An Open Letter to Louisiana Waffle Houses – About This Weekend

Dear Louisiana Waffle House Restaurants,

I know you’re surprised to be hearing from the likes of me, especially at this time of day. I know our time together is usually on the “dark side” of the clock. It’s during the nighttime hours that you have always been a beacon of light, a beacon of hope, a beacon of bacon at two in the morning. I want you to know, that our time, especially at that time of day has been really important to me.

But our wee-small-hour meals involving your oversized portions of delicious home-cooked masterpieces aren’t just about me. They’re about a lot of my friends too. While I am a regular patron of your food-enriched friendship during the week. A lot of my friends only know the glory that is Waffle House on the weekends. 

And now it looks as if those special weekend moments are being taken away.

Okay, we understand that you had to do what you had to do. We also know that the reason you had to do it was because of “us”. No, not the “us” that runs in my friendship circles but the “us” whose parents didn’t bother to teach their kids basic social skills at home.

Hey, we’re sorry that some people’s children can’t come into a Waffle House at 2:30 in the morning without causing a drunken ruckus. We also know that you have to protect your employees from those who might make poor choices after a night in the bars. And we get it. You don’t deserve that from “us”. You deserve better, dear Waffle House.

I can’t help but think how many lives you kept from being scattered, smothered, and covered in six feet of dirt just by being there. Perhaps it was your pecan waffle, a side of bacon and grits, and several cups of strong coffee that helped sober up a driver who shouldn’t have been behind the wheel.

Perhaps it was your booth, reserved for two guests or more, especially during peak hours that allowed a designated driver time to arrive to pilot a polluted friend home after a bowl of Bert’s Chili and a conversation about the pitfalls of driving under the influence.

Again, we understand why you had to change. We understand why your beautiful booths, clean bathrooms, and “The Mark” will be closed to the public from 11:30 pm until 6 am on Fridays and Saturdays. We know it’s not you. It’s us. And we are sorry, we should have behaved better.

Look, we know we can still get your delicious food “to go” in the hours when most people slumber. But it just won’t be the same. We will miss your all-night wait staff that calls us “Darlin” or “Sugar”. We will miss the fact that some of your employees refer to spicy ground pork served in a patty as “sawsha” instead of sausage.

But mostly we will miss what we love about Waffle House, it’s the feeling of being in a Waffle Home. If we behave and sales start to slip in the overnight hours would you consider taking us back on the weekend? We hope so.

Extending love from syrup-covered sticky fingers, take care,

Signed “US”