Lifestyle
The movie 'It Ends With Us' faces criticism for glamorizing domestic abuse
Critics have said the promotional materials for the film It Ends With Us glamorize domestic violence.
Justin Tallis/AFP via Getty Images
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Justin Tallis/AFP via Getty Images
Colleen Hoover’s bestselling novel It Ends With Us has been adapted into a star-studded film, starring the likes of Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni. But the much-talked-about film is facing criticism for appearing to glamorize its depiction of domestic abuse.
The film, which draws from Hoover’s own parents’ relationship, tells the story of florist Lily Bloom, who falls in love with a neurosurgeon named Ryle Kincaid.
During their courtship, Kincaid goes from charming and charismatic to physically and emotionally abusive. Bloom eventually ends the relationship, telling her daughter that the cycle of violence “ends with us,” reflecting the film’s title.
Based on promotional materials for the film, however, some critics say the message about abuse might not come across to viewers.
“The trailer does a disservice to the fact that this could really raise awareness,” said activist and domestic violence survivor Ashley Bendiksen. “But it seems to just be glossing over what the movie’s actually about.”
In one trailer — set to the song “Strangers” by Ethel Cain, which includes the lyrics “don’t talk to strangers or you might fall in love” — the movie seems to hit all the right notes of a typical romance movie.
Viewers see the two main characters — played by Lively and Baldoni — launch into a romantic relationship. You’re teased with the potential of a love triangle, down to a fistfight between the two male suitors. And there’s a brief bout of rage from Kincaid as he breaks a piece of furniture in his apartment.
But the full story is much darker. The abuse Bloom suffers at the hands of Kincaid in the film includes being pushed down a flight of stairs and attempted rape.
“When we use trauma as entertainment, it can feel really exploitative, and just irresponsible, and, in many ways, tone-deaf to the actual issue,” Bendiksen said.
Fan blowback
The film, which was released on Aug. 9, has earned a respectable $242 million worldwide. But despite its success at the box office, criticisms have been scathing.
In one promotional video posted on Instagram, a smiling Lively sits alongside the novel’s author, Hoover, and encourages the audience to “grab your friends, wear your florals and head out to see it.” Florals in this context are a reference to her character, Bloom, owning a flower shop in the film.
Comments on the video criticized Lively’s upbeat tone and attempts to promote the movie as a lighthearted love story.
“As someone who lived through DV as a child, ‘grab your friends, wear your florals’ is a terrible phrase to use about a film of this nature,” one commenter wrote.
“You had an opportunity to turn this into a beautiful thing for women who suffer every day. Shame on you and your PR team for turning a blind eye,” another said.
Many of the comments praised Baldoni, however, for his style in promoting the story.
In one interview posted to the star’s Instagram page, Baldoni says his message for viewers is to always have hope.
“Everybody has the ability to end a cycle that they didn’t ask for. We can all say, ‘It ends with us’ in our life,” Baldoni said.
Baldoni directed the film, and Lively is one of its producers.
“Thank you so much for being the ONLY person on this cast promoting the actual point of this film,” one commenter wrote in response.
“It’s funny to me how the person that is portraying the offender is the only one making the point of the actual story.”
Brandon Sklenar, who plays Baldoni’s romantic rival in the film, said that he and his fellow cast-mates understood the gravity of telling a story about domestic abuse.
“Trust me when I tell you, there isn’t a single person involved in the making of this film that was not aware of the responsibility we had in making this. A responsibility to all the women who have experienced generational trauma – domestic abuse – or struggle with looking in the mirror and loving who they see,” Sklenar wrote in a lengthy statement posted to his Instagram account.
“This movie is a harsh reality check for the men who need to get their sh-t together and take responsibility for themselves and their actions.”
Comments on the statement were turned off, but comments on unrelated posts took the cast to task over the way the film was being promoted.
“Your most recent post is just perpetuating how TONE DEAF this whole cast is (besides Justin). We don’t want to hear you all defend each other. How about apologize and change the way you’re all promoting the movie and talk about the issue – [domestic violence],” wrote one frustrated commenter.
Hoover, in a separate interview with Lively, said she felt that the film had been “faithful” to the story she wrote.
“Trigger warning”
Obbie West, a spoken-word artist and advocate for victims of domestic abuse, said that the framing of the film could wind up being triggering for abuse victims.
“Prior to presentations or prior to trainings, I give trigger warnings, and the trigger warning lets anyone in the room know that this content is going to be very sensitive in nature. That way, if any of it aligns with something they’ve been through and they feel triggered, we identify who are the people in the room that’s qualified to help you,” West said.
Trailers for the film do not include any sort of trigger warnings for content.
“So when you present this movie as a love movie without that precursor, then you have a theater full of people who aren’t aware that they may potentially be triggered.”
West said that in framing the movie as a love story, it could be damaging, particularly to young people who don’t have a healthy frame of reference for love and aren’t as easily able to recognize signs of abuse.
“If this is common practice and we’re constantly presenting love in this way, then for those children who are still developing, it normalizes it and desensitizes them to abuse,” West said.
Lifestyle
Greetings from London, where Banksy’s flag man is a warning cry
In central London’s Waterloo Place, a life-size statue that emerged overnight in late April has been creating a stir. When I visited a few weeks after it was erected, local authorities had already set up protective barriers around it.
The installation — signed by the famed street artist Banksy — depicts a man in a suit hoisting a flag as he strides over a precipice. As he marches on, the flag blows backward to cover his face, leaving him unaware he’s only a step away from a perilous fall.
Set among grand monuments celebrating Britain’s past, the “flag man” takes on a particular visual irony at a time when the country — and much of the world — is debating its path forward.
Like many viewers there, I found myself wondering whether this statue is Banksy’s warning about the consequences of uncritical nationalism, or simply a reflection on human shortsightedness. Or, perhaps, it is just prompting us to ponder a broader question: What happens when devotion to a symbol prevents us from seeing what lies ahead?
Whatever the message, the work feels remarkably attuned to the current moment.
For more Far-Flung Postcards, click here.
Lifestyle
Wait, it’s a candle? Her beeswax fruit and veggie ones look so real, you’ll want to take a bite
Jessica Gonzalez hustles behind her booth at the recent Renegade Craft Fair, frantically ringing up sales, answering questions and packaging her beeswax candles.
It’s hot on the grounds of the Los Angeles State Historic Park in April, but 35-year-old Gonzalez and her fiancé, Jordan Colindres, keep their cool as a crowd gathers to admire her Happy Organics candle collection, a homage to her family’s produce company in the Central Valley that looks like real fruits and vegetables.
“I love doing in-person events because it’s so fun to see people’s reactions,” she said a few months later. “It makes me feel good to see other people finding joy in my candles. They often say, ‘Oh, that’s really funny.’ And it is funny to have a cherry candle on top of your birthday cake.”
1. A staff member pulls a beeswax corn candle, $26, out of its mold at Happy Organics’ studio in downtown Los Angeles. 2. Each Beeswax Mixed Berry Birthday Candles set is cast from real mixed berries — strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, blueberries and cherries. A set of 10 is $30. 3. Bartlett green pears and heirloom tomatoes, $24 to $40.
Judging by the smiles and charmed looks on shoppers’ faces, her produce-inspired candles are less about illuminating rooms and more about sharing the joy she sought when she first started the company in 2018.
In this series, we highlight independent makers and artists, from glassblowers to fiber artists, who are creating original products in and around Los Angeles.
But then, it’s hard not to smile at the playfully elegant Bosc pears, puckered mandarins and green-and-purple asparagus taper candles which range in price from $12 to $40. Some are molded into corn on the cob, celery and rhubarb shapes. Others are made to look like mushrooms, figs, tomatoes and snap peas. The most popular are the small birthday candles shaped like raspberries, cherries and blackberries, packed in molded-pulp baskets just like you’d find at the grocery store or farmers market.
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Gonzalez didn’t start out as a designer. The youngest of nine children, she was born in 1991 in Salinas and later moved to Merced, where she grew up on a 10-acre farm. She studied computer science at Mills College, then worked in tech consulting in the Bay Area and eventually became the CTO of an ag-tech company. When her mother, Angela, became ill in 2016, she returned to Merced to be with her family.
When her mom died suddenly soon after she moved home, Gonzalez left the tech industry. “I wasn’t connected with what I was doing,” she said. “I wanted to find something more meaningful; something I loved. I didn’t want my ego to keep me stuck in what I studied in college. I decided to let myself try new hobbies and passions and look for joy again.”
After her mother’s death, she began working with her father, Salvador, and her uncles at the family’s apiary, where they managed more than 30 hives. (Her grandfather was also a beekeeper in Michoacán, Mexico.) Soon, she began selling their raw honey at local farmers markets. In a heartbreaking turn, her father was diagnosed with cancer a year later, so she started making cannabis-infused honey, balms and chocolates to help ease his pain.
When she saw that the beeswax candles, which last significantly longer than paraffin candles, were selling faster than the honey, she decided to focus on making candles from the leftovers from her uncles’ hives.
She was only 25, but it was a turning point. “It was one of those moments where I felt like I needed to change my path,” she said. “I needed to change everything in my life.”
Jessica Gonzalez and her father Salvador on their family farm in Merced. (Gonzalez family)
Gonzalez at Happy Organics’ studio in downtown Los Angeles. (Christina House / Los Angeles Times)
When her father died in 2018, she inherited his bees and started Happy Organics, although she hadn’t planned on starting a business. After experiencing so much loss, making candles became a kind of therapy. “It felt great to work with my hands again, something I thought I’d never have time for,” she said.
Her oldest sister, Sonia Gonzalez, said Gonzalez reminds her a lot of their father, who reinvented himself many times over the years.
The nopal cactus is cast from a real nopal and hand-poured in 100% pure beeswax in the Los Angeles studio.
“He grew up as a village boy in the rural mountains of Michoacán, Mexico, and went on to work in restaurants, cut down Christmas trees and pick strawberries and broccoli in the fields of Salinas,” she wrote in an email. “From there, he started selling produce door-to-door, then at flea markets and eventually built his own produce distribution business from the ground up. As the youngest of nine kids from a working-class family, Jessica’s always been incredibly resourceful, responsible, and amazing at reinventing herself.”
Like a lot of millennials, Gonzalez taught herself how to make candles by watching YouTube videos. She started with hand-dipped tapers, working in the garage on the farm that helped her feel safe and connected to her parents. “It was a really nice environment to try something new and creative,” she said.
Inspired by her family’s produce, she cast real corn, strawberries and cherries in plaster, then made a silicone mold to create copies. Even when using the same mold, color can vary from batch to batch, and how it cools also affects the result. “That’s just how handmade things are,” she said. “There’s always some variation.”
Cherry molds make cherry candles at Happy Organics’ studio in downtown Los Angeles.
A variety of fruit and veggie candles.
When she moved to Los Angeles in 2023 to be with Colindres, her business took off. “L.A. is a great place to grow,” she said. “There’s so much opportunity here. When I go to a farmers market, I never know who I’ll meet.”
She sold her candles in person at craft shows, the Hollywood Farmers’ Market and most recently, during a residency at the P.F. Candle Co. showroom in Echo Park.
1. A staff member trims the wicks on a pair of carrot birthday candles, $22. 2. Gonzalez passes by shelves of candles at Happy Organics’ studio in downtown Los Angeles. 3. Asparagus taper candles, $30.
“I have a lot of respect for her as a fellow candle maker (making molds is not easy), but getting to know her story more and how her choice of foods and wax is reflective of her family’s history gave it so much meaning,” P.F. Candle Co. founder and creative director Kristen Pumphrey said in an email. “It’s been a tough couple of years for L.A. businesses, so we gotta stick together — there’s this wonderful sense of community hosting a local brand that’s so passionate about their work.”
As her business has expanded, her products are now available at Terrain, Joan’s on Third and the MoMA Design Store in addition to her website. She has also had to source beeswax from other vendors across the country to keep up with demand.
Kimberly Curtis, owner of Hide & Seek Vintage in Studio City, said Gonzalez’s strawberry and cherry birthday candles “flew off the shelves last year” during the holidays. “Our customers love them,” she added.
Gonzalez holds a cabbage candle.
Still, Gonzalez stays connected to her Central Valley roots. Everything she and her small team make in downtown Los Angeles is handmade and “takes time,” she said, describing the steps involved in crafting quality candles. Right now, her favorite is the Nopal Cactus candle, which she made using a clipping from an employee’s yard. While others help her with production, wholesale management and packaging, she focuses on sales, content and all-new product development.
When asked if she has advice for others who want to start their own business, Gonzalez admits she sometimes feels overwhelmed.
In 2013, Gonzalez and her family gathered at their Merced ranch to celebrate her parents’ anniversary.
(Gonzalez family)
“The biggest thing that has gotten me through the toughest spots is my why or my reason for starting,” she said. “I think that has to be really strong. That’s what brought me a lot of comfort when I felt like quitting: going back to the beginning and remembering why I started this.”
For Gonzalez, her reason is always close to her heart. “I wanted to feel connected to my parents in some way,” she said. “This was a good representation of my upbringing.”
Lifestyle
How does the Kennedy Center board make decisions? This legal filing sheds some light
The Kennedy Center, the facade of which remains covered with a tarp, is seen in Washington, DC, on June 28, 2026. A US federal judge asked on June 24 for an explanation for why a tarpaulin continues to cover the facade of the Kennedy Center where President Donald Trump’s name was recently removed. District Judge Christopher Cooper gave the board of trustees of the performing arts venue until the end of July to explain “the purpose for and status of the tarp and scaffolding that Defendants have erected on the front portico of the Center.”
ALEX WROBLEWSKI/AFP via Getty Images
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ALEX WROBLEWSKI/AFP via Getty Images
More than two weeks ago, President Trump’s name was removed from the Kennedy Center facade though it is still covered by a tarp and the legal battle continues.
On Monday, a U.S. Department of Justice filing on behalf of the Kennedy Center included some surprises. The document was submitted in response to issues raised by lawyers for ex-officio board member Rep. Joyce Beatty of Ohio who is suing to remove President Trump’s name from the center and stop its closure for renovations.
Among the revelations, the Kennedy Center admitted that, during a board meeting on December 18, 2025, Beatty had been “muted and prevented from speaking.” It was at that meeting that the board voted to add President Trump’s name to the center. The filing later acknowledges the congresswoman was “prevented from voicing her opposition.”
The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts is a living memorial to its namesake. The guidelines for how the theatre complex spends federal dollars are very specific. Among other rules, it states that “no additional memorials or plaques shall be designated or installed.” Beatty argues adding Trump’s name runs afoul of those rules and that any change requires approval from Congress.
According to one of Beatty’s filings, “There was no advance notice in the agenda that the Board would be considering a name change,” a statement the Kennedy Center now does not deny. The center admits that, prior to voting, there was “no discussion about potential risks or downsides of the vote to adopt a secondary name for the Center.” Nor was there a board discussion “about any potential conflict of interest that might result from the vote.”
The center’s lawyers previously contended that if Trump’s name were to be removed, it would “lose money from donors who support” him and “impede the Center’s fundraising efforts.”
Closing for renovations
Earlier this year, Trump announced on social media that the Kennedy Center would close for two years for renovations. He wrote that he made the decision after “a one year review” with “Contractors, Musical Experts, Art Institutions, and other Advisors and Consultants.”
But, according to the center’s lawyers, Trump’s announcement “was made without presenting any plans, analyses, timelines, or funding information to his cotrustees and without any Board vote.”
The Kennedy Center has long denied reporting by The Washington Post that ticket sales plummeted after President Trump became the Center’s board chair. In Monday’s legal filing, the Center admits that, by October 2025, “nearly half of the Center’s tickets were going unsold.”
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