Grief and getting through the holidays: Susan Hamme (Opinion)

Guest columnist Susan Hamme is team leader for counseling services at the Hospice of the Western Reserve.

The inevitable question grieving people ask this time of year is, “How will I ever get through the holidays?”

Whether it is the first or second holiday season they face after the death of a loved one, the added strains can create increased pressure for people already experiencing the intense feelings of grief.

How do you “get through” the holidays? There is no single answer.

Western Reserve Grief Services is a community-based grief support program that provides services throughout Northern Ohio and offers support to anyone who has experienced a loss due to death.

Grief and mourning are intimately connected but distinct processes in the journey

of coping with loss. Distinguishing between grief and mourning is crucial for acknowledging and respecting the fluidity of the grieving process.

Grief is the internal, deeply personal emotional response to loss, encompassing a range of emotions. It is an individual’s unique experience of processing and coming to terms with their loss.

Mourning, on the other hand, is the outward expression and manifestation of grief. It often involves rituals and behaviors that serve to remember, honor and commemorate the deceased.

When experiencing grief during the holidays, these traditions and rituals can undergo significant transformations. Family traditions may have changed since the death. It may seem like nothing is the same as it used to be, or that everything is exactly the same except that your loved one is missing.

Some families choose to adapt their traditions to incorporate elements that pay tribute to their lost loved ones; others may decide to temporarily set aside certain rituals.

Hospice of the Western Reserve Grief Services offers valuable resources to help provide support and comfort and reduce stress when planning for the holidays and these experiences.

Our Holiday Plan worksheet helps to anticipate the most difficult parts of the holiday season, identifies who you can turn to for support and teaches you how to recognize grief triggers.

Should you choose to honor your loved one, we offer a Holiday Remembrance guide that encourages you to light a series of five candles symbolizing your grief, courage, memories, love and hope.

For those who may be seeking connectivity with others during this time, our monthly grief support groups can offer a sense of community and belonging, helping individuals navigate their grief while also fostering a sense of hope and healing.

This holiday season, we remind you that you can find continued meaning in the holidays and in life. You can continue to live and love fully. You must grieve, but you can also celebrate.

Let this be your guiding thought: Do what is comfortable for you.

If you or someone you know may be in need of grief support services this holiday season, we encourage you to contact one of our Bereavement Centers (listed below) or visit us online at hospicewr.org/holidaygrief.

The Elisabeth Severance Prentiss Bereavement Center

300 E. 185th Street, Cleveland, OH 44119-1330

216-486-6838

Hospice of Medina County: The Robertson Bereavement Center

5075 Windfall Road, Medina, OH 44256

330-725-1900

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