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Rumpelstiltskin (2025) – Movie Review

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Rumpelstiltskin (2025) – Movie Review

Rumpelstiltskin, 2025.

Directed by Andy Edwards.
Starring Hannah Baxter-Eve, Joss Carter, Adrian Bouchet, Colin Malone, James Dance, and Evyn George.

SYNOPSIS:

A modern retelling of the classic Brothers Grimm fairy tale, albeit a bit more sweary.

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What? Not another childhood favourite being given the low budget horror movie treatment? Okay, this isn’t Winnie the Pooh, Popeye or Mickey Mouse but an adaptation of a fairy tale that, if you ever care to read the original Brothers Grimm source and not the child-friendly Penguin Books editions we all grew up with, then you may be pleasantly surprised by how dark and gruesome those stories are. Ripe material to have some fun with then, yes?

Well, sort of, because on the surface of it Rumpelstiltskin is a horror movie in the same vein as the Leprechaun and Wishmaster movies, in that it takes a folkloric character, makes him look grotesque with some fun make-up and sets him loose on unsuspecting victims where he can use his magic to get what he wants.

But those movies take an ancient demonic character and put it in the modern world, whereas this movie is a straight-up(ish) adaptation of the original story, set in medieval times and full of magic and wonder. Well, it would have been if the budget went that high, but it doesn’t and so what we are left with is an ambitious movie that is unable to put everything it wants to achieve on the screen thanks to budgetary restrictions, and so adapts the script ever so slightly to include some, shall we say, spicy dialogue that may or may not have been commonplace during the period in which it is set.

For those unfamiliar with the story of Rumpelstiltskin, the basics are that the King (Colin Malone) wishes to sire a son to continue his bloodline and decides that the beautiful but promiscuous peasant girl Evalina (Hannah Baxter-Eve) shall be his chosen bride after she cons him into thinking she can create gold by spinning straw. Whilst in the castle prison, Evalina is visited by a troll-like creature (Joss Carter) who promises to spin enough gold to satisfy the King in exchange for her handing over her first-born child.

Things go well for Evalina as the King accepts she can spin gold and he marries her, but when she gives birth to a son the troll comes back for his prize, only for Evalina to go back on her deal, but if she can guess the troll’s then she can keep the child.

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A story that the movie sticks very faithfully to, and it must be said that Joss Carter and Hannah Baxter-Eve give it their all to make the script come alive – as well as Carter being magnificently mobile as the titular Rumpelstiltskin, dancing around and filling the screen with his menacingly comic persona – but to make up for the visual shortcomings in the effects department, the dialogue is peppered with F and C words in what is likely an attempt to avoid a PG rating because, aside from a very brief flash of female nudity, there is very little else here likely to cause too much distress as the movie is virtually bloodless and the CGI effects for Rumpelstiltskin’s forest demon master aren’t likely to trouble the likes of Industrial Light & Magic. They’re not terrible considering the budget, but are far too cartoonish to add any serious threat.

But there are plenty of positives to take away from this movie, as long as you temper your expectations accordingly. Rumpelstiltskin’s look is fantastic, the costume designs are straight out of Robin of Sherwood and, likewise, showcase a level of care and attention to detail that more expensive productions may have glossed over, and it rolls along at a decent clip without getting bogged down with mythology that movies based on literary sources often do. It is just that by the end of it, after the dodgy visuals, attempts to be edgy with the dialogue and a final act that feels very rushed and underwhelming, Rumpelstiltskin seems like a bit of a wasted opportunity to have done something really savage and nasty with the material, just like The Brothers Grimm no doubt would have wanted, and much like with the budget of this movie, you are left feeling a little short-changed by the end of it.

Flickering Myth Rating – Film: ★ / Movie: ★ ★ ★

Chris Ward

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=embed/playlist

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Movie Reviews

‘I Swear’ Review – Heart Sans Sap, Cursing Aplenty

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‘I Swear’ Review – Heart Sans Sap, Cursing Aplenty

The sixth outing in the director’s chair for filmmaker Kirk Jones, I Swear dramatizes the real-life story of touretter John Davidson (played by Robert Aramayo). Tourette’s Syndrome, for those unfamiliar with the condition, is a nervous system disorder that causes various tics, the most prolific being erratic and explicit language. However, as I Swear expertly showcases, the syndrome is far more than ill-timed outbursts of curse words. Davidson’s story is one of societal frustration, finding your people (both with and without the condition), and using your voice to help others rise. The subject and subject matter are handled with absolute care and understanding under Kirk’s measured vision and Robert Aramayo’s BAFTA-winning performance.

The film kicks off with the greatest exclamation to democracy ever uttered (*%#! the Queen!), as a nervous John Davidson prepares himself before entering an awards ceremony hosted by Britain’s royal family. Right away, the film tells us what it is: a triumph over adversity that blends humor and human drama with education. It’s an important setup, as the film flashes back to Davidson’s 1980s youth, where we see his time as a star soccer recruit flatline as his condition takes hold. Davidson’s life spirals from there. Some aspects, like school bullying and accidental run-ins with authority figures, are expected but important to empathizing with young Davidson’s (young version, played with heart by Scott Ellis Watson) new everyday life. The more tragic, a complete meltdown of his family system, is unsettling if quick. His father (Steven Cree) is never given enough screen time to explore his alcohol coping tendencies. However, his mother Heather’s descent into easy fixes and blaming is crushing and convincing. Harry Potter series actress Shirley Henderson (Moaning Myrtle) gives a layered performance as Heather. Someone who loves her son, but also feels cursed by him as the entire family exits the picture. It’s bitter, she’s tired, and fills each conversation with ‘only medication and your mother can save you’ energy.

Shirley Henderson (left), Maxine Peake (right) in ‘I Swear’ – image courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics and the Milwaukee Film Festival

 

From there, the viewer and Davidson find refuge in a host of characters. Maxine Peake plays Dottie, the mother of a childhood friend and a retired mental health nurse. Screen vet Peter Mullan plays maintenance man Tommy Trotter. Together, they help Davidson build a life and an understanding of himself that carries the film forward into its second half. After that, the film is primarily a 3-actor show as director Kirk fills the screen with these tour-de-force performances. Peake and Mullan are great vessels to get the film’s main message across: patience, love, and a shared responsibility between the diagnosed and those who understand their struggle can help change the path for people quickly left behind by a normative world. Together, they are the soul of the movie, with the filmmakers clearly hoping the audience will follow their lead after they exit the theater (in my case, the beautiful Oriental Theater for the Milwaukee Film Festival). Both performances are perfectly warm and reflective and shouldn’t be left out in discussions of I Swear.

A person standing in front of a yellow curtain holds up a bouquet of colorful flowers while facing an audience.
Robert Aramayo in ‘I Swear’ – image courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics and the Milwaukee Film Festival

 

I say this because the movie is anchored by The Rings of Power actor Robert Aramayo, who leaves Elrond’s elf ears behind to bring an acute naturalism to his performance of main character John Davidson. Aramayo’s physicality and timing of the fitful Tourettes Syndrome never feel out of place or overplayed. In fact, the movie as a whole does an amazing job of never veering into sentimentality. While many moviegoers left with tissues dabbing their eyes, the filmmaking never felt like it was forcing that reaction out of audiences. It straddles the line between feel-good and reality with every story beat and lands squarely on the side of letting the real inform our feelings. Anyone with an ounce of empathy will grasp the film’s message and hopefully take it with them into life. 

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I Swear continues at the Milwaukee Film Festival on Tuesday, April 21st, and releases nationwide April 24th, 2026, courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics. 

I SWEAR | Official US Trailer (2026)

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Movie Reviews

Six 100-Word Movie Reviews

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Six 100-Word Movie Reviews

Pizza Movie (2026) Director: Nick Kocher and Brian McElhaney, Star: Gaten Matarazzo and Sean Giambrone

Somehow, I got through an hour of this movie. I was seconds away from turning off in the first fifteen minutes because of the juvenile humor. Pizza Movie is too silly, repetitive, and the characters are annoying. Stranger Things Gaten Matarazzo and Sean Giambrone star as college friends, Jack and Montgomery. College angles are rarely seen in films right now, and that’s the one saving grace of the film. Similar to high school, people are also trying to fit in. The story and visuals were too corny. You can only watch someone’s head exploding for so long without letting yours.

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026) Director: Aaron Horvath and Michael Jelenic, Stars: Chris Pratt, Charlie Day, Anya Taylor-Joy

I never saw the first Super Mario Brothers Movie when it was out, but I heard it got positive reviews. My brother always loved playing Super Mario video games as a kid, and I’d watch him. I tagged along with my friends to see Super Mario Galaxy Movie, and it’s a cute and fun film. I like it when movies explore the video game world. The animation creates unique worlds and characters. The characters are split into their own storylines, and for me, I felt like it worked. It adds more action, especially for kids who are seeing the films.

Emily in Paris Season 5 (2025) Creator: Darren Star, Stars: Lily Collins and Ashley Park

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After a bright spot in season 4, I thought season 5 of Emily in Paris would continue its growth in the story and its protagonist, but no, it’s all drained out in the usual Emily (Lily Collins) mishaps. Ashley Park (Mindy) has become too good for this show. Emily and Mindy waste several opportunities because of their love lives. The whole relationship angle is ruining it. I don’t understand why Alfie (Lucien Laviscount) is still in the show. I thought writers learned their lesson, but by the last episode, they’re continuing to bring the past into an apparent season 6.

Sarah’s Oil (2025) Director: Cyrus Nowrasteh, Stars: Naya Desir-Johnson and Zachary Levi

There’s always history lurking right beneath our noses. Sarah’s Oil (2025) tells the true story of Sarah Rector, an Oklahoma-born African American girl who became the first black female millionaire in the U.S. Naya Desir-Johnson is fierce and driven as Sarah. Zachary Levi is also along for the ride as Bert, a man who helps Sarah. Kate (Bridget Regan) was another favorite character as an intelligent woman. Cyrus Nowrasteh was drawn to the subject for its story and its themes. Nowrasteh’s direction is compelling as he unearths a hidden story from history. The film is streaming on Amazon Prime.

Jack Goes Boating (2014) Director and Star: Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Amy Ryan

Jack Goes Boating (2014) didn’t quite work for me, largely because of its slow pace and uneven storytelling. The film stars the late Seymour Hoffman as Jack, who also directed the film. This was Hoffman’s first and only time in the directing chair. Amy Ryan also stars in the film, giving a solid performance. This was also based on a play that Hoffman starred in. Jack wants to participate in a swim championship. That’s hardly what the film is about, tracking other characters’ stories. While the film aims for quiet intimacy, it ultimately drags, making it an underwhelming viewing experience.

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You Kill Me (2016), Director: John Dahl, Stars: Ben Kingsley, Tea Leoni, Luke Wilson

Meet You Kill Me (2016), yet another film that I found in the museum of underrated gems. The concept revolves around Frank (Ben Kingsley), a hitman, who is sent to an A.A. meeting to get his mind focused again. A different story happens, where Frank falls in love with Laurel (Tea Leoni). Leoni is one of my favorite actresses. It also stars the funny Luke Wilson. I liked the trio’s dynamics. You Kill Me is a mental health movie. It’s okay to make changes if you’re not happy. I recommended that you keep an eye out for this movie.

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Movie Reviews

Movie Review – Desert Warrior (2026)

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Movie Review – Desert Warrior (2026)

Desert Warrior, 2026.

Directed by Rupert Wyatt.
Starring Anthony Mackie, Aiysha Hart, Ben Kingsley, Ghassan Massoud, Sharlto Copley, Sami Bouajila, Lamis Ammar, Géza Röhrig, Numan Acar, Nabil Elouahabi, Hakeem Jomah, Ramsey Faragallah, Saïd Boumazoughe, and Soheil Bostani.

SYNOPSIS:

An honorable and mysterious rogue, known as Hanzala, makes himself an enemy of the Emperor Kisra after he helps a fugitive king and princess in the desert.

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With aspirations of being a historical epic harkening back to the sword and sandal blockbusters of yesteryear, Rupert Wyatt’s seventeenth-century Arabia tale is about as generic and epically dull as one would expect from a film plainly titled Desert Warrior. Yes, there appear to be real locations here, and there are some admittedly sweeping shots of various tribes storming into battle on horseback and camels, but it’s all in service of a mess that is both miscast and questionable as the work of a filmmaking team of mostly white creatives.

The story of Emperor Kisraa (Ben Kingsley, a distracting presence even with only one or two scenes) rounding up women from other tribes to be his concubines, which inevitably became the catalyst for a revolution led by Princess Hind (Aiysha Hart), uniting all the divided clans and strategizing battle plans for flanking and poisoning, is undeniably ripe for cinematic treatment. The problem is that what’s here from Rupert Wyatt (and screenwriters Erica Beeney, Gary Ross, and David Self) is less than nothing in the primary creative process; no one seems to have a connection to Arabic heritage or culture, but they have made a flat-out boring film that is often narratively incoherent.

Following the death of her father and escaping the clutches of oppression, the honorable Princess Hind joins forces with a troubled, nameless bandit played by Anthony Mackie (he totally belongs here…), who seems to be here solely to give the movie some star power boost without running the risk of white savior accusations. Whatever the case may be, it’s jarring, but not quite as disorienting as how little screen time he has despite being billed as the lead and how little characterization he has. It is, however, equally disorienting as some of the other names that show up along the way.

As for the other factions, Princess Hind talks to them one by one, giving the film an adventure feel that fails to capitalize on using beautiful scenery in striking or visually poignant ways at almost every turn; the leaders of these tribes also often have no character. There also isn’t much of an understanding of why these tribes are at odds with one another. This movie is filled with dialogue that consistently and shockingly amounts to vague nothingness. Nevertheless, each tribe doesn’t take much convincing to begin with, meaning that not only is the film repetitive, but it’s also lifeless when characters are in conversation.

That Desert Warrior does occasionally spring to life, and a bloated 2+ running time is a small miracle. This is typically accomplished through the occasional fight scene between factions that also serves to demonstrate Princess Hind coming into her own as a warrior. When the tribes are united in a massive-scale battle, and that plan is unfolding step by step, one certainly sees why someone would want to tell this story and pull it off with such spectacle. However, this film is as dry as the desert itself.

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Flickering Myth Rating – Film: ★ ★ / Movie: ★ ★

Robert Kojder

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=embed/playlist

 

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