Lifestyle
L.A. Affairs: I expected Prince Charming at dinner. But then he wouldn’t shut up
I’m walking home when a man, who’s graying and handsome, stops me. “Excuse me,” he says. “You’re gorgeous.” I’m not hallucinating. The fairy tale has come true; my prince has arrived.
It’s the giddy 12-year-old in me who says thank you. It’s also the current me, with all the weight of my 49 years, who gives him my number and tells him to text me by Wednesday so we can have dinner on Friday.
Then I tell everyone: my work buddies, the baker at La Monarca Bakery, the barista at the Starbucks on Occidental, the fruit vendor on the corner of Virgil and West 3rd, and even the Koreatown ahjussi who preps my lunchtime Brussels sprouts.
By Wednesday, as I’m waiting in line at Apollonia’s Pizzeria, I realize Friday dinner is unlikely.
But around 8 p.m. that night, I get a text. Does dinner at Sushi Gen sound good? Yes. Yes? Yes!
We sit atop the planters outside the restaurant while we wait for a table. The conversation is stilted, so I ask him to tell me about his life and I tell him about my job. I love my work, but I’m worried. My boss just left the company, and what is an executive assistant without an executive to assist? Prince Charming snorts and says I’m lucky. He’s looking for a full-time job. I’m too startled by his snort to respond.
He says that he’s sure I’m great at my job. His best friend’s wife does something similar. She’s a shrew. He can tell I’m not.
I think about what it is to be a shrew and what goes into making a woman shrewish. Our table is called before I have the chance to parse through the implications.
Prince Charming launches into his life story right after we’re seated. I don’t tell him anything about me because he never asks and because he never stops talking. I’ve read enough Jane Austen to know his speech is the context for “A Very Important Declaration I Need to Hear.” His grand announcement is this: He’s been working part-time as a driver and at a car dealership since the early aughts while waiting for his big break. Earlier this year, he realized show biz was not for him. It is now time to settle down.
Prince Charming speaks his truth with the same gravity that Kevin Costner used to muster when he rhapsodized over cowboy life on “Yellowstone,” a show Costner claimed he loved but not enough to stay. Prince Charming is sincere. It’s wrong that I struggle to keep a straight face.
I understand we all have aspirations. I once wanted to be a professor. When that fell through and after the end of my first marriage, I wanted to be happy and have a job with benefits that covered my ADHD meds and antidepressants. After my second marriage, I also wanted to feel safe, be unharmed and never again be subject to anyone’s blackout rages.
I don’t tell him this, and it doesn’t matter. Because given the opportunity, I’d rather discuss my current life anyway. My summer is spent at the Hollywood Bowl. Winter and fall is for the L.A. Philharmonic, the L.A. Opera and holiday dinners with friends. Many nights are spent just happily lounging around the house. If I could, I’d like to tell him (and any prospective person) that my life is as good as it has ever been. Would he like to join me?
But my date continues to dominate the conversation throughout dinner, and I never speak of my past or my current life. I don’t mind because the eel is delicious and the cucumber salad is on point.
I’m silently thinking about what my options are if I get fired when I notice he’s staring at me. I lost the conversation’s thread a while back, so I ask him, “Do you travel much?”
My question gives him the opportunity to discuss his last trip to Vietnam. It was difficult, he admits, to stand by silently as his uncle bossed people around because he had more money than they did. He had trouble keeping his mouth shut and showing the proper respect for his elders, mostly because he found their behavior abhorrent.
My interest is piqued. I too have had to negotiate cultural and familial expectations. I was once married to a man who sometimes hit me when he was in a foul mood. In the month after I left him, my sister, a person whom I considered my best friend, invited him for dinner daily even though she knew what he had done. Our relationship frayed permanently the day she kicked me out of her house when I went to pick up her child so we could go to Disneyland.
I understand how difficult it is to negotiate family relations and expectations. But I don’t tell him this either. When he pays for dinner, he tips the waitstaff generously. I’m impressed. I know, my bar is low.
There is a tea shop across the parking lot. As we drink some matcha, he says that right now, all he wants is a job that pays and to feel he’s good at what he does. I understand. The year after I left my marriage, I set down a list of things I needed to do to regain myself — to recoup my life. The primary goal, to feel good about myself again, took about 10 years. At the moment, I really want that for him.
Almost a month later, I got a follow-up text from him inviting me out. I tell him the truth: I can’t because I’m volunteering at StokerCon, the horror literary convention.
But I wish I had texted him something else. At 49, I’ve already made my fairy-tale life come true. With all my heart, I hope he too is able to create the life he wants for himself. He deserves to have his dream come true. Everyone does. I should have said this.
The author is looking for a job and taking allergy shots so that she can one day become a spinster with two cats. She lives in Pasadena. She’s on Instagram: @aledmattoni
L.A. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L.A. area, and we want to hear your true story. We pay $400 for a published essay. Email LAAffairs@latimes.com. You can find submission guidelines here. You can find past columns here.
Actor TK Carter arrives for the premiere of “The LA Riot” at the Tribeca Film Festival, Monday, April 25, 2005, in New York.
Mary Altaffer/AP
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Mary Altaffer/AP
DUARTE, Calif. — Veteran actor T.K. Carter, who appeared in the horror film “The Thing” and “Punky Brewster” on television, has died at the age of 69.
Carter was declared dead Friday evening after deputies responded to a call regarding an unresponsive male in Duarte, California, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department.
Police did not disclose a cause of death or other details, but said no foul play was suspected.
Thomas Kent “T.K.” Carter was born Dec. 18, 1956, in New York City and was raised in Southern California.
He began his career in stand-up comedy and with acting roles. Carter had been acting for years before a breakthrough role as Nauls the cook in John Carpenter’s 1982 horror classic, “The Thing.” He also had a recurring role in the 1980s sitcom “Punky Brewster.”
Other big-screen roles include “Runaway Train” in 1985, “Ski Patrol” in 1990 and “Space Jam” in 1996.
“T.K. Carter was a consummate professional and a genuine soul whose talent transcended genres,” his publicist, Tony Freeman, said in a statement. “He brought laughter, truth, and humanity to every role he touched. His legacy will continue to inspire generations of artists and fans alike.”
Kylie Jenner
Cosmic Cleavage …
Flaunts Boobs While Pushing New Fragrance
Published
Kylie Jenner‘s full-bodied new fragrance is out … and, she’s using her bust to promote it — pushing up her cleavage for the ad.
The model posed in the sleeveless red leather top which perfectly matched the fragrance bottle she held against her head.
Waiting for your permission to load the Instagram Media.
The star’s looking away from camera … though we imagine if she could see fans looking at the pic, she might tell them her eyes were up about a foot or so!
She captioned the post by telling fans the new smell is called COSMIC INTENSE … a spin-off of her original “COSMIC” which feels “warmer, creamier, and even more addictive.”
KJ’s gotta promote the perfume now because she’s not going to have much time to work on her business in upcoming weeks … as we imagine she’ll attend every awards show with her man, Timothée Chalamet.
As you know … Chalamet got handsy with Jenner shortly after winning the Critics Choice Award for Best Actor — grabbing her backside while sitting in the audience. He’d just said he loved her in his acceptance speech as well.
Maybe Chalamet will grab a bit of her cosmic cleavage if he wins a Golden Globe this weekend!
A view of the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, which the current board is calling the Trump Kennedy Center, in Washington, DC, on Dec. 26, 2025.
Brendan Smialowski / AFP via Getty Images
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Brendan Smialowski / AFP via Getty Images
The Washington National Opera is leaving the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, its home since 1971.
Friday’s news, shared with NPR in a statement via email from the opera company, comes in response to new policies which the 70-year-old performing arts group said strain its financial model.
The Washington National Opera stressed the “amicability” of its decision to end its longtime residency at the Kennedy Center. But it said the center’s new business model, which requires productions to be fully-funded in advance, is incompatible with the usual mix of ticket sales, grants and donations that cannot all be secured ahead.
“Opera companies typically cover only 30-60% of costs through ticket sales, with the remainder from grants and donations that cannot be secured years ahead when productions must be planned,” the statement said.
The company added the model also does not accommodate its artistic mission, which aims to balance popular works such as West Side Story, slated for May 2026, with more obscure and experimental operas, such as the little-known Scott Joplin work, Treemonisha, scheduled for March. “Revenue from major productions traditionally subsidizes smaller, innovative works,” the statement said.
Artistic director Francesca Zambello, who has led the company for 14 seasons, shared her regrets in a statement with NPR, while also looking to the future.
“I am deeply saddened to leave the Kennedy Center,” Zambello said. “In the coming years, as we explore new venues and new ways of performing, Washington National Opera remains committed to its mission and artistic vision. Our repertory will continue to include diverse offerings, from monumental classics to more contemporary works, presented in bold visual productions with first-class musical values.”
In addition to a continued presence for now on the Kennedy Center website, the opera company launched its new independent website within a few hours of its announcement.
“After careful consideration, we have made the difficult decision to part ways with the Washington National Opera due to a financially challenging relationship,” the Kennedy Center wrote in an email to NPR on Friday. “We believe this represents the best path forward for both organizations and enables us to make responsible choices that support the financial stability and long-term future of the Trump Kennedy Center.”
On social media, Kennedy Center executive director Richard Grenell said it was the center’s decision to sever ties with the opera company — and not the other way around.
“The Trump Kennedy Center has made the decision to end the EXCLUSIVE partnership with the Washington Opera so that we can have the flexibility and funds to bring in operas from around the world and across the U.S.” Grenell said. “Having an EXCLUSIVE relationship has been extremely expensive and limiting in choice and variety.”
Grenell reposted his message on Saturday after he was alerted that his X.com account had been hacked and the original message had been removed.
President Donald Trump was named chairman of the Kennedy Center’s board in February 2025. His name was added to the Kennedy Center in December following a vote by the Trump-appointed members of its board. Since the power of the venue’s board to rename the center is currently in dispute, NPR continues to refer to the Kennedy Center using its legal name.
A string of exits
The Washington National Opera’s departure is the latest and perhaps most significant in a string of artist exits from the cultural institution since Trump took over the institution.
Backlash from ticket-buyers, slated performers, and certain board members—including Shonda Rhimes—was swift.
Artists are continuing to cancel performances. But one of the first to do so was a touring production of the musical Hamilton. In a statement on X in March 2025, producer Jeffrey Seller said he opposed the Trump administration’s ousting of many Democratic board members.
“The recent purge by the Trump Administration of both professional staff and performing arts events at or originally produced by the Kennedy Center flies in the face of everything this national center represents,” wrote Seller.
Actress and writer Issa Rae followed suit with a post on Instagram, cancelling her sold-out March performance.
A slew of additional artists and performance companies canceled after the board’s vote to rename the center “The Donald J. Trump and The John F. Kennedy Memorial Center for the Performing Arts.” Congress has not yet authorized the name change.
Grenell has responded to many cancellations on social media, condemning the artists. After Banjo player Béla Fleck canceled his performance because he said the center had become “political,” Grenell wrote on X, “You just made it political and caved to the woke mob who wants you to perform for only Lefties.
“This mob pressuring you will never be happy until you only play for Democrats. The Trump Kennedy Center believes all people are welcome—Democrats and Republicans and people uninterested in politics. We want performers who aren’t political—who simply love entertaining everyone regardless of who they voted for.”
Find a running list of these cancellations below.
Sonia De Los Santos
On Jan. 8, singer-songwriter Sonia De Los Santos announced on Instagram that she was canceling her upcoming February concert at the Kennedy Center. “As an artist,” wrote De Los Santos, “I treasure the freedom to create and share my music, and for many years I have used this privilege to uplift the stories of immigrants in this country.”
De Los Santos, who was nominated for a Latin Grammy for best children’s album in 2018, stated that “I do not feel that the current climate at this beloved venue represents a welcoming space for myself, my band, or our audience.”
Béla Fleck performs onstage during the 67th Annual Grammy Awards Premiere Ceremony at Peacock Theater on Feb. 2, 2025 in Los Angeles.
Leon Bennett/Getty Images for The Recording Academy
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Leon Bennett/Getty Images for The Recording Academy
Béla Fleck
Performing at the Kennedy Center “has become charged and political, at an institution where the focus should be on the music,” wrote American banjo player Béla Fleck about his scheduled appearance with the National Symphony Orchestra in an official statement posted to Instagram on Jan. 7. “I have withdrawn from my upcoming performance with the NSO at The Kennedy Center,” he wrote. “I look forward to playing with the NSO another time in the future when we can together share and celebrate art.”
The 18-time Grammy winner has performed at the Kennedy Center in the past.
Stephen Schwartz
The composer and lyricist for the beloved musicals Wicked, Godspell and Pippin was expected to host a gala fundraiser for the Washington National Opera in May 2026. On Jan. 2, Schwartz announced his withdrawal. According to NBC News, Schwartz reflected that the Kennedy Center was “founded to be a political home for free artistic expression for artists of all nationalities and ideologies.” Today, he said, making an appearance “has now become an ideological statement.”
Richard Grenell quickly responded to Schwartz’s withdrawal, calling it a “bogus” report in a statement posted on X and saying reporters were plagiarizing a “fake @RollingStone story.” Schwartz was “never signed,” Grenell wrote.
Reports from NBC and other outlets, including Variety, have refuted this claim, publishing screenshots showing that Schwartz was promoted on the Kennedy Center’s website prior to his cancellation.
Stephen Schwartz attends the 2025 Songwriters Hall Of Fame Induction Ceremony at Marriott Marquis Times Square on Jun. 12, 2025 in New York City.
Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Songwriters Hall Of Fame
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Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Songwriters Hall Of Fame
The Cookers
The seven-piece band of veteran jazz musicians announced shortly before Dec. 31 that they would not perform at the Kennedy Center for “A Jazz New Year’s Eve:”
“We know this news is disappointing,” reads the statement on their website. “We are not turning away from our audience, and do want to make sure that when we do return to the bandstand, the room is able to celebrate the full presence of the music and everyone in it. Our hope is that this moment will leave space for reflection, not resentment.”
The statement went on to say, “We remain committed to playing music that reaches across divisions rather than deepening them.”
Chuck Redd
The American jazz drummer and longtime host of the Kennedy Center’s annual Christmas Jazz Jam chose to cancel his 2025 appearance when he “saw the name change on the Kennedy Center website and then hours later on the building,” according to a statement sent to the Associated Press.
On Dec. 27, the Kennedy Center announced its plan to file a $1 million lawsuit against Redd. “Any artist canceling their show at the Trump Kennedy Center over political differences isn’t courageous or principled—they are selfish, intolerant, and have failed to meet the basic duty of a public artist: to perform for all people,” said Kennedy Center spokesperson Roma Daravi.
In a letter shared with NPR, Richard Grenell condemned Redd: “Regrettably, your action surrenders to the sad bullying tactics employed by certain elements on the left, who have sought to intimidate artists into boycotting performances at our national cultural center.”
Doug Varone and Dancers
“The renaming for me has kind of pushed me off a cliff,” said choreographer Doug Varone on Dec. 31, when he spoke with NPR’s Morning Edition. Varone, who was set to showcase members of his Doug Varone and Dancers company at the Kennedy Center in April 2026, pulled the performance.
John F. Kennedy, for whom the Kennedy Center was established as a living memorial, “believed in the arts as kind of the beating heart of our nation,” said Varone.
“I believe that the level of artistry has dropped drastically since the administration change, and the employees that were responsible for the quality of the work at the center have all been let go.”
After canceling, the company started a crowdfunding campaign to help offset its financial loss. It raised over $42,000, exceeding its $40,000 goal.
Magpie
In a statement posted to Facebook on Jan. 5, Greg Artzner of the American folk duo Magpie announced the decision to pull their Feb. 28 concert, set to play on the Kennedy Center’s Millennium Stage.
“There isn’t really anything defensible” about Trump, said the statement from Artzner and Magpie’s Terry Leonino. Although they had planned an evening of songs with messages of unity and hope, “We are personally and philosophically in agreement with the belief underlying the growing boycott,” they said. “The stand being taken by fellow artists we respect and admire has created a moral picket line. We stand with them in solidarity.”
An update on Jan. 9 said that Magpie would now be performing a longer version of that concert on Feb. 21 at Seekers Church in Washington, D.C., now called, “The Traveling John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts Restoration Roadshow.”
Kristy Lee
Folk singer Kristy Lee canceled her Jan. 14 Kennedy Center performance due to “recent efforts to impose political branding on the Center,” according to a statement posted on her website.
“Public arts spaces should be free from political influence,” Lee said in her statement. “I step back out of respect for artistic freedom and the Kennedy Center’s founding mission, not in opposition to its staff, artists, or audience.”
On Jan. 14, Lee plans to host a live-streamed concert instead, titled “Showing Up: From the Kennedy Center to the Couch.”
Low Cut Connie
Philadelphia rock and roll band Low Cut Connie pulled their concert, set for February 2025, “Upon learning that this institution that has run non-partisan for 54 years is now chaired by President Trump himself and his regime,” according to a statement posted on their Facebook page.
“Maybe my career will suffer from this decision,” wrote band frontman Adam Weiner, “but my soul will be the better for it.”
Rhiannon Giddens
In Feb. 2025, folk singer Rhiannon Giddens announced her departure from the Kennedy Center lineup in a social media statement. “I cannot in good conscience play at The Kennedy with the recent programming changes forced on the institution by this new board,” wrote Giddens.
Giddens transferred her May 11 concert, “Old-Time Revue,” to The Anthem concert hall, also in Washington, D.C.
Balún
The Puerto Rican band, based in Brooklyn in New York City, canceled their Kennedy Center performance, which had been set for Feb. 27, 2025.
According to a statement posted to Balún’s Instagram account, “recent events made it clear that the space no longer aligns with our values. Our safety, integrity, and commitment to justice come first.”
Issa Rae attends HBO’s final season premiere of “Insecure” at Kenneth Hahn Park on Oct. 21, 2021 in Los Angeles, California.
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Kevin Winter/Getty Images
Issa Rae
“Thank you so much for selling out the Kennedy Center for ‘An Evening With [Me],’” wrote Issa Rae, the acclaimed star and creator of HBO’s Insecure, on her Instagram stories page in Feb. 2025. “Unfortunately, due to what I believe to be an infringement on the values of an institution that has faithfully celebrated artists of all backgrounds through all mediums, I’ve decided to cancel my appearance at this venue.”
“Hamilton”
In March 2025, Hamilton producer Jeffrey Seller announced on X that the Tony-award winning musical phenomenon would no longer run as scheduled at the Kennedy Center. According to the statement, the decision was made both for political and for business reasons. Not only was there “a new spirit of partisanship,” the statement read in part, but “it would be “financially and personally devastating to the employees of Hamilton if the new leadership of the Kennedy Center suddenly canceled or re-negotiated our engagement. The actions of the new Chairman of the Board in recent weeks demonstrate that contracts and previous agreements simply cannot be trusted.”
The Kennedy Center was swift to respond to Hamilton‘s cancellation. On X in a now-deleted post, Richard Grenell accused Hamilton star and creator Lin Manuel-Miranda of being “intolerant of people who don’t agree with him politically,” and stated that the decision was “a publicity stunt that will backfire.”
In the months since the show’s cancellation at the Center, Hamilton has continued to sell out theaters on Broadway and in venues nationwide who host its North American touring company.
U.S. Marine Band
The U.S. Marine Band announced in February 2025 that the Marine Band would not perform in the Equity Arc Wind Symphony event, a collaboration between Marine Band members and selected high school musicians.
The U.S. Marine Band, known also as “The President’s Own” was founded by an Act of Congress in 1798, making it the country’s oldest professional music organization.
Composer Kevin Charoensri, whose music had been scheduled to be performed by the band at the event, stated in a Facebook post that Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) orders resulted in the cancellation of the Equity Arc concert:
“It has come to my attention that the program, one based on equity and diversity of voices, is no longer supported at the federal level under this administration,” Charoensri wrote. “It was for this reason that the program and performance were canceled.”
The U.S. Marine marching band performs in the 120th Tournament of Roses Parade January 1, 2009 in Pasadena, California.
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Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images
Jennifer Vanasco edited this story.
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