Lifestyle
‘Sebastian’ re-writes the sex work movie
Ruaridh Mollica in Sebastian.
Kino Lorber
hide caption
toggle caption
Kino Lorber
“So, tell me about yourself” are the first words you hear in the film Sebastian, delivered softly but directly by a nervous man trying to avoid monotone.
For anyone who’s ever dated or used hookup apps before, the awkward tension is recognizable enough to send a shiver of embarrassment down your spine.
“What do you want to know?” responds the voice of a much younger man, in a tone that suggests he really wants to know why the other man is interested.
What follows, only two minutes into the film’s nearly two-hour runtime, are the intense sights and sounds of lovemaking that seems so real it will have you checking the movie’s rating. Although this sexual encounter between two men is clearly not love, it isn’t a quick anonymous hookup either. It’s a transaction.
The young man who calls himself Sebastian is a sex worker for the digital age — meeting clients online and making their dreams come true for an hour or two in real life. Sebastian’s name is actually Max, and he isn’t really after money. Rather, he’s mining his experiences for stories.
“He’s kind of desperate to get this debut novel,” said Sebastian’s writer and director Mikko Mäkelä, but Max’s desperation threatens to unravel his ambitions.
NPR’s Ayesha Rascoe spoke with Mäkelä and star Ruaridh Mollica about what the film has to say about authenticity, sex and different generations of queer men.
No big deal
Mikko Mäkelä’s own journey of self-discovery led him to Sebastian. He told NPR that when he first moved to London after finishing university, he was inspired by the matter-of-fact stories his friends told about sex work.
“It really seemed to be becoming almost another option in London’s gig economy,” Mäkelä said. “The threshold to going into sex work seemed to really have lowered and I really wanted to craft a portrait of a character for whom sex work is a choice rather than something done out of a lack of them.”
Mäkelä said that he wasn’t interested in creating yet another sex worker drama focused on trauma — but that he didn’t want Max to be void of conflict either. In fact, the character’s dueling lives threaten to overwhelm him throughout the film.
Ruaridh Mollica said he felt the conflict brewing within his role from the very first reading.
“That’s why he decides to do it under the alias of Sebastian at the start. And I think once you decide to keep it a secret, it’s almost like [it] kind of festers and it becomes harder and harder to admit it,” Mollica said. “I don’t think Max wanted to feel judged or was in a position with himself where he felt comfortable enough, and like, self-accepting enough to be judged.”
Mäkelä said he wants the audience to question their own biases as Max does in the film.
“I think there is definitely a lot of hypocrisy around that idea where the [publishing] industry might, you know, fetishize those stories, but … a publisher might still judge the writer who is also a sex worker,” he said.
Framing every sex worker as a victim, backed into a corner, isn’t always accurate or interesting (something Max eventually finds out in the film). Neither is a film where the sex seems unrealistic, Mäkelä said.
Sex should be real and shameless
Queer viewers — especially those who identify as male — will be struck by how true-to-life the sex scenes are in Sebastian. The movements, sounds and, er, shall we say “mechanics,” are so accurate you may question whether there’s any pretending at all.
“The sex scenes were such an integral part of the story that they had to be thought of in just the same way as [the] building blocks of character,” director Mäkelä told NPR. “I think it’s really important to continue to provide for representation of queer sex where certainly, you know, there is more and more in [the] media, but … it’s not always realistic.”
Mäkelä identifies as gay himself, and his star Ruaridh Mollica said the 35-year-old writer/director’s script was already quite thorough. Still, Mäkelä enlisted the help of intimacy coordinator Rufai Ajala.
“It’s also important to work with a queer intimacy coordinator who would, you know, kind of understand the anatomy in [a] detailed way to make sure that those scenes did ring true to two queer audience members,” Mäkelä said. “And it was also really important to have a range of sex scenes with different clients and kind of see different body types … and ages.”
In Sebastian, Ruaridh Mollica plays an aspiring novelist who turns to sex work to gather material.
Kino Lorber
hide caption
toggle caption
Kino Lorber
Sebastian is actor Ruaridh Mollica’s biggest role, and having to be close-to-nude for much of the film made it a challenging one. He said having an intimacy coordinator like Ajala on-set was crucial.
“I think intimacy coordinators are so important nowadays,” Mollica told NPR. “They will just set you up with the other actor and you’ll do all these experiences and workshops of safe touches and going through each other’s bodies with each other in a very respectful way, and building boundaries and just feeling safe and comfortable. After about half an hour, you would feel so relaxed and trusting with your co-actor.”
Mollica said that, beyond the intimacy coordinators, he was just lucky to have such talented and gracious scene partners, including character actor Jonathan Hyde.
Ageism among queer men
Mollica vividly recalls working with Hyde, who plays the one client his character meets who actually steals his heart.
“Jonathan Hyde is one of the most wonderful people I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with. He was just such a silly, fun guy,” Mollica told NPR. “He gave his whole heart to those scenes and really almost brought this energy into the air of like, ‘no, let’s, let’s live this and be real here.’ We all dropped our guard and just got to be a part of it. And I think those scenes are some of the most powerful because of that.”
Hyde’s character Nicholas is an older literature professor who’s recently lost his partner of 29 years. He is almost immediately vulnerable with Mollica’s much younger Sebastian, and what starts as a transactional relationship soon develops into something sweet.
“I really wanted through that encounter for Max to be surprised and the audience to be surprised as well,” Mäkelä said. “I really wanted to challenge Max in what his preconceptions about sex work had been, and and what his experiences thus far had been.”
Jonathan Hyde in Sebastian.
Kino Lorber
hide caption
toggle caption
Kino Lorber
And the surprise, in part, is that Max (or Sebastian) isn’t expecting to fall in love with a man so much older than he is. Because, well, as Mäkelä put it: “I think the gay community can be and generally is quite horribly ageist.”
“I think maybe on a subconscious level, even I was wanting to kind of work against those preconceptions. Like Max says as well, outside of these meetings, there might not really be many other venues in which these characters would have anything to do with one another,” he said.
In the film, Max is steadfast in including the love story between him and Jonathan Hyde’s character in his novel, even if the publishers aren’t convinced. Because as he says in the film “they’re transmitting queer history and culture and that’s something I want to talk about.”
In the end, actor Ruaridh Mollica said he’s learned as much about acting as he has about himself from becoming Sebastian.
“I feel so much more confident in myself after that. And even my body confidence, you know, having to be practically naked on set every day and knowing that’s going to be released and it really has just been a complete self-acceptance of my sexuality,” said Mollica, who identifies as queer. “You know, it’s something that I was open about with people around me, but not something I had talked about so publicly before.”
Sebastian is playing in select theaters now.
Lifestyle
‘Supergirl’ has a solid hero but could use a better villain : Pop Culture Happy Hour
Milly Alcock in Supergirl.
Warner Bros. Pictures
hide caption
toggle caption
Warner Bros. Pictures
Hollywood’s newest Supergirl is kind of a dirtbag — in the good way. Fearless and grumpy, Supergirl (Milly Alcock) sets out on a quest to support a new pal’s revenge journey and to make a point that should be clear by now: Never mess with a lady’s dog. Also featuring David Corenswet and Jason Momoa, is Supergirl a worthy follow up to Superman?
If you want more DC superhero action, check out these episodes:
‘Superman’ takes off and nails the landing
‘The Batman’ puts the emo in emote
Connect with Pop Culture Happy Hour:
Letterboxd / Facebook
Our weekly newsletter
Support Pop Culture Happy Hour+
Lifestyle
L.A. Affairs: After decades of near-misses, I finally told him: ‘I’m not leaving here without you’
It didn’t take endless quarantining with my spouse during the COVID-19 pandemic to end my marriage of over two decades. By the summer of 2019, menopause — and the extra-added “bonus” of frontal fibrosing alopecia that it awakened — was pummeling me physically and mentally to the extent that I no longer had the capacity to function inside the dysfunction of my life.
The relief that came with the decision to finally let go was completely dwarfed by the immense pain of severing a family in two. I cried as I packed. I cried as I unpacked. I was rolling endlessly in a dark wave that would not stop; my feet could not tell sand from sky. Once I managed to break the surface, I reached out.
I called Tish, Diane and Michelle, three smart, strong, nurturing women who’d been through and survived divorce. I also called my brother, Dan, and my friends Doug and Steve, three kind, creative, funny men who always “got” me.
As for Steve, we met in the spring of 1984 when he auditioned to be the drummer for the Secrets, the band Dan, Doug and I had started the year before. In our small-town high school of fewer than 400 students, he had flown completely under my radar, as he was two years younger, and he joined marching band the year after I’d ditched my baritone horn for a microphone and Pat Benatar tights. Steve aced the audition, and the four of us clicked immediately over our shared love of the Pretenders and all things Monty Python. By mid-June, the Secrets were playing local bars and biker parties in the middle of nowhere, and I was head over heels in love with the drummer.
It wasn’t supposed to happen like that. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with a boy from my hometown.
I had spent my whole life dying to get out of Middlebourne, W.Va., and had been champing at the bit to leave for college, but by late August, that no longer meant freedom; it meant that I’d have to leave Steve behind. I told myself we’d defy the odds and make it work. He was my soul mate. But we were just kids, and there was no internet, no cellphones with unlimited text and calling. By February 1985, the divide was too great. In a moment of loneliness, I cheated on him. It was over, and I was firmly told to take my place in the friend zone.
I spent the following year flailing and failing in college before making the bold, half-baked decision to drop out of the West Virginia University theater program and move to Los Angeles, a place I’d never been, to pursue a singing career. When Steve found out that I was moving across the country, he softened his friend-zone stance and told me he loved me. On July 13, 1986, he went with my parents to Pittsburgh International Airport to see me off.
For the next 33 years, we would come together and drift apart — sometimes as lovers but mostly as friends. During a visit to my Hollywood apartment in 1988, when he was still in college and the timing was still wrong, I told him, “Who knows. Maybe in 30 years, I’ll come back and get you.”
In November 2019, Steve came to visit me for a long weekend.
I picked him up at Los Angeles International Airport and took him straight to Zuma Beach for a picnic, where we watched dolphins jumping in the waves while the seagulls stole our potato chips. The following day, we cozied up for an afternoon of wine and cheese at Cornell Wine Co. in Old Agoura, then made our way over Topanga Canyon for dinner at Canyon Bistro & Wine Bar.
The night before he flew home, we watched the sun set from our table by the lake at Zin Bistro Americana in Westlake Village. I felt giddy, excited, seen, understood and appreciated in a way I hadn’t felt in a very long time. While it was tempting to jump right in with both feet, we decided to date long distance and take things slowly.
On March 26, 2020, while Steve was still recovering from being profoundly ill with COVID, I arrived at his doorstep at 6 a.m. and proclaimed, “I’m not leaving here without you.”
Two weeks later, after packing most of his belongings into U-Haul shipping crates, we left Parkersburg, W.Va., in Steve’s red Volkswagen Golf with two suitcases, one Treeing Walker Coonhound and one Aussie/Chow mix. I-40 West was practically empty; just us and the occasional car or Amazon truck.
We arrived in California on Easter Sunday and joined the rest of the world in quarantine, not knowing how it would affect our work and financial future. We took a lot of long walks to help deal with the stress of the not knowing, but the magic panacea for me came the day Steve’s Harley-Davidson arrived in one of the crates.
We cruised up and down PCH, and roared our way up and over Mulholland Highway, Stunt Road, Malibu Canyon and Decker Canyon, stopping along the way to stretch our legs, feel the sea spray on our faces and take in views from the valleys to the coastline. We were surrounded by so much beauty; it was almost impossible to let trepidation win.
On one particularly memorable ride on Mulholland Highway between Kanan Road and SR 23 near Saddle Rock, we came around a bend and — bam! — right in front of me was the greenest mountain range I’d ever seen in California, gleaming spectacularly in the sunlight. As I inhaled its gorgeousness and exhaled my stress, I thought, “I can’t believe I get to see this. I can’t believe I get to do this. I can’t believe I get to be with Steve.”
In September 2024, I got to marry Steve.
As my brother, Dan, said at the reception, “What a long, strange trip it’s been.”
The author lives in the suburbs of Los Angeles with her husband, Steve, and their dogs, Coco Puff and Kira.
L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.
Lifestyle
‘The Bear’ is back in the kitchen
Sydney (Ayo Edebiri) and Carmy (Jeremy Allen White).
FX
hide caption
toggle caption
FX
There has always been a metaphorical parallel between The Bear, the television show, and The Bear, the fictional restaurant on the television show. Even as Carmy (Jeremy Allen White) and Sydney (Ayo Edebiri) transformed the Italian beef joint into the fancy restaurant of their dreams and wished for a Michelin star, there were undoubtedly locals who thought, “This is great and all, and I’m sure the food is good, but … I liked the beef sandwiches.” There’s still a window at The Bear to get them, but the focus is certainly elsewhere.
When it started, The Bear was mostly about the work that took place in the kitchen. The stresses of too many orders, territoriality from Richie (Ebon Moss-Bachrach), the arrival of Sydney, and the tightly wound but undeniably talented Carmy, making everybody both extremely stressed and significantly better. Over time, it shifted and grew, putting together beloved departure episodes like “Fishes” in Season 2, which introduced a boatload of guest stars for a flashback story of a disastrous family dinner before Mikey (Jon Bernthal) died. It spent time with Sydney’s family, it explored the way Tina (Liza Colón-Zayas) and Mikey originally met, it followed Marcus (Lionel Boyce) to Copenhagen, and it went with Richie to work for Andrea (Olivia Colman). All these episodes were excellent. And there was still a kitchen. But the focus seemed to be elsewhere.

At times, the show seemed to have disappeared up its own nose, to the point where you weren’t watching the show The Bear as much as you were watching the phenomenon The Bear. There were too many real-life chef cameos, until it seemed like those chefs were checking a box on a list of “things all the cool kids do.” There were too many other cameos, culminating in a rare miss from the reliably charismatic John Cena. The show placed a lot of narrative weight on Carmy’s love interest, Claire (Molly Gordon) — weight that the underwritten character couldn’t support. But even if every experiment and every diversion had worked, viewers couldn’t be blamed for missing the close focus on the kitchen and the camaraderie — for thinking, “This is all really special, but I do miss the beef sandwiches.”
The fifth and final season dispenses with the departure episodes, and it mostly dispenses with cameos. It all takes place on one day, just after Carmy tells Richie and Sydney that he wants to step back from the restaurant and give it to them and Sugar (Abby Elliott) to run, and it mostly takes place right there at The Bear. Now that the clock set by Jimmy (Oliver Platt) has run out, his money has run out as well, and a series of cascading disasters puts Sydney, Carmy and Richie behind the 8-ball from very early in the day, not least because of the tension hanging over all three of them as they prepare to tell the staff about Carmy’s decision to leave.
Tina (Liza Colón-Zayas).
FX
hide caption
toggle caption
FX
We spend this day mostly with the people we know best: our three leads, along with Sugar, Tina, Marcus, and the rest of the staff — including Luca (Will Poulter), who has stayed around to keep working with Marcus. Jimmy is running around with Computer (Brian Koppelman) and a young apprentice of his named Cheese (Elsie Fisher of Eighth Grade), trying to figure out what to do about his finances since it is Jimmy, and not just the restaurant, who’s out of money.
This day takes a while to get cooking, so to speak. The first three episodes of the season are slow, the first two in particular. It’s pouring rain outside, the lighting is dim, and the score maintains the same contemplative melancholy for a long, long time. For about two and a half episodes, it feels like one extended, low-energy scene.
But after that, there’s a shift in tone as the staff looks to get through service, and through seven episodes (FX did not make the finale available in advance for critics), the rest of the season is terrific. What you see is the core story of The Bear, which is people trying to serve food and overcome problems, but through the lens of everything that has happened over the show’s run: Carmy’s retreat from his obsessiveness, Richie’s expansive (and inspiring) discovery of his gift for hospitality; Sydney’s stepping forward from second-in-command to leader; Tina’s complex relationship with the restaurant and her grief over Mikey; Sugar and Carmy’s relationship with Donna (Jamie Lee Curtis); the arrival of Marcus as a high-end pastry chef.
The question the show asks over the last four episodes is: Given all those digressions and flashbacks, given all those visits with families and others, given everything we know about where all these people have been and what they’ve experienced, how does a high-pressure service — of the same kind we used to see in that first season — look now? How do they behave differently, and how does their behavior read differently? How are they the same people we have always known, but at a different juncture, in a different context? How do their wins mean more to them, and to the audience?
On the one hand, making a season this way, there are fewer surprising grace notes, like “Napkins,” the Tina/Mikey flashback episode in Season 3, or “Worms,” the episode in Season 4 where Sydney hung out with her cousin (Danielle Deadwyler) and her cousin’s kid. The Bear feels less daring and more conventional.
But oh, when they have victories under pressure? Victories, large or small? It is immensely, richly satisfying. There’s also more comedy other than just the goofy Faks family than we’ve had in a few seasons; Richie is perhaps the MVP of the season, and that’s partly because of how often he gets to be really funny. Ayo Edebiri continues to be the show’s best reactor, showing Syd eternally a little bit surprised (dismayed?) that she’s chosen to throw in her lot with these people.
There are a couple of questions yet to answer in the finale, both little plot items and broader character resolutions. Over these seven episodes, though, there is much to cheer.


-
Ohio26 seconds agoOhio State’s Bruce Thornton Has Perfect Draft Reaction After Landing With Rockets
-
Oklahoma7 minutes agoTexas A&M makes massive splash in transfer portal landing Oklahoma LHP
-
Oregon10 minutes agoOregon National Guard tests drone to remotely deliver explosive during training
-
Pennsylvania15 minutes agoHouse Republicans stall activity, Pennsylvania Rep. Meuser calls tactics ‘foolish’ | Fox Business Video
-
Rhode Island22 minutes ago32 photos capturing Rhode Island Pride’s nighttime magic
-
South-Carolina25 minutes ago
South Carolina adds to America250 time capsule set to be buried July 4
-
South Dakota30 minutes ago17 Republican attorneys general, including South Dakota’s, sue California over plastics law
-
Tennessee37 minutes ago‘Oppressive’ heat is on the way. How long will heat dome last in Tennessee