Kandace Washington speaks following passing of son Kyren Lacy

BATON ROUGE, La. (WAFB) – Three weeks ago, Kandace Washington buried her eldest son LSU standout receiver Kyren Lacy who died by suicide. Sadly, this isn’t the first time Washington has experienced this type of tragedy.

May is Mental Health Awareness Month. We sat down with Washington, who is a school counselor, to discuss how she’s using her story of strength and resilience to inspire others who may be struggling. She also explains how her voice has guided her through the darkest of times…including now.

Singing has been a saving grace for Washington. It’s how she coped with the loss of her father as a child and now her son Kyren, both dying by suicide.

“You never think that you’re going to bury your child, so in my mind I don’t think anything can get any worse and then this happened and I’m like…I don’t understand,” Washington said.

She adds, “Growing up when I was four or five unfortunately my father committed suicide and then when I was 13 my mom passed away from ALS.”

The void left her sister to run a household of four.

“My oldest sister was in college when my mom passed away. She actually had a scholarship to sing in the choir at Southern University and she left Southern to come and raise us after all that happened. So that was pretty tough growing up without parents,” Washington explained.

Washington became a parent herself at 17…giving birth to Kyren while still in high school. Now she’s a high school counselor in Texas.

“This new normal is just a part of my calling,” Washington said.

She plans to use her story to help her students find their way.

“We see it. A lot of students struggling with mental health. Different things that they’re going through at home. How to balance. How to juggle everything,” said Washington.

She is a counselor now offering unique insight on the subject of suicide.

“Just give them some hope, some light at the end of the tunnel. And I can share it, you know, from both perspectives you know. Because at one point it took me almost 40 years to even understand what my dad was going through because I was looking at it as, you know, you left. You didn’t think about me. You didn’t care about me. It took me over 40 years to just really have empathy and to understand that you know the weight of the world sometimes is a lot. And so now that I’m experiencing it with Karen again… I just have so much empathy. And then I’ve seen some of the things that he’s had to go thought and endure and I have a lot of empathy for my dad and Kyren.”

And she has advice for other parents.

“I would just encourage parents to talk to their kids, and to listen. To listen and to understand,” Washington said.

She also recommends talking to your children about the dangers of social media and bullying online.

“If you’re on social media and you’re commenting negative things and when you close your phone and you close your laptop and you feel good about yourself… something is wrong,” Washington said.

Washington believes her son Kyren became a target after he was arrested in January after of being accused of driving recklessly and causing a deadly accident. She says the crash and all that followed pushed things over the edge.

“People go through things. They make mistakes. They make wrong decisions. Everybody has. They only difference with my son is everybody knew who he was,” Washington says.

Washington explained she still can’t fully comprehend what her son was feeling before his death but hopes time will bring clarity and healing.

“I believe that with time, everything will reveal itself, but right now it’s a lot of unanswered questions,” she said.

What Washington knows for certain is that her family, her faith, and her music will see her through as she returns to her job as a counselor in the fall. She hopes to preserve her son’s legacy by continuing his work to uplift the community.

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