an Asian-style spa with Korean and Chinese influences. The spa’s offerings include massages and body scrubs — I was curious about the “Red Wine Body Scrub” — but I couldn’t help exploring eyeball care, which was much needed after my 50-minute drive from Silver Lake. (The City of Industry is about 30 minutes from downtown L.A. without heavy traffic.)
So it came to be that I found myself lying on a massage table, wearing what looked like protruding diving goggles, with clouds of cool, aromatic steam oozing from both sides of it and engulfing my face. A spindly plastic tube extended from my forehead to the “Eye Spa” machine. Serene spa music, a blend of classical piano and loudly chirping birds, trilled in the background as the machine sloshed and gurgled. It felt like lying, creekside, in a spa robe wrapped in a blanket of chamomile and rosemary-scented fog.
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As my esthetician, Jenny Chen, adjusted the eye mask and added essential oils to the mist, New Vogue manager Lesley Xie explained that the 60-minute, $125 Eyeball Care treatment aims to hydrate and stimulate blood circulation in the eye area, decrease puffiness and dark circles and aid eye fatigue and dry eye syndrome.
“It’s really helpful for overall eye health for people who are on computers for a long time or sleep really late or who are reading a lot,” she said.
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1. The Eyeball Care treatment included a mask filled with cool, aromatic steam to help relieve fatigued eyes. 2. Slippers in the Himalayan Salt Room.
Xie said that eyeball care treatments are common in China. When she was growing up in Guangdong in Southern China, elementary school students were given a break every afternoon to perform “eye exercises,” which involved gently massaging pressure points around their eye areas, for 5-10 minutes.
“It released eye stress because we studied from eight o’clock in the morning until almost noon time,” she said. “It was a break for our eyes to prevent nearsightedness and tired eyes.”
New Vogue Spa’s treatment was supremely relaxing from the onset — part Head Spa, part facial, part eye care. Chen began by massaging my scalp for about 10 minutes, as I tried not to fall asleep.
Next she cleaned my face, applied massage cream and gently massaged my face and eye area, manipulating the outer corners of my eye sockets as well as under my brow bones and on my temples. She was precise and firm but careful — as she pressed on the outside corner of my eye, I felt tension draining down the side of my cheek and neck.
Esthetician Jenny Chen conducts “Golden Eye therapy” on reporter Deborah Vankin.
Xie said the massage is based on traditional Chinese medicine, focusing on stimulating acupressure points around the eyes.
“Gentle massage of these areas is believed to help promote blood circulation, relax the muscles responsible for focusing and relieve visual fatigue,” she said. “While it’s not a medical treatment for vision conditions, it’s widely used as a preventative and restorative method.”
The massage was followed by “Golden Eye therapy,” during which Chen used an electronic device on my face with a metal roller ball on it. It uses “ultrasonic vibration technology,” Xie said, to help the skin absorb the applied moisturizing cream and combat eye puffiness.
The main event was the “cooling steam therapy,” which Xie said was meant to be calming and refreshing and help relieve tired eyes. Chen fitted me with what looked like an enormous diving mask that quickly filled with cool, hydrating mist — I felt droplets of water dripping from my eyes and down my cheeks. The Eye Spa machine uses a “cold mist atomization process,” Xie said, “that disperses micro-particles of moisture combined with soothing essential oils.”
At the end of my treatment, Chen gave me under-eye gel pad masks, for added hydration, while conducting one last head massage. She applied moisturizing eye cream, face cream and sunscreen before sending me off.
Dr. Kristina Voss, an ophthalmologist with Keck Medicine of USC, was enthusiastic about the Eyeball Care treatment.
“It sounds wonderful. Anything that makes you feel good, I generally support,” she said. “It sounds safe because they’re not putting pressure on the eye. Direct pressure on the eyeball [is dangerous]. And I’d be nervous if they were putting something in the eye, but they’re not. Steam, or even cool condensation from a humidifier, is effective for dry eye. Massaging pressure points probably doesn’t treat dry eye, but could potentially treat eyestrain or tension headaches that can be interpreted as eyestrain.”
Los Angeles Times features writer Deborah Vankin inspects her eyeballs after her treatment.
Temporary relief aside, however, Voss warned that the treatment is not a replacement for seeing a doctor if a condition is ongoing.
“It’s relaxing and complementary to a doctor’s dry eye treatments — like medicated drops or in-office treatments — but it’s not a simple fix or cure all,” she said. “Ongoing doctor’s care would be important.”
After my treatment, I was invited to linger in the co-ed Himalayan Salt Room and Red Clay Room or woman-only spa area, complete with a warm soaking tub, lounge area and treatment rooms for body scrubs. (I skipped the adjacent New Vogue MedSpa, where you can get botox, dermal filler or microneedling treatments.)
Guests are also treated to a cup of homemade snow fungus tea (made from tremella mushrooms) with a single jujube, or red, date, floating inside. New Vogue makes a fresh batch every morning for guests, simmering the collagen-rich drink so long it becomes somewhat gelatinous.
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1. The Himalayan Salt Room. 2. The co-ed lounge area. 3. The Red Clay Room.
“Snow fungus focuses on deep hydration and skin plumping, while red dates support circulation and a healthy glow,” Xie said, calling the concoction “a warm bowl of snow fungus and red date soup.”
I can’t speak to the medicinal benefits of snow fungus tea. But after a glass of the warm, woody-tasting drink — together with the hour-long tension-taming eye treatment — I saw the world in a whole new way while walking out the door: clearly, from a relaxed perspective and with the bigger picture in focus.
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