Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile Review: The Year’s Worst Film Yet

2022 has seen the meme-ification of flicks like Morbius and Minions: The Rise of Gru. Nevertheless, nothing might have ready the world for an expertise as distinctive as Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile. This musical comedy options Shawn Mendes as a singing crocodile named Lyle who lives in a Manhattan residence. When a household strikes into the residence, their worlds are turned the wrong way up in an journey crammed with pop songs, subpar CGI, and essentially the most typical story ever informed. There should not sufficient phrases to explain regardless of the hell this film was.

We’ve seen tales a couple of boy and his canine. We’ve seen tales a couple of boy and his robotic. Now, prepare for a narrative a couple of boy and his crocodile. The movie introduces us to Lyle after he’s found by Hector P. Valenti, a charismatic magician portrayed by Oscar-winning actor Javier Bardem. After his acclaimed efficiency as a psychopathic assassin in No Nation for Previous Males and recent off his Oscar-nominated efficiency in Being the Ricardos, Bardem reveals up as a singing, vibrant showman in an against-type function. How did this occur? I can not start to inform you how unbelievable it’s that Bardem agreed to do that challenge, however he definitely acts his coronary heart out on this movie.

Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile then introduces the household to us. Now we have our dad and mom performed by Constance Wu and Scoot McNairy, and their son, Josh (Winslow Fegley), a neurotic baby shifting into New York Metropolis. He will get essentially the most stereotypical, clichéd introduction ever as the brand new child in class who eats his lunch alone, and no person pays consideration to him. He will get picked on, and all he needs is a pal. However fortunately for him, a singing crocodile resides in his attic. After one or two adventures, Josh and Lyle turn into greatest pals. Sadly, their friendship doesn’t really feel eased into or pure, as they solely attain this level as a result of the screenplay dictates it.

Nevertheless, there are such a lot of points with the execution of those concepts that every little thing turns into comical. For instance, there ought to be a regulation in opposition to scenes the place people uncover unusual CGI creatures of their properties, they usually shriek at one another. We noticed this in Sonic the Hedgehog, in Clifford the Massive Purple Canine, and we get it once more with Wu’s character stumbling throughout Lyle taking a shower. As a matter of reality, the entire film is unbelievably formulaic and predictable. I knew what the whole movie can be about earlier than it even started as a result of it’s a retread of each different household movie with this idea.

We bought Clifford the Massive Purple Canine lower than a yr earlier than this film — one other poorly written household movie that tells a narrative practically an identical to this one. Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile is exclusive as a result of it’s a couple of stay, singing crocodile interacting with actual people. That being mentioned, this idea doesn’t work in any respect. Firstly, Shawn Mendes’s notorious pop music voice popping out of a crocodile seems laughable. It doesn’t look or sound correct as a result of the voice and character design merely don’t match. Secondly, Lyle doesn’t communicate a phrase of dialogue on this movie. Practically every little thing that comes out of his mouth is a part of the film’s soundtrack. It feels much less like a movie and extra like a cinematic adaptation of a Shawn Mendes album, with a large crocodile thrown into the combo.

You gained’t consider your eyes as you watch this insane movie. This doesn’t even really feel like an actual film. It seems like a fever dream or a parody of an actual film. Like a faux film enjoying on TV within the background of an precise film scene. Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile is past hilarious in essentially the most ironic manner doable. Whereas it’s the worst film of the yr, my jaw dropped a number of occasions and I had the goofiest grin. The story beats are ridiculous, and it feels just like the film by no means units up any real character drama, as a substitute shoehorning bits of it in one by one.

Moreover, the movie has Josh meet somebody in school named Kara Delaney (Lyric Hurd). She reveals up at first to ship Josh a pal request, disappears completely for about an hour, after which reveals up once more, showing to be pals with Josh. I get the impression that she had many scenes lower out, as a result of her character serves no goal within the story besides to assist Josh as soon as within the movie’s last act. The writing is so poor that it could typically really feel just like the actors don’t even consider the dialogue popping out of their mouths. This can be probably the most absurd experiences I’ve ever had as a result of it’s uncommon that I watch a film that’s totally horrible, however it additionally could also be probably the most unbelievable issues I’ve ever witnessed.

Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile could also be a masterpiece. It’s sensible in its personal manner. The songs are written by Pasek and Paul, two extremely proficient songwriters identified for his or her work in La La Land, The Best Showman, and Pricey Evan Hansen. Their songs are the strongest a part of this film, as there are just a few catchy ones, however it is a movie with lackluster path and musical numbers. That is the proper film for each youngsters and intoxicated adults. Would you want to observe a stay crocodile sitting in a courtroom? Sure, you completely would. Look no additional than this masterpiece of an atrocity.

SCORE: 2/10

As ComingSoon’s evaluate coverage explains, a rating of two equates to “Horrible.” The movie is nearly irredeemable, and is probably going a waste of time for nearly everybody concerned.

Disclosure: The critic attended the world premiere for ComingSoon’s Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile evaluate.