Lifestyle

Actually, compartmentalizing can be good for you

Published

2 years ago

February 14, 2024

Actually, compartmentalizing can be good for you

Lynn Bufka isn’t sure how she’s going to get through the next nine months.

The licensed psychologist, stress expert and spokesperson for the American Psychological Assn. usually watches the news on TV each morning. But with a contentious presidential election coming up, lately she’s been reluctant to pick up the remote.

“I don’t want to hear anything about the election and it’s only January,” she said in an interview last month. “Even as a psychologist I’m trying to think through how best to manage it.”

Bufka doesn’t want to stick her head under a rock, but she also can’t allow herself to become engulfed in worry about what will happen if her candidate loses. She has a job to do, relationships to maintain and other life responsibilities that demand her attention.

In especially uncertain moments such as these, when her own patients are consumed with anxiety, Bufka recommends compartmentalization — separating different parts of one’s mental and emotional experience.

As questions about our political, environmental and technological future loom, experts say that compartmentalizing can be a useful tool to help us regulate our emotions and face challenges without falling apart. Yes, it’s a defense mechanism that sometimes gets a bad rap, said Gloria Mark, a retired professor of informatics at UC Irvine — but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad for you. “It’s a function that helps us navigate through our days without being burdened by all the stress,” she said.

While it’s possible to over-compartmentalize and, in turn, numb your feelings, taking occasional breaks from intense emotions is an essential component of mental health. We all instinctively do it: We hold back tears to answer an important work call, mute our anger to communicate diplomatically with our partner or push down our anxiety to read a bedtime story to our toddler. In the past decade or so, we as a society may even have developed an increased awareness of this self-preservation technique; Google searches for compartmentalization have been steadily increasing since 2004.

A dirty word

Dr. Tara Swart, a neuroscientist and professor at MIT Sloan School of Management, recognizes that the term “compartmentalizing” is loaded. “It gives you the impression that you can take something that is worrying you and lock it in a box and not think about it,” she said. “Actually, no one can do that.”

Instead, Swart says, compartmentalizing can be both good and bad for you. Healthy compartmentalization involves regulating your emotions while unhealthy compartmentalizing means repressing them.

At its most useful, compartmentalization is the ability to acknowledge challenges in your personal circumstances or current events, and make a conscious decision to not allow those things to take over your thoughts and emotions, she said. But that doesn’t mean shutting out the world.

“The opposite would be to say, ‘I’m not going to read the news,’ ‘I refuse to talk about anything difficult,’ and, ‘Any time I think of something sad and scary I’m just going to push it down,’” she said. “That’s unhealthy.”

There are times when we simply can’t deal with an emotion in the moment. Maybe we have a deadline, or a child to care for, or we’re in the supermarket and it’s not appropriate to cry, scream or yell. In that case, Swart said, we can make an agreement with ourselves that we will make space to sit with it, journal about it or talk about it with a friend or therapist later.

“It’s not easy, and I’m not saying we can do it 100% of the time,” Swart said. “But it’s possible to give yourself some relief from that constant worry.”

Intention is everything

Jaz Robbins, a trauma therapist who teaches psychology at Pepperdine University, said the key to healthy compartmentalizing is intentionality.

“I think about people who do social justice work,” she said. “They also have to take a break, to rest and rejuvenate. If they were to say, ‘I won’t rest until I see justice done,’ whatever that metric is, then unfortunately that person may not see rest in their lifetime.”

Advocates and others can allow themselves to relax by being mindful about why they are taking a break from their activism to go out dancing, visit with family or just catch up on the latest season of “The Great British Baking Show.”

“To me, compartmentalizing is when an individual exercises a healthy boundary, with intention, in service of a value they hold,” she explained. “That value could be family, health, community, relaxation or even comfort. Comfort is absolutely a value.”

Robbins’ patients are already beginning to talk with her about their anxiety over the November election.

“They say, ‘I don’t have the bandwidth for this,’” she said. “And I tell them, ‘You don’t.’ When you get that whisper or inkling that you don’t have the bandwidth for something, you don’t have the bandwidth.”

To help them take even a quick break from their worries, Robbins challenges her patients to build what she calls “a distress tolerance toolkit.” This involves listing five things that make you smile, five that make you laugh, five that inspire you and five that help you relax.

“The idea is to put it together before you need it,” she said. “That way, when the foundation is shaky, you can go to your list and say, ‘I really need a laugh right now.’”

Other strategies to regulate your emotions around a distressing situation include meditation, yoga and exercise, said Swart. She also recommends journaling, talking to a friend or therapist and imagining what advice you would give someone you care about who’s in the same situation. “This allows you to step back and get perspective,” she said.

Bufka, the stress expert, said getting enough sleep is especially important when we’re dealing with stressful situations. “If we don’t have adequate sleep, then we’re less prepared to handle what’s coming our way.”

She encourages her patients to develop habits that help them relax before bedtime and take their mind off of world events. For her, it’s doing number puzzles like sudoku. For others it might be snuggling with a pet or reading a fantasy or mystery novel.

Bufka also tells people that, just before falling asleep, they might visualize a box and imagine putting all their worries into it — as long as they don’t throw away the key.

“They will still be there when you wake up,” she said.

Lifestyle

Street Style Look of the Week: Airy Beachy Clothes

Published

9 hours ago

April 22, 2026

Press Room

Street Style Look of the Week: Airy Beachy Clothes

“She’s like a female Willy Wonka,” Sakief Baron, 36, said about Kendra Austin, 32, after she explained that her personal style had a playful and cartoonish spirit.

Dressed in loose, oversize layers in blue and neutral shades, the couple were walking on the Upper East Side of Manhattan when I noticed them on a Saturday in April. There was a symmetry to their ensembles, so it wasn’t too surprising when she noted that he had influenced her fashion sense.

Before they met, she said, she was “less sure” about her wardrobe choices. “I also have lost 100 pounds in the time we’ve been together,” she added, which she said had helped her to recalibrate her relationship with clothes.

His style has been influenced by hip-hop culture, basketball players like Allen Iverson and his mother’s Finnish background. “I just take all these pieces and then it kind of comes together,” he said.

Both described themselves as multidisciplinary artists; he also has a job at a youth center, mentoring children. “I want to make sure that I look like someone they want to aspire to be every time they see me,” he said.

Lifestyle

What are Angelenos giving away in one Buy Nothing group? All this treasured stuff

Published

10 hours ago

April 22, 2026

Press Room

What are Angelenos giving away in one Buy Nothing group? All this treasured stuff

In my L.A. Buy Nothing group, I started noticing how some objects, given for free from neighbor to neighbor, carry emotional weight. An item was more than it appeared. It was a piece of personal history, perhaps one with generational memories.

From one person’s hands to another’s, objects find new life through the free gift economy on Facebook or the Buy Nothing app. Buy Nothing Project, a public benefit corporation, reports having 14 million members across more than 50 countries who give away 2.6 million items a month. There are more than 100 groups in Los Angeles alone.

Buy Nothing reduces waste by keeping items out of landfills. It also builds community. When our lives are increasingly online, Buy Nothing encourages us to get out of our cars and make connections with neighbors, even if the interaction is no more than a wave when picking something up left by a doorstep. Researchers have found that even small social interactions can foster a sense of belonging.

Still, Buy Nothing has its challenges. For years, some have complained that the groups shouldn’t be limited to neighborhoods, but rather have more open borders. Last year, many longtime members complained about the project enforcing its trademark, leading Facebook to shut down unregistered groups even if they were serving people under economic strain. Critics saw the tattling as a shift from mutual aid toward control and branding. For its part, Buy Nothing says its decisions are based on building community, trust and safety.

Despite those disagreements, Buy Nothing offers a platform for special connections. As much as there are jokes about people offering half-eaten cake, many have passed along treasured items. Buy Nothing items may feel too valuable for the trash or too personal for Goodwill. The interaction between giver and receiver becomes just as meaningful as the object itself.

I set out to document these quiet exchanges in my Buy Nothing group, drawn to the question of why people choose to pass their belongings from one neighbor to another.

Tiny builders, big exchange

Lidia Butcher gives a toolbox and worktable her two sons used to Chelsea Ward for her 17-month-old son.

“We’ve had the toolbox and worktable for the last 10 years, it’s been very special. When I told my youngest son we were going to give it away, he was a little sad. He said he was still playing with it, but then I explained that it’s been sitting untouched for a year and that if we gave it to someone else, maybe someone else would be happy about it. So he felt joy about giving it to another child who would want to play with it. I have this little emotional feeling letting it go, but at the same time, it’s a good feeling. Like a new beginning.”

— Lidia Butcher, 35, joined the group several years ago when someone told her a person in the group once asked for a cup of sugar.

“We’re getting a worktable. Benji is now old enough to be interested in playing with tools. I’m going to move my drafting table out of his room. His bedroom is my office. So that will go into storage or the Buy Nothing group and the worktable will go in its place. We live in an apartment, and as he’s growing, his needs change but our space doesn’t. Buy Nothing is really helpful to be able to cycle out of stuff.”

— Chelsea Ward, 38, has found the Buy Nothing group extremely helpful since becoming a mom.

Something borrowed

Abby Rodriguez lends Sophie Janinet a veil for her wedding.

“Sophie had asked for a wedding veil on our Buy Nothing group and I’m lending it to her because I wanted it to have a second life. I hate the idea that precious things just sit there and never get touched. My wedding day was one of the best days of my life. At one point the power went out and now we have this amazing picture with my husband and I and everyone using their phone to light up the dance floor.”

— Abby Rodriguez, 40, discovered Buy Nothing when she moved to her northeast L.A. neighborhood in 2020.

“I moved to Los Angeles from France four years ago. The day I joined Buy Nothing was the first time I felt connected to the community. It played a huge role in my adapting to life here. I’m receiving a veil because I want my wedding to look and feel like my values. I thrifted my dress, I chose a local seamstress to alter the dress but when I tried it on, I felt something was missing. I wanted a veil but I didn’t want to buy new because I didn’t want to add anything to the landfill. So I posted a request for the veil on Buy Nothing.”

— Sophie Janinet, 37, is recreating the low-waste, slower-paced values she once lived by in France through her local Buy Nothing community.

2 Two women sit on steps with a fake owl.

1. Abby Rodriguez, left, holds her wedding veil that she is lending Sophie Janinet, right, for her upcoming wedding. 2. Michele Sawers, left stands with Beth Penn, right, while giving her a decorative owl.

A pigeon-spooking owl gets a second life

Michele Sawers gives Beth Penn a decorative owl.

“Coming from a place of luck, now I have plenty to give. The owl has been with me for 26 years. I bought the owl soon after I bought this house. The owl was purchased because I had a pigeon problem, they would camp out under my eves and I would have bird poop everywhere. The owl must have worked because they’re gone and they haven’t come back.”

— Michele Sawers, 58, uses Buy Nothing regularly to connect with her community and support her low-consumption values.

“There are things I don’t want to own. So borrowing those things on Buy Nothing is really nice. There is a person who I borrowed their cooler twice and their ladder twice so I feel like they are my neighbor even though they are not [right next door]. We get these birds that poop on the deck and the recommendation online was to get a fake owl. When it was posted on Buy Nothing, I thought, ‘I have to have that owl!’ It’s going to have a good home with me on the deck with some cats, a dog and some kids.”

— Beth Penn, 47, once helped build her local Buy Nothing group and now experiences it from the other side, as a member.

Stuffed toys find a new purpose

Two women stand in front of a green plant holding stuffed dolls and a bag of ball pit balls.

Magaly Leyva gives stuffed toys and plastic play balls to Tatiana Lonny.

“My mother-in-law gave the dolls and plastic play balls to my daughter, but she has so much. My daughter is not going to play with them with the same intent that another kid would, because she’s really little. I’d rather another kid use these things.”

— Magaly Leyva, 35, joined Buy Nothing nearly four years ago to find clothes for her nephew.

“I’m taking these new items to a township called Langa in South Africa. I know the kids there will be so happy. They have so little there. I’m doing this all by myself, I’m just collecting a GoFundMe for the suitcase fee at the airport.”

— Tatiana Lonny, 51, began using Buy Nothing in hopes of finding resources to support the animals she rescues.

A second helping

Laura Cherkas gives Aurora Sanchez a cast iron pan.

“Buy Nothing gives me the freedom to let go of things because I know that they will stay in the community and the neighborhood. I’m giving a couple of cast iron items that my husband and I got when we were on a cast iron kick, probably during COVID. We determined that we don’t actually use these particular pans and they were just making our drawers heavy. So we decided to let someone else get some use out of them.

“I hate throwing things away. I want to see things have another life. Sometimes I take things to a donation center, but I like the personal connection with Buy Nothing and that you know that there is someone who definitely wants your item.”

— Laura Cherkas, 40, has built connections with other moms through Buy Nothing and values it as a way to cycle toys in and out for her child.

Two women stand by a gate at night holding cast iron pans.

“I wanted a cast iron pan because I cook a lot of grilled meat. I’m excited to try this style of cooking out and it will help me when I cook for only one or two people. I got lucky because I was chosen to receive it.”

— Aurora Sanchez, 54, has spent the past two years engaging with Buy Nothing, finding in it a sense of neighborly support that makes her feel valued while strengthening her connection to the community.

Next player up

A man poses next to a basketball hoop in front of his garage.

Joe Zeni first offered a basketball hoop on Buy Nothing in 2023, where it remains unclaimed.

“I’m giving away a Huffy basketball freestanding hoop because it’s just taking up space. We used to play horse and shoot baskets together. My son is now 35, he doesn’t live here anymore.”

— Joe Zeni, 70, uses Buy Nothing often to give items away, believing many of the things he no longer needs still have purpose.

Lifestyle

Armani Goes Back to the Archive

Published

21 hours ago

April 21, 2026

Press Room

In the year since his death, there has been no hard pivot at Armani. The shadow of the founder has stayed in place over the Milan HQ, where the brand seems happy to leave it. Armani is not just plumbing the past for continued inspiration, it’s reselling it.

Today, Giorgio Armani is announcing Archivio, a grouping of 13 men’s and women’s looks, plucked from the brand’s back catalog and remade for today. (And, yes, at today’s prices.) There’s a jacket in pinstriped alpaca of 1979 vintage; a buttery one-and-a-half breasted jacket with a maitre d’s flair that first appeared in 1987; and an unstructured silk-linen suit that will activate ’90s flashbacks for die-hard Armani clients and those who want to capture that era’s nostalgia. The advertising campaign was shot and styled by Eli Russell Linnetz, who has his own label, ERL, but always seems to be the first call brands make when they want sultry photos with the aura of Details magazine circa 1995. (He did a similar thing for Guess recently.)

Linnetz’s images are a reminder of how Armani’s work still reverberates decades later.

Archivio is also a canny recognition of what shoppers crave now. On the resale market, Armani wares are as coveted as can be. Every week it seems as if I get an email from Ndwc0, a British vintage store, announcing a new drop of meaty-shouldered ’90s Armani power suits. They sell for less than $500. At Sorbara’s in Brooklyn, you can buy a tan Giorgio Armani vest for $225.

That vintage-mad audience is in Armani’s sights: To introduce the collection, it’s staging an installation, opening today, at Giorgio Armani’s Milan boutique. It will feature the hosts of “Throwing Fits,” a New York-based podcast whose hosts wear vintage Armani button-ups and shout out stores like Sorbara’s.

It’s prudent, if a bit disconnected. Part of the charm of old Armani is that it can be found on the cheap. I’m wearing a pair of vintage Giorgio Armani corduroys as I write this. I bought them for $76 on eBay. Archivio is reverent, but its prices, which range from $1,025 to $12,000, may scare off shoppers willing to do the searching themselves.

If you ask me, the next frontier of this archive fixation is that a brand — and a big one — will release a mountain of genuine vintage pieces. J. Crew and Banana Republic have tried this at a small scale, but a luxury house like Armani hasn’t gone there. Yet. Eventually, Armani (or a brand like it) is going to grab hold of the market that exists around its brand, but through which it gets no cut.