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L.A. Affairs: We had a dreamy missed connection. How do I find you again?

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L.A. Affairs: We had a dreamy missed connection. How do I find you again?

The bar was almost full when I walked into the restaurant. The hostess greeted me with a smile, a slicked-back perfect ponytail and a red lip to finish her look. As she asked if I needed a table, I spotted a man at the bar in a light red Patagonia puffer jacket with two seats open on either side of him. I also noticed a napkin on his plate indicating he was finished. I told the hostess I thought I had found a spot.

I was meeting my friend and neighbor, Ashley, for drinks. Her brother had just flown in from Miami for the holiday break, and R+D Kitchen (nicknamed Rich + Divorced) was one of our favorite spots for a bite and an adult bevvy.

“Is this seat taken?” I asked.

“No, I’m just finishing up,” the man said.

“Oh, thank you so much. I’m meeting a few friends here, and you know how hard it is to get three seats together,” I said a little nervously.

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He laughed and looked down at my purse, which I had hung under the bar with a wrapped present sticking out. “I do. Is that a gift for one of your friends?” he asked.

“It is,” I said with a smile.

“What is it?”

“It’s so cheesy. Do you know that movie ‘National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation’?’”

He nodded.

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“Well, it’s a sweatshirt that says ‘It’s a Beaut Clark.’ There were a bunch of other great ones, like ‘Sh—er was full.’ That movie has such great one-liners.”

Then I immediately regretted swearing because I suddenly realized how attractive he was. He appeared to be fit and seemed tall even though he was seated. He had a warm smile and a shaved head. He seemed to be wearing cream-colored sweatpants, which perfectly completed his casual look.

There also was a wit about him that sparked my interest, and sitting there, it felt so comfortable and magnetic, as if we’d laughed together before.

Then he gave me a look of surprise that I had just cursed, but it also seemed as if he was intrigued enough to chat more.

“How did you find this gift?” he asked with a smirk.

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I laughed and said, “Oh, it was served to me on Instagram.”

We both laughed.

He then signed his check, gathered his things, told me to have a happy holiday and left the bar.

“But wait,” I wanted to say.

A few minutes later, my friends arrived, and we ended up finding a place at the other end of the bar by the fireplace. My friends ordered wine, and I ordered an Aperol spritz . We browsed the menu and caught up a bit.

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I started up a conversation with the bartender.

“Hey, you know this place is nicknamed Rich + Divorced, right?” I said. “You guys should do some sort of dating introduction here. It would be so fun. … I have no idea how you’d do it, but did you see that guy I was talking to at the other end? Like that would’ve been a perfect match! I could somehow message him on an app or the bartender could play matchmaker. Is he a regular?”

I was in full investigative mode with the bartender, wanting to know more about the handsome man.

“He’s definitely a regular,” he said. “I see him maybe once a month or two but I don’t work that often. So he may come in more.”

“Interesting. I know this is completely inappropriate and please tell me if you can’t do this or are uncomfortable,” I said. “But could you look through the credit card slips and see if maybe you can find a name? I’d be so grateful.”

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We look at each other. “And if not, no worries,” I said. “I know it’s probably against protocol, and you might get in trouble. And I wouldn’t want that. But I just have to ask.”

He laughed and grabbed the receipts and started thumbing through them.

“Oh, thank you so much!” I said.

“Eh, here it is,” the bartender said. “So sorry. He paid with Apple Pay, so there’s no trace of his name on the bill.”

Ten minutes later, I felt a tap on my shoulder, and it was the handsome guy again. He smiled and said “Merry Christmas.” Then he handed me a sealed card still in the plastic envelope from Paper Source.

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The front read “Sh—er’s Full,” and the card had a simple illustration of that scene from the movie .

I had no idea what to say. He smiled again and walked out. I don’t remember exactly what happened because I was kind of frozen in surprise.

My friend Ashley said that Mr. Handsome must have written his name or number inside. “Open it!” she said.

She took the card from my hand. It was sealed. I took it back from her and opened it. It was blank. There was nothing inside. “Should I run after him?” I said.

“Yes!” Ashley said.

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I got up from the bar and ran outside.

But it was quiet. I looked both ways, up and down the street. I didn’t see him anywhere.

I walked back inside the restaurant and chalked it up to a weird Christmas happenstance. But just in case it wasn’t, I left my number with the bartender and the rest to fate.

The author is a dog mom and executive producer living in Los Angeles. She is on Instagram: @courtcleavs

L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.

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Baz Luhrmann will make you fall in love with Elvis Presley

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Baz Luhrmann will make you fall in love with Elvis Presley

Elvis Presley in Las Vegas in Aug. 1970.

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“You are my favorite customer,” Baz Luhrmann tells me on a recent Zoom call from the sunny Chateau Marmont in Hollywood. The director is on a worldwide blitz to promote his new film, EPiC: Elvis Presley in Concert — which opens wide this week — and he says this, not to flatter me, but because I’ve just called his film a miracle.

See, I’ve never cared a lick about Elvis Presley, who would have turned 91 in January, had he not died in 1977 at the age of 42. Never had an inkling to listen to his music, never seen any of his films, never been interested in researching his life or work. For this millennial, Presley was a fossilized, mummified relic from prehistory — like a woolly mammoth stuck in the La Brea Tar Pits — and I was mostly indifferent about seeing 1970s concert footage when I sat down for an early IMAX screening of EPiC.

By the end of its rollicking, exhilarating 90 minutes, I turned to my wife and said, “I think I’m in love with Elvis Presley.”

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“I’m not trying to sell Elvis,” Luhrmann clarifies. “But I do think that the most gratifying thing is when someone like you has the experience you’ve had.”

Elvis made much more of an imprint on a young Luhrmann; he watched the King’s movies while growing up in New South Wales, Australia in the 1960s, and he stepped to 1972’s “Burning Love” as a young ballroom dancer. But then, like so many others, he left Elvis behind. As a teenager, “I was more Bowie and, you know, new wave and Elton and all those kinds of musical icons,” he says. “I became a big opera buff.”

Luhrmann only returned to the King when he decided to make a movie that would take a sweeping look at America in the 1950s, ’60s, and ’70s — which became his 2022 dramatized feature, Elvis, starring Austin Butler. That film, told in the bedazzled, kaleidoscopic style that Luhrmann is famous for, cast Presley as a tragic figure; it was framed and narrated by Presley’s notorious manager, Colonel Tom Parker, portrayed by a conniving and heavily made-up Tom Hanks. The dark clouds of business exploitation, the perils of fame, and an early demise hang over the singer’s heady rise and fall.

It was a divisive movie. Some praised Butler’s transformative performance and the director’s ravishing style; others experienced it as a nauseating 2.5-hour trailer. Reviewing it for Fresh Air, Justin Chang said that “Luhrmann’s flair for spectacle tends to overwhelm his basic story sense,” and found the framing device around Col. Parker (and Hanks’ “uncharacteristically grating” acting) to be a fatal flaw.

Personally, I thought it was the greatest thing Luhrmann had ever made, a perfect match between subject and filmmaker. It reminded me of Oliver Stone’s breathless, Shakespearean tragedy about Richard Nixon (1995’s Nixon), itself an underrated masterpiece. Yet somehow, even for me, it failed to light a fire of interest in Presley himself — and by design, I now realize after seeing EPiC, it omitted at least one major aspect of Elvis’ appeal: the man was charmingly, endearingly funny.

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As seen in Luhrmann’s new documentary, on stage, in the midst of a serious song, Elvis will pull a face, or ad lib a line about his suit being too tight to get on his knees, or sing for a while with a bra (which has been flung from the audience) draped over his head. He’s constantly laughing and ribbing and keeping his musicians, and himself, entertained. If Elvis was a tragedy, EPiC is a romantic comedy — and Presley’s seduction of us, the audience, is utterly irresistible.

Unearthing old concert footage 

It was in the process of making Elvis that Luhrmann discovered dozens of long-rumored concert footage tapes in a Kansas salt mine, where Warner Bros. stores some of their film archives. Working with Peter Jackson’s team at the post-production facility Park Road Post, who did the miraculous restoration of Beatles rehearsal footage for Jackson’s 2021 Disney+ series, Get Back, they burnished 50-plus hours of 55-year-old celluloid into an eye-popping sheen with enough visual fidelity to fill an IMAX screen. In doing so, they resurrected a woolly mammoth. The film — which is a creative amalgamation of takes from rehearsals and concerts that span from 1970 to 1972 — places the viewer so close to the action that we can viscerally feel the thumping of the bass and almost sense that we’ll get flecked with the sweat dripping off Presley’s face.

This footage was originally shot for the 1970 concert film Elvis: That’s The Way It Is, and its 1972 sequel, Elvis on Tour, which explains why these concerts were shot like a Hollywood feature: wide shots on anamorphic 35mm and with giant, ultra-bright Klieg lights — which, Luhrmann explains, “are really disturbing. So [Elvis] was very apologetic to the audience, because the audience felt a bit more self conscious than they would have been at a normal show. They were actually making a movie, they weren’t just shooting a concert.”

Luhrmann chose to leave in many shots where camera operators can be seen running around with their 16mm cameras for close-ups, “like they’re in the Vietnam War trying to get the best angles,” because we live in an era where we’re used to seeing cameras everywhere and Luhrmann felt none of the original directors’ concern about breaking the illusion. Those extreme close-ups, which were achieved by operators doing math and manually pulling focus, allow us to see even the pores on Presley’s skin — now projected onto a screen the size of two buildings.

The sweat that comes out of those pores is practically a character in the film. Luhrmann marvels at how much Presley gave in every single rehearsal and every single concert performance. Beyond the fact that “he must have superhuman strength,” Luhrmann says, “He becomes the music. He doesn’t mark stuff. He just becomes the music, and then no one knows what he’s going to do. The band do not know what he’s going to do, so they have to keep their eyes on him all the time. They don’t know how many rounds he’s going to do in ‘Suspicious Minds.’ You know, he conducts them with his entire being — and that’s what makes him unique.”

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Elvis Presley in Las Vegas in Aug. 1970.

Elvis Presley in Las Vegas in Aug. 1970.

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It’s not the only thing. The revivified concerts in EPiC are a potent argument that Elvis wasn’t just a superior live performer to the Beatles (who supplanted him as the kings of pop culture in the 1960s), but possibly the greatest live performer of all time. His sensual, magmatic charisma on stage, the way he conducts the large band and choir, the control he has over that godlike gospel voice, and the sorcerer’s power he has to hold an entire audience in the palm of his hands (and often to kiss many of its women on the lips) all come across with stunning, electrifying urgency.

Shaking off the rust and building a “dreamscape” 

The fact that, on top of it all, he is effortlessly funny and goofy is, in Luhrmann’s mind, essential to the magic of Elvis. While researching for Elvis, he came to appreciate how insecure Presley was as a kid — growing up as the only white boy in a poor Black neighborhood, and seeing his father thrown into jail for passing a bad check. “Inside, he felt very less-than,” says Luhrmann, “but he grows up into a physical Greek god. I mean, we’ve forgotten how beautiful he was. You see it in the movie; he is a beautiful looking human being. And then he moves. And he doesn’t learn dance steps — he just manifests that movement. And then he’s got the voice of Orpheus, and he can take a song like ‘Bridge Over Troubled Water’ and make it into a gospel power ballad.

“So he’s like a spiritual being. And I think he’s imposing. So the goofiness, the humor is about disarming people, making them get past the image — like he says — and see the man. That’s my own theory.”

Elvis has often been second-classed in the annals of American music because he didn’t write his own songs, but Luhrmann insists that interpretation is its own invaluable art form. “Orpheus interpreted the music as well,” the director says.

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In this way — as in their shared maximalist, cape-and-rhinestones style — Luhrmann and Elvis are a match made in Graceland. Whether he’s remixing Shakespeare as a ’90s punk music video in Romeo + Juliet or adding hip-hop beats to The Great Gatsby, Luhrmann is an artist who loves to take what was vibrantly, shockingly new in another century and make it so again.

Elvis Presley in Las Vegas in Aug. 1970.

Elvis Presley in Las Vegas in Aug. 1970.

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Luhrmann says he likes to take classic work and “shake off the rust and go, Well, when it was written, it wasn’t classical. When it was created, it was pop, it was modern, it was in the moment. That’s what I try and do.”

To that end, he conceived EPiC as “an imagined concert,” liberally building sequences from various nights, sometimes inserting rehearsal takes into a stage performance (ecstatically so in the song “Polk Salad Annie”), and adding new musical layers to some of the songs. Working with his music producer, Jamieson Shaw, he backed the King’s vocals on “Oh Happy Day” with a new recording of a Black gospel choir in Nashville. “So that’s an imaginative leap,” says Luhrmann. “It’s kind of a dreamscape.”

On some tracks, like “Burning Love,” new string arrangements give the live performances extra verve and cinematic depth. Luhrmann and his music team also radically remixed multiple Elvis songs into a new number, “A Change of Reality,” which has the King repeatedly asking “Do you miss me?” over a buzzing bass line and a syncopated beat.

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I didn’t miss Elvis before I saw EPiC — but after seeing the film twice now, I truly do.

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