Lifestyle
As we kissed, I realized a surprising truth about my date. We had history
I didn’t think anyone would take my Hinge prompt seriously. My ideal first date is … hot yoga. The prompt was partly a joke, written by a friend because I couldn’t figure out what to write. If anything, I figured the prompt would explain the series of yoga pictures scattered across my profile, proving to potential suitors that I wasn’t simply a yoga poser like most Angelenos who view vinyasa as just another workout trend.
I was a “serious yogi,” and to date me would mean respecting my daily practice and being OK with the 3,000 small Ganesha statues tucked into every crevice of my apartment.
Still, I was surprised and slightly amused when Noah asked, in all seriousness, if I would like to go to a yoga class with him and then get dinner afterward. In my effort to go on as many dates as possible as quickly as possible, I said yes, of course. I was a couple of months removed from an eight-year relationship that ended badly. I had convinced myself it would take 100 bad first dates before I found anyone remotely interesting. At least a yoga date for date No. 14 would be slightly more exciting than recounting life stories over drinks at the local bar.
In the texting convo that followed planning our date, Noah and I exchanged music tastes. He is a raver and loves EDM, and I am a Swiftie who also, as it turned out, loves EDM. We learned we attended Chapman University at the same time. We both worked on the Fox lot during the same years. And we share an appreciation for tofu, which he called a “gift from the heavens,” making my vegan heart skip a beat.
Noah and I met at a popular hot yoga studio in Hollywood for our one-hour Bikram-vinyasa fusion date. There was something familiar about him that I initially attributed to having crossed paths in college at some point. In the moments before class, we unloaded our gym bags and shoes into separate lockers outside of the yoga room while exchanging hellos that I expected to be awkward but somehow felt easy and unforced. My interest piqued.
In the yoga room, we set up our mats in the second row. As the class started and the instructor dimmed the lights to an orange glow, it hit me that hot yoga might be a horrible first date idea. We were two strangers, our yoga mats a little too close together, already sweating profusely as the yoga teacher instructed us into sun salutations. I couldn’t decide whether to focus on the class, the poses and keeping my breath slow or if I should try to continuously look cute since this was a date. I kept accidentally catching Noah’s eye in the mirror, and through facial expressions, tried to communicate that I was having fun and in no way subtly judging his yoga practice.
At some point during class, Noah slipped his shirt off and, even through my sweat-filled gaze, I caught a glimpse of his six-pack in the mirror. He met my eyes right as I started to blush, and I looked away fast, embarrassed at having been caught staring. The room suddenly felt hotter and more humid than before. I struggled to steady my breath. Yes, this was definitely a horrible yet interesting first date idea.
The teacher cued us onto our bellies for a backbend sequence. My eyes met Noah’s in the mirror again. This time I turned to look at him, and he smiled a surprisingly familiar smile that meant, “I know this is weird, but I’m having fun too.”
“That was a nice class,” Noah said once our hour was up and we were back in the air-conditioned studio lobby. “It’s one way to see your date sweaty and half-naked.”
I laughed in agreement as we parted ways to shower and change for dinner.
We met again at Cafe Gratitude on Larchmont Boulevard and ordered dishes called “I Am Grateful” and “I Am Remarkable” while recounting the class from our perspectives. He told me about his interest in yoga, how he only recently began practicing as a way to help with mobility. I told him yoga keeps me grounded. I showed off the book I kept in my purse, a story about living Jewishly in modern times, which led to a discussion of how we both grew up Jewish on opposite sides of the country. I liked how neither of us ordered a drink with dinner, choosing water over alcohol as the conversation remained interesting and focused. I liked how he was nice to the server and that his eye contact put me at ease. I liked how after paying the check, he walked me to my car and asked if he could kiss me.
I nodded, and he closed the distance between us. We kissed, and with it came a memory: Freshman year of college, orientation week or shortly afterward, I was at a football party with the girl who would soon be my sorority big. I was drunk and chatty and looking to make friends. I started talking to a freshman boy, and that conversation soon turned to making out, the way most drunken college flirting did back then.
My eyes opened, I pulled away from the kiss. “Have we done this before?” I asked.
Noah blushed then nodded softly.
“Freshman year, I think,” he said, “at a party.”
“A football party?”
“Yes!” He laughed, and I did too.
We kissed again. It was the type of kiss you don’t forget. The type that makes sense.
“Well, we have to do this again,” he concluded.
We said good night. He texted me a song to listen to. I played it in the car on repeat until I arrived home.
Until Noah, I thought an invisible string was only the name of a Taylor Swift song. Now, I know better.
The author is a community builder, writer and yoga teacher. She lives in Echo Park. She’s on Instagram: @allegramarcelle.
L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.
Lifestyle
Unmistakable Love of Austin, the Texas Longhorns and Each Other
Around July 4, Mena started the countdown to football season.
Stowell joined him at sports bars to watch Longhorns teams, and managed to stick it out at an early-season Texas Longhorns home football game in 105-degree heat until halftime, where he met Mena’s cousins, who had season tickets.
“It showed me willingness,” Mena said, who didn’t miss any football “away games” in November 2021 when they stayed in a Cancun villa with a satellite dish for five days with friends.
In January 2022, Mena hosted a 40th birthday party for Stowell at the Golden Goose bar in Austin, and by the end of the year, they bought a fixer-upper — a one-story bungalow just a 10-minute walk to the university’s football stadium.
“His love of sports knows no bounds,” said Stowell, with memorabilia, posters and jerseys everywhere in his house. “I had to then take the reins,” with a more subtle nod to the Longhorns. “The front door is burnt orange.”
During the renovation, in August 2023, they took a trip to the Azores and Portugal, where Stowell proposed with a gray crushed diamond band as they sat on bar stools at Pavilhão Chinês, a quirky, hidden bar in Lisbon where servers wear tuxedos.
“After the renovation is done, do you want to get married?” Stowell asked Mena pragmatically.
On April 24, Elana M. Schulman, a friend of the couple who became a Universal Life minister for the event, officiated the 25-minute ceremony at Assembly Hall, an events space in Austin. Their 180 guests got to choose Austin murals as backdrops for photo booth snapshots, enjoyed local Tito’s vodka and Lalo tequila margaritas, and Zed’s New Zealand-style ice cream and a taco truck.
Lifestyle
The case for monogramming everything you own and love
Amanda wears writer’s monogrammed Art Lewin bespoke button down shirt, Louis Vuitton socks, duffel and luggage, Christian Dior jacket, Manolo Blahnik Mary Jane heels, DE LA GOLD necklace, rings and bracelets.
This story is part of Image’s April’s Thresholds issue, a tour of L.A. architecture as it’s actually experienced.
The monogram is not something that instantly screams “Los Angeles,” though the iconic Dodgers logo — interlocking white letters on a blue hat — is one of the most memorable monograms in the world. A combination of letters signifying a person or brand feels Old World rather than the shiny new feeling that defines our casual, everyday West Coast lifestyle. A lifestyle unburned by history and more connected to the mundane and the tangible. Monograms have been around for centuries, dating all the way back to ancient Greece. They became popular symbols of royalty, and in more recent times, were adopted by the upper class for use on stationery, clothing and accessories. They’re symbols of the elite, of status and success. Monograms are luxury typed and typified. Perhaps that’s why so many luxury fashion houses have employed monograms to build their aesthetic identity. None more so than Louis Vuitton, which is celebrating the 130th anniversary of its LV logo. But why do brands and individuals alike feel so compelled to write their names on anything and everything?
The LV monogram was designed in 1896 by Georges Vuitton, the offspring of the brand’s namesake founder. The logo was created in the style of Japanese family crests, with quatrefoils embellishments and stylized flowers. It found its way onto the sumptuous luggage that became the house’s trademark. It’s been tweaked and freshened up a few times since, and became a signature of the brand’s first forays into ready-to-wear apparel under the guidance of Marc Jacobs. Unlike other luxury brands that have toyed with new logos and typefaces in the last decade, the LV monogram has carried down through the various changes in leadership at Vuitton. The latest collection from men’s creative director Pharrell Williams continues to lean heavily into that visual identity on bags, puffer jackets and sunglasses.
Monogrammed Art Lewin bespoke button down shirt, Louis Vuitton jacket, pants and bag, DE LA GOLD necklace, rings and bracelets.
It’s not hard to see why Vuitton has continued to rely on the LV emblem for its branding. Monograms are simple to understand. They communicate easily, and more literally than an abstract symbol like Nike’s Swoosh or Adidas’ Three Stripes. It’s part of why I put my initials on items like my wallet, the cuffs of my bespoke shirts, my sleepwear and my towels. It’s a way to signify ownership, but also a sense of clear identity. These objects are mine, and this is who I am.
Not everyone is compelled to spend the extra money on a monogram for their jammies, but the impulse comes from the early days of life. When your parents shuttle you off to school for the first time, practically everything you own has your name written on it — your T-shirts, pants, lunch box and water bottle. The cubby hole where your backpack (which also has your name on it) has a label to remind you which one is yours. We teach the idea of ownership to children early. This belongs to me. It’s the fundamental principle of our society. I own this. And what you own eventually defines you. The kind of car you drive, the music you listen to, the furniture you sit on. It’s impossible to separate objects from meaning because meaning in our modern world comes from objects, whether we support that notion or not.
Memories, associations and context all go into assigning value and meaning to an object. If an old girlfriend buys you a set of cocktail glasses from a flea market, those glasses will always evoke thoughts of that person. If you ordered Taco Bell at a drive-thru the day a loved one died, unfortunately, that might ruin Taco Bell for you forever. By monogramming something, the first thing you think about is you. Maybe that sounds a bit narcissistic, and I certainly have been accused of such things once or twice (sorry, I’m a writer, this is just part of it), but it’s never been more important to assert your sense of personhood and independence.
Derek Rose monogrammed pajama shirt, Louis Vuitton belted coat, Gap tank top, Nordstrom underwear, De La Gold necklace, rings and bracelets, Swedish Stockings tights.
Technology and social media and artificial intelligence have turned us into widgets or worse, vessels for “engagement.” Even if social media affords you the opportunity to put a picture of yourself and your name on your account, you’re still liable to be drowned out by the crashing wave of millions of other people doing the exact same thing. And these worlds aren’t even real, just ones and zeros merged to form a network of communication that sometimes feels like incoherent gibberish.
Monograms are ancient. They’re tangible. They can and do mean something powerful. After 130 years, the Louis Vuitton monogram still carries weight, hearkening back to an era of remarkable craftsmanship. Instead of just looking at it like a logo that’s there to adorn a sweatshirt or a water bottle, think about what it stood for at the start — the labor and artistry that built an enduring legacy. Symbols lose their value if we forget where they came from, if we lose connection with their primordial origin.
If you step into a Louis Vuitton store today, the LV monogram is omnipresent, the symbol of a powerful luxury house. But it also stands for the man who created the company, the family that helped it grow, and the craftsmanship that brought it to market. It was built by hand, with care and attention. That’s what a monogram can do. It reminds us that a human being exists, or in the case of Louis Vuitton, existed. Not just a multinational conglomerate. A person.
I don’t monogram my clothes for myself, even if it seems like it from the outside. I do it for my son, who will have nothing left of me but memories one day — memories that live inside objects. My pajamas. My towels. My shirts. My legacy. He’ll be able to wear those clothes, look at the initials on them, and say, “These were my dad’s. And I loved him.”
Photography by Brandon Kaipo Moningka
Styling by Christine Garcia
Model Amanda Sebastian
Visual Direction Jess Aquino de Jesus
Fashion Direction Keyla Marquez
Production Cecilia Alvarez Blackwell
Photography Assistant Matchi Cervantes
Location DE LA GOLD showroom
Lifestyle
A Fashion Revolution at the Met
Fashion has always sat uncomfortably in the great art institutions of the West, the question of whether it belonged under the same roof as masterworks and heroic marbles a subject of perennial debate. After all, these creations weren’t hung on a wall or put on a pedestal; they were (cue dismissive sniff) worn. They may have been a part of pop culture, but could they really be classed with high culture?
In London and Paris the answer was to relegate dress to separate museums of decorative arts — the Victoria & Albert and Musée des Arts Décoratifs. And in New York, while the Metropolitan Museum of Art may have swallowed its pride in 1946 and deigned to accept the clothes, it put the new fashion department in … the basement. Talk about a metaphor for museum hierarchies.
This week, however, the Condé M. Nast galleries, a 12,000-square-foot permanent space, is being unveiled for the Costume Institute. The galleries have replaced the former museum gift shop, just to the right of the information desk in the Great Hall. Rather than being hidden below ground, the fashion department is now the first thing people see when they enter the museum.
Shh. Listen. Hear that? It is the sound of 80 years of argument ending.
And it is a reflection of the simple fact that it is now fashion that gets people through the doors of these august — some might say old — institutions. It’s the thing everyone can relate to and comfortably opine on, unlike, say, de Kooning, because, hey, everyone wears clothes.
If in doubt, simply consider that of the 10 most-visited Met exhibitions in modern history, half of them were Costume Institute exhibitions. No other department is represented more than once. Or consider “Costume Art,” the exhibition that opens the new space.
This year’s fashion blockbuster — the one celebrated by the Met Gala on Monday night — “Costume Art” both acknowledges fashion’s role as the new entry point to the museum and makes the case for why the change is long overdue. It’s as if the exhibition were holding out its hand and saying to all who enter, “Hello, let me be your guide to the treasures we have throughout this place.”
The show suggests that fashion — or “the dressed body” — is the essential connective tissue of the 17 different departments and 19 collecting areas of the Met, the one element present in every discipline, no matter what century or art form is under discussion. It does this by pairing approximately 200 garments and accessories with 200 pieces of art borrowed from across the museum’s six miles of galleries.
You see the connection from the moment you enter the soaring new space, through an anteroom just off the Great Hall, dedicated to what is now termed “naked dressing.” Think Dilara Findikoglu’s 2023 sheer dress with strategically placed coils of hair, like Lady Godiva fashion cosplay, paired with an 18th century Venetian bronze nude, the hands strategically placed just like the hair. That’s one way to hook ‘em.
The Museums Special Section
It’s no accident that the entry also includes a double-sided vitrine that houses four mannequins. Two of them face outward toward the grand staircase and wear sheer body stockings, one by Vivienne Westwood and one by Andrea Adamo, each with a silver fig leaf over their nether regions. Andrew Bolton, the Costume Institute’s curator in charge, has never been afraid of playing to the crowd.
Created by Miriam Peterson and Nathan Rich of the architecture firm Peterson Rich, which also designed the exhibition, the galleries have been conceived to fit seamlessly into the existing semiology of the museum. They are floored in white granite, replete with classic pedestals and platforms, and bathed in a soft glow (since fabric is too fragile to be exposed to daylight, this has been created by recessed uplighting). It’s as if the new galleries had always been there; as if fashion had always belonged.
Rather than dress up the exhibition with fancy scenography, or guest film directors as Bolton has often done in the past, the space allows the interplay between fashion and the rest of the galleries to sit front and center. It is, after all, a relatively straightforward idea: an Issey Miyake molded gold breastplate and a mini-me Etruscan cuirass! A Fortuny pleated Delphos gown and a Greek terra-cotta vase featuring a figure in a pleated gown! A Rei Kawakubo for Comme des Garçons armless felted construction and a stone Henry Moore with the exact same curves.
And really, it’s hard to argue with the connection between Van Gogh’s “Irises” and the Yves Saint Laurent jacket that reproduced that painting in sequins, or the Loewe shirt by Jonathan Anderson that did the same on a feather-festooned couture version of a concert tee.
But such banal relationships are actually few and far between in the show, which is after something deeper and more complicated. There is, thankfully, no Mondrian “Broadway Boogie Woogie” with matching dresses in the exhibition; no Warhol soup cans and Warhol soup can shifts.
Warhol is represented, natch, but by a Richard Avedon portrait of the artist’s bullet-scarred torso, juxtaposed against a Coperni dress, its slashes resected with silver spirals. Even those Van Gogh irises turn out to be linked not just by flowers, but by the mental health struggles of the men who made the works, the way both the designer Chet Lo’s gowns covered in little knit spikes and Picasso’s “The Blind Man’s Meal” reflect the importance of tactile understanding.
Indeed, the organizing principle of the show, rather than chronology, is the body itself: both the kinds of bodies that distinguish us, and the bodily experiences we share. And that is the product of a fairly radical rethinking of how fashion relates to art.
For decades, the justifications for considering fashion as an art form involved denaturing it, separating it from its practical purpose and corporeal reality, and focusing instead on its textile value — embroidery, beading, decoration — or its construction. With this show, Bolton is slyly subverting that idea, suggesting instead that it is fashion’s dependence on the body itself that makes it central to any and all art practices: That the real connective issue between fashion and art is the way in which both are used to challenge and shape perception — of the body, of beauty; of who we are and how we see. Understanding the one helps to understand the other.
That’s why the clothes in this exhibition often sit atop the art, a subtle upending of the traditional status quo that speaks to both Bolton’s thesis and the department’s new status. It’s also why the exhibit layout serves to guide you through a maze of bodily types in its two main galleries, the Thom Browne gallery, and the Michael Kors and Lance Le Pere gallery. Among them are the classical body, the corpulent body, the disabled body, the pregnant body, the inscribed body, the anatomical body and the mortal body.
(The terminology, the product of consultation with different interest groups, can be a little abstruse, but the taxonomy has led to one real change: the creation of mannequins beyond the unrealistically thin and sylphlike.)
You don’t have to get any of this to enjoy the show, of course. It may be less magical than some Costume Institute shows such as 2011’s “Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty,” 2018’s “Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination,” and even last year’s “Superfine: Tailoring Black Style.” But it is delightful to happen upon an unexpected treasure, such as a miniature Egyptian Omphale figure that seems to glow from within, or Fred Tomaselli’s 1992 work “Behind Your Eyes,” a life-size male nude with a body built out of pills that the Met acquired in 2019 but that has never been shown. Or, for that matter, to discover the beauty in the blood red venous structures of a Robert Wun gown, like a flayed dress.
The fashion masters (Worth, Vionnet, Kawakubo and so on) are all here, sure, like the old masters, but so are many more names most people will not know. As a sign of what sort of role fashion is going to play in the Met going forward, “Costume Art” is a clear statement of intent.
The last room in the exhibition acts as a bookend to the first, focusing not on nudity, but on skin itself before disgorging visitors into the Byzantine galleries. Anders Bergstrom’s wrenching “Brown Bag Test,” which wrestles with early-20th-century racism and the way skin tones were used for discrimination, is there, along with Christian Louboutin’s set of “Hot Chick” stiletto shoes in eight different shades of nude. Both are set against the backdrop of the original brick and concrete outer wall of the Met, which was hidden when the Great Hall and grand entry staircase were added in 1902.
The wall was uncovered when the gift shop was demolished, and it has been left in its original state, as if to remind you that it, too, has been here all along. It’s just that, like the foregrounding of fashion in art, it took this long for everyone to realize it. Now that they have, there is room for an even more interesting question: What’s next?
Cinematography by Jensen Gore.
Costume Art
Members Preview, May 5, 7-9; opens May 10 — Jan. 10, 2027, Metropolitan Museum of Art, 1000 Fifth Ave., 212-535-7710; metmuseum.org.
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