亞裔長者應該繼續跳舞，在悲劇之後如何重建的其他建議

Published

1 year ago

February 17, 2023

Press Room

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今年是農曆兔年，（或在越南稱之為的貓年），應該是要帶來平和的時光。但今年的農曆新年慶祝活動，因為兩起重大槍擊案而中斷。

在蒙特利公園市（Monterey Park）槍擊案中的受害人包括了年紀在50幾、60幾、以及70幾歲堅韌強壯的第一代亞裔美國人移民。

1月21日，在Monterey Park的“舞星”舞廳發生了加州近幾年來最嚴重的大規模槍擊事件之一，使大眾震驚不已。許多受害者都是舞廳的常客，他們因對舞蹈的熱愛而相聚。這是他們的故事。

一位在洛杉磯市（Los Angeles）Yellow Chair Collective 機構擔任治療師的Phuong Tang 表示： “我想在這個世代，他們必須多做的，就是存活下來，為他們家庭接下來的世世代代，建立更安全更豐裕的生活。” 她接著說： “想到老人家在從事歡樂，且對他們身體有益的活動時被攻擊，真的是令人心碎。”

是的，有益健康的。即使老年人不把他們所做的運動和參加與朋友的聚會，當作是一種心理健康的療癒，這些活動是照顧身心健康的好方法。

史丹福大學（Stanford College）的心理學家 Helen Hsu 告訴她的老人病患： “現在最重要的是找到平衡。”

她告訴她的病人： “如果你的身心失去平衡，你就必須積極主動地找回平衡。她說的意思就是：這包括身體上（人身肉體）、心理上（心思神志），以及社交上（你的親友）。”

Paul Hoang 在經營一家個位於芳泉市Fountain Valley 的 Transferring Ahead Psychological Institute 機構。他說：“花點時間來哀悼也是健康的，但不要去避免那些對你健康有益的活動。如果你不能回到舞廳，那就找其他方法運動、放鬆、並與你的朋友保持聯繫。”

同樣重要的是，要去了解即使那些沒有受到最近暴力事件直接影響的人，也可能會感到憂心、生病或害怕。

根據由Hsu、Hoang、Tang 以及她在Yellow Chair Collective 單位的同事 Jessie Li的建議, 以下是自我提問的問題清單。

1. 你有沒有在照顧自己的身體？

為了幫助照顧你的家人與朋友，你必須確定自己有在照顧自己。

擁有健康飲食和充分睡眠是基本事項，但可能會在受到生活壓力時容易忘記。

Hsu 表示：“就像在中醫裡，至關重要的是要注意你的食欲和睡眠有沒有異常亂變。” Hsu 還說：“我們有些人用吃東西處理個人情緒，有些人則是停止進食。”

特別是如果已經持續了幾個星期，那就是你本人或你所愛的人，可能身體不適的徵兆。

Hoang 說：“繼續去做你平常會做的事情。”

在憂慮緊張的時候，文化儀式和傳統方法也會是有幫助的。有些家庭在家中設有祭壇，並也會點香。有些人則會去廟宇參拜或去教會祈禱。這些做法可以幫助去感念你所哀悼的人，而且表彰褒頌他們的一生。

2. 你有沒有因為害怕，而去避免社交互動？

有些老年人喜歡獨處。但是人通常是需要感覺有和他人保持聯繫，來保持健康。

Hsu 說：“找到一個方法來表達自己和參加聚會，是十分療癒的。”

你可以在老人中心舉辦一個活動嗎？或是在當地餐廳吃午餐？或者在住家辦一個小型的聚會？

Li 說：當你在那裡的時候，提出論點，讓每個人形容他們的感覺，並說出自己的故事。

專業們也建議一些保持健康快樂的方法，特別那些蒙特利公園市（ Monterey Park）的社區成員，喜歡透過跳舞，來表達自己。

Hoang 表示：隨著他們遠離跳舞的時間愈長，引發罹患創傷後壓力症（PTSD）的機率就愈高。重新在他們愛好的活動中找回安全感，是至關重要的。你不會想要那個活動，去連結到這個負面事件。

Tang 說：這就好像是你用新的記憶，去覆蓋住硬碟一樣。不要忘記你在那的地方有很多好的回憶，而且要用更多好的回憶來填補它。

Tang 說：人們都有聽過創傷後壓力症候群，但也有創傷後的成長。或許這次悲劇，會讓某個人產生一個使命感，要來保障他們社區的安全。

她說：我想對於任何人，不論在任何年紀，應該是一直要保持連繫，而且要有歸屬感。

3. 你有在主動關心問候你的朋友和所愛的人嗎？

Li 說：老年人的挑戰可能是無形的。較年輕的世代，他們可能是面對在學校的問題或是工作上的衝突。但是，老人家則可能是單獨地在掙扎。

提醒你的朋友與家人，他們在他們長輩身體健康上，是扮演著一個重要角色。而且他們來查看和問候老人家，確定老人家有說話的對象的話，會對於長者的身心健康，是很有助益的。

4. 你會感覺到身體在痛嗎？

Tang 說：老年人是很順應他們身體的反應。如果有一個新的病痛久久不散，很多人會去看醫生拿一些藥，或是避免惡化下去。

她說：“經歷過創傷的人，也會在他們的身體中感受到（這些反應）。所以要記得，如果你或你的朋友有久久不退的胃痛或頭痛，這可能是與情緒上壓力有關。”

5. 你是否需要更多專業協助？

請求協助並不是虛弱的象徵。它是恢復力量的方法。

Hoang 說：很多移民和說同樣母語的人說話時，會比較自在。去找一個了解你的文化歷史背景的人。

如果你不喜歡某個治療師，那就另外找一個。重點是要找到合適的。你不會一直去看那個沒有能力幫助你復原的醫生。

Hsu 說：有些亞裔美國人移民會感到比較自在，和來自相同祖國的專業人士說話。現在很多預約都可以在網上進行，例如，比較容易去看到來自台灣的治療師。

6. 你有沒有耐心對待自己，或那些你所愛而正在感覺不適的人呢？

在一個悲劇事件發生之後，很多人會處於驚嚇的存活模式之中。很多人可能覺得自己處理得很好，他們或許是對的。但他們有可能在幾個月後，一年之後，在一個沒有預期的地方，屆時他們會受到一個沒有預料的哀傷打擊所提醒，而變得不知所措。

Hsu 說：那是正常的。過去發生的事對很多這些家庭而言，是無法修復挽回的。

Tang 說：作為治療師，我們經常會提到有關悲傷和損失，以及悲傷的各個階段，而這不是一個線性或直線的過程。你不會從否認，變成協商計劃，變成憤怒，變成接受。你比較像是會跳來跳去，最後你會登陸，並立足在希望之上。

“但這是需要時間才能做到的，所以保持耐心，體恤你自己和其他的人。”

Hold on to your wishes — there's a 'Spider in the Well'

Published

4 hours ago

May 19, 2024

Press Room

Hold on to your wishes — there's a 'Spider in the Well'

Spider in the Well, written and illustrated by Jess Hannigan

Once upon a time, in the folkloric town of Bad Göodsburg, which is probably in Germany, there was an overworked newsboy.

Not only did he bring the people their daily news, he also swept their chimneys, shined their shoes, and brought them their milk.

He was overworked, and underappreciated.

So, when the townspeople discover that their wishing well is broken, the newsboy sets off to fix it — and get some revenge. Thus begins this children’s tale of extortion, labor rights, and justice.

Author and illustrator Jess Hannigan spoke about her debut picture book, Spider in the Well, with NPR’s Tamara Keith. Here are excerpts from that conversation, edited in parts for clarity and length.

Spider in the Well

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Spider in the Well

Interview highlights

Tamara Keith: How did you come to write a book about a spider, when I understand that you are afraid of spiders?

Jess Hannigan: I am. I don’t care for them. But do I love the webs they spin? Yes. Do I love the spooky aesthetic? Of course. Basically, the whole story came about because I really just had the image of looking down a well with the web, with the spider in it, and I thought that would look cool. And then I kind of asked myself, like, ‘Is there a story here? Why is he in there? What’s he catching in the web?’ And it kind of just wrote itself from there.

Keith: Is everyone in Bad Göodsburg a little bit bad and a little bit good? Or are all people a little bit bad and a little bit good?

Hannigan: Well it’s supposed to be, you know, real life. I really like when a character is in a gray area with some good and some bad because it’s realistic and relatable. And we have heroes and we have “villains,” but they’re just like us. And that way they’re humanized. And you just get to kind of discuss who you side with, who you agree with.

Keith: How would you describe what this book looks like?

Hannigan: I did the whole thing completely digitally. I kind of was going for a sort of imperfect printmaking effect because I love the look of block printing, but I don’t have the patience. So this was kind of a happy medium of me achieving that kind of folkloric, old-timey printing look without any of the labor.

Keith: Where did you draw your inspiration for the art? The colors are not colors that you traditionally see in a children’s book. It’s like black and hot orange and purple.

Hannigan: A lot of my inspiration for the kind of shapes that I use comes from like, Polish posters. They’re from the 1960s and ’70s — Polish poster design was crazy and they had the wackiest shapes and colors, and I was introduced to those back in college.

These were just the colors that I had been obsessed with at the time that I happened to be making the book. They are like these kind of sickly, weird tones. And I used all those purples and greens for the “bad guys” because I guess it suited their vibe. But I’m actually colorblind, very slightly. So everyone’s been telling me this book is such a lovely shade of orange and I’ve been telling everyone it’s red.

Keith: What lesson do you want the kids who are reading this book — or who are reading it with their parents — what do you want them to take away from it?

Hannigan: I didn’t go into making this story with a lesson in mind. I know books with morals are important and they have a place for sure. But really I just wanted to make people laugh. And to go back and read it again and think, ‘What the heck was this guy even doing? Where did they learn how to do blackmail? Who taught them about extortion and labor rights and things?’

I love stories like that, that just make you wonder more about them.

Lifestyle

Diddy Posts Apology Video for Cassie Beating

Published

5 hours ago

May 19, 2024

Press Room

Diddy Posts Apology Video for Cassie Beating

Diddy‘s uttering his first words about the videotaped beating of Cassie … saying he “takes full responsibility for his actions,” and claims he’s already gone to rehab.

He posted a video Sunday morning, looking directly into camera, he said, “It’s so difficult to reflect on the darkest times in your life, but sometimes you gotta do that. I was f***ed up. I mean, I hit rock bottom.”

A 2016 video shows Sean “Diddy” Combs assaulting then-girlfriend Cassie Ventura in an altercation that matches some allegations in now-settled lawsuit https://t.co/fYUQ2z2MYN
— CNN (@CNN) May 17, 2024
@CNN

He says he’s not making any excuses for his behavior — the brutal March 2016 assault on his then-girlfriend Cassie while they were staying at the InterContinental Hotel in Los Angeles. The surveillance video — obtained by CNN — showed Diddy chase her down a hallway, grab her by the back of the neck and hurl her to the ground .. where he kicked her and dragged her.

Diddy claims he “sought out professional help” after the incident. He says, I had to go into therapy. Go into rehab. I had to ask God for his mercy and grace.”

He didn’t offer any detail about how long he was in treatment.

TMZ Studios

He ended the video with an apology, of sorts … “I’m so sorry, but I’m committed to be a better man each and everyday. I’m not asking for forgiveness. I’m truly sorry.”

What’s interesting is he did not directly apologize to Cassie — and, so, it comes off more as an apology to the public than the victim.

Remember, Cassie described the attack in the sexual assault lawsuit she filed in November against Diddy — a lawsuit they settled just one day later.

At the time, Diddy’s attorney emphasized the settlement was in no way an admission of guilt, and Diddy himself would later deny all the allegations made against him in several lawsuits.

Lifestyle

Wait Wait… Don't Tell Me!

Published

11 hours ago

May 19, 2024

Press Room

NPR’s weekly news quiz hosted by Peter Sagal. Have a laugh and test your knowledge with today’s funniest comedians and a celebrity guest.Hate free content? Try a subscription to Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!+. Your subscription supports public radio and unlocks fun bonus episodes along with sponsor-free listening. Learn more at https://plus.npr.org/waitwait